Just found out and severely Depressed

By DeanasMom Latest Reply 2010-11-18 20:32:55 -0600
Started 2009-08-22 07:47:39 -0500

My daughter just found out she has Type2 Diabetes. The dr. feels she has probably had it for years. She is a single mom and has just recently been able to get health insurance. Neither I nor her know anything about this disease. I have spent the last 6 days reading everything i can find on this disease and everything i read scares me to death. And its not ME who has it, is my beautiful daughter, Deana. She has sunken into a terrible depression since she found out last week. Her doctor, whom i feel has the bedside manner of a goat, was curt, cold and quick with her. Told her normal sugar should be around a "5" (?? means nothing to a newbie like me and her), high is a "7" and hers was 12 !! With that he handed her a couple of packets of sample Actos 15 mg, set her up to see a diabetes specialist on the 28th, (over 10 days later!), gave her some sort of a pen thing that has insulin shots inside of it, yet didnt tell her what to do with it, how, when or where to use it and sent her on her way, with an appt to come back to him on Sept 10th! She called me hysterical crying, driving around town in her car, terrified that she was going to die. Since then she has tried to figure out on her own what to eat, what not to eat, so shes not eating anything. She has lost 9lbs and is extremely depressed. If I try to get her to eat this or that from reading diabetic diets, she gets defensive, goes into a pity party, and cuts me off. I am at this point walking around in tears myself most of the time. She lives about 4o mins away and I cant be there to even give her a hug or help her. This site, Im sorry to say, is full of horror stories, and now I am beginning to see that she probably is justified in her fears and can understand her despair and depression. I dont know what to do, except to pray.

Is there anyone else on here, that might understand what i just wrote? Can anyone tell me something encouraging, something good, something kind, that I can pass along to her?? Is it all toe amputations, comas, never ending medications with horrible side effects? Why then, do people say, "Oh, no big deal, its very easy to live with and can be controlled, its not a death sentence". Just visiting this site for 10 minutes, going straight to the Newly Diagnosed section where i hoped to find any sort of comfort, made me feel even worse. Actually, I dont think im coming back to read anything else on here. I am totally devestated and feel as if Im stupid and ignorant, and where the hell have I been ??

189 replies

kboard306 2010-11-18 20:32:55 -0600 Report

I just learned this past September I have type II diabetes. I was stunned because when I went to the doctor I thought I was having prostate issues. I should have seen it coming as I am over weight and have high blood pressure. I can understand how a person could become depressed over this diagnosis, but I chose to look at it as a blessing. I am now forced to watch what I eat and exercise. I truely feel if I follow the directions from my doctor this is no big deal and I will live a long and productive life. My mom was devistated, but I assured her it was no big deal, as long as I took care of myself, which I totally started doing. My wife has been wonderful and take an active interest in how I eat, and does give me hell if I eat something I shouldn't or too much of something. I don't do that often however. She and I discuss my diabetes and work together to make things as good as they can be. I am one lucky man. I want you and your daughter to know it is NOT a death sentence. I am now eating the way people should eat, by watching carbs in food intake and am no longer a couch potatoe. I have lots of energy I did not have two months ago. I don't eat a lot of junk anymore, even though I have been told I can on occassion. It will have to be one special occassion for me to do so however. As for losing limbs, I don't intend to lose anything. It is just a matter of controlling my blood sugar. I might also suggest she see a nutritionist to learn about foods as well as attend a diabetes school. I have done both. The diabetes school is a four week program put on by one of the local hospitals. I have learned a lot from both. I am by no means an expert on my diabetes, but I am taking the time to learn. That is all you both need to do, and I promise, at least from my point of view, you both will have any and all fears resolved. I hope this helps.

CGoodman 2010-01-06 05:19:10 -0600 Report

I know it's scary but she will be ok as long as she does what the doctor says to do. I have been living with diabetes for 10 years now and I take 5 needles a day. So far I have no horror stories of amputations etc…With a good doctor and a nutritionist it CAN be controlled with little or no complications. The amputation comes from not doing as told and letting the sugar get out of hand.

One question I have is…Is your daughter oveweight? If she is overweight she can have the Gastric Bypass surgery. More often than not, the surgery eliminates the diabetes as well as the weight for a more healthier life!

nerdse 2010-01-06 08:25:56 -0600 Report

I have to, well, "weigh in" here on weight loss surgery. My apologies in advance to anyone who's actually had an easy time of it & lost a lot of weight & is living the good life, but I'm adamantly opposed to this stuff. It's a real moneymaker for doctors. But you lose only 60 - 80% of your excess body weight, which means you'll still have 20 - 40% of that excess weight when you get to where you can't lose any more. So you'll have gone on a program that demands at least 4 hours of exercise a day, expensive protein supplements, formulas, & pills to deal with the malnutrition that's part of this, only to end up fat anyway - and now, with skin hanging off all over your body. If the insurance pays for anything, it only pays to whack some of the excess skin off your belly - basically, they pull it out, cut it off, & sew the ends together across the belly.

After the 5 year mark, when they don't follow you anymore, you have osteoporosis, sometimes you need a hip replacement or 2 for avascular necrosis (lack of adequate blood supply to the hip joint), you age 15 yr all of a sudden, & if they do anything about all the loose skin, they just hack some of it off your belly - they don't do anything about the legs, arm, back, etc. For a while, getting the weight off helps arthritis & regulates blood sugars - but then, the way the surgery messes with the pancreas's digestive section (the pancreas has 2 parts - endocrine, the part that regulates blood sugar, & exocrine, the part that puts enzymes into your intestines so you can digest proteins), often the diabetes comes back & you end up on insulin quite rapidly. Controlling sugars can become very difficult if that happens. And the arthritis comes back.

There's a guy down the street from me, he's young enough to be my son, but he had this done about 10 yr ago. I hadn't seen him for a while; I was working or caregiving & his job required a bit of travel. In fact, I'm amazed he managed it. He looked pretty good as it was going down, but then, it stopped. Now, he looks like he's 70. He walks with a cane; it's obvious every step hurts; his hair's thinning; complexion is greyish underneath a sallow look; skin is hanging loosely off arms, back, thighs, you can tell under the clothes. He is still fatter than I am. He did start out a lot bigger than I am, but now, he's a little heavier.

