Do I have reason to be concerned?

By lilleyheidi Latest Reply 2015-01-25 05:51:12 -0600
Started 2015-01-22 01:21:55 -0600

I spoke to a friend today and she told me I'm eating worse than an anorexic, that I am by no means getting enough calories and that I should totally revamp my diet, She went on and on, telling me I have all the symptoms of anorexia, and that I need to see a professional and really made me feel pretty bad about things. Remember I'm 248lbs at this point having lost 97lbs so far and see a dietician and an endocrinologist. My A1c has gone from a 12 something in July to a 5.3 at the end of December.
A typical day of food for me :
breakfast :
1 C lowfat vanilla yogurt
3/4 C berries
romaine lettuce
1 tomato
1/2 cucumber
cheddar cheese
3/4 C Tuna salad
DINNER (last night)
2C shredded zucchini
1C spaghetti sauce with ground beef
small handful of sunflower seeds

At no point during the day was I hungry. I have no rituals or anything regarding my food like I know a lot of anorexics do.
Where was this "friend" coming from?
Help me, or do I need help?
Thanks, Heidi

31 replies

RosalieM 2015-01-25 05:51:12 -0600 Report

If you are losing weight nothing wrong with that diet. You do need more fat in your diet and I don't see any fruit either. It is carbohydrates that cause weight gain, not fat. How about a full fat yogurt. Dieticians go by the American Heart Association and the American Diabetes Associations both of which have been very wrong in the past they have not changed yet. Your body needs some fat and it will not raise your blood sugar or prevent weight gain. Olive oil, coconut oil and butter are good choices. fruit is missing too. Add a little fat and fruit and you will not become nutrient deficient. Some vitamins are fat soluble,
on a very low fat diet, these nutrients are not absorbed. You also need to make sure you get enough meat for vitamin b 12.

MissLady2015 2015-01-24 19:19:19 -0600 Report

I am over weight I need to know how to get my weight down

lilleyheidi 2015-01-25 01:02:24 -0600 Report

I agree with James, High protein, low carb works the best. I've lost close to 100lbs, over 50 in the past 7 months following this plan. If you want to message me privately I'll be happy to talk to you and help you as best as I can. Heidi

jayabee52 2015-01-24 23:41:58 -0600 Report

Howdy Miss Lady
I lost 65 lbs and could have lost more when I followed a high protein, low carb meal plan. When I lost that weight I looked in the mirror and decided I looked gaunt, like a skull covered with skin. I added some fat into my meal plan and it was all good.

I have been on that meal plan for 3 + yrs. I had written it up as a discussion and am willing to share the link with anyone who asks for it.
God's best to you

PINKCAJUN 2015-01-23 13:14:44 -0600 Report


needanickname 2015-01-23 00:17:49 -0600 Report

Heidi, I am not an expert by any means but I am going to school to be a dietician and what I have learned is eat healthy and when You're hungry. But if you are exercising then you need to eat more. Each person is different but your body needs a certain amount of healthy calories to stay fueled and function. Eat as much as you burn unless your trying to lose weight

Stuart1966 2015-01-22 22:52:35 -0600 Report

IF what you are doing is approved of by two professional "white coats", be grateful for your friends concern, but set their fears aside…

If you approach are approved & sanctioned of by two separate people, an RD, and an MD, your friend means well but is unfortunately mistaken. No harm, no foul…

lorlee 2015-01-22 22:28:21 -0600 Report

I think if you are being followed regularly by an endocrinologist AND and registered dietian, then its all good. Getting your A1c down from 12 to 5.3 is a great achievement. Keep up the good work.

valentine lady
valentine lady 2015-01-22 17:49:54 -0600 Report

I used to have an eating disorder and was put on a unit in the hospital for all of us with eating disorders. You are not anorexic.
Atleast by what you told us. Someone anorexic either throws up their food or won't eat at all. If they do eat it's very little. And I mean very little. I would like to see you add a little more protein
to your diet. But otherwise looks good. I agree with the others
that your friend is a little jealous. You need to speak to your Dr.
about the lack of desire to eat. It very well could be the medication. Take care and congrats on the weight loss. Hugs, VL

lilleyheidi 2015-01-22 23:13:45 -0600 Report

I pretty much ignored her comment, but it did scare me a bit. I am on an anti depressant that I think is the culprit for my lack of appetite. Thanks for the support. I appreciate it.

