Just a little thing

By jaclyncrystal Latest Reply 2010-02-10 01:15:11 -0600
Started 2010-01-26 18:07:14 -0600

Not really all that important but I have been logging in every day for more than 2 weeks and my total for logs ins remains the same, I think I am here (lol) let me know if I am not here ok, thanks

56 replies

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2010-02-01 15:37:10 -0600 Report

Sorryy—-All of these months I had just posted to what I liked and felt like I could add something, and DID NOT notice that I could also actually RATE the article. Glad someone KNOWS how to run these posts!!! lol, PR

imsuzie2 2010-01-27 03:53:36 -0600 Report

Well, I don't know, it is more of a love/hate thing for me. I love the site, I hate the amount of time I am here, not doing thingd I "SHOULD" be doing. Trying to drop "shoulda, coulda, woulda" from my vocabulary and mind set! LOL S2

cc9 2010-01-27 05:28:04 -0600 Report

lol. suzie. every time you put in shoul, could,would etc, you are going to be putting money into a jar. your grandkids may thank you for very generous xmas gifts.

imsuzie2 2010-01-28 05:34:36 -0600 Report

My grandson is a chocolate Lab! SIGH.

cc9 2010-01-28 10:25:39 -0600 Report

one of my friends has a choc lab too and his name is crispin. I call him crispy kreme. and thats what he and my maltese look like when they play together on the farm. i swear the dogs know they are having a play date.

imsuzie2 2010-01-30 02:42:08 -0600 Report

My "grandson" is Duke. Our son came to visit for a day and a half in early December, and brought Duke. He is a real sweet dog. He is bigger than our black Lab mix, so was a bit leery of Duke, but also my son. By the end of the visit, I think Onyx missed Duke, but he did reconsider our son, and actually gave him a kiss. A first for Onyx where David is concerned. He has always been a bit afraid of David, but watching him with Duke, eased his fear a bit. How nice your dogs can play together. S2

donna13 2010-01-30 07:38:10 -0600 Report

My son just put his dog on Facebook, Rufus Anderson. So I have been friended by a dog. Yes, I accepted.

AddassaMari 2010-01-30 15:31:32 -0600 Report

Rats, my poor brain, I am so slow.. I thought you were talking about human babies, not the four-legged and furred type. Well if they could talk, they would have nice things to say..of course they talk in their own way. We don't have a dog :( But we have a Betta fish ;)

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2010-01-30 17:15:01 -0600 Report

I think some were, but you know us, we can take a word and adapt it to our own personalities! Gotta luv it! hah—PR

jaclyncrystal 2010-01-27 14:09:19 -0600 Report

I think I lost those words a long time ago (lol) I have a t-shirt that my sister bought me, because I get so concerned at times about, eating, exercising etc. T-shirt reads "IT'S ALL ABOUT ME" , ps she has no medical conditions except for being overweight and doing nothing about it, at least I try, and ok yes I do get a little over the top with it but hey it is my life we are talking about. love our site. hugs jackie

cc9 2010-01-28 10:26:36 -0600 Report

it is your life!!!! and your health. you do what you need to do.

imsuzie2 2010-01-30 02:43:48 -0600 Report

As either Dr Laura or Dr Toni Grant (from the 70's) used to say "Take good care of yourself, you deserve it." Sometimes harder to do than it should be, right?

Pam from KCMO
Pam from KCMO 2010-01-30 07:06:28 -0600 Report

That is SO true! Don't know about you, but I'm MUCH harder on myself than I am on other people.

A wise woman friend once told me, "We parent ourselves the way WE were parented." That was a real 'aha' moment. My parents loved us and did their best, but both were the only children of alcoholics. (Can you say, 'co-dependence'???)

The thought that it was really someone else's voice inside my head has really helped. It's my voice now, of course, having learned it from infancy, and is part of the broken record of obsessive thoughts that beat me down sometimes.

They say awareness is the first step toward healing. Over the years, I've started arguing with that broken record. (Okay, this is going to sound weird, but it's almost like an argument inside my head. A new voice has shown up that argues on my behalf. Amazing! Where was it all those years of anxiety and depression? Could it be wisdom DOES come with old age? Sure hope so, cuz I"m there!)