So, what did he gain again?

The surgery site often gets infected, but they always blame the patient, saying they're fat & they have poor personal hygiene, & that's why they get infections. They blame them & often do not treat it adequately. The complications I've heard about are terrible. One person had to have constant care because they got so weak, they couldn't stand, walk, or turn in bed - but the family had to provide the care, without training, because even though the person should've been hospitalized or at least eligible for home health, because it's "elective surgery," & considered primarily cosmetic in nature, home health isn't covered & often, insurance will deny coverage for the infections, adding huge medical bills.

Again, I have to ask why anyone would subject themselves to this? Why live through those infections? All the vomiting, the diarrhea, the trips to the emergency room for IV fluids? And since I'm a nurse, I've heard how these "bariatric surgeons" talk about their patients to other slim doctors. We're stupid, ugly, idiotic, can't lose weight on our own, mentally deficient, too lazy to do what it takes & looking for an easy out, & they're glad when patients get infections, throw up, etc., because that'll teach them a lesson, how they should have just done the work in the first place.

People ask for this surgery hoping they'll be thin & attractive. It does happen sometimes, & there's that one TV personality who had it done - of course he's fine; for one thing, he has the money to get real plastic surgery; for another, it's in the doctors' best interests to keep him healthy at all costs because he's going to sell this surgery to a lot of others. But he's still not thin; he's still a little heavy. And the rest of that weight just won't come off. All that talk they heard about how this would stop those gastric hormones that cause weight gain? Funny, but it's been less than a year ago that a completely experimental stomach stapling procedure was being hailed as the FIRST sugery to regulate the gastric hormone responsible for big appetites & weight gain. Someone's fibbing…

I realize some people will still opt for this, going to any expense to do it. In fact, it's now considered the best treatment for obesity. Well, I'd hate to see the worst!

I used to say jokingly that with the diet & exercise regimes I had to go through to stay a little less obese, the doctors' attitudes were "get thin or die trying" - well, it seems they've made that official.

feather 2010-01-03 21:33:57 -0600 Report

My sister and I are both diabetic 2. We found out last summer. My sister was put on meds and insulin. I am on diet control. Please tell your daughter that many people live 20 + years with diabetes and many live happy, full and complete lives. There is nothing to fear. Management is the key. First, write a daily food diary, so you can know what foods make your sugar go up and which do not or raise it only slightly. Second, drink plenty of water this helps you feel more energetic and helps balance the sugar level in your blood. Third, exercise just even walking thirty minutes a day is great to help keep sugar levels good and spirits up. Fourth, Know that you are in command of your diabetes. You do not have to be afraid of eating. You can eat anything you want in small amounts. Of course if you are going to a fancy party you may want to curtail your eating before going to sort of save your sugar level to have a little something special at the party. Alcohol is a big NO NO only because it is a direct ticket to a big jump up in sugar. But a very small amount of wine if
you are not taking any conflicting drugs of other kinds is O.K. but I do not drink at all because I would like to save my liver from the trauma of trying to balance my alcohol intake. MY typical day meals as follows: Wheat toast, coffee,sweetener,skim milk one egg over easy one pat I can't Believe its not Butter and one teaspoon sugar free fruit spread(which tastes pretty good). Lunch: Green Romaine lettuce salad w/lite fat free dressing, two tablespoons of tuna,turkey or chicken(I avoid Beef just me) Wyler's sugar free raspberry tea, Wheat crackers or 1 slice wheat bread Apple for dessert.Dinner: Broccoli and cheese(fat free cheese) small slice of ham and 2 vanilla wafers for desert. These are just some samples and I try to eat wheat cereal before I go to bed with skim milk. My sister eats twice as much as I do and just adjusts her insulin shot accordingly before each meal. But I have heard that some have even been able to get off of insulin if they control what they eat and drink (I am trying not to have to get shots) God Bless You and your daughter and tell her it is not the end only the beginning of a new adventure in watching what you eat and how good you can keep your numbers level.

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2010-01-04 12:29:34 -0600 Report

Thank you so much for your sensible information, Feather!! It gives me some ideas for meals too, some that I can understand and manage! Pat R

appleseed 2009-12-10 10:12:53 -0600 Report

Just know that you are not alone, there are lots of ppl out there who can offer you support. Let us know how we can help

Nancbrumley 2009-12-07 13:33:45 -0600 Report

Hi, There! I'm Nancy and I was diagnosed with Type 2 in April of this year. My Doctor did practically the same to me as your daughter's doc, but that does set the course…you have to make a move forward on your own, no one can do this for her. With her blood sugar at 12, that is very high. If this was her first diabetes test, she should immediately get a meter and begin testing her blood sugar every morning (fasting)…I'll hope that her blood sugar might be down since she lost weight. However, she must learn to eat proper foods that are good for her and omit the bad…white bread, pasta, sugar, potatoes, and eat good things…fresh fruits and veggies, chicken, fish…salads, no creamy salad dressings, but vinegar-based dressings are good as well. I am still working on getting my A1C down below 6…I am at 6.9 now and at one time was a 12!!!! so don't "freak out"…take a stand and stand with us here…we are all here to learn from each other. I just found this sight yesterday and have already learned some very interesting things. Please ask your daughter to try to forum…we will welcome her! Best regards and keep your chin up, too, Mom!

