Yes I Can! But If Someone Can Help Me It;'s Ok, too.

Cricket Crafter
By Cricket Crafter Latest Reply 2010-01-23 22:53:39 -0600
Started 2010-01-23 11:22:02 -0600

I know that a lot of people are fighting this disease alone, and quite frankly (besides the internet help) I don't know how they do it.
For all of you people managing your health alone: I applaud your courage and sacrifices This is not an easy job. In fact, it is very hard work and time consuming.

People think diabetes is manageable with medication, food and exercise…Not. There is a lot more to it than that. You also have to understand the disease, the numbers, the values of food, everything to even begin helping someone. You have to study the disease, and find what directions you need to take to become healthier, and what can be risks if you do not do things right.
I am not a dumb person, I have the ability to learn, but I am also not a nurse who has learned and dealt with these issues. I have to start from the beginning. Again! For a time, he was pre-diabetic, and had an angioplasty and he became more healthy for quite a while. But, like most people who feel better, than begin to take risks. Sometimes, little risks turn into more and more risks that end up with more severe health damages. That was our case, and now the issue of his health is top prioriety.

First of all you have to have a good support system. If you smoke, you need to stop. If you are addicted to sweets, you need to stop.
You need to be up at certain times to take medications and eat meals regularly and on schedule. It needs to be controlled. Skipping meals does not help you. It makes things worse. It does not allow your body to distribute the proper medications properly and without the proper food, or no food and just medication the levels become erratic and uncontrollable. Not only your mind BUT also you body has to be on schedule.
Everything can spiral out of control in an instant.. How do you do it alone?, without giving up?
I am helping my husband and that is hard enough.
You have to live the same life, give up the same things to really make it work, and I am learning that. And if you need to smoke a couple of cigarettes a day, choose to do it elsewhere, not by him and not in t5he home at all. I did not even think about it this time. When my husbabnd came home from the hospital this time with more serious problems, I just did not even think about smoking, but I have to admit I asked for a little help from a higher power of my own.
The reason I bring all this up is because I have been told that he can take care of himself. That may be true , but I have been doing it for fifteen years now; the family thing, you know. And, I feel that he needs my help. He needs my experience and knowledge for cooking healthy meals.
He needs to have to focus on a mindset to believe he will be well if he does what he needs to do.
He needs our encouragement constantly and reminding at times, because I have always been here for him and he likes me taking care of him. It makes him feel loved and special, and we all need that. He treats me equally with my health situations, he is there for me.
My worse fear is that when he is not at home, that he not stay on schedule. He has done this before when he would go on vacation.

His weakness is a meal he should absolutely not have, Sausage gravy and biscuits, but when he can get it he will. I need to come up with a healthier way of making it. I use turkey sausage, ground or links, I think there a possibilities to alter this meal at home, but no chance of changing it when he visits family and eats it at restaraunts..Have to leave that to him and God.
I guess all and all, for everyone it is a learning experience and a new life commitment that has to be made in order to stay healthy, whether you live alone or with someone. It has to be worked out for the best of your survival. And, it has to be something the people dealing with this and other illness have to want to survive. They have to want to help themselves, even though they know there is someone there to help them.
They have to learn what the caretaker has already learned and be willing to put to use what they have learned.
And most of all, they have to make personal sacrifices. The hardest thing that anyone may have to do is to give up the past as you have known it, to learn a whole new way of living and stick with it, but there is no choice. You can enjoy life and extend it if you make some healthy sacrifices and add some healthy exercise. It does sound simple, but it is not.

5 replies

greeneyedghost 2010-01-23 16:45:59 -0600 Report

Wow… sounds like you have a lot on u. Ive been in your shoes, when I was with my husband I took care of him 110% all the time and as he went thru his heart surgery and our kids and me. Unfortunately, unlike u, I had no support system or help from him. I do know how hard it is tho to take care of myself and others at the same time… I have been a single momma of a teenage daughter and an 8 yr old daughter for 5 yrs. I have a wonderful man in my life now that accepts me as I am and all the ails me and is encouraging to me on how to better care for myself or more like just plain out is concerned and cares and is there for me… something Ive never had, so it's taking some adjusting to, to have someone that cares. For me tho, Ive always been a loner and taken care of myself no matter what, now I just work harder at it, since being diagnosed with diabetes with all the other stuff going on with me.

I so know what you mean about making sacrifices with the rest of the family when dealing with someone else's sickness. My ex was diagnosed with high bp and cholesterol, so I made everyone in the house change their diet and activities. Now… my kids are having to change with me on this diabetes issue. But I know its the best for them too, cuz they are at risk for having it too, especially my youngest, becuz i was gestational diabetic while being pregnant with her. I commend u both for helping each other and agree with u that one has to learn to act on their own tho in taking care of themselves. It is important that they are able to care for themselves while not in the presence of the caregivers.

Good Luck with u and ur hubby and family. Take care. and thank you for sharing your story.


Cricket Crafter
Cricket Crafter 2010-01-23 22:53:39 -0600 Report

Thank you Niki, your story touched me as well. I have always been shy and naive, and had a rough time as a youngster. I too, had been with a man before that could not treat me properly yet I gave all I could with that marriage. However; I, too found someone I really love and it is so worth it for me to just plain keep him healthy so that we have a future together. Maybe a bit selfish, but love is selfish, and we do love each other.
Thanks so much find your kind and heartening words.

Harlen 2010-01-23 11:33:29 -0600 Report

I am just a good ol boy from GA so I know what you mean lol.
I am a retired Chef and I love food lol
We all do what we can it was a good bit of time till I was able to stick to eatting what was right for me and I still have the good stuff from time to time I just dont make a meal of it any more and keep the carbs low
I am on the pump now and that has helped a lot too
Thank you for your post I liked it.
Best wishes

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