There eare times when I feel ok about myself even with all my problems and then there are days like today that I feel cursed. I am sitting here writing you all as a way to somehow make me feel better. Diabetes is a very family oriented gift in my family at least. There were 7 of us children of which I am the youngest 5 of us are diagnosed diabetic 2 are not one of the five, my oldest sister has already passed on due to complications of uncontrolled diabetes. I know what complications diabetes can bring to my body. I resolve to do better and I do for a while and then I get to feeling like I'm so tired of this. It is expensive, I can't afford to eat well. Have you ever noticed the things you are not supposed to have are considerably cheaper at the store and the things you know you need are priced right up there with gold. I get tired of watching my bgs the finger pricks several times a day then the shots 4 or five times aday . I make good headway and things start looking ok then this fustration and I blow it. I really blow it! I have been trying for weeks to get things back to last months level, i mean i had the best A1c in years and if you took it now it is probably high again. my recent post about my weight is one of the things bothering me now. I told my dr i might as well give up eat what i want and get rid of the excess weight, nope he wasn't thrilled, but then this is why I'm writing tonight. I hope by voicing or typing what I'm feeling maybe I can regain lost ground and move on. I hope this isn't too depressing. I will overcome because I can do anything through christ who is my strength. I will encourage myself and i know that i will be encouraged by you all as i read your discussions and post. I pray for you all and wish you well.
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