By JudiS Latest Reply 2011-01-03 14:10:36 -0600
Started 2010-07-09 13:46:39 -0500

How long does "denial" last?

24 replies

klfrcmom 2010-08-04 11:10:20 -0500 Report

unfortunately, it comes and goes… the initial denial — for me — lasted only a couple weeks… then I got almost militant about "taking charge of my diabetes" —- that wore off in just under a year and denial kicked in and lasted for MONTHS… :-(

JudiS 2010-07-20 17:28:51 -0500 Report

O.K. I am starting to believe that I can do this. For the past few days, I have been perusing all the different "Blogs", discussion's and links. I must say, ~MAYS~ is a Bountiful Font of Information. He's not the only one though. This appears to be a friendly place to learn. Thank you all, who replied. I'll be lurking in the shadows, absorbing like a sponge.

Armourer 2010-07-15 22:44:26 -0500 Report

For me fighting denial has been an "on & off thing" for the last thirteen years. Good luck in the fight. Decide to have the upper hand and make the adjustments. Easier said then done, but hopefully you will get some support to help you through the moments.

Ratsbatuti 2010-07-11 09:35:59 -0500 Report

For me denial lasted about two years. I took my metformin when I remembered and figured it's job was to make me all better. I didn't test and I didn't pay attention to what I ate. I didn't WANT to have diabetes so I decided to ignore it. My wake-up call hit when I had an ALC reading of 8.5 and I noticed a numbness in the sides of my heals. I was also tipping the scales at 261 and my blood pressure was out of control. My stress level was 14 on a scale of 1 - 10. When I left the doctor's office that day I was miserable and hopeless. That was in December of 2009. I decided that I had to do something and it didn't matter if the people around me supported me or not. I started watching my carbs, taking my meds on a strict schedule and started walking — 5,000 a day. My next ALC was 7.0 and I had dropped 15 pounds. My last ALC was 6.5 and all the numbness in my heals is gone. Now I am walking 10,000 - 12,000 a day, riding my bike with my grandson, and this morning my scale said 215.2 — I still have a long way to go but I feel so much better and I am hopeful that I will stay on track.

petals 2010-07-09 22:08:18 -0500 Report

I'm not trying to be mean or anything, but denial will last as long as you let it. You have to take action. I know that you didn't chose to be a diabetic, who does, but you can choose how you handle it. If you don't take care of your diabetes, it will take care of you.

MAYS 2010-07-09 22:16:38 -0500 Report

Well stated (and true) !

Lakeland 2010-07-10 08:11:09 -0500 Report

I agree, I also deal with chronic pain (not diabetes related) & the diabetes is so easy compared to chronic pain, at least I can control diabetes, by eating correctly & walking.

My pain I cannot control except by meds that put me in bed. So 15 doctors later & I'm still seeking more help. My one doctor e-mailed me & said I need to just accept this pain as a way of life.

The blessing with diabetes, is it can be controlled & there are things to watch & do, I use my blood testing as a little game to learn what foods do what to my sugars, so it's become interesting.

My brother is in denial for years, I just don't understand him, he seen my dad lose body parts go to dialysis, my mom just had a toe amputated, We have a history on how harmful this can be, so I'm jumping in & trying to learn what I can, I lost 25 lbs. and not from trying to "diet" but just trying to get my blood sugar numbers controled.

Good luck

petals 2010-07-10 08:55:20 -0500 Report

Do you have fibromyalagia? I have that , so I know about chronic pain. Compared to the pain, diabetes care is alot easier for me to handle.

tkwindham 2010-12-27 05:34:03 -0600 Report

I also have fibromyalagia, and it is really trying. If I take enough narcotics to get rid of the pain, I can't stay awake! I started taking Lyrica, and that has been a God send for me, it takes away about 50% of my pain, narcotics an additonal 30%, so although sleepy, I can manage the pain as long as I stay n top of it. What have you done to live with it? Any good tips?

petals 2011-01-03 14:10:36 -0600 Report

I am glad that Lyrica is working for you. I am taking muscle relaxers, pain meds, and a antidepressant for the pain. The best thing that I have found that works for me, is to pace myself, just do a little each day , like house work. I also have found that walking has helped alot with my leg pain. How about you , any tips? Next month will be 13 years with the fibro.

good queen Bess
good queen Bess 2010-07-09 22:02:53 -0500 Report

For Bes sLawrence denial was for 3 years while I did the tablet urine testing in the early 7)s, why bother when unless it was 5 hours after a meal, the result was always HIGH. Then I got the right doctor (internist) that if he said to stand on my head and gargle peanut butter, I would have. He did more to help me realize my life is only going to get better if I accept and do my best to control diabetes to prevet the many serious die effects better known as complications. I do not have that doctor now and am looking for one who is understanding, supportive, and full of encouragement.

RAYT721 2010-07-09 21:24:48 -0500 Report

There are days that I am still in denial. It's a state of mind not a date on the calendar. Oh, I have gone through the "why me?" question. Was it my parent's fault? my college drinking days? putting those 4-5 teaspoons of sugar in my coffee? was it because of that Halloween candy when I was five??? NO… it's my pancreas at fault so a little beyond my control. Should I give up? NO. I can beat the numbers with better control. I can walk on the treadmill more. I can lose a few more pounds. I can give up natural sugar. I can drink more water. I can force myself to eat breakfast. I can do all kinds of good things… and so can you!!! The days of denial probably won't end but the realities of the disease and complications from the denial is what you need to face more often than not. We have a group of awesome and sincere people who care about you. Keep us posted. I am a PWD (person with determination!!!)

