Newly Diagnosed and Feeling Alone

By DaniJT Latest Reply 2017-05-24 11:15:28 -0500
Started 2017-04-11 17:39:59 -0500

Hello everyone! I was recently diagnosed in January of this year and it has been hard. My first A1C came back at 6.5% and I was prescribed Trulicity (samples) but when I tried to get it filled at the pharmacy my insurance refused to cover it so I was prescribed Farxiga. Ever since I was prescribed I just don't feel like myself anymore - the slow healing, the extra dry skin, body aches and pains, the blood sugar spikes - along with high blood pressure, the stress of my job, anxiety and depression of home and no support from my family or friends has really taken a toll on my body and mind. I just try to take it all in stride one day at a time since I don't know what else to do.

12 replies

Stuart1966 2017-05-24 11:15:28 -0500 Report

What you are doing, one day at a time, is what most of us do in some form or another. I am a T1, and been that way I will soon be entitled to one of the big
shiny JOSLIN Medals (for diabetes).

This is new, brand new stuff., If you weren't overwhelmed, stressed out just a little, myself Id say there was something else far more wrong with you than your D !!!

It must not start every sentence, it must not start every breath, diabetes is literally only one piece of who and what you are. An important piece, one you will come to understand with time… but for right now its a brand new relationship, and you're on you first months of "dating".

Try putting things into buckets… if you try and juggle all of it, at once, you're gonna drop a bunch of things, and get real messy because of it. What you describe is extremely common. Find the person in your area with the most experience you can get… make an appointment and talk to them face to face.
Doctor, CDE, Endo… whomever.

Does not sound like any of it per se is the diabetes meds, but your brand new awareness (hyper-awareness ???) of the new possible monsters under your bed. Aches and pains, not typically diabetes that I know of… just life. Dry skin, yup ok, could be the D, but easily fixed, nothing to make yourself frightened about. You had it before you were diagnosed right? Now you have an idea where it probably is coming from. Easily fixed…

Slow healing yup by product of diabetes frequently, but based solely on the A1C you've got… a snapshot of a single second in time mind you… might not be the diabetes per se, could be we're not 15 anymore. Sometimes healing takes a little while. Don't make that the diabetes monster, until someone tells you it is… A LOT. And even if they tell you daily… hey if you're healing, YOURE HEALING… so don't make yourself miserable about it.

You will heal slow speech is offered often, does NOT mean anything bad, until it becomes gangrene, or ulcers. You are not your uncle nor your grandmother. You wont have their disease… you, yours is different, except for the same name.

Don't wind yourself up, unless you must… feeding our monsters only gives them strength. You will be fine, we all are…

Corrie Jo
Corrie Jo 2017-05-14 17:53:27 -0500 Report

Welcome to a soft place to fall. I experienced a lot of the same emotions when I was diagnosed last September— depression, not understanding how to eat/medicate, lack of family support (my father yelled at me) . . . It's going to be okay. Something that helped me was finding a diabetes educator and classes. I went to those for six months. They really helped me get my life in order so I could fight this disease. A few things that have helped? Exercise 1 hour a day at least 5 days a week or more (it can just be walking, even). Eat 170 carbs max per day, 30 to 45 or less per meal. (The lower the carbs overall, the better—that is just max #s. It is a place to start. Many on this website do much better than that—Hooray :0)!! My Fitness Pal app is a lifesaver—it's free too.) Fasting each night 7 to 7. Taking appropriate meds. Best wishes. A little at a time and you'll get it. At first, I had this whole big clipboard with a checklist for each day. Now, I just know what to do . . .

Stuart1966 2017-05-09 16:58:10 -0500 Report

Lets try something basic, what is causing you the biggest trouble(s)? Finding the words will help. Very confident, one or two of us are definitely there too.

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2017-04-19 11:46:18 -0500 Report

Hi Dani welcome to the group. At 6.5 you are doing good. You won't feel like yourself until your body adjusts to the medication and you get control of the blood sugar spikes.

As for anxiety and depression, talk to your doctor. Those two problems combined can cause problems with Diabetes. The sooner you do something about it the better off you will be.

The one thing I have always done in life is not depend on others to be supportive of me and my needs. That can become a crutch and I don't like depending on others for what ever I choose to do.

You can't make your family or friends be supportive of you while you come to terms with your Diabetes. They may also be dealing with the news or they simply don't care. Don't deal with it. If they have questions answer them. If they don't have questions, don't ask them. Don't treat them any differently than you did prior to being Diabetic. In time they may come around and ask you all kinds of questions. The key in this is to take care of yourself.

