My Story(Bre)

By BreC Latest Reply 2014-12-29 08:40:38 -0600
Started 2014-12-23 11:51:25 -0600

I had to think long and hard to decide if I wanted to share my story. I have picked myself up and moved on from some of the horrible things that I went through and place a lot of faith in God for helping me continue to live a better life.
After 13 years of marriage I caught my husband and best friend in my bed together. About the same time my mother was run over while crossing a street in the town where she lives. My father witnessed this and it was horrific for him. The guy that hit mama ran a red light and said he didn't know he had hit anyone until her shoe hit his windshield. Mama was in a coma for 9 weeks and had to relearn everything. While I was at the hospital with my mother I got word that my husband was staying with the so called best friend. I still hold a grudge toward them both and will probably always do so…
Then in 1988 I was sharing an apartment with a friend. My x-husband knocked on my door. I answered it and was raped by him. I did not report him because I didn't want my kids to go through that.
In 2004 my father passed away and everything that I had gone through overwhelmed me and I had a nervous breakdown. I was in a hospital for 4 weeks. They wanted me to stay longer but I checked myself out and went home.
Now I cherish the husband I have. He has been a Godsend. He loves me unconditionally and I the same to him.
I will never trust people the same but am working on that. I try not to be at the same place as my x and his other but sometimes that is not possible. When I have to be around them I avoid them.
Life for me is my husband, my mother, my grandkids, my health and God. Anything and anyone else is a second thought.

12 replies 2014-12-29 08:40:38 -0600 Report

BreC I could just imagine the pain and turmoil your mind body and soul has gone through, but God allowed you to be a testimony for others and I thank you for sharing.I was reading Prayer for the power of Women and it said "By faith I receive emotional healing, and thank you for giving me the grace to stand firm until the process is complete. And God said Whom the Son has set free is free indeed. You are free and healed mind, body and soul so I say that to say this I'm proud of yo for telling your story.
Much Love and Blessing.

NewSong53 2014-12-28 08:26:33 -0600 Report

I am so sad for your experience — I don't know how I would have survived so many deep hurts and you are amazingly resilient. God has blessed you with a wonderful husband and time will heal. One thing I've begun to learn — just very recently in fact — is that it does no good to rethink the past. For many years I thought I could make sense of events and could put the past to rest. The memories kept me in pain. Being around people who have caused me pain trashes my feelings of worth especially when they do not treat me with common courtesy or respect. I've found that when I'm around people like that, I focus my affection and attention on others and they can't ruin my fun and I don't miss events just because they're around. And I've learned that by focusing on the good in my life and distracting myself everytime I begin to dwell on the past, pretty soon it gets easier and easier! Focus on things you enjoy, love on the people who love you, focus on your gifts and take it to God . . . only He completely understands and knows the hearts of all involved . . . leave the judgment to him and ask for His help in changing your heart and your mind (always works for me). Good luck and stay strong!

elizag1 2014-12-26 09:52:56 -0600 Report

You are a strong lady and, I think you need to put yourself on the list too, walk, plan healthy meals and, I Pray for you..your really amazing and have courage to post this.
One day at a time they say..

jayabee52 2014-12-24 07:21:10 -0600 Report

Howdy Bre

Sounds like you have had a rough life. My fiancee' Valentine lady has had a life which was rough too.

I am glad to hear that things are better for you now and you have a husband that you love and trust. (am trying to do the same for VL)

God bless you and yours


lilleyheidi 2014-12-24 03:04:15 -0600 Report

Bre, thanks so much for choosing to share your story, I know how hard that must have been. You are a beautifully, strong woman. I'm not sure I could have survived some of the things you did. Although I have had a few similar experiences, someday we'll have to chat privately.
Learning to trust takes time, be patient with yourself. Happiest of Christmases to you and have a healthy 2015. HUGS, Heidi

tabby9146 2014-12-23 18:54:49 -0600 Report

Glad things are good now and you have a good husband, you have your mother, and other family. I would not trust either for many years, I know how I am and I would definitely be the same way. I am the type of person that doesn't even trust most people much anyway. I have learned not to but in marriage, you need to and you are working on that, like you said, and see improvements, so you will get there.

BreC 2014-12-23 13:25:36 -0600 Report

Life sometimes throws us into a tailspin but in the end we are left stronger. I know that I need to trust a little more and am working on that. When I look back I try to remember the good and the great people who have helped enrich my life and pray for those who are guided by evil. I do still have a bit of a wall built up and am working on that too. I count myself as a better person than my x and his other. Lessons learned

GabbyPA 2014-12-23 12:55:22 -0600 Report

I think I would have totally lost my mind after all of that kind of thing. It's amazing how we make it through things like this, and come out on the other side stronger, smarter and better people.

tabby9146 2014-12-23 18:52:39 -0600 Report

I think I would have too Gabby. I have had trials and some hard things to go through, but not those same things. My dad passed away from cancer when I was only 22, and then in a few short years, I lost both of my grandmothers while still in my 20s and I was so close to them all. Those were the very first "real" big things to deal with, the most stressful, sad times and others to follow. They made me stronger for sure. and whenever you go through things like that, they usually do make one stronger and you learn from the trials of life. My faith grew stronger too.

RosalieM 2014-12-23 12:38:55 -0600 Report

What a tragic story! I could tell a story too, but choose not to. Many years ago I decided to live only in the present moment and the near future. My mind is at peace because of that decision. To repeat my story of the past is to relive it.
Once was enough for me. You can choose to put even the most tragic story in the past and leave it there. Most people don't know that is possible. I learned it is for me and can be for you too. My holiday wish for you is to put that story in the past. Today is the first day of the rest of your life. You can make it what ever you want to be. Make it good!

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