In denial for a long time after being diagnosed.

Eversinging1
By Eversinging1 Latest Reply 2010-11-18 09:02:53 -0600
Started 2010-11-04 10:21:53 -0500

I was diagnosed about a year and a half ago. My fasting bs was 150, so doc just told me to watch what I eat and lose some weight. I had gained back 40 pounds in about 3-4 months time. My dad was diabetic and took 2 shots a day. I was terrified. I'm a needle-phobe. Got into a deep funk. Checked my blood twice a day, cut carbs out dramatically (Atkins), did some walking on my lunch break. BS stayed with the 80-120 range doc wanted me in. So I thought, maybe he was wrong and I'm not diabetic.

So I started cheating a little bit here and there. Quit walking and quit Atkins (too hard to stay on for any length of time). bs was still okay. So I quit monitoring it closely..just sporadically. Then one day I checked it and my bs was 212. I went WTF???? Then started checking it more often and it would be anywhere from 160's to well over 200, sometimes even higher. Uh oh.

So, went back on Atkins and gained 2 pounds. WTF???? My hair was brittle, my skin was dry and making me look my age…I'm in denial there, too! :)
My feet hurt. My heels. Bad. Excrutiating pain. I feel like my feet can't hold me up sometimes, especially when I first wake up. So walking is not an option right now. Doc told me to get some arch supports..I did…they still hurt bad.

Now I can't get my bs under 140 no matter what I do. I wake up in the morning and it's in the 180's or higher. I'm watching what I eat, making sure I get more protein and fiber and less carbs. And can't get a handle on it. I'm afraid to tell my doc (I think he may have forgotten I'm diabetic) cause I know he'll want to put me on meds and I'm afraid if I go on them I will never get off them. I hate taking meds. I did finally agree to BP pills because I don't want to stroke out. I have sleep apnea so I don't sleep good, which I know has a bearing on my BS readings.

Now the funk is back. I'm not motivated to "suck up" the pain and start walking. I don't know how to proceed from here. Could really use some suggestions, without someone YELLING AT ME ONLINE and telling me to quit whining. I know I need to do something but there's so much information out there regarding diets for diabetics and exercise and blah blah…information overload. And like I said, the motivation is lacking. I keep thinking I should be motivated because I don't want the complications this disease can cause. sigh…HELP!!


82 replies

LadyRenee
LadyRenee 2010-11-16 11:38:47 -0600 Report

I have been type 1 since i was 7 years old and I will say Weight Watchers has help me to keep my weight under control and walking has help alot too. Weight Watchers is releasing their new program this moth oin the 28th , it counts carbs. It will be called power points. Start there my friend, and watch your carbs, too that will help you to mantain your sugers levels.

Debra Austin
Debra Austin 2010-11-16 10:36:24 -0600 Report

I..was..told..two..years..ago..that..i..was..diabetic…My..mom..has..been
for..25yrs..with..no..problems..so..I.was..like..ok…I'll..take..my..little..pill..
and..i'll..be..fine..Well..that..little..pill..has..turned..into..2..different..pills
3times..a..day!!!i..was..only..31..my..mom..was..around..40…
I..have..finally..woke..up..to..the..reality..of..this..nasty..disease..
My..moms..twin..sis..hasn't..been..as..lucky…She..has..just..had..a..leg..
removed…I..now..know..if..I..don't..take..more..of..an..active..roll..in
my..fight..I'll..be..headed..to..the..point..my..aunt..is..in..no..time..

transkid05
transkid05 2010-11-14 17:22:34 -0600 Report

Hi! I was diagnosed with type 2one years after receiving a kidney transplant five years ago. I also am in denial and feel that my doctor must be wrong. The problem was picked up after I had labs done about a year ago. I had no hint of a problem but was aware that transplant drugs can bring on diabetes. Unfortunately I love soda and start my day with a coke much like others begin their day with coffee. I do generally watch my sugar intake. I confess I haven't monitored lately and always tell myself I have soda in my system so what is the use. I advocate kidney issues and well know that the game I am playing could have serious consequences but am so unmotivated to change my lifestyle (re exercise, giving up soda, etc) Are there any others transplantees here who can set me straight? What should I look for besides high numbers?

jayabee52
jayabee52 2010-11-14 19:55:52 -0600 Report

I am not a Kidney transplantee, so maybe i shouldn't post an answer to you, but I was on dialysis for a while - about 9 or 10 mos something like 4 years ago.

At the time of my Dx with ESRD I thought my life was OVER, that there wasn't any more good times to be had all I would have been doing was waiting to die. So I seriously thought about stopping dialysis and just let the disease take me. I even talked to the Soc Worker at the clinic about it.

I chose to continue with the dialysis because I didn't want to give my 3 boys the wrong example. I had been wrong about my life having no more good times left! In my case my kidneys started working again and I was able to come off dialysis. I met a wonderful lady online ("Jem"), and I eventually moved to her and we married.

My account may not be meaningful to you at your stage in life (i'm 58), but the reason I mention it is to let you know that your life is not over, even though you have been Dx'd with DMt2. You can live a good, full life with DM. You just have to take care of yourself.

You say you know "that the game I am playing could have serious consequences "(to quote you) But DO YOU REALLY?

I didn't take my DMt2 seriously for a while. My disregard cost me a 25 yr marriage, my kidneys functioning well, my ability to balance well, my dignity (I now have to wear a diaper due to not knowing when I have to have a BM or empty my bladder), my ability to get an erection. I also live with burning pain in my feet and legs and genitals, and loss of feeling in my hands.

