A death in the family

By Judimar Latest Reply 2009-09-07 04:53:36 -0500
Started 2009-09-02 23:32:54 -0500

Hi guys and girls,

Today I received a call from Eric's (my husband) great aunt. She informed me that his uncle Steve passed away. Steve has been fighting colon cancer and was recently diagnosised with a brain tumor a couple months ago. He passed away in his sleep this afternoon.

Steve was a wonderful and loving man who did everything right. He was fit and never smoke or drank so his being diagnosised with cancer two years ago was a shock to him and everyone else in his life. I feel honored and priveleged that I knew him and that he so willingly and lovingly welcomed me into his family. His parents are ailing as well. Grandmother Betty lost first her daughter and now has to bury her son… my heart is heavy for this beautiful, wonderful women.

Please keep Grandmother Betty and Pa Ray in your prayers as well as Steve's wife, Maryanne.

Thank you for reading this. I realize that my post is probably rambling and my tribute to Steve is probably out of place… but I felt the need to share, yet words seem to escape me. I feel as if a light has gone out in my world. God bless and keep you Steve… as long as I live you will live on in my heart.

19 replies

2009-09-04 08:14:27 -0500 Report

I am so sorry to hear of the death in your family. My thoughts and prayers are with you and the rest of your family.

Judimar 2009-09-06 22:56:16 -0500 Report

Thank you all for your prayers, kind words and support. I have been spending the weekend with my sisters and niece who came in to surprise Margaret. The majority of my guests will be leaving tomorrow.

Steve's memorial will be Wednesday. We will probably head up the evening before. I am considering writing a poem or something for the service.

Once again! Thank you for everything!!!



Vicrgreen 2009-09-03 23:34:59 -0500 Report

You know right now this is especially hard for his wife but she has friends and family around her helping and encouraging. Keep in mind that in 6 months to a year, if things go as they normally do, that extra support will go away and return to their normal lives. Your support and help will be especially needed then.

The overpowering grief does eventually become bearable but it is the things that sneak up on you a way down the road that can leave you devastated. My husband died 11 years ago and every once in a while something will happen and I'll think, "I need to remember to tell Randy about this, or show him that article, or some such thing" and it is a new hit all over again for a few minutes.

My Dad has been gone for over 40 years and Mom says it still happens to her, too.

Nothing is ever simple. And death of a loved one certainly comes under that heading. Your Uncle was fortunate in his family. You obviously all cared greatly about him. You were blessed to have him in your lives but he also was blessed to have you in his.

God bless you and keep you through this time of trouble.

imsuzie2 2009-09-04 01:31:06 -0500 Report

Judi, so sorry for the loss of "Uncle Steve". I can see lots of love coming you way, please add mine. If there is a blessing it is that Uncle Steve touched so many lives and was fortunate enough to pass quietly in his sleep. Please hug Grandmother Betty, her grief must be over-whelming, losing a second child. Our prayers to Maryanne as well, and to you, Eric, and the rest of the family. S2

imsuzie2 2009-09-07 04:53:36 -0500 Report

Judi, I think you will feel better if you write something, even if you don't read it. I wrote a good-bye letter to my daddy 2 years ago, but couldn't read it. One of my sis-in-laws did it for me. Special hugs to you, Eric and the family S2

Judimar 2009-09-03 22:45:58 -0500 Report

Thank you all for the support and well wishes. I showed my husband the thread and he smiled.

Grandmother Betty is taking this really hard. I spoke to her tonight and she was trying to be strong but I could hear the tears in her voice. Her greatest fear when Steve was diagnosised with colon cancer was that she would survive him.

I haven't contacted Maryanne his wife because I want to give her space and time. I know she went to the funeral home today to look into arrangements but we haven't heard anything for her… I can not even begin to fathom what she is going through right now. All they had was each other.

Thank you once again for your prayers and support. It means more to me then words can ever express.



2catty 2009-09-03 14:44:38 -0500 Report

Do you see how you remember Steve? He must of been a wonderful man. We should all be remembered in a loving way. It is the truly caring and loving people that makes this life worth living. This world was a little better by uncle Steve. And his memory will always live on because of it.

salmanda 2009-09-03 15:42:46 -0500 Report

I am so sorry to hear of your loss. It is always hard to lose someone we love, and sharing with others is part of the grieving process. Your heartfelt message will give others the courage to put "voice" to their grief. Although it is hard to conceive for many people, dying is a celebration…a celebration of a life well lived as well as the life to come. I pray that you and your family will find comfort in your memories of this special uncle, son, and brother.

Darly 2009-09-03 15:48:22 -0500 Report

Judi, I am so sorry for you & your husbands loss. You & your family will be in my prayers. Thank you for sharing about your uncle Steve,he sounds like a great guy!!!

God Bless,


Vicrgreen 2009-09-03 14:32:08 -0500 Report

My condolences to you and the rest of your family, and his by extension. Loses like that are always hard to bear and one of the hardest things is that for years after you find yourself thinking I must remember this or that to share it with the one you lost and then being brought up suddenly with the memory that they are no longer there to share with.

May God keep you all in his hands and help you with the grief you must be feeling.

My prayers go with you all.

beadmom 2009-09-03 13:49:03 -0500 Report

Not out of place at all. This is place where we celebrate life and learn to make a better one for ourselves and our friends.

No reason not to celebrate the life of Steve as well!

Yeahhhh Steve! Thanks for being a great guy and making the world a better place. Glad you got to go peacefully in your sleep. Here's to you!

People Are Crazy-Billy Currington



DiabetesDiva 2009-09-03 12:07:26 -0500 Report

Thank you for sharing this beautiful story of Uncle Steve.
Loss is always difficult and I believe sharing your pain here is part of the grieving process. I am so sorry for you and your family.

Take care. Kate

Turtle 2009-09-02 23:49:54 -0500 Report

I am sorry to hear of your loss. I do not think it is out of place to pay tribute to Steve here. My prayers are with you and your family.