Type1Lou 2015-01-22 12:40:51 -0600 Report

Heidi, what you are doing has enabled you to control your diabetes and lose some weight. You may get to a point where you can eat more, but you have to get there first. IMO, no true friend would berate and browbeat you because of your successes. You have taken control and should be proud of that. Thank your "so-called" friend for her concern and advise her that you are seeing a dietician and an endocrinologist and will defer to their well-qualified advice on your diet…thank you very much…end of discussion. Shame on her for making you feel you're doing something wrong.

lilleyheidi 2015-01-22 23:10:12 -0600 Report

thanks, she's not really a close friend, just one of those ones that you keep around kind of friends. I've been on an anti depressant, that I believe is the culprit for my lack of appetite. I'm planning to bring my food log to show my dietician next time I see her. :)

kimfing 2015-01-22 11:07:46 -0600 Report

I would say you are doing just fine. Friend is jealous lol. I kinda had the same problem with my family and friends except they did not accuse me of having an eating disorder. They said i am not eating enough. They don't live in my house and see what i eat. Trust me i wasn't happy about maintaining 110# @ 5'7". Until i was visiting my family and they actually saw what i ate during the day that they ffinally stopped pestering me. I would say ignore your friend but that's hard, i know. It would really piss me off all the comments i kept hearing

haoleboy 2015-01-22 10:28:05 -0600 Report

You should be proud of what you've accomplished … weight loss is no easy task. People mean well but the vast majority have no clue about nutrition … I certainly didn't.
That's more food than I eat in a day and I am pretty darned healthy and maintaining a 165 pound weight loss.
Your "diet" appears to be a good balance of carbs, proteins and fats and if you're not hungry and feel good , well … just tell your friend that you appreciate her concern but you are under a doctor and dietitians care and they are not concerned.
Keep up the great work!


Nick1962 2015-01-22 10:09:29 -0600 Report

That’s probably a little more than I eat in a day, and I can guarantee you after about 6 years of the diet, I’m at no risk of being anorexic. It took off 120 lbs. but has been pretty stable the last 2 years.

Does your enlightened friend take into consideration your activity level as Gabby mentioned? As we get older and less active we don’t need to same calorie level as a teenager. Obviously, like me, those extra calories are what got us to our weight in the first place. Also, “calories” don’t equal “nutrition”. Congrats on the great weight loss and A1c so far. My non-medical opinion – your friend is nuts.

denipink57 2015-01-22 09:13:10 -0600 Report

dear lilley, you are eating well as far as i am concerned. the only change i would make is to eat some protein with your breakfast. this will avoid you having low bg. just a tablespoon of peanut butter or a scrambled egg or a piece of cheese would do it. if you dont want to eat a protein with your breakfast eat it as a snack between your breakfast and your lunch.

otherwise it looks to me like you are eating well. i am sure your friend means well but an anorexic eats next to nothing and no where near as well as you are.

just keep up the good work. you are doing a good job!


haoleboy 2015-01-22 10:29:56 -0600 Report

the easiest way to increase calories but not carbs (if you should want to) is by eating more fats … cheeses, nuts, butter, eggs, avocados, etc.
just a thought …


GabbyPA 2015-01-22 08:38:42 -0600 Report

If it ain't broke, don't fix it. You have had great success in what you are doing and maybe there is some jealousy there???

Here is what I might suggest. Keep a log book, even if it's just for a week. Count the calories in your meals and snacks and add them up at the end of each day. People have a very warped view of how much food we should be eating. It is way too much that is offered on a daily basis and that skews how we see things.

Anyway if you keep between 1200-2000 calories a day you are in a good range. It also depends on your activity. If you are more active, you can add some calories and still loose weight as long as they are good foods. It sounds like your choices are healthy enough. Obviously, the lower number will help you loose weight while the higher will help you maintain weight. If you are eating below 1000 calories a day, you might want to add some protein or fat.

Have you had the opportunity to meet with a nutritionist or dietitian? I did and she put me on 1200 calories a day and I about died. I can do it now, but back then it was a huge shock to me because I had been used to eating scary amounts of food. I talked to my doctor and we agreed a 1500 calorie goal was good for me to loose weight and yet not be starving and want to jump ship. I have been keeping a journal and so far I am keeping most days between 1200-1500. I have a few higher and even some lower, but I am okay with it.

lilleyheidi 2015-01-22 08:45:08 -0600 Report

Yes, I've met with the dietician, but have just started logging food for the first time in almost six months The past few days have all been under 1000 calories. I'm using myfitnesspal . I'm just not hungry at all, and literally have to force feed myself. I meet with the dietician again sometime the first week or two of Feb, so I'll bring my food log for her to look at. Thanks.