I have "paid" A LOT for my disregard of DM early on. I realize that the cost could have been higher, due to other complications I COULD get. Gastroparesis (paralyzed stomach where you can't digest food properly) and Charcot foot (breakdown of bones in the foot) springs to mind at the moment.

So transkid, ignore DM at your peril. So you have to care for your kidneys AND care for your DM.

One thing just struck me, you didn't say if you're about to lose your transplanted kidney. I pray that you are able keep it.

May God bless you and yours

James

transkid05
transkid05 2010-11-15 19:03:41 -0600 Report

James, thank u so much for your reply. Anyone who has experienced dialysis is more than qualified to answer any questions. As far as my kidney all is fine and to this point there is no evidence of rejection. I guess why I am dragging my feet at this point is that I feel fine, a little tired but that could be my 60 years ganging up on me. I experience no symptoms that I can chalk up to diabetes. Should I not be experiencing some symptoms or is diabetes a "secret killer" also?

As I said, I am a kidney advocator and speak to groups as well as individuals online. I am well aware that diabetes and high blood pressure are the main causes of ESRD and preach that. The problems is that I feel fine. I am due to go to St. Louis for more bloodwork ASAP and the diabetes is of concern to my transplant team. I will obviously need to adhere to the diet and protocol for protection of my transplant but someone on the team needs to help here. To feel so good and have such a problem is sometimes hard to understand.

Thank you for setting me straight and reminding me one of the most important things relating to any chronic disease-"knowledge is power" and in this area, relating to this disease I temporarily lost my way.

May God bless you also!

Linda

jayabee52
jayabee52 2010-11-15 20:03:47 -0600 Report

You're most welcome Linda.

I had the DM before the need for dialysis, so don't know if that changes the calculus. At the time just prior to ESRD I too felt fine. I was very active doing what I loved, dancing (some very vigorous dancing I might add).

Looking back on it there were some symptoms of something going on, but didn't recoginze them at the time. I had danced Fri, Sat, sun. of that Halloween weekend. On Sat night (the most vigorous dance rhat weekend - "the contra" - like square dancing - ) I started to have an upset stomach, and "lost my cookies" and cut my night short. Sunday AM I seemed to be fine, and then the East coast swing dance class was Sun eve. I did OK there but feel a bit "off". Thought it was just after effects of Sat night. Finished the class and then went home because I felt "off" (I would usually go out after that and dance somewhere else). I went to bed and woke up the next morning — or so I thought. Somehow I ended up on my bedroom floor, and I had to look back to reconstruct what happened.

I went to bed the night of Nov 1. My son came to my room to pick me up to celebrate his birthday. His birthday was Nov 7. So I was out on the floor of my bedroom for 6 days! It took me a while to wrap my head around that one. Well Jon (my son) wanted to take me to the ER. But I FELT OK and argued with him about taking me to ER. I finally gave in thinking it was still nothing and I'd be out of the ER quickly (at that point I hadn't figured out that I had been on the floor without food, water or DM meds for 6 days.)

In ER they ran some tests, told me my kidneys had shut down and I'd need dialysis. SHOCKER! Eventually I received some anasthesia for something or another, and woke up in the ICU 2 days later. I stayed in that hospital for approx 2 weeks getting stabilized.

My point for telling you this is: you can't go by "I feel fine" to determine what's happening to and with your body.

I'm glad you're taking this seriously, Linda

God's continued blessings to you and yours

James

transkid05
transkid05 2010-11-15 23:55:08 -0600 Report

Thank you again! Yes I am definitely going to take this more seriously. I'll start pricking again tomorrow. Sometimes I simply get tired of maintaining and like a fool forget that that is not possible. I just got done revealing the power of God in my life on my website, remembering that I alone have not gotten me this far but God has carried me all the way. Thanks again!

Linda

jayabee52
jayabee52 2010-11-16 00:55:04 -0600 Report

Why tomorrow? I feel you might be better off if you start "pricking" ASAP.

I agree definitely with what you said you reported on your website. I believe I wouldn't be here breathing if it weren't for God and his grace & mercy towards me. I could have just as easily expired on that bedroom floor. but for some reason God kept me going. And I think I know at least part of that reason. Don't know it all but at least one little part.

Graylin Bee
Graylin Bee 2010-11-16 01:29:02 -0600 Report

Seems that there are several of us around here that God wants to keep breathing. Until it happened to me this year I was not as aware of how completely He sustains us. Linda I am so glad God can carry us when the way is tough. Wish i knew the reason He wants me where I'm at right now. Like you James, I think I know one little part. I just keep hoping I don't mess up the parts I don't have a clue about.

lmb2749
lmb2749 2010-11-16 11:56:43 -0600 Report

You are absolutely right, James! God indeed uses our mess ups. Sometimes that's the whole point of the mess up :)

Eversinging1
Eversinging1 2010-11-13 23:04:47 -0600 Report

I am SOOO glad I'm not alone in this! Thank you all for being here!

jayabee52
jayabee52 2010-11-13 23:20:22 -0600 Report

You're welcome.

I don't think anyone here is not happy about having DM. But since we DO it's good to go through this together as much as possible!