I also learned years ago that how you feel is a choice. If you choose to feel alone you will at times be consumed by loneliness. You can be in a crowd and feel alone even if you talk to people in the crowd.

For my dry skin i use pure Shea Butter and I also use Shea Moisture African Black Soap Body Lotion and Body Wash. The cheapest place to buy it is Walgreen's or WalMart. I also take Natures Bounty Hair Skin and Nails gummy vitamins. I take two ever night and I have noticed my skin is not as dry and neither is my hair.

The one thing you should do is find something you like doing and do it. I am very involved in my community, make jewelry and sell it at a Farmers Market, do jigsaw puzzles, play games in and I love my Adult Coloring Book. I always have something to do. My sister and I love combing through Thrift Stores for items to use as table decor at the Market.

Take one day at a time and have some fun. When you get up in the morning the first thing to say is, "Just for to day I am going to ______." You fill in the blank. I have Diabetes, it does not have me and it does not control my life.

onafixedincome 2017-04-15 22:13:16 -0500 Report

First A1c at 6.5? You're better than I was (12 plus mumble), so with luck it got caught faster and you'll do better. Were you doing OK on the Trulicity? Many times, insurance can require you to take 'their' choice of medication, and if that doesn't work for you, your doctor can then change it to find the one that does. Don't give up! I almost did before my doctor came through for me and walked me through how insurance works with stuff like this.

Blood pressure meds are often given at the time of diagnosis as a method to help prevent or delay kidney damage; if your BP is high, suggest you investigate these with your doctor.

As for anxiety and depression—welcome to my life. :) However—it IS possible to work past a lot of it, with help and sometimes the right medications. I don't know what yours stems from, but one thing that helped me a lot was to acknowledge that it was OK to have diabetes—it's nobody's fault, just something that happens, and IT CAN BE FOUGHT AND BEATEN (more or less). Another thing was making sure I made and took the time to just relax quietly somewhere. In the car. At a restaurant, reading a book while eating a lesiurely and healthy meal (mine's usually broccoli and hamburger). On the roof, if need be—it's really, truly important to give yourself time to accept the diagnosis and be able to work with it. Honest. It helps.

Family and friends…*rolling eyes*…Yep. Just…yep. Best news of the day? You found this place, which is full of some really knowledgeable people and kind ones, who have been there, done that, and aren't perfect either. We all know that stuff happens, and its our pleasure to pass on what we've learned to others who may need it.

One thing that has helped many of us to smooth the road is to follow a lower carbohydrate, higher fat diet—and that means first, count 'em up. Figure out how many carbohydrate grams you eat in a day, and when you quit panicking, take a deep breath and realize that a lot of things can be reduced or changed without killing you, even if it feels like it might. Pasta. Potatoes. Bread. Soda (my big downfall). Complex or simple carbs, it all converts to sugar when you eat it, so it's time to cut it back. The higher fat and quality protein aspects seem to do a lot to help smooth the spikes; getting your blood glucose down below about 150 on a regular basis should help a LOT with the aches and pains. It's okay to take something like Motrin or buffered aspirin to help with those, and gentle stretching also can be a good routine to get into to help.

I'll quit now, but if your family and friends give you any guff, just smile and say, "Sorry, not on the diet plan."…and stick to it. Or "Nope, can't eat that anymore, so pass it on to Joe over there." Or simply say 'No thank you" if it's something where a sweet treat is going around—not everyone needs to know you have diabetes, really…just that you aren't eating the same stuff you used to, or that you're on 'a diet'. YOU CAN DO IT, and you'll do great.

Good luck and keep striding along—you aren't alone by any means.

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2017-04-15 17:11:30 -0500 Report

HI Dani, it's great to meet you. Glad you found your way to this supportive community. I know it's rough to receive a new medical diagnosis. Diabetes comes with a lot of changes and responsibilities, and that can feel overwhelming at first. Sounds like you have a lot going on, physically and emotionally. And diabetes sure brings up a lot of emotions. I am a therapist so I have to start there. Are you talking with a counselor? That could help a lot! There is a lot to be said for sitting down with someone who is both objective and trained, and talking things out, getting a new perspective, learning some new ways to cope. You might check on your insurance company's website to see what they offer and who is in their provider network, and start reaching out to a mental health professional. I hope you will stay in touch with us. Take good care of yourself.

