Just Can't get Motivated to Change

By LadyLouAnn Latest Reply 2014-05-15 22:00:13 -0500
Started 2014-05-06 22:30:53 -0500

First off if you are going to give me crap..don't bother. I'm finding all of this too much. I hate the idea of restrictions and most of these bad things happen 10 to 20 years of abusing yourself. I have been trying to find stories of people who got real sick or ill in the first couple of years and zip..nada. Can't find them. I can find lots where people started getting complications after 8 to 20 years.
It's darn cold all the time here and I don't feel the urge to freeze my butt off walking outside.
I'm being honest and I'm not lying so don't give me "poop" it only peeves me. I really need to know what has happened to those in the first 5 years that was bad.
I also hate playing Russian roulette with Metformin, wondering if this meal will send me to the toilet for 3 hours
I liked when I was losing weight without trying. Now I'm not losing weight , I've gained weight. This is bull crap. I'm so tempted to just ignore it all.

36 replies

artqween 2014-05-15 22:00:13 -0500 Report

The stress u feel is understandable. However be advised a stroke possibility,
though. Why r u so angry?? Hey btw

kathrync 2014-05-11 21:02:51 -0500 Report

Try to get your doctor to take you off of metformin and put you on victosa… It will help with the diarrhea . I am 50 years old… I have many things wrong with me including herniated disc in my back, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, diabetes and knee and feet problems… All that can be either fixed or controlled if I could lose about a hundred pounds… So I do know how you feel … Good luck with your progress and don't give up!

Shawn Grant
Shawn Grant 2014-05-10 09:01:42 -0500 Report

My dad was in great health in his 20's and 30's. He was very good at basketball and an excellent baseball pitcher. He was so good, in fact, the Pittsburgh Pirates scouted him and had him tryout. In his late 40's he was on disability with heart disease, kidney issues, loss of feeling and poor eye sight. All caused by diabetes. At a young age of 54 he died of a heart attack, influenced by years of high blood sugar.

My dad was diagnosed in the late 70's and died in the early 90's. Back then they did not know how important maintaining normal blood sugar was for a diabetic. They even wanted blood sugar to be a little high to prevent hypoglycemia. They also did not really equate carbohydrates with sugar. DR just told my dad not to eat sweets and he didn't.

Diabetes is a disease that is treated with personal responsibility. Medication only has a minor impact on blood sugar. Diet and exercise has the bulk. The diet is the toughest. We have a metabolic disorder that requires an abnormal and severe reduction in carbohydrate intake. Most diabetics can only handle 30 to 50 grams of carbs, not per meal, but PER DAY! Most people freak out when they hear that. It's tough to manage that, especially eating out and social events.

My motivation comes from watching my dad decline then die. Will I keep it up? Time will tell. Who knows if I just give it up 3 or 6 years down the road. It's a lot of work and when at a party or eating out with friends it is just easier to eat harmful food instead of low carb. Much of the time low carb options are not available. No one understands my diet choices including other diabetics. Most diabetics thinks it is fine for sugar to spike to 160 after a meal. I don't. I do feel alone.

jayabee52 2014-05-10 13:27:20 -0500 Report

Shawn, 30 to 50 gm of carbs per day seems a bit restrictive. The current per meal carb suggestion for diabetes is 30 to 45 gm for females and 45 to 60 gm for males. Of course that figure should be arrived at by a discussion with your Dr or Registered Dietician (RD).

Shawn Grant
Shawn Grant 2014-05-10 14:05:26 -0500 Report

I know the ADA recommends 30 to 45 grams of carbs per meal. I think they are full of it and are killing people with their recommendations. I have never heard of a diabetic who can have a 1/4 of their plate with a starch, total meal 45 grams of carbs and be able to have normal blood sugars 1/2 hour, 1 hour, 2 hours, 3 hours or even 4 hours after a meal. I am sure there are a few out there but it is rare. Having blood sugar at 120 to 150 is unacceptable. I demand that my blood sugar is between 85 and 95 at all times. If my DR or dietitian don't agree then I will get new ones.

Nick1962 2014-05-10 19:04:01 -0500 Report

Being pretty retentive about my management, I was right there with you Shawn until the “I demand that my blood sugar is between 85 and 95 at all times”. Demanding it is one thing, but achieving it another. I’d like to know specifically how and IF you actually do. I can maintain 86 for a good long while (actually that’s my typical morning fasting number) and can average 95 for the day, but there is no way I can manage a mere 10 point spread without severe micromanagement.

jayabee52 2014-05-10 15:27:17 -0500 Report

that is your perogative Shawn, how you deal with your medical team.

