Death is Horrible on my Numbers

By GabbyPA Latest Reply 2018-03-16 09:00:38 -0500
Started 2018-02-23 14:15:56 -0600

Less than two years after loosing my husband, I just lost my mom. I have been here with her since Thanksgiving and she finally departed Feb 19. My body is a mess, my numbers are a mess, even worse than with my husband.

I have been eating pretty well actually, but I guess it's just the stress and no sleep but man, you would think my body would adapt to the situation after so long. It always seems to adapt to everything else I throw at it. LOL

I am sorry I have not been on here as much as usual, but soon I will get back to normal. I hope anyway. Thanks to Deb who is out here in AZ and a member here. We have gotten together a couple of times and she has helped me greatly, just by laughter and chat. I also have so many of you who I write to off the site that have been there for me. I know it's just temporary, but I will be so glad to get back home, sleep in my bed and get back on board with everything.

24 replies

VickyK 2018-03-16 09:00:38 -0500 Report

Gabby .. sending prayers for you and your family the lose of any family is devastating but the loss of a mom ..your first friend in life is extremely stressful.. and when you also health issues it isn’t any easier .. I lost my mom 5 years ago .. it sure is a roller coaster of emotions that’s for sure .. I can’t say it will get easier but when you will get back into your routine it will help .. I know something that has gotten me through missing my mom is she’s with me everyday she’s in the eyes of my children my nieces and grandchildren. My brother .. and she will always live through us .. may god bless u and give you comfort and peace ..

WASHED OUT 2018-03-13 18:03:25 -0500 Report

So sorry Gabby that things have been so rough for you. As we all know stress can induce many problems for those of us who have diabetes. It is good to see that you are still here and still checking in. I have not posted much in a long while but things are still doing great with my LCHF diet change. Now if I can just quit falling and injuring things all would be great. Gonna have to have another knee surgery due to a fall on the Ice. You have my thoughts and prayers my friend trying to send good vibes your way. You are a trooper and know the right things to do so we won't go thru them again. It is good to see you are still here among our lovely group.

cmr55 2018-03-11 17:16:27 -0500 Report

Oh Gabby so sorry for your loss. I lost my mom almost 3 years ago so I can relate and feel your pain. Stress always messes up my BS. I took care of my mom for 10 years. Big Hug It will take time but you will get BS back in control take all the time you need to grieve

Consueloj 2018-03-05 14:10:21 -0600 Report

Hi Gabby - sorry I could not offer you my condolences earlier! Password issues.
Iam so sorry for your loss! Emotional upheavals do play havoc and I dont know how to get around that. I do know that the comfort and companionship you gave to your mother at such a crucial time - is hard but a gift to her in her final days on this earth.
Big hugs to you!

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2018-03-01 22:19:47 -0600 Report

Gabby, I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I really am. Life is never the same when you don't have your mom anymore. I think that grief affects each of us in our own unique ways, physically and mentally. A loss begins a new chapter in life, and we go through a transition process. Sounds like you are taking good care of yourself, that's important. But I know I am preaching to the choir here. Again, so sorry about your mom. I lost mine in 2010. As children, losing our moms is one of our greatest fears. You are dealing with a lot. I am glad you are getting support. I hope you are able to get back home soon. There is a lot to be said for having a day-to-day routine, when something like this happens, that can be really healing. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers, my friend.

MaccaMom54 2018-02-28 19:32:52 -0600 Report

I have a family history of diabetes so I am trying to help my husband with his diabetes as well as myself. He doesn't like a lot of fruit or vegetables and I like fruit or vegetables but have digestive issues from other health problems. Trying to control my weight and get healthier lifestyle.

MrsCDogg 2018-02-27 11:06:49 -0600 Report

I remember when my mom passed away in 2007. It took me about a year to get back to something that seemed like normal. I feel for you. It's never easy to lose someone you love.

Suzy24 2018-02-25 07:09:22 -0600 Report

Gabby - You have my sincere condolences. I can relater 150%!!! I lost my aunt on Feb.19th and my dad suddenly the month before. I tried hard to keep meals etc. on a regular schedule but that didn't always happen with running back & forth to the hospital, nursing home, funeral homes, banks & attorney. Even though they are gone, the things you have to deal with afterward are stressful too. Even though I think I've handled it well, my BS tells me that I've internalized just as much if not more than I've showed outwardly.

My BS started on a roller coaster ride but I've got it back to a merry-go-round level this weekend. I'm sure the roller coaster will return.
I've concentrated on lowering my carbs even more and increasing protein along with good fats. I'm not perfect! Peanut butter on celery sticks in a baggie became my savior when I wasn't able to or forgot to eat a meal on time. Yesterday I messed up big time. Ate breakfast before a meeting at my dad's house with auctioneers. Didn't bring my baggie with me since I thought I'd be done by noon. WRONG - it was after 3 p.m. and I was getting shaky. Stopped at a grocery store on the way home and found some cheese samples! Just enough to get me settled until I could get a meal.

