I am pissed. I hate living with Type 1. I was diagnosed after my first child, when I was drinking 3 gallons of water at day and lost 15 lbs. I was happy I had been the lowest I have ever been since 6th grade! I went into the doctor they tested my blood sugar and it was 537. He was super concerned, set me up with a diabetic class and someone to communicate with. I went to the class the next day. After the class was done the teacher pulled me aside waited for everyone to leave and then hit me with the news you have to take insulin every day. Every time you eat you have to give yourself a shot. I about fell to the floor. I started out good checking my sugars doing the insulin shots have my A1C at a 5. (Which is the lowest I have ever had!) I am not today at an A1C of 7.5. That is better from 6 months ago when I was at a 9, but still I feel like I never ever want to take my blood sugar. I now have a insulin pump but sometimes I don't even care to give myself insulin. I am pissed because when I had gestaional diabetes when I had my first child and they never every told me. I am pissed at that doctor that never even told me. Sure I was young have my first child senior year of High School, but I still had the choice to know.
Four years ago I was finally diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder and Depression. I feel sometimes I take my diabetes and use it as a tool to slowly die myself off. I want to know if anyone else feels this way. I talked it over with my therapist and she thought it would be a good idea to see if anyone else has ever had that feeling or am I the only one out there? Please help me get out of this rut and not make me feel so alone.
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