I do not "1/4 of [my] plate with a starch". I don't. eat simple carbs (most starches) There are carbs in veggies and fruits as well, so there are. to my mind, a lot of nutrition in the veggies and some low carb fruits, so they are not to be ignored to get good nutrition. I would suggest that BG levels between 85 and 95 at ALL times is rather restrictive.

What are your fasting BG levels before you eat breakfast?

Shawn Grant
Shawn Grant 2014-05-10 21:51:56 -0500 Report

My fasting is 85 and it typically doesn't get above mid 90's after meals. It is tightly controlled within a 10mg range. There are a few diabetics that can do better. I agree there are carbs in veggies. However those are slow acting carbs. Broccoli, cabbage, spinach, Brussels sprouts, squash and others have some carbs but are essential for nutrients. I eat those. I don't eat grains, many root veggies (though some are fine), fruit, milk, and of course sugar (sweets). My sugar is controlled by food selection and exercise.

haoleboy 2014-05-10 13:58:36 -0500 Report

aren't the same people that are recommending high per meal carb counts also saying that an A1c of 7.0 (or even 6.0) is acceptable? A blood glucose level known to cause complications.

Shawn Grant
Shawn Grant 2014-05-11 06:33:09 -0500 Report

Haoleboy, you are absolutely right. For most of the 20th century doctors, ADA, and general medical institution was afraid of hypoglycemia and rightly so. Hypoglycemia can kill. The ADA recommended a meal plan that was high in carbs (high for diabetic) to prevent hypoglycemia.

In the mid 90's there was ground breaking studies that showed that normal blood sugar level prevented and in some cases reversed complications. Those studies showed the importance of normal blood sugar and normal means non-diabetic blood sugar range 70 to 110. Also there are numerous studies that show normal blood sugars are achieved by ultra low carbohydrate meals. It is the only way to achieve normal blood sugar. Even the ADA host peer reviewed studies that shows this on their own website. Dispute these studies the ADA, most doctors, dietitians and patients are stuck in the 80's.

As far as hypoglycemia, that is something to take seriously. Always carry a glucose meter and sugar tablets with you. Monitor your sugar levels closely and take carbs in controlled dosage that bring your sugars quickly back to normal.

Normal blood sugar and an a1c below 6 should be the goal in order to be healthy.

GabbyPA 2014-05-08 08:03:19 -0500 Report

First off, if your metformin is causing you issues after more than a few weeks on it, it's time to change meds. Most people build up a tolerance for it, but some don't and you don't need that obstacle in your face every day. Have you spoken with your doctor about some alternatives?

I liked it when I was loosing weight too. I liked it a lot. I am like you now, gaining and it's so frustrating. Do I choose my insulin for better control or do I skip it to keep from weight gain? Oh, the right answer for me is to exercise more. Sounds easy right? Not always. I liked it better when my effort didn't require so much commitment.

I started with complications and figured I had diabetes for the 3-4 years I was without a doctor before I got brave and tested for myself. I had neuropathy and that was what made me test. My feet were bothering me. I have been blessed that the complications have stopped there so far, but I am sure they will rear their ugly heads.

I did ignore mine one summer a couple of years ago. I was so incredibly frustrated with everything about it. I just said forget it....and I did. Until I spent my days and nights in the bathroom. It was awful. I couldn't stay awake in the afternoons, like it was before I knew I had it. It sucked, because I realized that ignoring it didn't make it go away and to be honest, the lifestyle was incredibly inconvenient. I tested and I was over 400 and that scared me enough to stop ignoring it.

JaredLahti 2014-05-07 22:45:30 -0500 Report

I will preface my story with the fact that I have had epilepsy since I was a child, but the consequences of my not taking care of my diabetes were very real. I was diagnosed 5 years ago and had it under control. I relaxed and started partying, which led to me having a convulsive seizure within 3 months. After that I gained 60 lbs which complicated my diabetes control. I have had 2 other seizures since then and the common factor was that my blood sugar was in the 300s each time. So moral of this story is that if you have any other medical problems, not controlling the diabetes will wreak havoc on those. So yes you may not notice the bad stuff that diabetes is doing to you, but if you keep it in check you will notice how much better you will feel. I can tell you that since I have taken my problems seriously I have lost that 60 lbs. I may have diabetes but it does not run my life. I do triathlons, running, weight lifting and I am fairly consistent with my meals. This has given me more energy and made me a feel a lot better about myself as well.

