Five Ways to Feel Less Alone with Your Diabetes

By Amy Tenderich of www.DiabetesMine.com Published at September 8, 2009 Views 1,131 Comments 8 Likes 10

Amy Tenderich

One of the worst parts of living with diabetes can be the feeling of isolation. Despite well-meaning friends and family, most of us feel strongly that we’re struggling with this illness completely on our own.

For me personally, finding others to connect with here on the internet has been a Godsend. As my friend and colleague Dr. William Polonsky (author of the excellent book Diabetes Burnout) says: “There’s no underestimating the value of community support for everyone from the newly diagnosed to the long-term patient who might be feeling burned out by diabetes.”

People often ask me how to go about finding that community support – to offset the loneliness – so I sat down recently and made a list of five good places to start:

1) Recruit an Ally – try finding just one close friend or family member who’s truly open to learning about diabetes. Explain to them the basics of what you have to deal with every day. Then find a task or two that this person could help you with on a regular basis. It could be acting as your exercise partner, or assisting you with grocery shopping and menu planning, or even taking over as the main contact for your pharmacy, so you get some relief from renewing prescriptions all the time.

2) Attend a Meetup / Seminar – Finding local support groups, classes and seminars is usually as simple as doing a quick online search or calling your local hospital. Most of these programs are free or low cost, and they offer a great way to meet and mingle with other people with diabetes and learn some ways to improve your diabetes care at the same time. Many clinics and medical groups across the country now offer top-notch personalized programs as well, which allow you to talk over your biggest challenges with an educator or nutritionist. If you’re here on DiabeticConnect.com, you probably know that you can click on the Events section of this site to view various local happenings. Especially recommended is the nationwide TCOYD (Taking Control of Your Diabetes) conference series. Dates and venues can be found at www.tcoyd.org.

3) Read a Good (Diabetes) Book – This one you can do from the comfort of your couch. It really is worth exploring the newest books on diabetes care, which are not “medical” in nature but rather practical, upbeat guides to living a satisfying life with diabetes. I’m thinking of the brand new patient-written pocket guide “Taming the Tiger: Your First Year with Diabetes” for example, or the bold and colorful “Real-Life Guide to Diabetes” by educators Hope Warshaw and Joy Pape. Diabetes journalist David Mendosa has also written several good books, including “What Makes My Glucose Go Up and Down?” For a real feel-good experience, try Riva Greenberg’s “The ABC’s of Loving Yourself with Diabetes.” Her newest title, “50 Diabetes Myths That Can Ruin Your Life: And the 50 Diabetes Truths That Can Save It” was just published in July. Simply knowing there’s a market for all these practical diabetes guides makes me feel like part of a large community – and a lot less alone in this world.

4) Watch the TV show – if you’re not familiar with it, you’ll definitely want to check your TV Guide for the cable show “dLife,” which airs on CNBC every Sunday at 4pm Pacific / 7pm Eastern. The show features excerpts on real people dealing with all sorts of diabetes issues, expert advice, recipes and more. You will definitely feel less alone watching this show!

5) Give Twitter a Try – for the real internet enthusiasts… If you’re interested in going beyond a networking web site like DiabeticConnect, and keeping up a constant stream of diabetes-related conversation, visit Twitter.com. You can join for free, set up your own profile page, and then search for other users talking about diabetes by typing the in the search term ‘#diabetes.’ You’ll need that hash sign in front of the search term in order to make it work. There you’ll find a 24-hour stream of “mini-messages” from other diabetes patients all over the country and the world — definitely a great reminder that diabetics are everywhere, and interested in reaching out to help each other.

As an addendum, I’d like to add that it’s worth taking the time to find the right doctor, whom you feel supports you as a person. I plan to address that issue in a separate article, coming here soon.

Meanwhile, let’s face it: in America, we’ve always had an ‘every man for himself’ mentality, so that seems normal to us. So support is not built into our system; we have to make an extra effort to find it and give it to others. Luckily, support resources for those with diabetes are on the rise.

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Comments (8 comments)

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camerashy
camerashy August 17 at 6:30 pm   

I've always worked with other people who were diabetic, but the one that got me worst was my boss. He always knew more than the doctor, and the doctor didn't know what he was talking about. Well, now that he's diabetic himself (due to pancreatitis) he's not so full of hot air! Goes to show.

Turtle
Turtle August 17 at 1:55 pm   

I am happy you liked my article.

Diaschm
Diaschm August 3 at 12:56 am   

I thought your article was excellent ! I do meditation and Biofeedback. I learned these two because I have a pain condition called Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy and I tried to help myself with doing meditation , biofeedback and of course medication. So when I found out I was a type 2 Diabetic these are two that have helped me survive with being now a diabetic. I was glad to see your recomendations. I think all of these will help us all with all the complications and ups and downs that every illness has with it. We take each day and try to do the best we can. I think accepting what is put before us is important. I had always delt with my pain problem but I at first denied my diabetes. Now I have accepted it and hopefully I am facing it in a positive way. This site has helped me do this and I am thankful to have made good friends on this site and gained alot of useful info. Again thank you everyone who contributes to this site!!

Sue Farris
Sue Farris February 8, 2010 at 12:00 pm   

I find that people without diabetes thank they know more then the people with diabetes and are always telling you what you should be doing. After 37 years with diabetes it gets under my skin.

jayabee52
jayabee52 November 8, 2009 at 11:44 am   

Amy you NAILED IT! Thanks for sharing.

FLDawn
FLDawn September 27, 2009 at 10:33 am   

Amy thank you so much for having this site with John. I try to tell others about it because without finding all of you I was very afraid and did feel alone.

As always your articles hit things right on the nose.

As a volunteer under the umbrella of the State AG office I assist at many health fairs. Do you have any type of pamphlets etc that are available with the website on it and that explains the site a bit? If not I will create something here to print out if that is acceptable with you and John. I want others to know they are not alone.

If not for a health fair I may not be here now. I had my blood sugar tested at one in July. That led me to further tests and a diagnosis of 7.4 in an A1C. I was put on Metformin and feel such a difference. As I tell others, I was sleeping and dead to the world 24/7 other than sometimes eating and using the bathroom. When I did those I was barely awake and neighbors would ask where I have been because my car did not move. Since being on meds and on a better diet and swimming I feel alive again.

IF you ahve anything that can be shared at health fairs I would love to be able to do that for people. I was at one yesterday and have another Tuesday. I also have at least one already known for October. Living in a 55+ community there are also people here who would benefit so I am trying to organize something here. Not about diabetes because I am a newbie but to have others join my group called Srs VS Crime which as I said is under the umbrella as a special project of the Florida AG's office. FYI…WE the volunteers are the seniors LOL.

Thank you again for being here. I have never found so many nice people in one spot before.

Dawn

Turtle
Turtle September 27, 2009 at 2:06 am   

This is an excellent article. It helps to give me some ideas. When I think of myself as a person with diabetes, I do not tend to think of it as an illness or a disease. I think of it as a medical condition. That way, I am not ignoring the fact that it is there and I do not feel so weighted down by it at the same time.
Thank you for sharing.
Turtle

FLDawn
FLDawn September 12, 2009 at 4:14 pm   

You have pretty much covered it all for a newbie like me. The support and kindness I have found on this site is incredible. If only the rest of the world could be as sharing and caring about others it would be a wonderful world. Thank you for being so straight with us and having such an informative networking site.