Today is the first day of......

By donnadee Latest Reply 2009-09-20 12:33:40 -0500
Started 2009-09-13 12:20:41 -0500

Today is my first day here,but unfortunately not my first day as a diabetic. I started out with gestatinal diabetes when I was pregnant with my first child 32 yrs ago. The day he was born, no sign of diabetes and the next 2 prenancy I didn't have it though I was monitored closely. It wasn't unitl my mid to late 30's after gaining a lot of weight quiting smoking, that onset diabetes appeared. I was in denial for a long time. Even went back to smoking as any weight loss resulted in better BS (blood sugars) It's more then 12 yrs later. I haven't smoked in 8 yrs. That's the only positive thing to say about my health. I'm a mess. Yoyo dieting, thousands of dollars we don't have on nutritionists, diet programs, gyms. I am an incurable carboholic.

I'm sorry to vent so on my first day, but I'm an emotional wreck. I'm almost a clone of my mother, who smoked, had diabetes (more than likely she had gestational though they didn't check but my sisters weight 10lbs, 11lbs and I topped out the scale at 12lbs, so more than likely diabetes was a factor) She was overweight most of her life and on many medications. That's me. Mom died at 49. I'm 49. Yet I still put carbs in my mouth and overeat. I feel like a fool.

But there must be a glimmer of hope in me as I'm here. Still searching for something that can make a switch go off and give me the strength to do what only I can do.

Thank you for enduring my long post.

23 replies

GabbyPA 2009-09-20 07:55:24 -0500 Report

Today is the first day of.....a change in you!

Yep, you are right, being here shows you still want to make a difference in how you live your life. I was kind of the same way, in that my dad and younger brother both had diabetes way before I did. I even participated in a diabetes prevention study, but did I practice what I was taught, no. I too have been overweight all my life and thought every time I ate that I am just killing myself, but did it anyway.

There is hope! It takes some guts to start it, and to push thru the first few months, but if you just focus on one thing at a time it is not as hard. You quit can do this.

I am a recovering carbaholic too. The best way to overcome it is to empty the house of carbs that make you get out of control. For me, it was sweet things like cookies and salty things like chips. I quit them cold turkey for a while, knowing I would bring them back in once I learned what a serving was. Not what a bowl full was. LOL!!

You will fall down, you will have days when you totally give in. But you will have days when you are so proud of yourself and eventually, you will find that your craving for carbs is very low. I actually had to start adding carbs back, as I got so used to not eating them, but really needed to find a better balance.

I feel fuller now, have lost about 70 pounds and keep on going. I eat a lot of leafy veggies and try to keep my meats lean and less. It is all the same things you have heard before I'm sure. One day, something will kick in, and you will have that light bulb go just might be that day.

donnadee 2009-09-20 12:27:25 -0500 Report

Wow, 70lbs, that's great. Congratulations. Thanks for the response. You are inspiring.

GabbyPA 2009-09-20 12:33:40 -0500 Report

It has been a process and to be honest, I focused on lowering my BG levels, the weight loss was a bi product. Now I work to keep it dropping, slow but dropping is ok with me. I didn't add it on in a year, so loosing it in a few years is okay with me. I still have about 100 pounds to go, but I just keep chipping a way at it. As I do, I know I will have better BG control as well. So I get to be happier and healthier all at the same time. Now if I could just get old age to quit bugging me!! LOL

Jaybea 2009-09-16 22:58:53 -0500 Report

Hi Donnadee:

Are we twins separated at birth? I am also a Type 2 diabetic. Like you I've been prowling around this site reading what others are saying. I finally decided if you could tell others about your difficulties I better step up and get help.

My dad and several of his sisters had Type 2 diabetes. He had to have his leg amputated when he was in his 60's from an infection in his leg. I know the costs of not taking care of yourself.

Like you, I love carbs. I can get through the day o.k. if I keep busy. Night time is my problem. I can't stop eating. Just one more scoop of ice cream or a couple more cookies.

I'd like to learn to eat the foods that are lower in carbs. Brown rice tastes like the box it comes in. Vegetables are o.k. if they masquerade in cheese or some type of camouflage.

There are all these new cookie products out that have only 15 grams of carbs in each little bag. But your only supposed to have one bag for a snack and forget having any milk with your snack. Breyers has a carb smart almond ice cream bar with only 9 carbs. Well since one is good another won't be bad but added to the other carbs I've consumed in the last two hours it's not good.