LadyLouAnn 2014-05-07 19:50:13 -0500 Report

I just found this blog post about how long it takes to develop complications from T2 diabetes.
Food for thought..very interesting

jayabee52 2014-05-08 14:09:44 -0500 Report

So, LouAnn, what to you think about this blog and what it says?

LadyLouAnn 2014-05-09 21:22:21 -0500 Report

Well it's gonna be a couple of years before I have any complications. That's what I got out of it.

jayabee52 2014-05-10 13:31:06 -0500 Report

OK that may be true, however would it not be the wisest course to stay as far away from the complications as possible? That would mean taking care of one's diabetes and keeping the BG levels in the "normal" range?

Glucerna 2014-05-07 22:09:23 -0500 Report

There have been many powerful stories shared her in response to your post, and I hope that they're helping you find the motivation to take care of yourself. I read a quote today that perhaps you'll find inspiring: “If you are faced with a mountain, you have several options.
You can climb it and cross to the other side.
You can go around it.
You can dig under it.
You can fly over it.
You can blow it up.
You can ignore it and pretend it’s not there.
You can turn around and go back the way you came.
Or you can stay on the mountain and make it your home.”
― Vera Nazarian, The Perpetual Calendar of Inspiration
~Lynn @Glucerna

jigsaw 2014-05-08 20:23:32 -0500 Report

Uh oh, you're are starting to sound like you just got out of the marines! LOL! Actually, I think it's excellent, motivating point of view.

number 2
number 2 2014-05-07 15:45:38 -0500 Report

don't push yourself to hard, I have only been diagnosed with type 2 for a year, and at first I was freaked out. occasionally I get the urge to give up myself, but hang in there it is rough for a while. It is a life style change, so it isn't easy I don't care what anybody says. If you make a mistake, and eat something you shouldn't start over, and try again that's the best advise I can give. God bless and good luck

dagger1234 2014-05-07 13:40:15 -0500 Report

I'm newly diagnosed so I don't have a story but I will tell you about my aunt, uncle (moms side)and their son who has diabetes and didn't take care of their conditions. Both my aunt and uncle are doing dialysis now about 3 times a week. Their son is 34 years old and after 6 or 8 years, his vision started to deteriorate. He is now blind even after eye surgery. I talked to him yesterday and he is just destroyed emotionally and physically. He wants me and my brother to take better care of our health. I'm trying to and I know it's hard but now it's either take care of it now or suffer in the end.

I have another 2 uncles (dad's side). One had a massive stroke and has never recovered. His whole left body is destroyed and shut down. The other uncle does okay but still eats like crap. What I'm saying is obviously diabetes run in both sides of my family. My cousin told me diabetes is one of the worse diseases out there. It can come bite you in the butt soon or it'll slowly creep up on you. Don't play with the disease and start slowly to take care of yourself. I know it's easier said than done; but find a group and exercise with them. Get some work out DVDs, get out.

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2014-05-07 10:52:11 -0500 Report

HI LadyLouAnn,

I just want to say hi and offer you some support. I can tell that you are feeling really frustrated right now. I'm glad you reached out for support. And I see you are getting some great replies. You are not alone.

Not sure if you have read any of the articles here that relate to diabetic burnout but I am wondering if you might be interested. Here is a link to a whole bunch of articles that you might find useful:


Keep in touch with us. Let us know what's going on with you. And take good care of yourself, my friend.


Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2014-05-07 09:30:02 -0500 Report

Lou I worked in a rehab hospital. We had a man come in who lost his leg to diabetes. He said he was in a diabetic coma for three weeks. He said the doctor told him when he came in unconscious with blood sugar in the 600's the doctor said they almost put him in the lucky to be alive department. He went in with two legs came out with one. He totally ignored his diabetes for over a year.

All he did was what you are doing. Being frustrated and angry over a disease you can control if you talk to your doctor, dietitian and make changes that will work for you. This man was finally able to go home with his prosthetic leg. Nine months later he was back again with the other leg now gone. He went right back to his old ways and his wife said he would not listen to anyone including his doctor. He was now on dialysis. He died the day before he was released from the hospital. He played Russian Roulette with his life and lost.

You want to know what I did the first 5 years, I took care of myself. I listened to my doctor because we communicated. We discussed my health and I made informed decisions. I talked to the pharmacist about every medication I had to take. I counted every carb that went into my mouth and tested after each meal. I learned what would cause me to spike and what didn't. I walk every day weather permitting.

