Family eating

By DonnaAnn Latest Reply 2016-04-25 13:20:12 -0500
Started 2008-08-08 00:00:04 -0500

I am hoping that this thread will help others who may be running into this problem. so , if any one has run into this and conquered it, please post!
Goal: you want to eat only healthy foods.
Problem: you have a family who does not!
You eat what they eat because it is convient and easy.
Has anyone else run into this? And how did you fix the problem? Did you cook for them and then for you? Did you only eat the veggie portion of the meal? How did you resist temptation of Apple jacks cereal and toasted white bread with 4 table spoons of butter?
I really had a difficult time with this issue. When ever my hubby use to cook, he would sabotage the food with bread crumbs and butter and globs of cheese.
I am sure others have run into this problem. Has any one found a way around it? How can one be a family member and eat right when no one else in the house does and your surrounded by bad food?

24 replies

sparkysmom 2008-10-30 21:32:08 -0500 Report

I am so lucky because my Hubby will eat whatever I put on the table. My MIL complains but eats it anyway. My extended family all tend to make sure there are a few healthy choices at all family gatherings. This year for Thanksgiving we have all agreed to make a healthy meal at the Family Dinner. My friends try to help keep me inline too.

Debe Pendice
Debe Pendice 2008-10-28 23:15:53 -0500 Report

I being the "typical Italian" have been from a huge family I think that live for food. My Mother had 13 brothers and my Father had 5 brothers and a sister. It took 1 week to get the food prepared for the Hoildays and a total of about 30 minutes to eat it. Years ago I don't think any of them tastes what they ate. I think they wanted to taste everything but was clueless what they inhale. Looking back at them days, I just shake my head. Knowing I was a diabetc at age 6 my aunts did not want anything to do with me not eating. It was just a little bit. I would say no. They said you want your aunt to feel bad. What a mind trip they put me through. Now a days we eat healthy. I'm not saying theres no junk on the table. My family is very health conscience and so are my little nieces.

sisson 2008-09-18 13:30:31 -0500 Report

Hi Donna
I was just talking to my husben about that this morning. His cousion had dinner at his home every other Sunday Mexican food and it is hard so I just told my husben that I won't go anymore because I don't want to see people make faces at me intill I can figure something out because I really enjoy going overthere! Penny

Ani 2008-09-18 09:09:29 -0500 Report

I have the same problem. They cook and I have to eat what my family eats so what I do is I ask my mom to please just give me what I could eat and once Im done i go straight to my room so i dont have any seconds.
I know its not right for me to just leave but if I dont it gets hard for me to to say no I don't want anymore.

Lanore 2008-08-25 00:51:46 -0500 Report

Hi Donna,
I am the diabetic in the house and my family pretty much have to eat what I eat or what I don't. That's not to say that we don't have a pizza once in a while or some else like that. I am not an angel by any means…lol.
My Dr has told me to stop eating pasta's, potatoes…ect. So we eat more salad's veg's etc. It was hard for a while and they atill complain…I am the one that pay's not them. I will not cook five differnet meal's. Lanore : )

patti 2008-08-24 04:27:34 -0500 Report

Hi Donna,
In reply to your question I have always cooked healthy even more so when I became diabetic. My kids were taught early on that this is what is for dinner and they had to take a "no thank you bite". If they truly didnt like it they could make a sandwhich. But they had to eat there veggies and fruits. They both eat healthy today still. This is the way I was brought up so I have done the same with my kids. The "no thank you bite" was great, they found they liked alot of different foods that way.

GabbyPA 2008-08-24 13:39:13 -0500 Report

What a cool idea. I am always telling my family that they won't know until they try it, but I like the "no Thankyou bite" Makes it more fun.

Dancehawk 2008-08-10 23:53:10 -0500 Report

Here is a point for the family,
You did not get into the shoes your in by eating healthy you got into the shoes by eating the junk they are still eating.
Yeah it taste good and junk foods hard to kick.
Its fast and easy.
Your allowing them to set themselves up for type 2.
If you are the primary meal maker, make the switch for the family too, tell them no more junk,
If you want cookies do them with whole wheat, oatmeal and splenda.
Alot healthier and the whole family will love.
Be firm.
Remove sugar from there diets. bring in more veggies.
The tough love your doing for them now they will thank you later when they still have there eye site and feet.
Yeah it will be rough, but here is the key you do the shopping you cook the meals your in charge of the kitchen.
Sorry to be so harsh, I just met a woman a few weeks ago, 3 of her kids are type 2 the twins are only 7 years old.
they weigh more then I do, they eat junk drink soda sit around watching tv play video games.
We started working with her family to help them get healthy.
I hate to see whats coming up in our next generation.
We are trying to stop 72million children from becoming diabetics.
We need to start at home.