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2009-12-07 13:39:02 -0600 Report

Welcome, Nanc!!! I had worked in a hospital and knew SOME, but mostly on brittle diabetics that had collapsed and been admitted to our hospital But there is so much to learn before that crisis, and this site is an excellent source of learning and support! Pat R

Hinboyz3 2009-10-28 14:25:55 -0500 Report

Dont feel as though this isn't a good site to voice your opinions or just to come and vent and also learn a lot of helpful things from people that have been in this place a lot longer than we have. This is all new to me also I just found out a few months ago, yes it hurts, but when it all comes down it's only one me, and I got to do what ever it takes to be around to see my kids grow up and have kids. I could lay down in the middle of the street and just give up but we got way more to live for and to be happy for in this world. Just when you think you've got it bad you hear someone elses story and they are the one's with the real problem. So talk to your daughter as much as you can and help her when needed. You know how a mom's job is, first thing is to protect your child and not let nothing hurt her. So just hold on pray and be their for her. And all the friends here will differently will be right here anytime any day. I will keep you both in my prayers, things will work out.

dj sonic
dj sonic 2009-10-28 14:15:06 -0500 Report

I know what you two are going through. I myself have found out recently i have type 2 diabetes and i am trying to cope with it day by day. I completely understand what you wrote and i am here to just tell you i will be here to help you, your daughter and anyone else who needs to talk about our condition. I went in for a check up on september 30th 2009 and she took my blood sugar and all i seen was her eyes open wide and her mouth drop. She showed me the meter and it said 561. I didnt know anything about that and asked her how bad it was. She then told me that it was real bad and asked me to get some blood work done so she can see where my A1C is at. After the results came in, she said that mine was the highest she has ever seen, It was at 17 and told me that i probably have had it for a long time now. In march May of 2009 i started loosing weight rapidly and always felt like i needed something to drink all the time (ice water). Through out the time period i lost 52 pounds. I used to weigh 185 and when i went to my doctor i weighed in at 133. Well after i have been taking my insulin shots and the other medication for it, i have recently gained back 27 pounds and now I feel and look much better. So i am here for you or your daughter or anyone else if you ever need to talk. And i will try to be as much help as i can. So the hardest part for me with living with diabetes is changing my eating habits. I agree with Crashnot. Have your daughter or yourself to read all the labels on your foods and drinks. It might honestly be the hardest part of living with this condition, i think, is getting used to what you can or cannot eat or drink… Christopher.

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2009-10-28 14:25:40 -0500 Report

I agree, Crashnot—I love your name—-play on words!! After 3 years, I am finally accepting the fact that I have to watch what I eat, do try to exercise, do chair exercises 3 times a week—-did swim when it was warm enough to be open—

Ironically, I thought that I had it down PAT——then the kidney and cancer, taken off Metformin 750 mg a day—-and NOW have to start all over, but at least NOW I have a better clue as to HOW to eat, make adjustments to handle the quick action of a New med, Zipiglizide (is that how you spell it?) I am tired, so will go rest!! Hugs to ALL, Pat R

dmk 2009-09-21 02:43:19 -0500 Report

I found out this past January that I was Type 2 diabetic and probably had been for the past 10 years. I sucked it up and have been following my Dr.'s and nutrionist orders and have lost about 30 lbs since my diagnosis. I've brought my AC1 levels down to about normal through diet and medication. I still have about 30 more lbs to lose,and am working on that, but I feel so much better since I started my medication. Your daughter sould welcome the diagnosis and try to follow what her Dr. and nutrionist tells her to do. It's a hard road, but it's well worth the work it takes.

SassyBaby 2009-09-20 03:51:53 -0500 Report

I've been recently diagnosed myself… it's really hard to hear that you have a life changing life altering disease that you must contend with the rest of your life. I watched my beloved Mother struggle with working out her blood sugar and diabetes injection needs and fail day after day. Her refusal to change her diet either through misinformation or lack of information was always a point of aggravation for us both. She was nearly 375 when she was diagnosed and had given up on dieting, losing weight, dropping any type of poundage. When she had lost weight she had that very visible "apron" from the loose skin. She couldn't deal with that. So we, well I, tried to help her make better food choices, but at 53, she had given up anything that caused her stress. She was all about comfort and frankly I couldn't blame her. Though I did try to help her make better choices to sort of stablize her blood sugar so the 3x's a day shots would be more effective. She didn't particularly listen and despite all my best efforts, she passed away suddenly at age 55 - exactly 1 wk. after her birthday. You can imagine how devastating this was to me. There were no indications she was headed in that direction. I lost her unexpectedly and grieveously.
Fast forward 19 yrs. and here I am.. now 55 yrs. old, but in much better health than my mother, facing the same disease that she so struggled with. I cannot exercise as my spine is disintegrating. I've already had a morphine pump inplanted (4yrs. ago) and receive monthly steroid injections directly into my spine. Exercise just isn't on my horizon at any time in any form. I'm sitting at a level 255 and have been there for the last 10 yrs. due to my inability to exercise and just watching your intake doesn't do it.

I'm frightened.. I'm not ready to die and leave my loving husband and special needs son. I must live on for a very long time.. and while I cannot exercise (I can't even go for a short walk.. my back/pain levels don't allow for that) I do watch what I eat 85% of the time. I had lost 22 lbs. after 6 mos. of due diligence only to have it return in 2 wks. after my doc. put me on Actos.. horrible stuff… I'm off it now but still have terribly swollen feet and legs. The 20 lbs. I'd so struggled to lose came right back on and they won't leave now.. and the swelling hasn't gone down even though I stopped the medication after 3 wks. of being on it.

I'm now insulin injection dependant.. 30 units morning and night.. any blood sugar reading over 150 gets me pure insulin at 150-200 B.S.=4units, 200-250B.S.=6 units.. etc. etc. etc. I've actually had my B.S. down so only the 75/25 mixture was needed.

I hate this.. I hate that it controls my life.. when to eat., what to eat, that I have to eat.. I'm a HUGE veggie and fruit eater.. slim on the pasta and rice and potatoes and things.. and still nothing changes. I don't always eat (due to the morphine my appetite is greatly reduced… but still I "HAVE" to eat.. blech).

It's hard.. it's scary.. it's annoying.. it's prophetic.. it's the worst thing I've had to deal with in my life medically. I faced and beat breast cancer and it was easier.


I"m scared, depressed, determined, annoyed, pissed off, ambevilant.. all those and so much more.. but probably more depressed than anything.. I seem to have lost interest in everything. Hell I beat cancer 3 times in my life.. and this is going to determine what I do and when and how?? BULLSHIT!

Ok.. well that's all I wanted to say.. to finally get it out.. to tell someone else how much this sucks and irritates me… beyond measure… and the helplessness is nothing I deal well with.


God bless all of you fighting this disease.. may you find your victory and lose this nemesis forever.


Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2009-09-21 02:12:30 -0500 Report

Hi, Sasy!! Well, you sure have come to the right place to vent, get it all OUT so that a better attitude and better life style, can kick in! since I have been allowed to discuss on this site, how tired I am of TRYING TO DO BETTER ALL of the TIME over this, or that, I can now actually strive to live a better lifestyle, and benefit from it—-as we all deserve it!! Later, am tired and must get some sleep!! PR

Sue Turner
Sue Turner 2009-12-07 17:38:29 -0600 Report

Hi Sassy,

I just saw your post. You go girl. I know exactly how you feel, about the diabetes that is. I haven't had to deal with cancer or anything like that, not yet anyway. Who knows what tomorrow will bring. But, I too was just recently diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. I have felt all the things you have felt. I can't exercise very much either, because about 6 yrs. ago, I broke my left knew, and have had 5 surgeries on it. I have no knee cap, no tendons, it is a mess. I should wear a brace, but when this happened I was in the process of getting out of a relationship and going into another one so I lost my insurance. I couldn't afford the brace. I got staph infection in my knee and it took a year to get over that. I still worry about my knee and leg, and now with the diabetes,I worry even more because of circulation problems. I don't have any yet, and I pray that I never do. But I had to have plastic surgery; they split my calf muscle and flapped it over to give a little more support to the knee, but I still don't have enough. If I get off balance, down I go. I have fallen several times; broke my right wrist one time when I fell, so now I have all of these screws and pins in that wrist, and it hurts all the time. Oh well, I could go on forever, but I want. So you hang in there, and stay on this site. There are a lot of wonderful people on here to help and be here for us when we feel the need to vent. Cordially, Sue T.

Da Rose Ohana
Da Rose Ohana 2009-09-15 15:34:08 -0500 Report

I am sorry to hear this but your daughter has to help herself first. She needs to make a choice whether diabetes will take over her life or she will fight the disease and be around for her kids. Sorry, I may sound harsh but I speak from experience. In June 2008, I was diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes. My DR. told me that I have to lose weight and watch what I eat. He referred me to a dietitian who told me what to eat and not to eat. She also told me to walk 30 mins after every meal. I cut out carbs (rice, potatoes, pasta etc). I ate alot of salads and vegetables. For breakfast, I would have a cup of Berries or fruits (whatever is in season) with yogurt (check sugar and carbs on label). It is very important that she reads the labels on all the food that she buys from the store.

If she have a computer, www.diabetes.org will help her alot. Type 2 diabetes can be controlled by diet and exercise. My diabetes is gone. I am a happy camper. Good Luck!

SmartyMarti1 2009-09-15 16:02:03 -0500 Report

Hi There. I was just diagnosed about a year and a half ago with Type 2 diabetes. Diabetes runs on my dad's side of the family. My advice is to get your hands on helpful information and to take nutrition classes. I am not saying it will be easy but any strides you make towards improving your A1C count will help you live longer and ward off the effects of diabetes. It is up and down just like everything else. Thankfully, there is a lot of information out there. Good luck!

beadmom 2009-09-15 19:01:09 -0500 Report

OK.. so I have a question. Is it really "gone" I know you can get to a point where you are off meds but can you get to a place where you don't have to watch and think about everything you eat etc?

Is there really ever going to be a big mac/fries/soda moment again in my life?

I am thinking not but am hopeful.


SmartyMarti1 2009-09-16 16:10:24 -0500 Report

I think you'll have to watch it all your life, especially if you have hereditary factors. Like my dr. said, if I lost 15-20 lbs and kept it off, I could go off meds. That isn't to say I won't go to see the dr. or ever have checkups. When I first was diagnosed, I went low carb and lost weight. What I did was eat a little more often and ate less at each time, I did lose weight! However, gained some back because I wasn't watching my diet. I would do fine all week and then when we went out on Sat. night I would allow myself french fries or something like that and my A1C count was very good. I could splurge a LITTLE on the weekends and do fine. Doesn't mean you can't cheat on occasion but then you'd have to watch your calories or carbs the rest of the day/week. I think we Americans base our entertainment too much around food and drink and that can be a big part of why diabetes is on the rise in the US…Anyway, good luck!

beadmom 2009-09-17 16:24:59 -0500 Report

Well.. I'm not that fond of Big Mac's anyway :)

But… chocolate croissant and cafe' in the morning on a Paris sidewalk right after it rains…


nikonman09 2009-09-12 22:29:07 -0500 Report

Hi Deannasmom: I jsut go t back from 25 days in China. If I could control my diabetes in a country with a pretty poor health system so can your daughter. I can sympathise with you and I am not one to mince words so I will tell it like it is. First thing to do is get rid of that jerk who calls himself a doctor! If he is that insensitive you don't want her going back to him anyway. Remember they work for you! Not the other way around. Next, you have already gotten a lot of advice and it is all from people just like me who are also dealing with this issue. Research is your best ally. But you must get Deanna to do this for herself because, no matter what you do, if she does not admit to having Diabetes and set her mind to deal with it you will find yourself in ill health just trying to help her! It can be a devastating thing to deal with at first, but once you start realizing that there are many avenues open to Deanna both she and you will feel much more in control. Carbs are the enemy, as is a bad doctor. Get on a good regemin of several small meals a day instead of three big ones and utilize the things the good earth provides. Lots of veggies, fruit (within reason because of the sugars), and protein protein protein. She does not have to eat a lot just small balanced mini meals (five or six a day is best). This keeps the body more even and helps to alleviate the ups and downs that are so common. One very good item is one of the better quality 100% Whey protein shake mixes. Mixed mostly with water but with a little milk to help the taste and she can fill in proteins very well. Hang in there and keep working on it and you both will be fine.

SmartyMarti1 2009-09-16 16:14:13 -0500 Report

I bet in China they don't have much diabetes. Their diet is better overall, unless they've become westernized. They don't eat much red meat, drink tea, soup and eat fish and seaweed. My mom is from Japan and she is small. Only 5 ft tall, 95 lbs. She weighed more than that during her child bearing years but lost some in her sr. years. But my diabetes is from dad's side. I am taller and heavier than her, although I am not a big woman, I am built small. Losing 15-20 lbs would be of benefit for me, but hard to do and keep off.