You say you don't want to hear any poop because it peeves you off. I don't care if you get peeved off with me. You can be as peeved off as you want to be but that is not going to make diabetes any better for you. You say this is bull crap. For you it is because you create much of the problems you have then come here to vent. You have been told by several people to talk to your doctor and your dietitian. If you have not done that you can only blame yourself. As your health deteriorates and it will and they pull the sheet over your face and bury you six feet down, I wonder just how peeved off you will be about that. You have a choice you can take care of yourself and be happy and healthy or you can continue down this road and be angry and frustrated and end up in worse shape than you are now. The choice is yours.

diabeticdummy 2014-05-07 02:07:02 -0500 Report

ok Lady, here it goes a little history first im 40 i have abused my body physically with hard work 15-18 hours a day 6 days a week for 20 plus years i ate once a day and drank soda, sweet tea, juice all day long we are talking gallons a day i have been on water and unsweet tea for almost 2 years now so here is my story. I was diag a1c 13.4 t2 sept 2012 in oct 2012 was in icu dka for 2 weeks had very very very bad yeast infection the antibiotic i was on shut my kidneys down normal when i went into hospital kidney function was .74 on anti biotic it went to 3.7 in 2 days dialasis is 4 i was very close, luckely my kidneys went back to normal after 3 months left hospital in nov 2012 ate good to meds like was told yes metformin is nasty stuff in my body too then went on glumetza same thing didnt eat cause i hate living on the crapper was taken off it and put on insulin only 6-9 shots a day 500-700 units a day u-100 insulin did good till may of 2013 then was sick of shots and insulin was making me sick so i go discuraged and fell off the wagon. july 2013 ended up in icu again dka bg 1100 spent 34 days and 3 operations for a huge absess in my butt crack (yeah go ahead laugh) it hurt like a bitc# it was so big a man could put his fist in it and open his hand flat and never touch me wound vac for 5 months was taking meds like told to do from aug till dec had 4th surgery to fix a fistula that formed surgery didnt work feb 2-12 had 5 th surgery to remove iv hard line to my heart cause have been on tigasil antibiotic for 11 months was getting better then all hell broke loose again and was pissed cause i was doing what doctors i have 7 of them 6 appt a week feb-mar 2014 had 6th surgery and butt camera found i have three fistulas i drain all day long it sucks they installed basically rubber bands to try and get rid of fistulas forget what its called my wife remembers all that as i am on so much pain meds and mussel relaxers im sedated most of the time but at least im home mar went on the pump u-500consentrated insulin my last a1c was 6.7 i use about 50-70 units of insulin a day and feel better i still have 1-2 more surgery to go but hopefully thall fix me and ill be done now my endo told me about a new med she wants to put me on and it is like metformin but supposedly no side effects and helps loose the weight instead of putting it on will know the name of it next week when i see her again but i finally learned that my wife has been by my side 300% i have a new grand baby i need to be around so with her help and the advise help stories ive read on dc mind you i have only been here since jan 2014 life is worth it and ive overcome death from this disease 2 times now yes i still have issues but i caused them and now im fixing them i used to be cocky and said if i die i die well thinking about it and being that close i have to say i am a wuss and was realy scared but the lord is fixing me and ive learned to do what i need to to stay heathy as we have a farm and its hard work have help now but with a bad winter and ny issues its harder for me and my wife works 12 hour shifts 5 days a week as a sheriffs deputy then comes home takes care of my wounds and helps around the farm so i have to say see deserves a vacation as she is way overworked but she wants me better and around for awhile so in 2 yrs its been hell but i see the light and the end of the tunnel 2 more months and i should be ok and i will do what i need to to not go thru any of that ever again hopefully this helps i know it helped me to share my tale of t2 over 2 yrs hopefully the next 40 yrs are great oh yeah forgot to tell you since eating right and getting bg controlled have lost 106 lbs as of friday at doctors visit.

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2014-05-07 09:45:33 -0500 Report

Wow. You have come a long way. Congrats on the weight loss. The day I was diagnosed 7 years ago, I went to a National Night Out event. Our Community Relations Sgt. took one look at me and knew something was wrong. I was so upset I was near tears. Another friend asked what was wrong and he told him. He said I have been T2 for 10 years, so you have diabetes, what are you going to do about it? He asked me if I had eaten anything and I said I don't know what to eat so all I have had is water. He went and got me a burger and some popcorn. He told me to learn to count carbs and that I could eat a lot of things as long it wasn't high in carbs. He was the one who told me to ask my doctor how many carbs I could have per meal. The sarge asked me what I was going to do. I said stay here for awhile then go back home. He said no you are hanging with me tonight. We went to every National Night Out event in our police district and had some fun.

