Anyone else feel like me?

Ms. Jann
By Ms. Jann Latest Reply 2010-06-06 06:10:34 -0500
Started 2010-05-24 10:00:36 -0500

I am new to Diabetic Connect. I was diagnosed 5/21/08. At first I walked daily and was off the insulin in a month. After about 3 months, the walking was not enough and I was back on insulin. Walking did not last since I am living in Michigan and the cold, snow, and ice are things I hate. I got laid off my job, my husband laid off. No insurance. No money. My sugar went crazy. My husband is still out of work. I found a job but make only 1/3 of what I used to make. I cannot get my sugar levels down. Shots twice a day do not help much. My count this morning when I woke was 256. Now I am also having BP problems. I feel like I just do not care. I cannot keep worrying about it. If it kills me (as it did my sister, brother and father) it just kills me. Is anyone else tired of trying to control their sugar. I cannot afford to eat vegetables every day. They are quite expensive and if I am lucky, I have $30 to $40 every two weeks to buy food for my husband and I. I know others must be going through this too. How are you coping and not just giving up? I am real tired right now.

14 replies

SJR 2010-06-01 11:00:28 -0500 Report

i am new to diabetic connect also.i too am exhausted from trying to exercise,plan meals and control my blood sugar.i feel lilke giving up,but i can't.each day is new,with no mistakes in it.
gratitude ,a spirit of thankfulness helps.we have been given life,the ability to see and breathe to move.acceptance of all the good we have and to give voice to it instead of fighting with our limitations relieves stress and stops the drain on energy that complaining,making excuses and feeding depression cycle us down into . thank god for clean water to drink,for that job that pays what it does and the vegetables, fruits and whole grains that feed everyone's body with life-not just diabetics.
i gave up for a month and i never want to be in that darkness and lostness again.writing down a food plan and an exercise time each day and committing to it got old-but i am not quitting-don't me to keep going by starting again,I'll help you to —my prayers are with you and all of us-who feel like quitting!SharonRuane

Ms. Jann
Ms. Jann 2010-06-03 10:23:41 -0500 Report

Thank you Sharon. I am going to get back on my bike when I get home from work today. Please keep the prayers going up for me. Just got more bad news in the mail yesterday. Enough prayers go up and I keep fighting and things will change. I believe that. Thanks again.

Emma2412 2010-05-26 11:49:35 -0500 Report

It does get stressful dealing with just diabetes all day, every day. But, you poor thing, you've got too much on your shoulders right now. Hang in there. Things have to go up from where you are. They can't get any worse. Come back here often. Most of us have been there, done that. We've all been out of work and terrified, but somehow the things you really need in this life are provided. The garden idea is great because after they're grown, get out your canning equipment (large pot is really the only thing you absolutely need — lol) and put up some of it for the colder months.

alanbossman 2010-05-25 08:38:01 -0500 Report

Hi,Jann and welcome to DC. I am also T2 i was diagnosed 6/24/08. I am retried chrysler worker I also live in Michigan.
I also i am growing my own gardren of vegs. Which helps for our food bill.My wife is on ssd and her income is low but it helps alot. I still have insurance thank God, they cover my insulin,between my wifes drugs and mine and higher co-pays on meds money goes fast.If you need someone to talk to please feel free to talk to me My e-mail is small

Ms. Jann
Ms. Jann 2010-06-01 07:47:43 -0500 Report

Thank you for the support. I am at work now. My computer at home died this weekend so I had no way to escape the four walls around me. I rent a place in Hamtramck and there is not much yard for growing. My husband was called to a temporary job doing security by Metro Airport where Chrysler has some vehicles waiting to be shipped out. He will not receive pay until the first week of July but I am thankful there will be a little extra coming in. My BG was 267 when I woke yesterday but today it was only 162 so I am real happy today. Hopefully it will stay below 200 for a while. Thanks to all of you for the advice and support. Wish I could have visited this place over the weekend. Until I am lucky enough to get a new computer I will only be able to get here occasionally while at work. Hope to be able to get back here soon. God Bless!

imsuzie2 2010-06-06 06:10:34 -0500 Report

Hi Ms Jan

You can always grow your veggies in a planter box or such. Check the net of ideas. I found a site tonite when trying to find out how to get from Baltimore Int'l Airport to Regan national Airport in DC. You can find just about anything on the internet. Good luck.

Two painful feet
Two painful feet 2010-05-24 13:12:56 -0500 Report

Hi! Jann,
Welcom to Diabetic Connect. You will enjoy reading the post and learning how other are coping with some of the things you are going through with their diabetes. I understand what you are going through. As we are going through financial problems are selves. Farmers market are a good place to get the vegies you need and save money. There are churches that have food boxes some free and some for a minamal fee. If you and your husband are eating the samethings you can save money. It's the ready to eat and boxed food that cost to much. We buy veggies, fruits and small amount of meat and 1% milk. We buy turkey burger and with Mrs. Dash on it is very good. If you would like some turkey burger recipes that are good let me know. If you buy sugar free items they are expensive and you have to count the carbs in them also. These are just some ideas that have helped us.