Mary2 2009-09-12 20:11:10 -0500 Report

Dear Deana,
i was in the same boat as you in Dec. I went into a diabetic coma and when I came to I had a wonderful doctor waiting for me to wake up to help me get thur this. It has taken a while to get my inslin adjusted, but he has. Make sure you fine a doctor who will work with you.Don'r be afraid to ask questions. Good luck and let me know how things go. Mary

Mary2 2009-09-12 20:17:32 -0500 Report

Go to Walmart who can help you find the cheapest insluin for you budget. I did.

Darly 2009-09-12 20:20:24 -0500 Report

Just had to say what a beautiful baby you have there!

Hope you are all doing okay! Have a great evening…Darlene*

biscuits983 2009-09-12 18:18:03 -0500 Report

i had type 2 and got rid of it after dealing with it for years and seeing the effects it had on my parents they were insulin dependant.type 1, by the time i had gastric bypass last aug i was on 4 different pills, and insulin was to be next i said no and had gastric bypass and as of feburary 09 i havent taken any meds for diabetes i take lots of vitimans because when u have gastric it is necessary but i would trade vitimans for meds any day please feel free to ask me any ? my email is biscuits983@yahoo.com small tell your daughter do not give up hope she needs first to see a dietiticain noit sure i spelled that right. there are lots of options but u just have got to take care of yourself and diet and exercise are important. ttyl Terri

Darron 2009-09-11 07:56:40 -0500 Report

I was told in April this year that I was a Type II diabetic. First in my family. We have been seeing our family doctor for over 25 years. I thought I was having heart problems due to the test the doctors office had given me after my wife had taken me due to being fatiqued and getting dizzy. Three days later I was still feeling the same and getting worse. My wife then took me to an emergency doctors office and he told me then my A1C was 14 and my sugar was close to 600. We went back to my family doctor the next day. He gave me some medicine and a booklet on diabeties then sent me home. He gave me the same same song and dance that she received. After two months and alot of reading on the internet I determined I needed to see an Internal Medicine Doctor. I contacted my insurance company which a representative agreed with me and we compiled a list of doctors in my area that specialized in internal medicine. I did a little research on each group and found one that I was comfortable with. After talking with her I found my gut feeling was correct, my family doctor was not specialized with diabetes. To make a long story short I was getting depressed and mostly overwhelmed. My doctor now has got my sugar in control and working on getting my emotions in control also. I am a very competitive and a numbers guy. I was freaking out because of my numbers was like a roller coaster. Tell her to take one day at a time and yourself too. It is great that you are there for her. Just don't push too hard. My wife, kids and in-laws has been there for me every time I have needed them.

res416 2009-09-10 11:52:16 -0500 Report

Hi. I know the feeling!! I have had diabetes for probably 20 years but had grown lax about checking it. I take oral medication for it. Anyway two years ago I went to a new doctor and he found my A1C was 11.7 and he nearly fainted. He just "knew" I would have to go on insulin. Well I told him not if I can help it so he prescribed different medications and sent me home to see if they would help. I went on a severely (self prescribed) carbohydrate restricted diet, started walking and three months later when I returned to the doctor he couldn't believe his eyes. My A1C had dropped to 7.1. Since that time each time my A1C has been approximately 6.7. Now I gave up breads, sweets and basically lived off peanut butter, mixed nuts, meat, eggs and cheese—in my book better than insulin. Believe it or not, my triglycirides as well as my cholesterol moderated within acceptable range. I have found through trial and error that diet drinks elevate my blood sugar as well as artificially sweetened chocolate syrup. Also blood will skyrocket if a diabetic eats the "wrong" food but it may take 3 or 4 days for it to start coming down. Don't be discouraged. There are a number of sweetening products on the market that are actually GOOD FOR DIABETICS such as stevia, agave nectar and xylitol. Just this week I discovered a sugar replacement called Whey Low (check out their web site). Now all of these items are more expensive than the mass produced sugar and splenda, etc. I have ordered the Whey Low and can give a report later on my opinion of it. :) I am taking fish oil, nattokinase and my new doctor has suggested I start taking Juice Plus (order through their web site) as a multi vitamin. I plan to do that as well as more exercise. I could go on and on but I don't want to monopolize the conversation. The bottom line is to keep trying different foods to see what can be eaten without significantly raising blood sugar. Also check into the glycemic index. Life does go on so try not to be depressed. My very best wishes. Contact me if you want to discuss this topic further. I will be happy to share all that I have been able to find about it. By the way, one more thing—if she can locate a doctor who practices complementary medicine (uses both traditional medicine as well as alternative medicine) I would hightly recommend this to her. I have just located such a doctor!

jigsaw 2009-09-10 12:34:42 -0500 Report

res416—-I think thats some excellent info there! I agree with much of what you said and actually incorporate quite a bit of it into my daily routine! Of course exercise of sorts tops it off! I hope others glean some of the good info here!

Kathy Cook
Kathy Cook 2009-09-10 18:53:07 -0500 Report

I was interested in what you said about artificial sweeteners. My doctor told me not to drink diet soda because of what's in there. He said that if I find it necessary to drink soda (I do right now) to drink the regular kind. It works for me.

Hugs, Kathy

jigsaw 2009-09-11 06:51:22 -0500 Report

I understand that many artificial sweetners are not healthy! On the other hand, a regular can of coca cola has about 13 teaspoons of sugar!!! As res416 mentioned, STEVIA is a safe sweetner. It's been in use in some countries for hundreds of years with no known negative affects and is currently available in many supermarkets,grocery stores and health food stores.

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2009-09-11 09:27:25 -0500 Report

Drink the regular kind? Hmm—my mom drank the REAL stuff, where I drink the diet, and she weighed less than I. Probably more to it, but I had heard that diet is NOT good for us! hmmmmPat R

beadmom 2009-09-15 14:20:29 -0500 Report

Be careful with the Juice Plus. It eleveated my liver enzymes dramatically. My Doctor said he ahd seen that in several people taking Juice Plus.