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2010-01-30 11:06:06 -0600 Report

Hey, Pam!!! That sounds like what I have been going thru—-mostly during the past 2 years since my mom died. I can now vent (and HAVE on THIS SITE—one has to be careful of who you talk to) learned that I could be angry with my folks, let it out SOMEHOW—-and still love them and respect them as INDIDVIDUALS, going by what they had been taught, and in the previous generations, it was a different world where men and sex were concerned—-

My first therapist said I NEEDED to cut my apron strings from my mom, (I had always felt the need to protect her, MAKE her happy!!!) Made me MAD as at that time it was like that was the one thing I had given my life to, taking care of my mom after dad left etc—Now I see things better, INDEPENDENTLY—-am in the process of incorportating my OWN thoughts and feelings into my living process and am MUCH HAPPIER!!

Thanks Pam, for another "aha" moment!! Hugs, Pat R

imsuzie2 2010-01-30 20:38:53 -0600 Report

Oh yes, Pam, Pat. I too argue with myself…if those voices were mom, she did a good job, cuz she got sick around the time I was 10 or so…but the right/wrong is in-bedded. Wish the self-esteem was there too. But, this board and therapy is helping me find the inner strength…"aha".

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2010-01-31 01:32:08 -0600 Report

Me too, and just when I was about to give it up!!! All of these years and I am just finding kind folks to relate and compare to—how sweet life can be—OK, sometimes TOO SWEET! haha-_PR

tholz 2010-01-31 01:39:42 -0600 Report

There are many times I have wanted to give up. He just doesnt seem to care. Yes I even threw it all away. My b/s supplies. He got it out for me.Wish he cared. Actions do talk loud. Other nite when to hockey game he opens door and walk in doesnt even hold door for me. Well I said some thing to him. Well he held it open for me tonight. Lets see for how long

imsuzie2 2010-01-31 03:15:01 -0600 Report

Sometimes you just have to TELL your partner/spouse what you want or need…believe it or not. Sometimes they don't realize something that means nothing to them is important to you.

donna13 2010-01-31 09:42:54 -0600 Report

My husband died over 25 years ago, so I have had a lot of time to reflect on our life together. It was a good, loving relationship, but he was passive-aggressive. So if I was angry with him about anything he just denied it, or said he was joking and didn't mean whatever I accused him of. I eventually learned to confront him and make him listen to me. One time I went for about a week w/out talking to him. This finally made him very uncomfortable and he did listen when I told him how I felt. After that I spoke up and didnt let him distract me from the problem. So I really agree with you, you have to tell them how you feel.

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2010-01-31 10:50:23 -0600 Report

Exactly!! TO us it can seem so OBVIOUS, you mean I have to tell him??? Yes, that is just the way it is, and I am finding that it is that way with most men. I used to think that it was all my fault, some way—-what a RELIEF to get out from under that load of GUILT!! Just speak up, it is OK, in fact,essential!!! Pat R

MAYS 2010-01-31 10:57:48 -0600 Report

Men can be unsensative at times, but a Gentleman cradles a woman's sensative feelings delicately as though they were his own !

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2010-01-31 11:04:27 -0600 Report

How sweet! That is how I wanted to feel and believe for years, but that trait is far and few between, unfortunatly!! sigh——Pat R

MAYS 2010-01-31 11:14:00 -0600 Report

Being a Gentleman is something that once taught, is never forgotten and makes you stand out in a crowd and in the heart and the mind of a woman, it's an art that comes from the heart, I have always enjoyed being one.
An old B&W movie ( David Niven,Errol Flynn,etc) brings that spark back as does romantic music when I think that I'm a dinosaur or out of place in time !

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2010-01-31 12:57:29 -0600 Report

Maybe that is why I was such a romanticist, read too many love stories on how IT SHOULD BE! But real life enters, part of my coming out of my deep depression—-there are all kinds of love, some is crude, but a gem is underneath if you scratch and dig for it!