Thank you for joining us in our journey together

Emma2412
Emma2412 2010-11-12 12:22:50 -0600 Report

Dear Eversinging1:
Wow! You and I have a lot in common. I know so well what you are going through. I've had depression ever since I was a kid (not because of diabetes, though) but now since I've had diabetes I can't seem to deal with this diaease in an effective way. Oh, I'll start a "therapy" of some kind but I won't work it long enough for it to do much. I get upset that there isn't a miraculous overnight answer to it all.
There isn't anybody on DC who enjoys being a diabetic, though. And we all understand what you're going through but we also know that staying in a funk doesn't help us get anywhere. We each of us have to keep on trying to stay out of that funk. And I know I don't always make it out of the abyss, but I try every single day to climb at least a little bit out of that hole.
I find that the South Beach Diet is good for diabetics. I've tried the Atkins Diet but don't like it because I think it has too much of the wrong kind of fat. We diabetics have to watch things like fat. I find there's more variety on SB and the food is better and there's way more variety.
Since I was about 40 I've had trouble with my weight, but I didn't get diabetes until I was 59. I'm now 68.
Thank God you've got a supportive, loving husband!
By the way, I totally agree with Dr. Gary's advice. Everything he says is so true.
For myself, I have found that talking in depth about things to my best friend and sometimes my sister works to put things in perspective for myself.
Keep on keeping on, girl. I think I can speak without fear of contradiction when I say that everyone here at DC will stick with you no matter what. And no one is going to scream at you, either. Incidentally, when my doctor "screams" at me (LOL) I know she cares about me. Yours does, too. It's just frustration on her part because she wants to help me and see me healthier.
Emma

CaliKo
CaliKo 2010-11-12 12:32:19 -0600 Report

I'm lucky my doctor never yells. It's kind of funny, or sad maybe, how happy he is when someone actually does what he tells them to. "How'd you lose the weight?" "You sent me to a dietician, she gave me a meal plan … "

Jeanette Terry
Jeanette TerryPA 2010-11-09 16:38:31 -0600 Report

I went through denial most of my teeage years. I just didn't want to deal with the fact that I had diabetes. But once I realized that I felt SOOO much better when I did take care and really pay attention to what I was eating and doing to control it, that became my motivator. Not to say that it works all of time, cause it doesn't. I will have bad weeks and even months. No one is perfect. The thing that has helped me the most is knowing that no one is perfect and I will never have perfect control. So I just do the best I can and every once in a while I just need a day or so that I don't care. I know that isn't the best solution probably, but it does help me. maybe it can help you too.

Emma2412
Emma2412 2010-11-12 21:58:28 -0600 Report

Hi, Jralphs — I understand what you're saying totally and am familiar with all of the emtoions you speak of. Right now, however, I'm on my own case for having a bunch of candy this week. I get into these periods where I buy a few things at the store because I'm depressed and all I do is make my BG readings higher and then I get even more depressed and very tired and then I get into the sleeping during the day routine, which is not good since I have my own business. Sometimes, I just work against myself. I haven't been on DC for quite awhile and since I have been getting into a funk again, in Eversinging1's words, I've come back here to get back on track. Talking always helps me get back on track. So, I'm hoping it'll work this time for me, too, especially with the holidays coming up.

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2010-11-05 14:58:22 -0500 Report

Hi!

I really appreciated your honest and I am sure others did too. The emotions you described in the last paragraph of your post are normal for people who are dealing with a chronic condition like diabetes. You're human, and it's hard to stay motivated day after day to manage your diet and lifestyle, especailly when you think you are doing the right thing but not getting results, and wanting to avoid medication but also avoid the potential complications.

I don't know anyone on this discussion board who would yell at you, other than to shout out their words of support.

First, I don't think you are in denial. I just think you are overwhelmed and don't know where to turn.

First, I would recommend not overloading yourself with information but, instead, consulting with a handful of experts who will listen to you, understand your concerns and your preferences, and help you to develop a strategy for managing your diabetes that fits who you are. These individuals should include your doctor (for diabetes and sleep apnea), a diabetes educator, and a dietician, for starters.

Please don't assume how your doctor will decide to treat your diabetes until you talk to him. You won't know the options until you start the conversation.

One of the reasons you are in a funk is that you may just be feeling lost. And that's depressing. So teaming up with some pros could help a lot.

Still, I am concerned about the funk that you are in. It sounds like you really need some support. To have people on your support team, including family and/or friends, who are watching your back? It's really important to have a safe place to talk about how you are feeling with an understanding, non-judgmental listener. Family members can be helpful, or they can be so caught up in their own fear and denial that they aren't able to be very supportive. Support groups, or a few sessions with a mental health professional, can also be invaluable.

Mind, body, and spirit all go hand and hand. The three pillars. When one is out of whack, the others are also affected. So make sure you are taking good care of all three.

Stay in touch with your friends on Diabetic Connect. Please keep us posted on how you are doing! You are on my mind!

