Like "Hi Sue: I too have those thoughts and feelings. On occasion in the past I had acted upon them. I still have days when I feel like that. So far, my medications are helping (to me helping or working is not attempting suicide)...but, unfortunately they are not a cure. I try all kinds of things to help: Follow medical treatment, therapy sessions, proper vitamins, enough sunlight many days (I moved from Minnesota partially because of my severe depression). I read an article about depression on the Mayo Clinic's website some time ago, but I recalled one section saying that living in the northern states can be a factor in causing depression. They listed Minnesota as one of the states. I was kind of in shock, but read more and it became much clearer to me how that could be. The lack of sunshine takes away vitamins from your body, I believe it was "D" specifically, but don't quote me on that. It has a tendency to depress oneself because of the longer winters and less chance of sunshine. I believe it with all my heart. Come early fall, I have my medications adjusted to prepare for the winter season. Thank goodness it's not as bad here in Oklahoma. I live with people who also suffer from depression. Each for different reasons. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is one of them (which I also have). So I see depression around me plus the severe depression I have, it makes for a big downer. I have found though, that if we can be comical and have a good sense of humor, it helps each of us. Takes some of the pressure off and lightens the load that I try to let God help me with. I think I have side tracked here. This time of year is usually the worst because of holidays, winter around the corner, etc. You spend all your time trying to do for others and your last on the list if at all. If a friend should ask you out or to visit. Force yourself to say yes. It'll help having someone around you. Don't isolate yourself (I should talk, I do it all the time, but I know it's not good for me). I have tried sunlamps and the like, which for me are no substitute for the warm wonderful sun. If you can try just sitting in a sunny window and closing your eyes while it shines in on you. I hope you will start thinking how great it feels, and then those thoughts lead to other more soothing things. This one does help me. I thank God for every sunny day we have. Last but not least, don't forget you have a friend in each and everyone of us right here on this website. The people here have done good things for me and I think that letting it out to others who really do care, helps a great deal. I will be praying for you and thinking of you daily (you've also helped me in letting me know I'm not alone). Your depressed new friend, LOL Pam"