Reading your posting made me realize there are a lot of people who have the same dfficulty handling their diabetes. Seems to me you've taken a few positive steps already. You're aware you need to change your behavior, you've come to a good place to get help and your posting helped me to join in for the first time, so you've already begun to help someone else. Keep posting so we can all know how your're doing.


momfoo535 2009-09-17 10:22:11 -0500 Report

Today is also my first day of looking around this site. I was so glad to see so many others feeling about carbs as I do. I make it until evening and then after supper but before bed I'm hungry and of course the carbs come out!!!! Even if you eat the healthy carbs it still knocks my numbers crazy. I use medication not insulin, yet. I'm looking for lots of good hints and tips from this site. My daughter is getting married on 10/3 so I'm not doing much watching of my diabetes now. I know that's nothing but an excuse but when the stress starts coming the carbs really flair up. I lost 50 pounds 2 years ago and then had a stroke. I've been able to "find" 40 pounds since. I promised myself I would be down for this wedding but it hasn't happened. I truly have to figure out something!!!!

Thans for listening!

Rebecca-8 2009-09-18 01:13:38 -0500 Report

One more thing.. I asked the Dr. why I wanted to eat everything including the kitchen sink. She asked me what insulin I was on. Well the insulin causes u to be hungry all the time - of which the other Dr. condemned me for while giving me that medication. She switched me to lantus and I take it in the evening with novalog as a sliding scale during the day. Along with exercise and watching my food intake (which never worked before) It helped me in loosing weight and I'm not hungry all the time. And Many of my sweet desires are gone, (except when I go to those Bible Studies and they bring all those cookies) so I now bring celery.

Jaybea 2009-09-19 23:13:00 -0500 Report

Hi MooFoo535:

Read your posting. Don't worry about your weight for the wedding. Your daughter loves you and wants you at the wedding. The best thing you can do is be around a long time for her. She's beginning her marriage, you have a lot of experience, she'll have a lot of questions. Take care of yourself you still have a lot to give your children.

donnadee 2009-09-20 12:25:37 -0500 Report

LOL I think your right, We were separated at birth..Let's keep in touch and work to win this battle. We celebrated my first grandchilds 1st birthday. I want to see a lot more of his birthdays. Since I don't eat in my sleep and I don't like to eat early in the morning, maybe I should just go to bed after dinner and get up early. LOL

2rs 2009-09-16 19:27:33 -0500 Report

Doesn't it make you mad when the inevitable happens, just like you knew it would? When I was diagnosed, I was so fearful that I almost starved myself and lost 10 pounds in 3 weeks. Of course, I gained them back when I started feeling more comfortable with testing & injecting. It's 3 years later and it is still a daily battle, even though I have it in pretty good control. I WAS & still AM a carboholic.
1. Learn to love stone ground grains. Better yet, try to eat as gluten-free as reasonable for you. I've always loved whole grains, so not much of a stretch for me. Try Ezekiel bread, sold frozen at Whole Foods. Of course it's more expensive than Wonder Bread! How much do you value your life??
2. Cut back on anything white - bread, flour, rice, potatoes. Learn to love brown rice & sweet potatoes.
3. Read ingredient labels - AVOID ANYTHING WITH HIGH FRUCTOSE CORN SYRUP. This is a big challenege - I was amazed at how many foods I love that have HFCS. I find that is what makes me crave carbos. Not a problem to eat an entire package of Fig Newtons in one siting. Ditto with Ritz crackers. Ditto with most chips. Guess what they have in common? I can taste HFCS now.
4. Do NOT drink diet soda.
I don't care what the AMA encourages {!}. I have found that even Diet Dr. Pepper will shoot up my reading at least 20 points. Gotta get creative here. If you like lemonade/limeade, squeeze lemon or lime in a big glass of water. And plenty of water to flush your kidneys.

Wow! Now if I could follow my own advice!

Good luck and count your small successes - they DO add up! Remember what Scarlet said. Tomorrow is another day to start anew - don't beat yourself up if you think you've blown it.

donnadee 2009-09-16 20:48:02 -0500 Report

Thanks 2rs. You sound like you really have it together. I know what I'm supposed to do. I just end up doing it the easy way, which is the wrong way. Being tired all the time doesn't help. I know if I can get thru a few days of eating right, the energy level goes up. The diet soda, that is a really hard one. Can't drink alcoholic beverages or full sugar beverages, so why not diet soda. I do drink water but sometimes I just want my diet coke. I've been drinking water diluted light fruit ades (10 calorie or less).
I guess that's a baby step.