GabbyPA 2017-04-14 06:54:22 -0500 Report

If you are like me, you have found a support and family here. We get it because a lot of us have been there. One of the things that helped me greatly was just learning all I could about diabetes. Knowledge gave me more confidence and that helped me proceed with less help from those who didn't understand what I was going through.

You are in good hands here.

haoleboy 2017-04-13 11:44:02 -0500 Report

one day at a time
one moment at a time

“The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, worry about the future, or anticipate troubles, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly.”

☮ Steve

SugarHatesMe 2017-04-13 06:23:34 -0500 Report

I sorry to hear that you are feeling upset, I was there once. Getting into the swing of things can be daunting, combined with the stresses of work and life… its hard. You need to realize something very important, right now is the time where you decide how important your life is and how you want to live. Read Books, Eat right, Monitor yourself, Exercise, and set goals to get better. Most important of all you need to Think Positive.

WASHED OUT 2017-04-12 06:46:04 -0500 Report

Hello, welcome to our group. You certainly have come to the right place. I understand what you are going through and it is tough and stressful, not that long ago I was in the same type of situation, with all kinds of health problems. Today, after coming to this site my friends here helped me to get on the right diet that improved all my disabling conditions. It sounds like your body inflammation level is high, one of the main culprits is high glucose as this causes inflammation. See if your local library has Dr Richard Bernstein's book called,( Diabetes Solutions ). I highly recommend it. It explains how diabetes works in people and how diet is a huge part of the treatment. Most of our group here are on low carbohydrate high natural fat diets and the proof that it works is all through our group and their medical test results including myself. Please come here often and get to know our group, we all are diabetic here and have many experiences to share with you that could help you with your health. My name is Dennis although I go by Washed Out, because when I came here my bad health had washed me out of my profession and I became disabled. When I was diagnosed I had over a 13 A1C I now am a 5.8 A1C.

Corrie Jo
Corrie Jo 2017-05-14 17:58:38 -0500 Report

Dennis!! That is amazing!!! You are awesome buddy—13 to 5.8?? Just incredible. Truly!! :0)

WASHED OUT 2017-05-14 22:24:39 -0500 Report

There are many in our group that also has had that kind of success. I may not have listened and jumped onboard had it not been for some of the old veteran diabetics that had been there done that. I know that our diet and tactics are not according to what the ADA recommends, but it is proven to work. In fact the ADA diet sets you up to fail always getting worse and requiring more medication. What we have perfected actually treats our diabetes at the cause and not just the symptoms which is what the ADA does. Even type 1 and me a type 1.5 can become more insulin sensitive where our bodies can more efficiently use the insulin we inject. The type 2 people are insulin resistant and in most cases make more than enough body insulin, it is just that their body has become resistant or ineffective to using it. Insulin is what allows our blood glucose to be used as energy in our bodies cells, and glucose powers the who body. It build up in our blood if we don't have a proper amount of insulin to unlock our body cells allowing glucose to be used , it is the key that unlocks the use of glucose. Diet and fasting are the two things you can use to become more insulin resistant. The fasting will allow us to lose weight reducing the need for so much insulin to using glucose.
Every person now has the same amount of fat cells as their genetics and diet they had in early adulthood. The fat cells may have enlarged or shrinked but the amount of them are the same. The larger they are the more energy it takes to supply them, the problem occurs when they become insulin resistant. Buy shrinking them by fasting the body's need for insulin and glucose also drops more efficiently using what the extra insulin that is in the body. This is the key to effectively treating your disease in place of covering just the symptoms with whatever medication we take.
This has extended me many more years of life again and a healthier body. When you treat the cause you improve every part of your body not just the blood glucose levels. It balances out the unbalanced causes, such as the complications that come with diabetes. Heart , veins, arteries, plaque, nerve damage, cholesterol, joint inflammation, fatty liver and many more symptoms that are caused by bad diet and diabetes. 95% of all the fatal diseases that plague mankind are caused by bad diet, so this should tell us where to begin to change that outcome. We live in an age that highly processed foods , chemicals and preservatives that are foreign to our bodies make changes that are not recognized by the human digestive system. By going back to natural and doing away with foods that our bodies have trouble digesting correctly we improve the things that have gone wrong. Mother nature didn't intend for us to eat many of the things that have become America's foods. Many Thousands of generations of our ancestors have trained our internal systems on what to survive on and how to work. Things go wrong when we add things that wasn't intended for the body. I hope I have explained this well enough you can understand.