Anonymous 2009-09-09 23:31:23 -0500 Report

I was diagnosed about a month ago, and am still awaiting the educational classes required by my doctor. This is not the vbest thing in the world to happen to someone, but its also not the worst. Attitude is everything. Your daughter just needs to look at is as an inconvenience NOT and in hibvitor! I am 60 , havee adult children, and almost 6 grandchildren and feel I have lots of life to me still! I will not feel sorry for myself and continue to get more diabetes information and do whatever it takes to get past this temporary inconvenience. Just use a little tough love and tell your daughter to get a grip, get information ,and get over it. Adjust to your new situation of not for herself, for her child (and you too mom) good luck

jigsaw 2009-09-10 05:27:28 -0500 Report

Anonymous—-A very good answer and I'm behind you 100% !!! Being diagnosed can be a shattering experience. A bit of effort or maybe alot of effort to get informed, some adjustments to ones lifestyle and a long healthy life just might be in store for those who do it! I was diagnosed 16 years ago, and the sentence was watch what you eat, alot of exercize and maintain a positive attitude!!! It works!!!!!!!!

rain 2009-09-09 20:57:48 -0500 Report

That was her a1c that was a 12. You know it is a crappy hand however there has been so much research done that we can be very educated on the subject. The more you discover that more you can arm yourself with the right weapons for this battle field. Eventually (hopefully) she'll need to come out of the depression. she'll find that being a diabetic does not mean her life will be "unenjoyable". So many resources are available to have a fun and great life. I was very sad when I found out about myself having diabetes then I adjusted. In january I went on an insulin pump and fell into the slump again, and again I had to come out of it. I have so much to be happy and thankful for, diabetes will not keep me down. Tell your daughter to keep her head up, and try to focus on all the good things in her life(like her caring mom) that are worth enjoying. When she needs an understanding shoulder to listen tell her to log on we are all here.

Troy's Mom
Troy's Mom 2009-09-08 03:33:47 -0500 Report

I am so sorry. It is so hard. My baby boy Troy was diagnoised last December and the floor fell out from under us too. He is only two. As a mother I can relate to the hopeless feeling. All mother's want our babies to be healthy. I'm in my own spiral and can barely see the light. I am so scared but I know that we can never loose hope for our babies. Hang in there. Before you know it you will be an expert on everything concerning diabetes. As a mother I am with you. I am so sorry

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2009-09-08 11:33:46 -0500 Report

Oh, Troy's mom. I so feel for you!! To have a two year old diagnosed would come as such a shock!! What were his symptoms? I am glad that you came and shared your feelings and situation with us,it is so helpful and supportive to others in similar situations!!

I know that when the "dust settles" you will adjust, learn how to help your son, and a plan of action is so much better than the "not knowing" part! At least that is how I have felt in my own unexpected situations—we do adjust, after time and knowledge—Hugs to YOU and YOUR SON!! Pat R

Troy's Mom
Troy's Mom 2009-09-08 18:12:34 -0500 Report

Hi Pat!! Troy's symptoms were present for about a week but we missed all the first ones because who would think a two year old would get diabetes. The first clue…bed wetting. We thought it was the cheaper brand of diapers I had purchased. My husband sent me out for a better brand but they still leaked. The second clue…vomiting. Again we thought nothing of it but that it was December and he had caught the flu. Next sign excessive thirst. We missed this one because we thought it was good he was drinking a lot since he had the flu, what we thought was the flu. The final straw was a shallow, heavy, fast paced breathing. I tried to keep up with his breathing and it wore me out in a minute. At this point he was becoming weaker and weaker and would not even eat but he still wanted to drink water. I grabbed him and ran to the emergency room. They didn't know what it was either and put us on an ambulance within minutes we were sent to Valley Childrens hospital where they discovered his blood sugar was at 607. Oh, God part of me was just happy that they knew what it was and the other part of me seemed so far away. As you can see the signs were all there. Thank-you. I need to talk about this. I am a stay at home mother with Troy and another son who is four. My husband works 12 hour days and I am alone talking to myself cleaning a lot and tending to my little ones. Thank-you for your compassion.

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2009-09-08 20:08:56 -0500 Report

You bet, Troy's mom!!! We all need to vent when we are overwhelmed—-And I can also see where you would not think those symptoms out of line, for the same reasons you did!! you have been very vigilant and when things got worse, you were there and did the RIGHT THING!! I NEVER would have thought any of our 4 children to be diabetic—it doesn't run in our family etc—and they have so many little things coming and going in those first few years!! I am just so proud of you that you did stay on top of it until the "truth came out"!

Life has a way of taking its time I think, until we are ready—-kinda—haha—to handle more—but one must get their relaxed sleep and I know that any young mother finds that almost impossible, sounds good, but really—-!! But it is still true!

The best to you and your young children and may God envelop you and your family in His arms and protect and guide you all. Being a mom is not for the faint of heart!!! Hugs, Pat R

BeckyJ 2009-09-09 17:12:35 -0500 Report

Thank the angels that you were concerned. I have a very close friend who's child died last year because he wasn't diagnosed. My friend Lisa had to go into the hospital for an emergency surgery following a fall on the ice, she broke her pelvis.The baby was staying with her in-laws while she was in the hospital. Similar syptoms to the ones you described were overlooked as flu and because it was a holdiay weekend her Mother in law waited until Monday to take him to the pediatrician. By the time they got him in his blood sugar was over 700 and his organs were shutting down. He was hospitalized immediatly but died 3 days later from an infection. He would have been 3 years old this Halloween.

Troy's Mom
Troy's Mom 2009-09-09 20:07:21 -0500 Report

Oh Becky I am so sorry for Lisa and her family. Troy will be three this Halloween so that hit my heart to hear that Lisa's Baby was the same age. What a terrible tragedy. Oh that hurt my heart. I can't expand my feelings enough. Troy was at 607 when we got him in and he was getting so weak. We were very close to being to late. I am so sorry for your friends loss. It must be hard for you too. Thank-you for sharing. Troy's Mom

BeckyJ 2009-09-09 20:40:00 -0500 Report

I am just so glad that your little one has a chance to grow up to be the wonderful person he is sure to be. Best of luck in the adjustment and know that you all are in my prayers.

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2009-09-09 22:43:27 -0500 Report

Oh, my heart aches for you both!! Thank Heavens, Troy's mom, you persevered!! It is so difficult to suspect SOMETHING is WRONG, but WHAT??!! Especially with babies—-The other mother could not help her child either—-the family took the child in on a Mon, how often have we all tried to weather through a tumuoltous week-end—-(WHY is it always on a WEEK-END??) No one is to blame, but how HARD it is to convince your inner self that you have done your best!!

