Sad Time Ahead..

By BeckyJ Latest Reply 2009-10-28 07:26:44 -0500
Started 2009-10-15 21:52:36 -0500

Well the time has finally come for me to say goodbye. Tomorrow morning we are going to take my Uncle Steven off of life support. For the last 4 years he has been in a nursing home following a series of strokes and brain bleeds. He surrived cancer at 15 but was never completely well after the brain tumors where removed. He had his first stoke on his 38th birthday and went downhill from there. I have watched this incredibly strong man become a virtual ghost before my eyes and my heart has been breaking. A month ago he suffered another severe brain bleed and the Doctors told us that he would not recover. My Aunts have fought these diagnoses until this week and where unwilling to let go. A full panel off Doctors evaluated him and all have concluded that he is officialy in a vegitative state and "unrecoverable". They finally realized that he is truly not here any longer and it is time to let his spirit rest. So…at Noon on Oct.16,2009 we are going to remove the feeding tube and respirator and let him go. At his side will be the people he loves and I pray that he goes in comfort. Today I saw his children as we explained what was coming. His ex-wife at first refused to let them come until the chaplain talked with her. Danny-18, Amber-16, Jacob-13 have suffered the loss of their father for years but will hopefully be at peace with this decision. It has been incredibly difficult for my entire family but especially my Grandparents, in their hearts they know that it is time to let go. Prayers as he goes on to rest with his savior. We have all said goodbye but it will truly be a difficult time.

24 replies

Hinboyz3 2009-10-28 07:26:44 -0500 Report

Im so sorry to hear what your going through, but Im here with the rest of the friends. Your family are in my prayers, be strong and God Bless!!

BeckyJ 2009-10-24 18:29:16 -0500 Report

This is the first time that I have had to sit down at the computer. THANK YOU to everyone for your thoughts and prayers. I truly think that they helped. It has been a difficult week, we had the funeral yesterday at the Jahn Family cemetary near Conway and so many friends and family were there. Steven had always wanted to be near his Grandma and aunts out there so we honored his request. One dissapointment was that only his daughter came. His sons refused. We are praying that in time they will understand what the last few years were like for their Dad and that he DID NOT intentionally abandon them. He is truly at peace now and for all of the family it is a true blessing. We will miss him but knowing that he is out of pain and with his savior is such a relief that the greif that is coming is sure to be less.

Sue Turner
Sue Turner 2009-10-18 12:04:18 -0500 Report

May God Bless you and your family as you go through this time of letting go of your loved one. I know how hard it is as I have had to go through it many times. My heart breaks for you, but my prayers are with you.

Jackie B
Jackie B 2009-10-17 22:43:12 -0500 Report

I lost my father 15 years ago to brain cancer…we knew for a year that he was going to die from this incurable disease but it didn't make it any easier to let him go when the time came…the only thing that helped was knowing that it wasn't "goodbye", only a "see you later, Dad". With time the grief will pass to be followed by wonderful memories and a sence of peace. God bless your family.

KarenH 2009-10-17 18:54:04 -0500 Report

Becky, I am truly sorry to hear about the loss of your Uncle Steven. It sounds like he had many struggles with his health throughout his short life but a fighter he was! May you have comfort in knowing he is in a better place without further pain…Prayers & Hugs, Karen

lipsie 2009-10-17 09:00:07 -0500 Report


My husband and I send our love and prayers out to you and your family during this trying time. I am so sorry it had to be this way but now he may rest in peace! Hugs hun! Tony n Sheila

Jipwhip 2009-10-16 20:45:44 -0500 Report

Sorry to hear about your Uncle Steven, You and your families are in my prayers tonight. Take care and know we are here for you.

katt61569 2009-10-16 18:58:24 -0500 Report

After working in nursing homes for 14 years he will truly be at peace and not have to fight anymore. I know that is a very hard decision to go thru and my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Give the kids each an extra hug they will be needing it over the next few years when special occasions happen and they ask why their dad isn't there anymore like I was when my wedding came and such but will understand he was not himself in that condition and is watching from above even if not there in person.

Harlen 2009-10-16 18:28:44 -0500 Report

I know how hard it is to let somone you love go.I have had to do it and I know the pain your in.
We are here for you.
you are im my prayrs

sweething 2009-10-16 15:37:43 -0500 Report

Sorry you and your family have to go through this. Are the children young. They are the ones to concentrate on. They will need whatever strength you can give them, no matter what their ages. Thoughts are with you.

daniel velazco
daniel velazco 2009-10-16 16:45:19 -0500 Report

I Pray that the good lORD BE WITH YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY and helps to to heal in this time of sorrow. Our prayes are with you and your family.

Darly 2009-10-16 17:04:43 -0500 Report

Dear Becky,
I just came upon this,and,did realize that this has happened today. I am very sorry for your loss,as well as your family and his children. God Bless Steven,he is at peace now in the heavens with God, best place he can be. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family at this time of need. God Bless.


Wendy Mac
Wendy Mac 2009-10-16 15:24:26 -0500 Report

May Gods mercy and grace surround you and your family as you mourn the passing of your uncle and celebrate what a wonderful person he was.

melissaweeks92 2009-10-16 13:21:15 -0500 Report

My heart and prayers go out to you and your family. He is going to a much better place and will not have to suffer any longer.

salmanda 2009-10-16 06:22:23 -0500 Report


I am so sorry that you have had to make this difficult decision, but I hope that you find peace and comfort in your uncle's passing knowing he is in a better place. I am sure he would not want to live that way, or have his family endure his life in that state. You are truly giving him a gift, the last one you can, by allowing his spirit to go on. My thoughts and prayers are with you all.

God Bless,

Debe Pendice
Debe Pendice 2009-10-16 05:46:18 -0500 Report

Prayers going your way. Remember all te good times you share and keep them in your heart. We had to take my Aunt last week off the ventilator. Oh how hard that was. We mourned and then have been enjoying and reminising all the good times we have had. We now have a guardian angel watching over us. I will be praying for your family to heal… Debe

ptsparkle 2009-10-15 23:21:30 -0500 Report

My heart goes out to you and your family. It's always tough to lose someone, especially after a long hard battle. It will in the long term be a blessing for the kids to be there and and have that final closing. Know without a doubt, that tomorrow, or when he passes, he will immediately be in a better place, free from pain, with loved ones surronding him.
Stay strong, and remember the good times.

GabbyPA 2009-10-15 22:27:04 -0500 Report

Our thoughts and prayers are with you and the family. Speically the kids. Letting go is the hard part, we want to hold on so much, but I am glad they have decided to do what they feel is best for him, not for them. That is the hard part too often. It is a shame to loose one so young, but happy memories should be what fill your hearts now.

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