GabbyPA 2008-08-15 05:10:00 -0500 Report

I have to agree with Dancehawk. I cannot control what my family eats outside the house, but I can control what happens in the house. None of us are in a good place health wise, and I worried about "hurting" feelings or people going hungry becuase they didn't like what was cooked.
What I realized is that I needed to worry about killing my own family with the meals I had been preparing.
I cook very healthy now. I used to before too, but hard economic times and busy schedules made me lead my family in easy, quick and cheap directions. NOT good at all.
We talk and keep open about things. Each of us cooks at least one night a week and the challenge is to make it healthy, not serving corn, potaoes and meat for a meal. Sometimes I just have to eat what I am allowed, but I encourage them to offer choices. Always have a salad on the table so if nothing else, I can eat with the family and have a salad. It usually works. I don't cook special meals unless I know I am cooking one of my favorite things, that no one else really cares for. But I don't do that often. Even now, on my vegitiarian 30 day trial, I cook meat for the family and I just eat the veggie part of it. We all are learning and this is a great way to get them involved.
One thing that I try to do, is take my husband out to eat where he can order what he wants. He has been a trooper thru my learning curve, and there are a lot of nights he doesn't really get a meal, but that is because he is not quite up to the health thing. His issue is his cholesterol and triglycerides, and our new lifestyle will help that too. It has not been a year, and I know eventually it will turn around. He just needs more time.
His daughter is the hardest one to switch. Not that she doesn't care, but mostly just educating her on the importance of good choices and why certain foods wack me and my mom up. She is catching on. I don't know if it will stick, I hope so, because she is headed right down the same path as I did.

morris.js 2008-08-15 07:36:44 -0500 Report

Yes, Dancehawk and Gabby are exactly right. My son and step son eat what I put on the table with very little objections. Primarily, because they are too lazy to cook for themselves..LOL
Seriously, they have seen the various health issues I've gone thru over the years, with open heart surgery, the issues with diabetes, etc., and do not want to experience the same things. They also are witness to the fact that I'm in better health and shape than I have been since my early twenties, (I'll be 56 Monday), and can see what a healthy lifestyle change can do for you.
So, fix the healthy stuff, or let them cook for themselves, (but do not keep junk food readily available for them to fix).

GabbyPA 2008-08-15 12:45:08 -0500 Report

Hear, hear John!
Yep, we get our priorities all out of wack. We are the ones that can die if we don't eat the right things. Our families need to understand that. I am fortunate that I have support. They may not always be thrilled with what we eat for dinner, but there are two other meals during the day where they can make what they want. It is really not a big sacrifice if our heads are on straight.

DonnaAnn 2008-08-23 22:20:15 -0500 Report

remember one thing: parents are more than parents, they are an example! If you eat right and workout, and people compliment you on how well you look, your children will hear it, and they too will notice it. You are truly a shining example to them. children need some one to look up to. who better than a parent!

John Crowley
John Crowley 2008-08-08 04:03:05 -0500 Report

This is not an easy question for us as we still have young kids at home. Sometimes it just seems easier to serve them what they like than to have a nightly battle.

But what has worked best for us has been to try to modify our favorites in healthy ways. Like a typical summer meal might have been bbq'd hamburgers with tater tots. Over the years we've substituted veggie burgers for the beef, whole wheat buns for the buns, and a healthy green salad for the tater tots.

It's not a perfect way to go, but we've had some success and the kids haven't complained … too much :-)

Debe Pendice
Debe Pendice 2008-08-24 22:43:15 -0500 Report

John, How do veggie burgers taste? Always want to try but I don't want to spend money on a package just to throw away. Do they really taste like burgers?

GabbyPA 2008-08-25 11:49:10 -0500 Report

I am not a huge fan of the pre-made veggie burgers, but if you make your own they are great. You can use mushrooms, walnuts, or brown rice, as your base and then add seasonings to get the flavor you want. No, they don't taste like hamburgers. If you don't expect them to, then you are more open to the flavor. I will try to calculate up a recipie and post it here so you can give them a try. They are nice, just don't add ketchup. LOL

John Crowley
John Crowley 2008-08-26 05:48:46 -0500 Report

We love the Morningstar Farms veggie burgers. We find them in the freezer section at the grocery store. Look for the Griller version that is made for the bbq. I prefer the flavor to a real beef burger—seriously. It doesn't necessarily taste like beef, but I love the flavor and the texture. Many veggie burgers just kind of crumble. But the Morningstar Farms have a great meaty texture.

(I promise you that I am not an employee of Morningstar Farms :-) Just sharing something I love.

Anonymous 2016-04-25 13:18:49 -0500 Report

Check the SODIUM LEVEL FOLKS! They reformulated the "burgers" and it is LOWEST IN SODIUM of all "VEGGIE VITTLES"! I LOVE "EM!

Debe Pendice
Debe Pendice 2008-08-26 05:54:49 -0500 Report

John, I will try this and let you know my honest opinion. While I have you here"did you ever try tofu? Did you like it? And if so any special ways to eat it? Thanks

John Crowley
John Crowley 2008-08-26 06:54:46 -0500 Report

I've only tried tofu once and it wasn't my favorite. Texture is very important to me in my food—and tofu didn't do much for me. :-)

GabbyPA 2008-08-26 23:41:50 -0500 Report

I have found that if I put tofu in a caserole or something like that, it is kind of like ricotta cheese and just takes on the flavor of what you are cooking. I am not a fan of it as chunks in my stir fry, but my mom really likes the "crumbles" which are supposed to look kind of like burger. I suppose you could make a burger out of it, if you get the firm kind and grill is with some seasonings...I might just have to try that and see.

Debe Pendice
Debe Pendice 2008-10-31 07:24:51 -0500 Report

I did try the Morningstar veggie burgers you sugested. It took me a while to pick up the package because I didn't think I would like them. To my surprise I did. I will probably try to introduce it into my meal planning more now. Thanks John…

DonnaAnn 2008-08-08 00:03:45 -0500 Report

if you have conquered this problem and buy your own food, could you (please) tell how you manage to keep your food bill low and / or affordable.
I now finally and eating right and excersizing. How? divorce, which I dont recommend. It is a costly way to get fit. but the good side, I can now eat what I want and how. No complaints. How do you get your family members to eat better? I truly hope this thread helps others who have a family and picky eaters.