Eversinging1
Eversinging1 2010-11-06 23:57:44 -0500 Report

some days the funk is worse than others. I think since I found this site and reading what others are writing and opening up on here, which I haven't been able to share my fears with anyone, has really put me in a funk. Facing this disease that I've been denying. Me and my husband got into a tiff last night and I got in such a funk..just felt like I was worthless and cried and cried. I had cancelled out on a couple of events I had really been looking forward to. Just didn't see any reason to go. This morning I just didn't want to get out of bed. Laid in bed until after noon…just bawling. My husband, Jimmy, (he's the best) always knows the best thing to say. He encouraged me to get up and we went to a foot store and got some new arch supports so hopefully it will make my feet feel better. I found an old antique bike at the side of the house that's just like what I was looking to buy for hundreds of dollars…needs a little restoration but it's an awesome single speed cruiser type bike. Ended up going to one of the events I had cancelled and had a really good time. I really don't allow myself "quiet" time to dwell on what's going on with me. I'm a caretaker..not a patient…it isn't supposed to happen to me. Well, it has and now I'm having to face it and it hurts and I'm angry and I'm scared and overwhelmed. So yes, I'm going to make an appt with my doc Monday and going to call my insurance about getting in to see a nutritionist because I don't know the first thing about eating right. My doc said minimum carbs but I can't live on Atkins. and i don't know what else to eat. So, it is what it is. I am finally willing (begrudingly) to seek the help I need. Control freak that I am, I don't like having to admit I need help, but yes, I'm over my head. I think this site is wonderful.

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2010-11-07 08:21:46 -0600 Report

I am so glad that you followed up with me. I was really concerned when I read your note and was hoping that I might be able to say something helpful.

It is only human nature to hope that by being in denial, and hope that by not dealing with something it willl disappear on its own. By feeling that way, you are in good company -- virtually everyone who has ever received a medical diagnosis. Denial may be temporary for some while, for others, it may go on and on to the point that their health deteriorates out of neglect while they continue to wait for the problem to go away.

Clearlly, that's not you. But giving up the denial opens the floodgate to a lot of other feelings that are not so comfortable -- sadness, fear, anger, disappointment... and on and on. That's probably what you are going through now. It's not fun. In many ways, receiving and acknowledging a medical diagnosis is like experiencing a great loss. Making diet and lifestyle changes, following a medication regimen, means looking at yourself in a different way, and this can feel like a loss of control, and a loss of what you thought the future would be like. So your sadness is in many ways a grieving process, as you feel this loss.

When we experience loss, it's important to allow ourselves to grieve. As you pointed out, feeling a loss of control is a big part of your grief process. Let the feelings come as they come, don't hold back. Feelings can't hurt us, and they only control us when we try to hold them in. And, grief helps our minds to process the diagnosis.

Here are some things you can do to help with the grief. You are already a few steps ahead of me on getting informed and working with your physician. An antidote to fear is facts. So get informed about your condition and what you can do, and team up with your doc on creating a strategy that is a fit with who you are, your unique physical make-up, and your lifestyle.

And get support. It sounds like your husband is watching over you. You are certainly fortunate to have him. I would also encourage you to give yourself an extra push to get out and stay connected with friends and activities you enjoy. You are moving in that direction; keep up the good work.

I would also encourage you to remind yourself, every minute of the day, that you are not "a diabetis." you are a fully-dimensional human being with a past, present and future. Work with your diagnosis, integrate it into who you are, but don't let it define you.

But I have to say: If you continue to feel overwhelmed by your sadness, and don't see a light at the end of the tunnel, and find that your sadnesss is affecting your ability to function in any way, then it is really important to get in touch with a mental health professional. You may be suffering from depression. This condition is also treatable. You might find that a mental health professional could be another important member of your team as you move forward with your treatment.

Thanks again for responding to my post. You are on my mind. And please continue to keep us posted.

jayabee52
jayabee52 2010-11-07 01:54:35 -0600 Report

With a little help Nancy, and a little learning, you can become a "control freak" again, but this time can control your DM rather than being controlled by it.

Decide where it is most important for you start and then go after it at your own pace. Don't think you have to do it all at once

klfrcmom
klfrcmom 2010-11-05 14:01:50 -0500 Report

I have similar motivational issues, please PLEASE believe me I do. Lately, I've related the "maintenance" of diabetes to the way old, antique cars compare to today's models… i.e. gotta turn the crank to start the engine vs. push the buttom or turn the key It sounds totally lame, but somehow, it takes the edge of the resentment and frustration that I feel. I am (we, diabetics, are) a different kind of machine that requires different techniques)…
Do you remember the old SCHOOLHOUSE ROCK "I'm a Machine, You're a Machine. Everybody that you know, you know, they're a machine." :-)
it's just an extension of that… we have "manual transmission" pancreas

dorway
dorway 2010-11-04 20:05:15 -0500 Report

I have a couple questions to ask that you did not mention in your post.

1. Are you drinking diet soda
2. Are you eating foods that contains phenylalanine
3. Are you eating foods that contains MSG

Eversinging1
Eversinging1 2010-11-04 21:07:17 -0500 Report

I'm pretty sure I'm free of the MSG. I know about aspartame and it's in just about every diet food or drink there is. Yes I drink diet pop, trying to cut back.

Harlen
Harlen 2010-11-04 18:50:33 -0500 Report

Hello and welcome
As a chef I know how hared it is when you love good food lol
It take a good bit of work but can be done .
Best wishes
Harlen

Eversinging1
Eversinging1 2010-11-04 21:06:07 -0500 Report

I've just never had to think about what, when, why and how I eat. Gets confusing. Thanks for understanding!

