I went to the doctor yesterday where I was informed that I am depressed and that is the reason I can not get my sugar levels normal. I suppose I could be. I worry a lot about death and dying and losing loved ones. I cry sometimes for no real legitimate reason. But I don't lie in bed all day. I keep pretty busy. I don't like for my mind to be to unoccupied because it leaves to much room for worry, panic and well…sadness. I told my doctor that I don't feel I am depressed because I don't have a lot of the classic symptoms like sleeping all day. I have lost interest in things I used to enjoy. But like I said I stay busy…depressed people don't stay busy right? They sleep a lot..right? My A1c was 9.6 and the doc said I was killing my self. She said such self destruction is an obvious sign of depression. I'm not trying to self-destruct I just don't know what I am doing with this diabetes. Life is so busy I hardly have time to care for my family much less myself. But my eyes were sort of opened yesterday when the doctor told me I was very sick. I was put on cymbalta for the depression. I see a dietician tomorrow who will help me plan my meals. The doctor told me I may have to look into quitting my job. I don't want to quit work. I have to get better. I have a child that I love. I just am not real sure where to start. My A1c has been above 9 for over a year. But I really don't feel like I'm depressed.
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