GabbyPA 2015-01-22 09:09:55 -0600 Report

Maybe it's your desire to not eat that has your friend concerned then? That could be cause to take a closer look. Maybe because you don't like to eat now, making sure your calories are in there during those meals might help? Your meeting with the dietitian will get those things sorted out.

Jibber Jabber
Jibber Jabber 2015-01-22 07:49:09 -0600 Report

I just thought I might post everything I ate yesterday to help you see that going super low calorie is NOT the only way to lose weight…

I atkins Mocha shake, with 8oz added unsweetened vanilla almond milk. 2oz of heavy cream, vanilla extract and 1 tablespoon ground flaxseed..

I Atkins Swedish meatball entrée with a green salad (spinach, kale and arugula) with full fat blue cheese dressing..(was very busy yesterday and didn't cook anything all day because of it)..

Dinner…3 ounces of asiago cheese with 3 ounces of pancetta…1/3 of a cup of mixed olives and 1/2 cup pickled (homemade) cauliflower…

Snack one ( handful of walnuts)
Snack two ( one atkins shake with 8 oz of added almond milk and two heaping table spoons of coconut oil)…

I have never added up the calories but I can tell you that my lunch and my snack shake (the one with the coconut oil) together come to about 800 calories…and I am also eating breakfast..dinner and an additional snack…very low carb..and I am dropping weight at the rate of about 10-12 pounds a month..

I am NOT suggesting that you start a similar diet…I am just throwing out there the fact that there are alternatives to such low calorie diets when it comes to weight lose..


lilleyheidi 2015-01-22 07:56:13 -0600 Report

I'm just not hungry, I have to remind myself to eat. I would go with only one meal a day, my salad and tuna, but I know that that is not healthy, so I force myself to eat my yogurt in the morning, and something in the evening. I'm simply not hungry. The idea of eating food literally makes me sick. I dunno.

Pegsy 2015-01-22 13:48:07 -0600 Report

I went through period of a few months, after starting Metformin, that I felt this way. I think I have a pretty normal appetite now. I think you are doing a GREAT job! Please don't allow your friend to discourage you. I can't help but agree with others that there may be some jealousy going here. Is your friend overweight? Is she resistant to taking care of herself as you are? I have had a few confrontations with friends who thought they would offer me dietary advice so that I would agree to frequent the restaurants that they prefer. We don't eat out together anymore. :~(

Jibber Jabber
Jibber Jabber 2015-01-22 08:02:19 -0600 Report

I hear you…the thought oh chewing solid food when I get up in the morning makes me sick so I choke down a shake every morning…

Jibber Jabber
Jibber Jabber 2015-01-22 07:28:04 -0600 Report

YOU HAVE all the symptoms of anorexia…REALLY!!!…I didn't realize that anorexics meal plan and make sure they eat protein at every meal and watch their carbs…boy THAT disease must be a lot more complicated than I originally thought.. .my OPINION on your diet is the following…would I be more comfortable with it if you added 100 calories to each added an additional small snack…YES..conventional wisdom is that it is not healthy to consume less than 1,200 calories a day…that being said, many diet doctors recommend low calorie diets such as yours for the treatment of morbid obesity…(seems ONLY quality people have been morbidly obese as BOTH you and I have been)..I have also read some research online, admittedly not much, that low calorie diets benefit diabetics by resting their beta cells. UNLESS your friend is a nutritionist she should NOT be commenting on your diet unless she has real concerns…which leads me to believe that she does have real concerns… but chicky needs to back off when it comes to issuing a diagnosis…NOW on to the most important thing…the fact that YOU are asking us this questions leads me to believe that YOU think you might be eating too few calories…and the assumption (please forgive me for assuming anything) I make from that is you have never spoken to a dietician about your diet..If at all possible I would do that if I were you…I would like to give you a cyber high five for all your effort and losing as much weight as you have..BUT you do NOT have to go so low calorie to lose weight…I hope this answer helped you…

NewSong53 2015-01-22 05:22:21 -0600 Report

I think that sounds like a healthy diet — wish I was that self-disciplined! If she eats a lot, it might sound severe to her. Also, she might be a little afraid of losing you as a friend if you get too slim or that she'll miss out on "food fests" the two of you might have shared. Don't laugh. I've been through that to some degree, on both sides. We all want our friends to be healthy and happy. On the other hand, a person's insecurities can create anxiety and doubt about the strength of the friendship. When you're the "thin one" the green monster sometimes works to sabotage your efforts to maintain the status quo. Just be aware that it's based on insecurities and has nothing to do with you. You can just let her talk until she runs out of air and then change the subject or be direct and say you appreciate her concern but that you would like for her to let it go.

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