Harlen
Harlen 2010-11-04 22:24:44 -0500 Report

I know what you mean ben there done that
For me I needed to give up the loves of my life bread,pasta.rice but now I can have some just not a lot Like it was.
portion controle was a big thing with me too lol
I didnt get my #'s good right away it was a long and hard trip.
Giving up the things I love slowy it was the only way I way able to do it.
It did get better as time ran on.
Best wishes
Harlen

sNerTs1
sNerTs1 2010-11-04 17:07:00 -0500 Report

I was in denial for about a year after a huge sugar spike on one test. I said "nut uh not me" here's the thing … uh huh its me. I am diabetic. There is one thing that I said right after I decided to believe …

1. This is NOT going to control me, I WILL control it. I own my body.

After that, I took my blood sugars diligently to see what they were after I ate certain foods, how my body reacted to each food. I knew then what I could and what I could not have. Not what someone else told me but what my body told me. We have to listen to our bodies because we each are different. Like so many say, what works for one, wont work for another.

One thing that is very important that I did not see in your note is hydration. Make sure you drink water and lots of it. Water is a natural cleanser for our bodies and helps to flush out the junk. With that and watching my carb intake, I was able to lose weight and get my A1C level down rather quickly.

It also is important for you to get "in tune" with yourself with what your body needs and it will tell you. Whether you do it with meditation, yoga, taking a walk … etc. get into yourself.

Keep us up to date please. I hope you can find something within these writings that help you =)

Eversinging1
Eversinging1 2010-11-04 21:05:13 -0500 Report

That's probably a good idea to check after each meal because I've gotten negative reactions to "good food" and vice versa. I guess I better get diligent about it. I stay dehydrated. I'm always drinking something but water is not my fave drink. I guess I better work on that more seriously too. It's all so hard to change your life like this, as I'm sure you know.

sNerTs1
sNerTs1 2010-11-04 21:30:39 -0500 Report

Yep I know it is, but it isnt impossible. I am very much like you, I hated water so I gradually got myself to drink more and more of it as I took meds or vitamins, then decided one day to just drink more of it. It wasnt so bad. It seriously is all a mind thing, once you can succeed there, you have it made.

Mrs. Alilce
Mrs. Alilce 2010-11-04 16:31:29 -0500 Report

Well, I wish you were here. I am going to a meeting sponsored by a chiropractor to talk about leg pain and foot pain tonight in Type II Diabetics. Hook on as my friend and I can share what I find out.

Eversinging1
Eversinging1 2010-11-04 21:01:18 -0500 Report

Please do!

Mrs. Alilce
Mrs. Alilce 2010-11-08 12:29:53 -0600 Report

I was interested in this meeting because the dr. had some points to make from the cortisol and adrenal glands point of view. Fight or Flight the issue of diabetes and one gradually uses up their resources due to continual stressors. I did agree that any upheaval now hits me harder and takes longer to recover. We parted ways when he wanted us to leave off dairy and wheat. Food allergies cause a large part of the problem also he believes. He also demanded we do just as he says. Get a neurological and metabolic profile. See him regularly even though insurance does not understand not pays on all this. Needless to say I have been ok with balancing the 5 food groups. I will continue my personal research.

Eversinging1
Eversinging1 2010-11-04 15:44:12 -0500 Report

How do you fry a margarita????

CaliKo
CaliKo 2010-11-04 15:51:05 -0500 Report

Quickly, I'm sure. It must start out frozen. Here are the winners from the past few years:
2005 Most Creative Viva Las Vegas Fried Ice Cream
2005 Best Taste Fried PB, Jelly and Banana Sandwich
2006 Most Creative Fried Coke
2006 Best Taste Fried Praline Perfection
2007 Most Creative Deep Fried Latte
2007 Best Taste Texas Fried Cookie Dough
2008 Most Creative Fried Banana Split
2008 Best Taste Chicken Fried Bacon
2009 Most Creative Deep Fried Butter
2009 Best Taste Fernie's Deep Fried Peaches & Cream
2010 Most Creative Fried Beer™
2010 Best Taste Texas Fried FRITOS® Pie

jayabee52
jayabee52 2010-11-04 15:53:47 -0500 Report

Just reading those cause my BG#s to spike! LoL!

Eversinging1
Eversinging1 2010-11-04 21:10:58 -0500 Report

I've heard that smelling food, like bakery goods can make you gain weight. It's kind of like Pavlov's dogs…trained to salivate at the ringing of a bell. We are conditioned to respond as if we've eating what we are smelling. Don't know if it's true or not, but weirder things have happend! lol

Eversinging1
Eversinging1 2010-11-04 15:40:25 -0500 Report

I don't know! America's eating habits are way out of control. That's why so many of us are fat and diabetic. It's thrust in our faces 24/7.

txtugboat
txtugboat 2010-11-06 13:01:09 -0500 Report

this is the only place in the world you can eat a big chicken fried steak mashed potatoes smothered in white gravy and drink a diet drink alot of good that does lmao

jayabee52
jayabee52 2010-11-06 13:10:34 -0500 Report

actually there's studies that the artificial sweetners actually work to put on the pounds rather help keep them off. I had been guzzling diet soda, generally 2 - 2 litre bottle a day. (Who'd a thunk it!)

Now I avoid anything with artificial sweeteners in them. Trying to take lbs off so I drink water or unsweetened coffee & iced tea

txtugboat
txtugboat 2010-11-06 13:28:27 -0500 Report

i really like the crystal light pacs alot because they are convienant for me i drive a truck so it is easier for me

CaliKo
CaliKo 2010-11-04 15:43:13 -0500 Report

The bright spot is that we can learn to be better and bring our children and grandchildren up with better eating habits. Hopefully the next generation will do better, and maybe a cure will even be found soon.