Be resourceful - I know you are from reading your posts! Take some time to put your feet up. Hot showers do wonders for stress relief:) Our bodies are so fickle sometimes LOL! Hugs!!!

GabbyPA 2018-02-25 22:14:03 -0600 Report

Yes, today was a hiking day. I just got away from everything. Did 3 different trails and it really helped me clear things out.
I am sorry that you lost two so close. I could not even imagine. One at a time is all I think I could handle. 2016 was multiples, but I did not know two of them very well, but my step-son suffered great loss that year. He is remarkable in how he handled it.
It is good to just talk about it, hear the encouragements from everyone and know that I am not alone. We will get through it.

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2018-02-24 20:19:54 -0600 Report

My dear friend, I am so sorry for your loss. I wasn't diabetic when my parents died which I am glad of because I would not have been able to take care of that and everything else.

Like me you have an angel smiling down on you everyday.

GabbyPA 2018-02-25 22:17:06 -0600 Report

Thank you,
When I lost my dad I was not diabetic and I was also a lot younger. It is a mastery I do not know if I will ever really figure out.

It is true, I do have several angels watching over me now. That part is a comfort and relief.

BB42 2018-02-24 11:13:17 -0600 Report

And that you will do. I posted something similar a few years ago and your response certainly helped me cope. My sympathies and thoughts are with you and your body and numbers will return

GabbyPA 2018-02-25 22:18:17 -0600 Report

It is funny how we have words to console others, but when it comes to our own situation, they fade. I am glad I was able to help and I am very glad you are here and I thank you for your kind words.

Luis65 2018-02-24 09:21:21 -0600 Report

There are no real words- I'm sorry for the loss of your mother, is not adequate but please know that I understand having buried my mother and dad. Take a little time to just breath and let go. Mom would approve. My prayers are with you.

GabbyPA 2018-02-25 22:20:30 -0600 Report

Yes, mom would approve. I shared one of my hikes with her today. Well, I did share all three, but mostly there was one I know she would have enjoyed. Hiking helps me so much and now that I did that, I have one more to do where I will spread some ashes on her favorite mountain out here. I am eager for home though, and a normal routine.

msann 2018-02-24 09:10:26 -0600 Report

sorry to hear about your om Gabby stress is a killer dealing with my mom bad health since last february but Jan 8 she had me so stressed out we were in emergency room for 12 hours i thought i was having hard attack i went to doctor for regular checkup the next week and he told me if i dont take care of myself i will be in the bed or dead so i stepped back and now my bsl is so much beetter i am praying for you take care of yourself

GabbyPA 2018-02-25 22:08:56 -0600 Report

Wow, that is rough and a good reminder. I know in my head I have to take care of myself too, but it can be hard.

Type1Lou 2018-02-24 08:35:00 -0600 Report

I am so sorry to hear of your loss Gabby. It is never easy losing a loved one, as you well know. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

GabbyPA 2018-02-25 22:21:42 -0600 Report

I know you are familiar with the caregiver part of loosing a loved one. It is hard to switch gears to being a self - caregiver. How do you refocus that energy to being self-help?

Type1Lou 2018-02-26 08:13:41 -0600 Report

My Mom died in 2005 but there's still a hole in my heart. I feel blessed that she was with me as long as she was and no one will love me as unconditionally as she did. I remember her for inspiring me to be the best that I can be and I aspire to be as accepting as she was. Every day is a new day with new opportunities…it does get easier with time.

Pegsy 2018-02-23 21:29:13 -0600 Report

I'm so sorry for your loss Gabby, big hug to you. Your stress has been extreme. Give your emotions and your body time to recover. Pamper yourself as much as possible.

GabbyPA 2018-02-25 22:24:09 -0600 Report

Thanks for the hug.
I pampered with a movie the other night (Greatest Showman, you really should see if you get a chance, it's amazing), and today with being outside on mountain trails which is my go to for release. I needed that for a long time and I didn't feel guilty one bit. Which is unusual for me.

suecsdy 2018-02-23 17:32:51 -0600 Report

Sorry to hear about your Mom. It's hard. My A1c was up last time and I think it was all the stress at the time. Mom's funeral, new drs, new tests. I hope this time will be better. Glad you had a member there to help you out. I had my sisters to share with. It was a big help. Sending prayers and good thoughts for you and your Mom. Take care, Gabby.

GabbyPA 2018-02-25 22:25:50 -0600 Report

Thank you for your thoughts and prayers.
Yes, I find that even though I took care of most of her affairs while she was still alive, there is still so much to do and all of it triggers weird moments. Tomorrow I go to pick up her ashes, that could go either way. I will find out. At least I have my cousin to go with me, and that will be a big help.