2rs 2009-09-17 12:19:39 -0500 Report

thanks for the compliment, but not nearly as together as I should be. Still smoke, even though maybe 1 pack every 2 weeks - much less than I used to. Notice I didn't mention exercise?? hah! Yes, fatigue really makes it allot easier to take the easy way out when it comes to preparing food thats good for you. But you gotta do it - even though it took no effort at all to get yourself into this situation, its gonna take allot of work to get OUT of it…no magic nothing!

Oriana 2009-09-16 14:45:44 -0500 Report

I know diabetes can be very frustrating at times. This too is my first time here. I was diagnosed with Type II, a year ago and it seems as if I am still spinning! Hang in there

KarenH 2009-09-15 13:37:25 -0500 Report

Welcome to the site! You will find so many helpful people here. Boy do I understand yoyo dieting. I don't always have a lot of willpower but I try to take one day at a time and just make better choices. So when I mess up and I do, I just try to do better the next day. Vent any time you want…that's what we are here for…Karen

hbkunkel 2009-09-13 18:12:31 -0500 Report

If any one hear doesn't claim to be a carboholic they are fooling themselves. Welcome and we are glad to have you:). Just remember one thing, the more carbs we eat the more our bodies crave them and it is a very difficult situation to overcome. Start here by looking at the recipes and you will find a great deal of help with diabetic friendly ones. Keep venting and we will answer. Have a great day.

hbkunkel 2009-09-13 18:12:31 -0500 Report

If any one hear doesn't claim to be a carboholic they are fooling themselves. Welcome and we are glad to have you:). Just remember one thing, the more carbs we eat the more our bodies crave them and it is a very difficult situation to overcome. Start here by looking at the recipes and you will find a great deal of help with diabetic friendly ones. Keep venting and we will answer. Have a great day.

Harlen 2009-09-13 17:31:27 -0500 Report

Did you read my prophile ?????
LOL I am a carb aholik too but we can work on it I have done pritty good as of late.And I some tricks that may help I love carbs and bread it my bigest weaknes
Hard to cut so its a slow weanning off the bad and slow intro to the good
we are here to help
keep in tuch we can shair info

donnadee 2009-09-13 18:05:49 -0500 Report

Thanks Harlen. It's tough being a carboholic. And $$$$ wise, it's cheaper, more available. The healthy stuff is really expensive. Not convenient. Extra time in the morning trying to pack it all up for work. It doesn't store or travel well. I guess that's why it's hard to make a good habit and easy to break a good habit. But we have to keep trying. Any tricks that would help would be sooo welcome. Thanks again.

Jipwhip 2009-09-13 16:57:21 -0500 Report

Welcome Donnadee you have come to the right place. Howl(vent) all you want it helps. Just start with a small step and work your way up. Go to your local library and check out books on diabetes. They have all kinds of information you can use. As well as being here does also. So look around and visit and ask any questions that come to mind. As for that switch you have already flicked it off by coming here.

donnadee 2009-09-13 17:40:49 -0500 Report

Thank you so much for the welcome and encouraging words. It's hard to read the books when you know you don't want to do what they tell you, you NEED to do. I have to really stop giving in to my weaknesses. Thanks again.

Ginger68 2009-09-13 15:40:24 -0500 Report

wow, you sound just like me, i am also new here, and i've always felt alone with this disease, like i was the only one going through this, i did quit smoking for 2 years but gained so much weight, people making coments about it, that i just said the hell with it and i started smoking again to loose the weight, i'm sorry that i did, doctors are telling me that i have to quit, which i know, but it's not easy and i also love all the carbs. we just cant win. LoL

donnadee 2009-09-13 17:38:46 -0500 Report

It is a constant battle. I feel ashamed when I'm feeling sorry for myself, when others, including children, have much heavier crosses to bear. But it's hard regardless.
Thanks for the reponse. I guess we just can't give up.

caragypsy 2009-09-13 12:48:40 -0500 Report

I am so glad you found this is as there are a lot of wonderful people here and a lot of very good information. Cara

donnadee 2009-09-13 17:37:04 -0500 Report

Thanks for the reply. I have been cruising around the site and must admit have come across some encouring information and also see that others are having the same issues.