Eversinging1
Eversinging1 2010-11-04 15:23:42 -0500 Report

The Okla. State Fair this year had chocolate covered bacon and a roast beef sundae. The "ice cream" part was mashed potatoes, topped with roast beef and gravy, and a cherry tomato on top. I think the fair should be sponsored by the American Heart Assn cause the food sure isn't healthy!

Eversinging1
Eversinging1 2010-11-04 13:29:24 -0500 Report

I don't know how to eat properly. I'm from the mid-south…Texas and Oklahoma…we eat fried and sweet everything. Well, I used to be able to eat anything and everything and that's how I was raised. Farm folk, small town folk, we just ate. So maybe I should go to the nutritionist or something? I'm really lost in this part of it. I go to the grocery store and check labels and just want to cry. Everything is so high carb, except for the stuff that tastes like cardboard. Very depressing.

Mike56
Mike56 2010-11-11 19:39:27 -0600 Report

been reading this, and just want to say- you have a lot of people supporting you and each other. I am a guy raised on meat and potatoes and lots of sweets, and fast food. I have battled type 2 for several years and my mother died from it a decade ago- she said she couldnt afford the meds, care and food. Well last year I went to my Dr and I knew ahead of time my numbers were going to be bad… but was shocked! my glucose was 255, A1C 9.9. He wanted to put me on meds right away, but I said give me 6 months and I won't need meds. I got testing supplies, andwhat did I do? tested about 3-4 times a month fasting, didn't really change my eating (found every excuse I could come up with) or exercise. Then FINALLY I decided to do something about it! I found a very extreme 3 week diet, lost about 20 pounds, then I was in the prcess of selling my home, sold my exercise machine and gained 1/2 back. Then I decided to test everyday (fasting only though) and found a great LIFESTYLE program on an infomecial- no names here??- but it is the one where you can transform your body in 18 minutes 2 times a week (thats if you only want to do the least). But in 5 weeks I lost about 27 lbs and my blood sugar was down to 112-130 fasting every day. I also found pasta that only has 5 carbs (compared to over 40 for any other kind) to digest. That with ground lean turkey (93% lean ground beef if you prefer) cooked in water, and drained, along with home made sauce (there are good all natural out there/ the home made is wonderful!) makes a truellly delicious, filling, and healthy meal. I also now use a slow cooker and make a bell pepper stew, and chili, that I can't make often enough! The stew, I just made (now that it's getting cooler) last weekend, and shared a sample with a co worker that has 3 kids - all type1 ages 8-13-8 yr old was just diagnosed. Has to do with father and mothers genes- no one but there kids has ever had diabetes. They loved the stew. Instead of soda I drink water, but I often add squeezed lemon (works as a diaretic, and the acdity is good for diabetes I read), or the little sugar free packs of crystal light- cheap per serving, and some good tastes. I do drink diet soda, but limit it usually to 2 -3 20oz bottles per week. I try to eat lots of protein, 3 times a day, veggies, and a couple servings of fruit. I eat 5-6 times a day, and can maintain my weight, when inactive. I should have lost more, but I do cheat, mostly on weekends, and sometime a night during the week, but the rest I follow my eating program, which has lots of variety, and some very good tasting food, that IF I wasn't diabetic, I would never have tried.
Don't worry about not being perfect, just do a little more each week. Set a small goal- one you know you can achieve, and then when you do, a small reward, then another goal, then reward. As time goes on it get's easier -I test 2 times a day and was amazed the first time I di it 2 hrs after mid afternoon snack before dinner and had double digit readings. I was under the mistaking impression that fasting would give the lowest- now I know better!
My goal for next years exam is to be 20 lbs less (I know I can loose 1.5 lbs a month) and my A1C to be 6.5-6.7.
I am doing this for me 1st, and my sons, and will soon be a 1st time grandfather, so it is for her. I plan on being at her wedding in 2-3 decades :^)
Evesinging1, you may not KNOW how to eat properly, but you can work on it and learn it. I am still. I do not believe there is a right way for anyone. All you can do is use guidelines, try different things, and keep the ones that work for you, and you like. I like oatmeal (NEVER did in the past) - has to be 100% whole grain rolled- not instant- with some fresh or frozen bluberries, and some cinnamon. 6 months ago I would have said no way, but that and my 4 egg veggie omlet, gives me fiber, and protein. I do remove 3 of the yolks, because of the cholesterol in them though. I now use water to fluff the eggs instead of milk and use water in the skillet instead of oil or cooking spray (which is oil too). I never thought water worked for that until I read about it.
There are lots of books, recipes, and sites that each can give you some help. YOU pick and choose what works for you.
Lastly- your DR. is the pro. I am just sharing my experience- hope it helps.

txtugboat
txtugboat 2010-11-06 13:07:56 -0500 Report

i went to a nutritionist specialist i did learn alot, but you have to have it in your heart to do what they want you to do or it will never work i know i was raised here in West Texas and we were raised the same way small town country folks, eat what was put on the table and clean your plate was the way for me. now im 50 and still dont like to waste food and have caught myself tell ing my 19 yr old son the same things but i learned that he is his own person and dont like the same things i do…

CaliKo
CaliKo 2010-11-04 15:01:56 -0500 Report

I hear you. Did you see the Fried Frito Pie at the Texas State Fair this year? Or the Fried Margarita? No, I didn't try them. I prefer to have my heart attack in the comfort of my own home, thank you, not the Midway.
Yes, seeing a nutritionist or a dietician is a good idea. Better if they are a Certified Diabetes Educator so they specialize in what you can eat and how your meds and exercise work together with what you eat. Even in Texas we can eat well, get a Calorie King booklet for looking up carbs and stick to less processed foods, like fresh vegetables and fruits, whole grain breads (in moderation), low-fat dairy, nuts, fish, chicken, etc. You don't have to eat anything that tastes like cardboard. Good luck!

