Rough times regardless of being a diabetic!

andy1979
By andy1979 Latest Reply 2014-12-29 15:37:38 -0600
Started 2014-12-26 16:52:51 -0600

As humans we all endure stuff on the physical and mental end of the scale. How much we are able to cope with depends on our strength of character and other characteristics. Fact is that many of us who use this site for support have experienced things that would make others give up, does this make us unique or maybe part of an exclusive club? My answer would be the latter we are survivors and if anything I am grateful that whatever life throws in my direction it makes me stronger. My question is this who or what inspires you to pick yourself up when things become too much?

My answer would be to this question is my friend jane and her son who i see as part of my own family , reason i can tell her anything and vice versa without feeling judged. oh and keeping myself busy , be it me finding stuff to do .


17 replies

RosalieM
RosalieM 2014-12-29 06:10:11 -0600 Report

When it happens to me, and it does, I try to find the answer to what I am doing to myself. I usually do eventually learn what it is and try to change it. That has worked for me over the years. We mostly unknowingly do things to our selves.
So we can correct it when we figure it out. Grandma Rose

sweetslover
sweetslover 2014-12-28 13:30:03 -0600 Report

In general, I just accept things as they are. If they can be improved, I work on it. If not, then worrying about it accomplishes nothing. I pick myself up, dust off my pants, put a smile on my face, and remember that things could ALWAYS be worse.

valentine lady
valentine lady 2014-12-28 12:22:58 -0600 Report

Hi Andy,
As friend of mine said "People are people. "☺ I do believe that
to be true. Each has he or she's own way to bring one's own self
up.when the things get to be to much, i now go to my better half
AFTER I've worked it out for myself. He is my best friend, I trust him
completely, but I still need to rely on me. I will always rely on myself. But my fiancee' is my inspiration.

Gabby
GabbyPA 2014-12-28 09:58:53 -0600 Report

My self knowing that I must do more because no one can do it for me. I need the support of friends and family to help me along, but I alone have to do what I know I need to do. Sometimes it's a lonely place, but usually I have some good sounding boards to help me out.

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2014-12-28 12:29:15 -0600 Report

Are you saying you need support of family and friends because you fear being self reliant? What would you do if your friends and family decided they have had enough of being a sounding board or being supportive?

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2014-12-27 16:56:45 -0600 Report

I think people are people. There are weak and strong people. The strong can survive most things thrown their way. The weak are the neediest because they need people to tell them what they should be doing or guiding them down the road.

The fact that I value my health and am self motivating keeps me going. I have always been self reliant. I don't need a website, or expect others to motivate me. I am not a doom and gloom person.

I don't care if people judge me. What they think is not all that important to me if they are not friends or family and even then, it isn't all that important. I have never understood why people concern themselves with being judged or with what people say about them. I don't care what people say about me as long as it is the truth. Lying on me is the biggest mistake a person can make because I will call you out on it.

I think if people took responsibility for themselves and their health they would have less problems. Diabetes is not the end of the world. The key is to keep hope alive. Become the Little Engine That Could. Diabetes is not the main focus in my life. It does not bother me that I have it. I live life to the fullest and don't sit around hating it, wanting to give up or stop taking care of myself. I don't feel sorry for people who do that. I prefer people who are strong minded and can keep going no matter what is thrown in their path.

valentine lady
valentine lady 2014-12-28 09:44:37 -0600 Report

Hi Joyce,
love what you had to say. Couldn't have said it better myself. I am a strong woman also. I have come to DC before with problem or two. But, basically I work out my own problems. I support all you had to say. I say "You go girl…" ☺

andy1979
andy1979 2014-12-28 07:56:57 -0600 Report

TOTALLY AGREE WITH A LOT OF WHAT YOU SAID, THANK YOU ! THINK MANY MORE PEOPLE SHOULD LEARN TO TALK MORE SENSE LIKE YOURSELF .

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2014-12-28 12:33:41 -0600 Report

Andy you have to live in the real world and have common sense. Look at life realistically. There are no quick fixes. You have to think outside of the box because if you think inside of it, you limit your ability to think. If you can't think, you can't change and if you can't change, you never move forward.

lilleyheidi
lilleyheidi 2014-12-28 03:11:50 -0600 Report

Joyce, I really have to say I admire your attitude a lot. I've always considered myself in that "weak" category. Very needy. Can't really do much on my own. A semi-helpless woman. I've spent the last five months working on my attitude, it's by no means where I want it to be, but it's changing. When my friend died in June, I decided no one is going to make me better but me. No therapist, no doctor, and certainly no friend. I started to get off the pity pot. (not so easy when you have bipolar) I choose to not make excuses for myself anymore (not always, sometimes i still do, and I try to catch those times), I choose to take care of my own health and educate myself so I can talk to my doctors and make smart decisions jointly with them. I choose to do things that are in MY best interest. Someday I hope to grow up a bit. Thanks for being the woman you are, and being an inspiration to me. HUGS, Heidi

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2014-12-28 12:48:16 -0600 Report

Heidi, my sister always says being a helpless woman is time consuming for others and expensive.