This is another of my stories of an aunt, many, many years ago, who went to another town to care for her dying father of stomach cancer, leaving her pretty, young 13 yr old daughter at home with her father. The girl became ill, was finally taken to a Dr BUT her appendix had already ruptured and she died. That mother was STRICKEN with guilt and grief! BUT it was, what it was, time goes on and the best that my mom and I could do, years later, was to decorate her grave with special tenderness every year, and now that my own mom passed away 2 yrs ago at age 98 yrs, I still decorate that child's grave, in respect to her mom too, who was only trying to help her mother care for her father, then lost her daughter as well. In those days, cancer, bad appendix etc were difficult, if not impossible to diagnose, you just had to go on gut instinct and try your best, which is all that any of us can do, no matter our ages.

God Bless you, Troy's mom and little Troy too, and may he be able to hoot and holler with the rest of the kids this coming Halloween day!! Keep us posted! Love and HUGS< PAt R

Jenay 2009-09-07 23:02:17 -0500 Report

the long road is not the end of the world .i am type 2 single mom too.it get easier as you go along the road.it is not hard to really understand i too at first found my self in that same state lost confused and not caring about anything until i found out my aunt is a type one fighting for her life.she said if anything you can do right now is to change bad eating habits to good ones slow at the start then head on in to it.low card high fiber helps me but i have had to give up all carbs so far cause they are in everything i test my sugar 4 times a day and still can not get it lower then 300 might be the tyroid acting up not sure on my part.i fyou need test supplies try amed direct thats where i get mine at low to little costs all you need is the phone number of your doctor and they do the rest for you God Bless and hang in there its gonna get better in the long run.

Kellun 2009-09-07 17:25:34 -0500 Report

I'm newly diagnosed myself — the diagnosis hit me hard, so naturally I grativated straight to this subject. Deana's Mom, as a mother myself, I completely understand your heart ache. You can be the best mom in the world but sometimes the best help our children receive is not from us. We have to figure the coping thing out for ourselves — it seems to be different for each person. For me, Antique Dan's comment that "well-controlled diabetes is the cause of … well, nothing" is about the most reassuring/feel better thing I've heard all month. For your daughter Deana, it may be some other comment that resonates and brings solace.

Perhaps like Deana, I've been struggling with the combined physical challenges of bringing undiagnosed out-of-control-diabetes under control, the emotional challenges around the stygma of the disease, frustration at coming to terms with a chronic condition, worry about how I as a single mom will continue full financial (and calm and loving)support of my children yet also somehow make sure I never become a burden to them. Amidst all of that in my head and body, I'm also supposed to zoom into expert knowledge and self-care and become my own advocate for medical and lifestyle advice and care. In my heart of hearts, I know I can do it. I am doing it. But its an extra helping on a very full plate.

I love my mom dearly. But long ago I had to come to terms with how she has NOT been controlling her diabetes. My messing with her about her diabetes was messing up our relationship — despite all my loving intentions. Now the shoe is on my foot — and I realized she at the very least gave me the gift of what NOT to do in diabetes care. But she gives me (and I give her) the gifts of love and compassion and understanding while remaining respectful of each other and how we choose to manage our own care.

I've no clue what will help Deana cope — only that she must find it for herself. I wish you both the very best.

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2009-09-07 22:54:33 -0500 Report

Kellun, it sounds like you have already come to terms with a loving relationship with your mom and hers and your diabetis. My own mom did not have diabetis, but other problems that I TRIED to HELP her with——she died 2 yrs ago at 98 yrs., so guess I did help her some—-but it took a heavy toll on my own emotional health——Looking back I don't know how I could have handled things differently, we each had our own baggage, and like you said, each one just has to work through it on their own emotional timetable. But it does help to know that others have traveled a similar road, it is not just you that cant get it straight or make her happy in whatever situation you might be in. I was an only child, so the weight was heavy, BUT I am thankful that I could do as much as I did! Best of luck and lOVE to all moms and daughters!!! Hugs, Pat r

BeckyJ 2009-09-02 20:20:22 -0500 Report

Been offline for a while dealing with my "Trigger Finger". So glad to hear that things are starting to level out. I wanted to let you know that the post about vial and syringe bein cheaper is true. I used the pens when I first started inulin therapy (samples from doc) but when they were running low and couldn't get me samples anymore I had to switch to vial, they are a quarter of the cost. Also check with the pharmacy about any discount programs they run. My pharmacy offers an additional 30% off to it's members who qualify. Sounds like your daughter would qualify for something like that.

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2009-09-05 20:46:41 -0500 Report

Hmm, I may have to re-read some of these posts on insulin as I will be losing my left kidney next week and no more Metformin, Insulin was mentioned, will have to wait and see how things turn out.

It is great to be back amongst FRIENDS, My hubby is waiting for his supper——-after I have run errands all afternoon, got home from a hospital 75 miles away this MORNING at 11 am. and it is now almost 9pm———-

Later, hugs, Pat r

BLC 2009-09-05 23:58:55 -0500 Report

Pat, I am so sorry to hear you are loosing your kidney. You should be taking it easy and relaxing before your surgery and especially after. Please take care of yourself. You are in my thoughts and prayers friend. I know we are miles and miles apart but let me know if I can help you in any way.

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2009-09-06 14:38:14 -0500 Report

Thank you so much for caring!! I will lose a kidney, but NOT my friends here!!! I can live with one kidney, BUT NOT WITHOUT MY FRIENDS!!! Love and hugs, Pat R

BeckyJ 2009-09-09 17:03:53 -0500 Report

Please take it easy, we all want you be as healthy as you possibly can. Sorry I didn't see this earlier but I will be praying for a speedy recovery and as painless a surgery as possible. Best of Luck!