Emma2412
Emma2412 2010-11-18 06:41:07 -0600 Report

Hi, CaliKo -
First, just let me say that I love your sense of humor. It's great.
Your suggestion about fresh veggies and fruit, lean meats, fish, chicken are all sound. And I agree with you. Nobody has to eat anything that tastes like cardboard. Whole grain bread is great but I try to keep it at 1 slice a day, or even 1/2 slice. I found whole grain bread by Alvarado St. Bakery (which sells in every supermarket around here.)
My best friend (who is always reading labels) found a pasta that is great for diabetics and she bought some for me. (She knows how I miss pasta.) It's made by Ancient Harvest. It's Quinoa (pronounced Keen-wa) Pasta. It's gluten-free, very low socium, cholesterol free. It's tastes great. See recipes and more info at www.quinoa.net.
Incidentally, I found Organic Whole Grain Quinoa which can be used like rice or as a cereal, almost anyway you want. It's got 2.5g fat, 0 trans fats, 0 Cholesterol, 30g carbs with dietary fiber at 3g, 0 sugars, and 7g protein. It only boosts my BG 2 points. I'm so glad I found this because I love hot cereal.
Have a great day.

CaliKo
CaliKo 2010-11-18 09:02:53 -0600 Report

Thanks, I will look for the quinoa pasta, I have not tried that yet. I have cooked the whole grain quinoa like rice, I like it. We are so lucky these days to have more good products to choose from! You have a great day, too!

Eversinging1
Eversinging1 2010-11-04 13:24:46 -0500 Report

LOL My husband wanted to get the cookie diet thing…and the acai thing. He did get the acai (didn't work for him at all) so now he's all disappointed but still wanting the cookies! This is the 1st time he's ever had to worry about losing weight. He has a pacemaker/defib and his doc told him to lose weight..his 1st attempt. I said "welcome to the real world!" His doc cleared him to do whatever he feels up to doing so we might start riding bikes together. Thats' a start anyway.

Graylin Bee
Graylin Bee 2010-11-05 14:10:11 -0500 Report

Bike riding sounds like an excellent start. If you think of an activity you might enjoy, try it. You are more apt to do something for fun than to do something else that you consider just exercise. My husband hated his hydro therapy and stopped going. I noticed he moved more over a longer period of time doing outside photography. So I made sure and encouraged him to do it. He didn't look at it as exercise even though he kept improving as he got lost in the activity. An added bonus is we enjoy our time together so much more. Even after I explained to him how I had tricked him into more exercise.

jayabee52
jayabee52 2010-11-05 14:55:36 -0500 Report

sometimes we do have to trick ourselves into exercise. Even though I have balance problems I love to dance with a partner. Actually I think my years of going to an east coast swing class has helped improve what I lost in a series of ministrokes in 2005 so that was exercise and PT (?)

I used to ride my bike, A LOT! I loved that too. I'm not sure that I still can ride a bike due to my balance problems. I'll have to borrow someone's bike to see if I can still ride without toppling over and hurting myself.

And grayin, I doin't think you TRICKED your hubby. You just adapted and used what worked for you both. Great going!

jayabee52
jayabee52 2010-11-06 12:43:47 -0500 Report

I wonder if it's like the "sugar push" we were taught in the class. Too bad I'm not closer maybe you could teach it to me. I lived for about 4 years in Sw KS all we had to do was go through the OK panhandle for a bit and we'd be in N TX, but hatt was back in the'80s

CaliKo
CaliKo 2010-11-06 20:04:50 -0500 Report

"Sugar Push" was a teacher's nickname for series of steps commonly taught in the beginners 5-lesson push workshop. It's probably what you learned. Late 80s and early 90s is when I was active in the push world. It's actually how I met my husband.

Graylin Bee
Graylin Bee 2010-11-05 15:33:08 -0500 Report

No he was really surprised when I told him how it seemed to be helping.
Have you looked into the recumbant bikes or the three wheelers. I had been wonderied about them at one time for a couple of different reasons. I had a few years of bad balance issues my self. Also in winter I wonder if the extra wheels might increase stability in ice conditions. I have never tried riding on ice.I seem unsteady enough on it on my own two feet.

Eversinging1
Eversinging1 2010-11-06 23:44:57 -0500 Report

I discovered a bicycle my husband had setting on the side of the house. an old rusty thing. I got to looking at it and it's exactly the type of bike I've been looking at at the bike stores selling for around $700 dollars. The best we can find on the internet it is a 1946 ladies Excelsior made by BF Goodrich. It has a rear rack and a headlight. Needs new tires and seat and needs de-rusting but it's my bike! very exciting.

CaliKo
CaliKo 2010-11-07 11:35:26 -0600 Report

Good for you! I think if I lived in an area friendly to cycling I would enjoy that too. It's good when the form of exercise you chose gives you enjoyment. Good luck!

