Feeling frustrated and hopeless....

By Jlynn Latest Reply 2010-02-27 09:04:35 -0600
Started 2009-06-13 00:35:34 -0500

I just dont got it in me much these days,and I just about give.
Over a year ago my doctor,and a social service worker decided that with my medical,complications due to uncontrolled sugars, ETC.I should stop school and work and learn to take better care of ME.(and my kids,as one is a toddler now whom we are learning sign language etc.) I applied for disability in May08' DENIED i appealed, DENIED.What gets me is that the 2nd time I was eventually ordered to go to a psychologist..??? not a medical doctor but a "SHRINK"
And he really did nt know why I was there either.On thwe last denial letter it said that my condition wasnt bad enough to effect my job skills and so on.??OMG! Iam a CNA(8yrs), and what is more important then having a level headed person taking care of these fragile people? Last year before I quit working,I was starting my day at 5am..my sugars would be anywhere at 200-300 and drop in a matter of hours, to low !!26 was the lowest. It left me feeling out of my mind,forgetful confused and SPACED OUT! By the end of my second work week my toes on my right feet had turned in and stayed tingly numb. The third week they were blueish purple and I wanted to chew them of they hurt so bad, more so when I was off them, or somewhat.
Now I filed another appeal to the judicial judge,and yet im not feeling strong about it either..Im ready to go back to work,,but my body isnt just there yet.
In the mean time I have a 15day notice on the power,and Im looking at 300 negative in my bank account and growing more every day..

Ihave been throwing up from stress over this..its been a strugglr with these bills for a long time,I guess It all finally got to me today when two of my tires blew out on my "car"..and theres another something I dont know if or when I can fix!!
Thanks for letting me vent!

13 replies

Sue Turner
Sue Turner 2010-02-27 09:04:35 -0600 Report

Hi Jlynn,
Sounds like you have a lot on your plate right now…That is a lot to worry about…My prayers are with you; I hope that things get better for you soon…I'm sorry you are in so much pain…I wish there was something I could say or do to help you…Just know that I am here for you… Hugs, and lots of love to you, Sue

Saphire 2010-02-26 23:58:07 -0600 Report

I am now on my second appeal and I hope that this time I receive it. My bs are still out of control and I am on even more medications. I hope that you are able to get your disability.

remiglo 2009-07-09 18:48:01 -0500 Report

Hey Jeri…

How are things going for you? Hoping things have gotten more manageable in your world.

Let us know how you're bg levels are doing.

Saphire 2009-07-08 18:25:38 -0500 Report

I know how hard it is I'm on my first appeal and I got a laywer. I am hoping that I will get my disability soon I need it. The best thing to do is not give up and try to keep fighting. Look in the phone book for a disability lawyer. That's what I have done and I am happy with them. They take care of all the corrospondence from ssa and won't take a cent until they get you set up with ssa. They can also help you with finding help with everything that you need. They told me that I could stand or sit for ix out of eight hour a day when I can barely walk to the bathroom and back and after five minutes on the computer both hands are in pain. I am here if you want to talk.

2009-06-18 22:38:07 -0500 Report

It took my Mom 3 times to get it, and she had ALS. You should contact the power company, in Michigan they can't turn off your power, but that might only be in the wintertime, I'm not sure. Like Roger said, you just need to ask.

cyncyn 2009-06-18 21:47:55 -0500 Report

Boy, how I know how you are feeling! I went thru this myself, not so long ago! Do find an attorney that specializes in Social Security/ Disability. They know all the "loop" holes. I had an attorney and was denied 3 times(after that, she suggested I go back to work. The dr. said absolutely not.She said to ignore the dr,) I changed attorney's and found one that did nothing but SSD. I was denied another 2 times, and on the third go around I won! By this time, I had lost my home, my car, and everything I owned. But I come back up on "top"!! It took some time, but you can do it! You have to have faith in yourself. My reason for doing it, was my children. I'm not going to tell you it was easy, because it wasn't. But it can be done. If you are determined enough, you can do it. This I believe, whole heartedly!!!! Good luck to you and your family. Oh yeah, it never hurts to vent! It can actually help!

lipsie 2009-06-13 23:24:32 -0500 Report

I am VERY sorry to hear of your issues! I know it must be scary and difficult. Like Roger said you could go to Social Services with a shut off notice for help on the electric maybe? I know you may hate to have to do that but sometimes we gotta do what we gotta do. It's not your fault you are having such a hard time with you body and what not. I had this problem to before I got the SSI/ SSD. I could not hold a job really due to my ailments. Don't give up as Gabby said, get a lawyer! It'll happen! Good luck, keep us updated!! *Hugs* Sheila

GabbyPA 2009-06-13 08:13:05 -0500 Report

It is normal for disability to be denied several times. It sucks. What you might want to do it find a lawyer who specializes in disability claims and get them on it. My husband was denied 3 times, a friend of ours was denied I think 3 times also. It is a bear....but keep trying.

I am heartbroken to hear all you are going thru. Is there any family that can help you? Any friends who can be there for you. I know if it weren't for a select few people in my life, I would be history. They help encourage me when I am having rough times.

One thing I do know and that is you can't depend on the government to take care of you and your family. Keep trying for the assistance, but don't ever let that be your only resource. It will fail in the end if you do that. You have to take care of yourself first, then you can care for the kids, then it will fan out and spread to others around you.

Also, right now, not working just means in a regular job. Is there anything you can do on the side to generate some income. I lost my job in 2006 and since I work in the housing industry in a small town...well, my options are slim. So I started working for myself. Doing what I enjoy and picking up odd jobs here and there. I like the flexibility of it, as I am working from home and have more time to be with my family.

I know you have struggled so much this past year. I would be so frightened I wouldn't know what to do. You are at least taking the right steps, and as you go, it will work out somewhere along the line. It might not be what you want, but it will work out. For me, it was bankruptsy, loosing the car and now I am sure we will be loosing our home. But I have alternate plans in place and am always looking for opportunities. Sometimes it takes an extra dose of patience. Sometimes it take honesty with where we are. Just know that your kids need you, and you want to do all you can to be there for them.

roger 2009-06-13 20:16:28 -0500 Report

try for emerg aid ,and food stamps and heap mite beable to help with heat bill or turn off notice? just have to ask . good luck

Jlynn 2009-06-14 02:34:14 -0500 Report

hi …Im glad I vented It felt good and i beleive it lowered my sugars too. well that andd my "angry-frustrated" house cleaning( S)
I have used all the emergency aid for the year, you get one a year…and sold what if any thing I could.
I wish I had the support system of good family and friends.truth is this is the longest time I lived in any place in my life(2.5yrs) and have noone to call in case of!
When we moved back here from GA.I was reminded by a sibling,how unsupported I was.Again. My son was put in foster care during my pregnancy,due to complications to keta. No one was there, and that killed me to see happen.
And I know I need to get a lawyer but I have been exhausted!! daughters ssi .her dr.appts, and her battles to get into a preschool for the deaf and hard of hearing.(which as of fri. we won!!)
So now what ..I dont know..but I have been down before, its just that I m exhausted mentally and physically..nut thanks for all of your well wishes!!
I got a few more days to pay the power so thats a postive, yes?
I will get out and get a support system,

roger 2009-06-18 18:16:00 -0500 Report

you have at least one friend.
( me ) yell any time i am easy to find hear at dc or at my e mail on my profile. any time

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