Diane987 2010-07-09 17:39:12 -0500 Report

Hi Judi,

How long have you been in denial or are we talking about someone that you care about? Diabetes is as individual a thing as fingerprints. We may have similar patterns of problems but no two people will experience the exact same thing. At the same time we each have unique life experiences that allows us to handle challenges in different ways. The denial you are referring to will end only when one is ready to handle the challenge. Understand that diabetes does not fight fair. It will not wait until you are ready for the challenge to attack your organs and nerves. It is beating the crap out of you the entire time you are trying to ignore its presence. When you are ready to fight back, we are all here to assist you. Welcome to DC!

Good luck and God Bless,


JudiS 2010-07-09 18:13:14 -0500 Report

For 4 years I have been telling myself that I know whats best for me. Now I look in the mirror and wonder who that person is. Now I am 50. Its time. I am just trying to figure out where and how to start. My Dr prescribes the meds. But really has offered no education. My own hard headedness has not helped any either.

good queen Bess
good queen Bess 2010-07-09 22:07:41 -0500 Report

See if there is a good dietician at your local hospital who is also a certified diabetes educator. (Insurance usually will pay for education to help prevent the more expensive complications down the road). She/He can give you great guidelines on how to start getting back on track. Not all doctors realize education from a CDE is also needed to help one of his diabetic patients.

Elrond 2010-07-09 17:30:16 -0500 Report

Hi Judi,
For me, denial lasted for more than 20 years. Because I'm lazy, please see my post in the thread titled 'i've given up'. It took a catastrophic stroke followed by a heart attack to focus my attention on my diabetes. Some people (myself included) are just hard-headed. Because I'm now unable to work at a 'real' job, I spend a lot of time here, hoping to inspire others to be smarter than I was. I hope I'm doing some good.

JudiS 2010-07-09 18:08:23 -0500 Report

I do not want that to happen. I am stubborn, hopefully not that stubborn. I really dont know where to begin. baby step's I guess.

monkeymama 2010-07-09 16:33:05 -0500 Report

Hello there Judi! In my personal opinion and what I have learned going to college, is "denial" can last a lifetime. For every person that goes through denial, each has their own time when they come to terms and are ready to accept and deal it. At some point, in each one of our lives, we all face it some where. For some individuals, it also depends on what it is. There are also some that may feel they may be in denial and yet be a matter of motivation and strength.

Harlen 2010-07-09 15:25:47 -0500 Report

I have known frends that still are going thrue that and its benn 5 years.When you get down to it you know its not going to go away its not going to get better all by its self
How much damge to you wish to suffer befor you take care of it I have had frends pass out at work ,in there car at home
I lost my mom to her not taking care of her diabetis and I tell you its a bad way to go.
its better to start working on it as soon as you know,Its a long road to get it all down and then it will change on you lol a lot of you out there know what I meen lol.
Best wishes

MAYS 2010-07-09 14:19:46 -0500 Report

Denial ends when acceptance and action begins.
Until then, you are virtually at a stand still, no progression occurs, the same bad, negative, self destructive habits began to rob you of your health and well being.

During this time of uncertain denial, (if it were true denial, you would not be a member here or posting),
get to know what diabetes is and what it does to your body:

Information such as this will help you to release the grasp that denial has on you and help you to move forward towards living a healthier life with diabetes.


JudiS 2010-07-09 17:16:40 -0500 Report

Thank's Mays. I watched the video, plus a few more. I have a lot to learn. Starting with, I am not smarter than diabete's. UGH!

MAYS 2010-07-09 18:34:35 -0500 Report

You are SMARTER than diabetes.
You have the ability to take control and to manage your diabetes.
You must be in control in order to establish control, (a dictator's philosophy).

Awareness, Acceptance and Action are the (3) three key points in managing your diabetes, there will be moments of rebellion, … I WANT IT, NOW !

Change is never accepted without some sort of a fight, but that's common in the life of a diabetic.
It's not easy, you make it easier, knowledge of diabetes and action against it to prevent the effects of the possible complications is essential.

You have unlimited resources at your disposal, utilize them, beginning with the Diabetic Connect Family, that of which you are now a part of, Welcome Home !


LauraS 2010-07-09 13:57:58 -0500 Report

Until you wake up and smell the coffee.

Seriously, denial is in your own mind. You have to accept the fact that you have diabetes and that ONLY YOU (and GOD of course) can control it. There are lots of tools out there to help you cope. I hate having diabetes but I accepted that this happened, it's not my fault, I didn't eat my way to diabetes, I didn't get it cause I didn't take care of myself (these are things I've heard from other people) it happened for many reasons. Actually I'm kind of glad I found out I have diabetes because it explained a lot of things. I was really cranky if I didn't eat regularly. I didn't feel good, I gained a lot of weight even when I watched what I ate and exercised. Being overweight is not always the cause for diabetes but a symptom. Now I'm actually losing weight and my sugar is going down, alibet slowly, but I feel much better and now I know it's not "me" it's "diabetes".

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