Eversinging1
Eversinging1 2010-11-07 12:23:02 -0600 Report

our neighborhood is not good for riding in, but we live close to the Oklahoma River, which has been built up with walking/riding trails and boat houses and festival grounds. that's where I'll be doing most of my riding. beautiful scenery, nice and quiet.

CaliKo
CaliKo 2010-11-07 14:22:57 -0600 Report

That sounds lovely. I've turned my walking into a walk-run, but I'm just on sidewalks and streets. I do get to see armadillos, coyotes, owls, rabbits and other animals, though. The jogging is better for me right now than other exercise, because my bone density is not as strong as it should be, so I'm addressing two concerns with one exercise.

jayabee52
jayabee52 2010-11-05 16:28:51 -0500 Report

Actually I had tried a 3 wheeler back in the 1970s when I was doing a lot of 100 mi rides. At that time I really didn't like it because with the 3 wheels it handled differently than a 2 wheel. And with the different handling one had to be going slow to turn safely (or it could flip over - so I was told). And for me at that time (age 19 -21) it was all about going FAST as I could push myself for as far as I could push myself.

I don't remember riding on ice either, but I rode on something was just about as slippery. I was riding with a group in a construction zone and a excavator had just broke a hydraulic hose on a railroad track which crossed at a 45° angle to the road. I was first in that area and turned and warned the others about the hazard and didn't pay attention to MY front wheel. Well the combination of the slippery hydraulic oil and the angle of the track and my inattention to where my wheel was combined and my front wheel slid into the crevasse between the rail and the pavement, and I lost balance and went down - hard. Fortunately no injuriy besides a few scratches.

But now, perhaps I could get used to the handling of the 3-wheeler and should try it again.

Unfortunately my tendency to push myself as hard as I could didn't go away in my 20s. When dancing the east coast swing or a Contra dance (a precursor to square dance and quite vigorous) I would dance every dance at full throttle. Can't do that now anymore either.

RAYT721
RAYT721 2010-11-04 13:07:53 -0500 Report

Hello and welcome to our family / community. While we are here for support, any kind of motivation has to come from within yourself. I can type in all capital letters and nag you to take the action(s) that I think you should take but the ultimate motivation has to come from you. You have seen the progression of diabetes and you know that you should (i didn't say want to) follow the doctor's plan for oral or insulin medication if the diet and exercise is not working for you. I agree to a lower carb diet but I don't agree to a no carb diet but that's just me. I follow my diet, not Atkins or South Beach or the incredible cookie diet that I recent saw advertised. The best diet is the common sense diet that gives you calories, fat, carbs, and everything else. In my opinion, the best place to start is back in your doctor's office with conversation about your readings, your a1c results, and whatever tools, tricks, tips and tests that the doctor needs to help you but you've got to bring with you an open mind that whatever he or she prescribes is for treatment, not punishment. You have made progress and then you lost it. You won't be the first person to be all gung ho for a happier and healthier life and then … deflated like a tire. It's important to pick yourself back up again today rather than tomorrow. The only ways to reach your goals are to set the goals, make them realistic and measurable, and act on them. Without action your goals are simply dreams. I would encourage you to do something today like make a doctor appointment, add a few extra steps to your daily walk, plan some healthier menus, and change a little bit at a time with a routine you can and will stick to rather than expecting a complete transformation overnight or going overkill in one direction or the other. I don't want to sound like a Home Depot commercial but you can do it. We can help. The thing is that we can't do it for you. There's motivation and self-motivation. The keys to your success (or failure) are in your hands. Drive with confidence and determination… and have a map ready to know where you are heading and how to get there.

Eversinging1
Eversinging1 2010-11-04 12:38:23 -0500 Report

I've heard so many negative things about diabetic meds…the side effects and how they can make you gain weight. And yeah, I am a stubborn independent sort and hate to ask for help and will tough things out on my own. I know I'm over my head this time and it's really hard emotionally to admit defeat, and that's what this feels like.

That being said, I'm not giving up. I've been looking at a bicycle to ride. That should be easier on my feet. I've looked through some diabetic receipe books and read lots of stuff on this site and I know it'd be my own d*mn fault if this gets the best of me.

How do you guys deal with the emotional roller coaster? I get so b*tchy and moody and weepy and other times I'm the best person to be around. Sometimes I'll feel really good and check my bs and it'll be 200. Other times I feel crappy and check my bs and it's 116.

Thanks for all the feedback. I'm soaking it all in and learning and slapping myself around a little bit.

dloop
dloop 2010-11-09 04:14:34 -0600 Report

emotional roller coaster is an easy thing to cope with when you do something you really like this might be listening to music drawing, dancing… My way out is helping others - when I have spare time I go to the orphanage and teach them German language for free (My parents are from Germany). When I take care about them I don't have time to whine about my diabetes:@)

kdroberts
kdroberts 2010-11-04 12:45:37 -0500 Report

There's a book called Diabetes Burnout. See if you can get a copy from the library, or you could just buy one. It might help with the emotional side of things.

Metformin is one of the early drugs for diabetes, it can help with weight loss and it has decades of safety studies. The downside to it is it can give you stomach (cramps, sudden trips to the bathroom) issues which are usually OK but for some people they are pretty bad. There is an extended release that helps the majority of people but there are still a small number that can't take it.