I never looked back. I learned all I could learn. I ate properly, I started losing weight and since the screw up with the nutritionist, I have kept the weight off. I am involved in my community. I make and sell jewelry at fairs and festivals and I enjoy life.

Diabetes does not to have to be hard, it doesn't have to be a struggle and it doesn't have to be frustrating. It will be all of that if you don't take responsibility for your health and your life. Everyone has some kind of problems in life but it is how you handle them that makes life better.

I agree with you I need a vacation. I say lets get on a cruise ship and do nothing but relax.

haoleboy 2014-05-06 23:52:53 -0500 Report

I was diagnosed 7 years ago and my complications started after about 3 years … so far … lost the sight in one eye … had a stroke … have neuropathy in my legs bad enough that I have trouble walking.
The day to day hassle of diabetes is tough, I get that, but nothing compared to dealing with the complications.
That said, I consider my self lucky to have survived my stroke and I am thankful every day that I get to "struggle" with this disease … it sure as hell beats the alternative.


Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2014-05-07 10:45:16 -0500 Report

HI Steve,

I appreciate your honesty here. Avoidance of the complications can be a really good motivator to keep you on the path.


Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2014-05-07 09:06:54 -0500 Report

Steve i always say any day above ground is a good day no matter what problems any of us may be having in life. I know we have not always seen eye to eye and you have said I offended you which has never been my intention. Yes you have other medical problems but more importantly you are here with us to share your insight and wisdom. I may not respond or have liked things you have said. Sometimes the like thingy doesn't work for me, but I always read what you say. Stay strong and live long.

jigsaw 2014-05-07 05:14:50 -0500 Report

Now that's getting straight to the point. Definitely food for thought as far as I'm concerned! I have a suspicion that it is better to play
Russian roulette with Metformin, then to play it with ones life.

LouAnn, Steves' story speaks for many! A wise person will heed a wise mans advise!

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2014-05-07 11:30:07 -0500 Report

Jigsaw, a lot of people play Russian Roulette with their lives. Unfortunately, it is easier for some people to do nothing and be frustrated, angry or hate their disease than to take care of themselves. You simply can't put your issues on everyone's shoulders and do nothing. Creating our own problems can be far more detrimental for us than having the problem created by outside sources. Self destruction is harmful to ones own health and life. Steve went straight to the point.

jayabee52 2014-05-06 23:25:15 -0500 Report

LouAnn Go ahead and vent.

We all get frustrated at times with the restrictions potentially imposed upon us be this disease. We may even rebel a bit and go off our restrictions for a bit, but those of us who know the potential pain, distress and danger of Diabetes Mellitus (DM) poses to us will get back on the horse and start back to managing our DM as best we can.

Yes we can go into denial, and ignore our DM, but we do that to our own peril, as I have found out to my chagrin. I have the pain of diabetes neuropathy 24/7/365, I have that because for a while I was in denial or ignored my DM for too many years, and didn't properly take care of myself.

For that reason I also have End Stage Renal Disease for which I need to undergo dialysis treatments three days a week for 4 hrs a treatment, and additionally I have on top of my diabetes restrictions on carbs, I also now have to restrict my phosphorus, potassium, sodium, and fluids if I want to have any kind of health at all.

It does get overwhelming at times, but truth be told, I am just thankful to God that He has allowed man to think up machines like the dialysis machine to clean my blood and do the job which my kidneys are no longer able to do.

Oh I could put myself on the road to a quicker death by stopping my dialysis treatments, but as I found out in Jan 2013, the process of dying that way is terrible as the poisons built up in my bloodstream just before I started dialysis again. Any little effort I made, even strolling an eighth of a mile, would wear me out where I had to sleep for hours. Or if I ate or drank anything, I would try to throw it up. I really don't want to know how bad it could get in the later stages of untreated kidney disease.

So I understand, Louann, your frustration with your DM, probably more than you know, cause I have the same kinds of frustrations. But I am also thankful to God that I have been given a way to manage my DM and the other complications I have.

God's best to you and yours

James Baker

simonizer77 2014-05-06 23:17:55 -0500 Report

Anybody who would give you crap is an insensitive turd (oops, sorry for the pun). Diabetes is a pain in the ass and harder for some than others. I've been blessed by having fairly normal sugars and no issues with Metformin. I hate exercise and I live in sunny New Mexico. I've lost my motivation for now and recently gained 15 lbs while eating healthy! Each day or WEEK at a time. Whatever works for you is all you can do! Don't be too hard on yourself. Life's just too damn short!!

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