Like "first,i want to say, no one on this site has ever offended me. what i have found is a diverse group of people that care for one another. and it is precisely for this reason i can come to you all and be myself! i have always felt that i was in the last position possible! so when i found myself being first in the bad luck it was maddening to the me that is me! i have talked to ministers in the past, and they have their love for the ministry. but never have i recieved the acceptance as the imperfect person that i am. yes my sense of humor saves me most of the time! but even so i can not bring myself to put on a false front. so sometimes i'm makeing it and some times i skate the thin ice. i have come to realize that a lot of people are suffering and some don't seem to suffer anything. i guess that is life! i have family and i have put them first. do i have them to live for? i would have liked to have lived a little more for myself! selfish! so be it! but i love you guys, because i feel you really care! something that my church friends never seemed to accomplish! bless each and everyone of you for putting up with the ramblings of this ol' girl! i'll get up again! you've helped me! thanks!!"