I am sorry you lost your friend. You are correct, no therapist, doctor or friend is going to make you better but you. Smart friends give you tools so you can stop being codependent on them. I don't allow my friends to be codependent on me.

I have a friend who was like that until one day I told her to grow up. She would call me every time she had to make a decision. I would ask her don't ask me what you should do, just do it. This woman couldn't buy clothing without approval. I took her to the mall and made her try on clothing and would not give an opinion. She ran out of window washing solution and I made her open her hood and put it in herself. Now she doesn't call me being needy because she knows I won't allow it.

Weak people who depend on friends an family can drain all of their energy. Over time they get tired of if but may not want to say something to avoid hurt feelings. I am not the one. If hurting feelings makes someone open their eyes, and learn to stand on their own two feet then something has been accomplished. I am never going to allow someone to drain all of my energy because of their neediness.

You said someday you hope to grow up. Why can't it be today? I suffered from depression for years until one day I woke up an decided Okay I have had enough of this. My therapist helped me make the necessary changes and walked down the road with me. I have been off medication for almost 15 years. I learned to face life for what it is and solved problems as they arose. I chose to not depend on people. I know bipolar people an some function very well with it because they have a positive outlook on life. Things are hard or not easy if you choose to make them that way.

I know you can do this. I believe you can. Huggs back to yoiu.

Jibber Jabber
Jibber Jabber 2014-12-27 09:50:54 -0600 Report

God…and my children and grand children…and as much as I love my children and grand children it is MOSTLY God…I know that I was put on this earth for a higher purpose, as we all were…I wasted many years of my life not trusting in God..and when you don't trust him..you generally live in fear…fear of what will happen if you take a risk..fear of not being good enough at something…and fear of so many other things..I bit the bullet two years ago and enrolled in college..I have a 3.8 GPA..would of been higher but well I fell asleep in music class one to many times and had to take a B..I know God has plans for me..mostly because of my long history of Domestic violence..I am convinced THAT is why I have been given the gift of communication…of writing and being able to speak and relate to people…I ran from my God's ordained purpose for too long..I was studying to be a teacher..a noble profession, but it never felt "right" inside..because it is what I chose and not what God was calling me to do…Now I am studying Social services..so I can help those with similar backgrounds..if I DON"T take care of myself…who will help take care of them…everyone has a calling..it is just that most of us do not acknowledge it…search your heart..what is it that you want to do?? It could be as simple as helping once a week at a food pantry…or it can be logging on to diabetic connect everyday to encourage people who are having a difficult time…or it can be as complex as finding the cure for cancer…take care of yourself…so you can do God's work here on earth..

lilleyheidi
lilleyheidi 2014-12-27 01:59:02 -0600 Report

I always have my faith that I rely on, it has helped me through many rough storms. I trust it will help me through many more. This past year, I've come to rely on myself. There is a lot more I can do for myself than I ever thought possible. HUGS Heidi

RebDee
RebDee 2014-12-26 16:58:22 -0600 Report

I know this may sound strange but my two dogs, Artemus Gordon my 10 year old Labra-Dane, and Marcus Gordon, my 5 year old Bishi-Poo, give me unconditional love which I try to pay forward to everyone that I meet. When I talk to them, they listen and if they feel that I need it, they give me their paw or a lick. It is comforting.

RebDee
RebDee 2014-12-29 15:31:33 -0600 Report

God is also my help, mentor, friend, spiritual guidance. Before, I mentioned my dogs. Well dog is God spelled backwards. Perhaps the reason for that is that my dogs are a great help when it comes to grief, stress, sadness.
I really believe the ANT song, "pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again."

sweetslover
sweetslover 2014-12-29 08:09:52 -0600 Report

Talking to your dogs does not sound strange to me. I even talk to my horses. They know some of my deepest secrets.

RebDee
RebDee 2014-12-29 15:37:38 -0600 Report

And I don't have to worry as they don't tell anyone else.
I have had many dogs during my married life, all whose names end in US because they were a part of us. There was Barnabus, Barabus, Dreyfus, Phyllus, Artemus, Marcus, Lucus, Cannibus, Perfectus, Zephyrus. Spelling was fixed but it worked. Next one will be Plexus (because I use Plexus Health Products). Ok, so I'm crazy about dogs.

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