What frustrates you when you try to help posters on DC?

By jason123 Latest Reply 2010-10-03 11:42:38 -0500
Started 2010-09-28 23:07:18 -0500

When you see someone posting a question seeking help, what is wrong or missing from their post?

29 replies

jason123 2010-09-29 19:07:24 -0500 Report

What is more frustrating to me was
3. Not only the poster don't tell you his medical condition in the question, you go to his profile, you find this guy has more issues than DM. I swear I saw at least 2 men indicated they have gestational diabetes…How do you give advice for inaccurate medical condition? No one should give advice to those men until their gestational diabetes is CURED…

kdroberts 2010-09-30 12:38:50 -0500 Report

Why would that be inaccurate? It's very possible that they are a caregiver to their wife/girlfriend/sister.

jason123 2010-09-30 13:29:12 -0500 Report

Well, that person did not indicate he/she is a caregiver on either profile or the post. He/she also never responded at all to any suggestions/questions. There is really quite a few possiblities here,
1. a man clicked on gestational diabetes by mistake;
2. a woman indicated she is a man by mistake;
3. a male caregiver to a woman with gestational diabetes, but he also said a few other things that doesn't make sense…

The possibilities goes on and on. I am not gonna take the time to guess what that person's real condition is until he/she take the time to make sense on his/her profile and address questions other asked in order to better helping him…you can respond to a poster like that if you want, but I doubt your advice/suggestions were even going to be read.

Pynetree 2010-09-30 11:36:01 -0500 Report

Jeeze, I guess a guy could suffer from gestational diabetes…my husband swore he had Morning sickness when I was pregnant! LOL! So maybe HE suffers from it because his diabetic, pregnant partner is cranky & mean!! (~.~)

RAYT721 2010-09-29 11:13:56 -0500 Report

For me it's researching potential help for people and the recommending tips, tricks, ideas and suggestions to help people. Then, they do NOTHING. We can suggest menus, resources, tips and much more but if the member who is posting is expecting the diabetes fairy to show up with a wand, it's a waste of their time posting, my time responding and your time reading. There are people who want to take action to better themselves, know how, but choose not to. They cannot be helped. Actions speak louder than words!!!

Kirla 2010-10-03 11:42:38 -0500 Report


When responding to people we are not only responding to the people who have asked the questions but to every one who happens to read the discussion.

I believe that we not only help the ones asking but we are probley helping a lot more than just those who ask questions. So never think of just one person who asked and then ignored your response to the discussion.

I have posted links to my blog and lots of people I was trying to get to read my story never do but then sometimes months later I get people going to my blog reading what I have to say.

A couple of months ago I had a hard time on Dlife from some of the moderators and have made a decision not to help people on Dlife anymore. For this reason I no longer post my link here but every so often I get people going to my blog on comments I made months ago.

Just keep doing what you’re doing and know that maybe your advice was ignored by someone but you may have helped 20 more, who maybe never asked a question. I don’t always agree with everything you say, I do believe you give the best advice you believe you have. Just keep it up and know that there are people out there reading and listening to what your saying and you are probley making a difference in more people’s lives then you think.

Keep researching and posting. This is what we do. Thanks

Pynetree 2010-09-30 11:48:51 -0500 Report

No, I don't expect the Diabetes Fairy to show…Hope they will, but know it's probably not gonna happen…But I can dream!
But seriously your well researched informative answers to post are helping people, maybe not the one it's directed to, but I read a lot more than I ask. And I get and take wonderful advice from here…and it is inspirering. And I am so weak that I really do need the subtle nudge to my conscience. So don't get frustrated thinking no one is getting the message. I get it…it helps…I struggle to stay on point…my actions are wee whispers…not loud …yet!

CaliKo 2010-09-29 11:23:21 -0500 Report

Well, at least with a discussion board you know others can read your response and perhaps be helped with your ideas and suggestions. I'm sure you've helped lots of people.

Richard157 2010-09-29 09:41:30 -0500 Report

I am frustrated by the things that have already been mentioned, and there are a few more I will mention here.

I visit several diabetes sites and frequently enter discussions. Sometimes someone will become very opinionated and disagree with another post. An argument develops and several people become very rude and disrupt the discussion. The original request for help is being ignored and the discussion becomes a battlefield with angry individuals trying to win the battle. Why does this happen? I always stay away from that kind of discussion, and hope the thread will be closed and, perhaps, some of the posts deleted. Some people who enter the argument get so riled up that they are banned from the site. I am always glad to see them go. I have friends who have left sites and never returned when this has happened. I usually stay away for awhile, until things calm down. I have seen this happen on this site, and on the other larger sites that I visit. There is no excuse for that kind of behavior. We are supposed to help each other, and creating or participating in that kind of debate/argument is counterproductive and is damaging to the support group as a whole.

Dev 2010-10-02 16:50:14 -0500 Report

Hi richard, this is off topic a little but which other diabetes sites do you visit? I joined this last year and haven't tried to find others. My husband told me today that there is one on Walgreens. Any sites that are different or useful that I should know of?

david cee
david cee 2010-09-29 11:24:30 -0500 Report

Richard, I hate to say it but this is not unique to diabetes sites. I belong to several photo groups & computer groups and the same thing happens there.
You seem to always have some one be right all the time.

CaliKo 2010-09-29 09:12:42 -0500 Report

I like this question because it works towards improving communications. Maybe we could get some tips added to the page where you begin a discussion…

Harlen 2010-09-29 07:03:52 -0500 Report

The only thing that bugs me even a little is when some one ask the same Q over and over lol
For me I will help any one I can and give support to all even if we dont agree
Best wishes

jason123 2010-09-29 07:02:20 -0500 Report

What had frustrated me was,
1. one liners. 'I need to lower my sugar'…good for you, we all do, but if you can be more specific on how is it you are having a problem doing that, people on DC can better help you..

2. no feedback. Someone asked a question, 30 people responded to help. A week passed, the poster never responded to questions others asked in order to help him better, never let others know how did their suggestions work out for him, not even a 'thank you'…You look into his profile, he registered a week ago, asked one question, and promptly disappeared..

david cee
david cee 2010-09-29 11:28:24 -0500 Report

Or the subject line "HELP". Ok with what. If that is the only thing in the subject I frequently skip over the topic.

Elrond 2010-09-29 06:21:00 -0500 Report

I try to answer some questions when I can and it can become frustrating when important information is missing from the question. Often, he or she fails to mention if we're talking about type 1 or 2 diabetes or the type of medication. Also the type of diet plan their health care provider has recommended. As most experienced diabetics know, there are as many ways to deal with diabetes as there are diabetics. It seems that each of us needs to individualize a plan in order to be completely successful. What we can do is tell a person what works for us and hope it helps them.

jayabee52 2010-09-29 00:23:23 -0500 Report

I don't know, it kinda depends on the poster with the question they ask or the problem they presented.

Guardianstone 2010-09-29 03:24:28 -0500 Report

I have been reading old posts lately. I very confused during a chat and backed up to the beginning and discovered the topic in the beginning has been very different a few posts down the way.
The origanal topic may need an answer, or may just vent the current frustration.
One of my books describes 'NOT ON MY MAP'. What is said cannot be answered because what is interpratited by the brain is not the same as what was said. IT'S NOT ON MY MAP' because it's the wrong map. Nothing to do but try to draw a new one.
Hope this helps.
Guardian stone