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2009-09-09 19:44:56 -0500 Report

Thank you so much. When I was in the hospital 5 days last week, I thought of you guys a LOT, felt your support, even tho no one knew where I was—-I took out of here pronto—-had a big Bm that about set me off—could FEEL the energies just draining out of me and the need to see a DR pronto—so did. good thing! Hugs, and thanks—Pat R

Lee J
Lee J 2009-09-10 18:34:00 -0500 Report

pat—i'm so so sorry to hear of yr troubles. i will be thinking & praying for you. you have a great sense of humor—don't let them remove THAT!!! take care.

Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2009-09-10 20:00:27 -0500 Report

Thanks Lee! My surgeon said that he liked my sense of humor too! So it sounds like we are off on the right foot, which is a BIG relief to me as Drs and I have not always seen eye to eye—-some of my OLD hangups which I have now worked through and overcome, Just in time, Praise BE!! PR

DeanasMom 2009-09-01 07:11:57 -0500 Report

Deana just went to Walgreens last night to get a price on her insulin. Its the thing that looks like a pen and you put the tip on, then inject. (this is all new to me). They were so rude to her, acted annoyed that she asked for a quote on it, handed her a print out, which said it would cost her over $400.00!!!! WHAT??!!! She isnt sure if or what is covered by her insurance. She doesnt have the greatest plan in town. Shes going to call them today, but is this for real?!!! How do people afford this stuff, even WITH insurance?.. Im blown away.. I told her to get ahold of the doctor and tell him he needs to find something different that can be afforded by a single mom, waiting tables. For Heaven Sakes!! What a bunch of B.S. now what do we /she do??????

beadmom 2009-09-01 17:08:01 -0500 Report

I know.. Just when you get a grip on one thing… it's another thing.

Drives me nuts some days.


tladybug77 2009-09-01 20:32:44 -0500 Report

Try the doctor's office, my doctor gives out free supplies, including insulin to his patients and when I had a problem with the insurance co. he talked to someone and after that they were great with helping me.

Lee J
Lee J 2009-09-02 17:03:26 -0500 Report

also look into caremark. it's mail order. that's how i get my meds & my supplies. & according to what i've read everyone else saying, if yr daughter manages the diabetes well enuf, she may not need the insulin forever. she may be able to get by on pills. i think they're cheaper.

BeckyJ 2009-08-28 14:24:02 -0500 Report

Chris, I am late to this discussion but I must say CONGRATULATIONS! I was probably one of the negative influences onboard when you were just starting to look at this site and i am truly sorry. I have had so many Bad things happen lately and it just helps me so much to come here and vent. I must say that this place and all of the people on board are amazing. I am now truly grateful for all of the advice and support given. Being diagnosed was extremely difficult for me because I had just watched a very close family member disregard all advice from Doc's and loose his will to fight. I have changed so much over the last couple of years and am now THANKFUL of my DX. It opened my eyes to how I was living my life in a negative way. I had not gone to the Doc for years because I was afraid. Most of my problems could have been caught if I had just paid attention. I have lost 142 lbs to date and while I do take a lot of meds for my conditions I am in better shape today than I was at 16. I pray daily for guidance and have added the people on this site to my prayer list as they are truly a blessing. Good luck in the upcoming battle. I am sure you will have success. God bless you and your family. EDUCATION is strength. Hugs…Becky

Lee J
Lee J 2009-08-28 14:40:29 -0500 Report

you go, girl!! any weight loss is amazing to me, but 142 lbs is stupendous! keep up the good work!

BeckyJ 2009-08-28 14:50:50 -0500 Report

Thanks, the battle was intense but I am now within 30lbs of my BMI. These have been the hardest to lose. I struggle some days but because of my various medical conditions I have to take some meds that make me gain weight. Just staying stable is an acheivement. I gave up many times but I truly feel so much better when I am on my diet that I come right back to it after some pity-party time. My dietician is AMAZING at coming up with practical solutions to my cravings. Can't believe it now but I was at one time 345lbs!

DeanasMom 2009-08-28 22:21:21 -0500 Report

Thanks for your reply. You are truly and inspiration especially for those that are new to this disease. And even a bigger AttaGirl for some tremendous weight loss. I am the biggest procrasinator for excercising and eating right. Maybe now I'll do something!

UPDATE: Deana DID very well at her first "class" with her diabetes facilitator. She learned how to inject herself, and told me that it was so much easier than when she had gestational diabetes 14 years ago. No big syringes, foot long needles, etc. Got a free meter, learned about her meds, tested her BS and she was down from her initial "blow" of 376 to 217. Has a way to go, but she has done this all on her own, with no one to tell her what to do until today. Im just so proud of her.!!! She has changed so much from being depressed, sleeping all the time, irritable, miserable to waking up in a good mood, havent seen that in so long. She calls me twice a day now, and always has something funny or sarcastic which is MY girl!.. She'll be ok,,,

papierce 2009-08-29 11:41:32 -0500 Report

Just finished reading this whole thread. I was diagnosed seven months ago and thought it was the end of the world. Course here I am writing so "news flash" it wasn't the end of the world. ;-)

It's so good to hear she's gotten to the other side of this. I felt the same way Deana did except I was in the hospital for two weeks and not only did they make me eat right, pump me with insulin, they pumped me with happy pills until I came out of it and said I didn't want them any more.

Sounds like she's going to be just fine. I'm excited for you and for her and her daughter.

I don't write much here… just found it about a week ago… however I do a lot of reading here. It's a wonderful supportive site. I'm glad you and your daughter found your way here. God bless…


p.s. What Lee said… :-D

beadmom 2009-08-29 21:41:50 -0500 Report

LOL… I was expecting it and watching like a hawk because it runs rampant on both sides of my family and I was STILL shocked and thought it was the end of the world…


Pat Roth
Pat Roth 2009-08-29 22:34:23 -0500 Report

I am the only one in our immediate family that has diabetis but was aware that my mother's sister's kids and grandkids had it, badly—-on insulin etc. and didn't know if it would "cross the line" or not, it did, so if you are forewarned sometime in earlier years, I would suggest that one start watching the diet then, might avoid some of the shock later—I was still SHOCKED, it just couldn't be—BUT I have been just Borderline for over 50 years, WHY NOW??!! But it has been 3 yrs now, and I am finally accepting, yes, it could, and DID happen to me, and to others. Best of Luck—it does take some adjusting but I KNOW that you can do it!!! hugs, Pat R