Your Friend

Ms. Jann
Ms. Jann 2010-05-24 14:16:00 -0500 Report

Thank you for you reply. I have been eating turkey burger for quite some time now even before being diagnosed. We go to a local food bank but it is once a month and they really mostly have the things I cannot have or do not want like desserts, pasta and canned juices. Occasionally they have bagged lettuce or canned corn and peas. Thanks again JoAnna!

GabbyPA 2010-05-24 11:50:13 -0500 Report

Hello Ms. Jann,
Welcome to the community. I think that the fact that you joined us means that you are not as ready to give up as you might think. I am glad you're here.

Economic hardships are one of the worst things that can hit anyone with a chronic disease. I too am uninsured, working at a fraction of what I used to make, so I can relate to some of what you are going through. I had fallen this winter into an "I can't deal with it" attitude and when one day I got up to a 447, that was enough to wake me up. My husband went out with his last few bucks and bought me enough salad fixings for a few days. It was very touching to me.

One thing that helps us through the summer is that we have a garden. It doesn't supply everything, but it helps fill the gaps a lot. Fresh is always best and veggies are a better choice in almost all situations. Shop your local farmer's markets. The prices are better and the food is fresher. It may take a little more time, but it is worth it to keep veggies in the house.

There are things we can do if we are willing to ask for help. What we had to do for a while was go to a local food bank run by a church. It offers meat, fruit and vegetables. We had to pay, but it was a fraction of what we would pay at a grocery store. Sometimes we just have to be humble enough to accept the help that is out there. That alone can be depressing and make us want to give up.

So yes, I think we all go through times where it seems too hard to keep going the way we know we should. It is natural to reach those walls. The true test of your character is what you do at the wall.

Ms. Jann
Ms. Jann 2010-05-24 14:22:50 -0500 Report


I know that someone out here understands what I am experiencing and some are going through worse times. The night sweats waking me, the fear of losing my car, the inability to control my glucose levels, etc make it so hard to sleep which increases my stress which does not help the BG levels. Vicious circle. Thanks a bunch for your support and suggestions. I feel rather foolish but I need to express how frustrated and tired I am and most people here will understand. Most people that know me have no idea how depressed and tired I am. I keep it to myself. My husband does not even have a clue. He worries over me enough. And feels guilty since he was laid off his job.
Thanks again. I am thankful to have a job when it comes right down to it and now I am thankful for all of you here.

God Bless,

GabbyPA 2010-05-24 14:34:13 -0500 Report

I can so relate. The same year I was diagnosed with diabetes, we had to file for bankruptcy, it killed me. I lost a lot of my home based business I had built after I was laid of in 2006. I was always a responsible person, had great credit...but my income loss came at a very bad time. We lost our car but tried to keep our home. I felt much relief after the bankruptcy, but the hose then became too much and the constant fret of loosing it hung over our family. It was so hard.

Once I decided to let go, a weight was lifted. Doors opened up for us and we are in a safe place now by the grace of god and friends. We are still loosing our home, but now it is not such a burden to us. We have learned to live well on a lot less. Times are tight, and we are but one hic-up away from being homeless. I don't think about it, keep working as much as I can and we make it some how. Letting go is a trite phrase, but it really does work. Sometimes doors do not open until we let go of the door knob we are holding on to.

I know the extra burden to take care of ourselves and our families is so taxing sometimes. There are still days when I just can't motivate myself to do anything. But that doesn't last too long and for the most part, we are very happy. Living simple means that our joy comes from each other and simple things like a fresh cucumber from the garden or home made jam from the blueberry fields. It sounds a little "Waltonish" but we like it. There is a lot less stress that comes with a simple life.

Ms. Jann
Ms. Jann 2010-05-24 15:22:58 -0500 Report

Wow. We did too. I was diagnosed in May and filed in December. Still cannot keep up with the medical bills though. In order to keep the car had to file Chapter 13 so I have huge monthly payments that leave little to live on now that our income is about 1/4 of what it was when we filed. If I let the car go there will be no way to get the 30+ miles to my job. We already rent and owe back rent so we fortunately do not worry about the house too much. Mainly I want to get my sugar and blood pressure under control. I do not want my husband to have to go through what we went through with my sister and father. My brother went quickly but my sister suffered for almost 2 years and my dad about 14 months. I know what diabetes can do and I am trying so hard not to let it destroy me like that.

GabbyPA 2010-05-25 09:09:33 -0500 Report

There will be a light. Sometimes in the storm it is hard to see, but it is out there. Faint and far away, but if you fix your eyes on it, it will grow. I am always accused of being a Pollyanna, but you know, when you face the kinds of things you are going through, it certainly helps a lot to be that way.

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