Considering the mind sets of our forefathers, my husband's was from Germany, they were hard working, a bit harsh at times, but sweet underneath—One must be patient and cultivate the best in your partner! And hopefully, there is something there! But maybe not what you EXPECT! —-Pat R

tholz 2010-01-31 22:05:00 -0600 Report

Ya I don't get him at time's. He finally took down the christmas tree. The stuffhe took off last weekend. I was waiting to see how long it took him. I was gone all day. Got home in time to watch the grammys. Found out sat a classmate killed her self 2 fris ago.So i will get meds this week card came in Ya

imsuzie2 2010-02-01 00:09:56 -0600 Report

I used to read those romance books, but finally got sick of the ditsy heroine who couldn't do anything for herself, think for herself and needed to be told how to feel. Now, if the female lead is not a strong woman, I don't read the book.

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2010-02-01 10:17:52 -0600 Report

I know, that was when I was in my early teens, and didn't grow out of that phase till lately! haha—Real life had to slap me up to the side of my face, HARD, to get my attention to CHANGE my thinking and feeling! hah—I knew that I was Hard Headed, but really—-Pat—-I wonder if God gets tired of trying to lead me, when I want to lead, but know not where——-or such—-

Now I prefer autobiography's, history, Fiction got old YEARS AGO—is so sippy-dippy—senseless—-to ME at least! Am now reading a book that our son sent, 5000 Years—-something——of our own history and democracy, the hows and whys of Jefferson Davis etc, is interesting and thought provoking. lol, Pat R

Waltznfool 2010-02-09 12:46:48 -0600 Report


For those who would like to know, there is a book I really recommend: "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" by Dr. John Grey.

He wrote a series of books the talk about the way we think (in general) and "translates" that info to the opposite sex. It really opened my eyes to all the problems I was having with my now ex-wife (hindsight is always 20/20)…yes ladies, it WAS my fault. Just thought I would add my 2 cents.


Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2010-02-09 14:49:51 -0600 Report

I attended a class years ago, put on by our hospital, on communicating! The one thing that stuck with me is—- a person can say "dog", but everyone has a different image/ picture in their mind of different types of dogs, based on their past experiences.

So that is one reason why when one word is said, so many different images can pop up in everyone's minds. Also, some folks are visual, learn by watching, some learn by "doing" and others learn by reading the actual material. Frankly, I need all three at this point in my life! hahaPR

cc9 2010-02-10 01:15:11 -0600 Report

yep an excellent book same as why men have no clue and women need more shoes by pease.

jaclyncrystal 2010-01-26 18:59:09 -0600 Report

thanks John as I said it is just a little insignificant thing, point or no point I will be come back every day. This is a wonderful site. jackie

jayabee52 2010-01-26 21:03:38 -0600 Report

I noticed it too, Jackie but I agree, point or no point, I will be back every day I am able. I think I am addicted! (in a good way, of course) ~James~

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2010-01-26 21:07:58 -0600 Report

I don't pay attention to points—-I just read and comment when I think I have something that might help someone else. Hugs, Pat Roth

AddassaMari 2010-01-27 06:15:29 -0600 Report

I agree it is a wonderful community. Even among my close personal, non-cyber friends with diabetes I don't or can't get the kind of sharing, advice, warmth that is so abundant here. There are some genuinely caring people here. I know personally, I would not take my condition as seriously, despite my knowing all the medical and scientific reasons why I should take it seriously if it was not for the DC Community.

So I am with you, points or no points, I would not trade this community of people for any other.

John Crowley
John CrowleyCA 2010-01-26 18:11:32 -0600 Report

Yeah, we've tried and tried to get that fixed. It's proven to be very difficult because of all the different web browsers.

We really do appreciate you (all of you) visiting often. And we're sorry we can't seem to be able to give you a point for visiting every day. Sometimes it's the little things that really trip up new technology :-)

daniel velazco
daniel velazco 2010-01-26 18:19:29 -0600 Report

Hi John,
I have been having problems with not being notified that someone has added me to their friends list. I only find out when I check my activity. Is there any way to fix this?

imsuzie2 2010-01-31 03:12:40 -0600 Report

John, how is the "Helpful to % of Readers" determined?

John Crowley
John CrowleyCA 2010-02-01 11:05:55 -0600 Report

It's based on the rating from members of the site. You can click on the "Rate Discussion" link that just under the main discussion post to vote whether the discussion was helpful to you or not.

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