Feeling Numb

By poopsie78 Latest Reply 2014-04-26 11:03:26 -0500
Started 2014-04-24 12:49:43 -0500

Tried expressing my feeling and need for love and support from my boyfriend of four yrs… It went drastically wrong. I'm not a fighter… I'm a crier… He told me that he must be a jerk and left the house… I feel like I don't know how to talk to him as he's and aggressive talker… And the first thing I did when he left was ate iunk food and cried more… I'm suppose to eat well so I can live… But when things like this happen all I can do is eat… I don't know how to care about me

7 replies

Type1Lou 2014-04-26 11:03:26 -0500 Report

Poopsie, you've got to learn to love yourself. It wasn't until I was in my 30's that I began to be comfortable with who I am. Start by choosing to make the right decisions about how to take care of your diabetes. When you get good results, it validates your efforts and makes you feel better about yourself. I'm not trying to minimize what happened between you and your boyfriend because it must be devastating and stressful. What steps can you take to make things better for YOU? Remember, you can only control what YOU do. I love the quote "The greatest power is the power of choice." We each make our own choices.

Kaydoo 2014-04-24 21:10:16 -0500 Report

My significant other eats chocolate, cake, cookies and coca cola in front of me all the time, while chastising me for watering down juice as a treat.
Just ignore him, men can be boars.

Type1Lou 2014-04-26 10:54:41 -0500 Report

Kaydoo, my husband loves his desserts and why should my dietary restrictions prevent him from eating and enjoying what he likes? I've stopped baking much because it's too much of a temptation for me but he now makes himself cakes and cookies and I'm not tempted to eat the stuff he puts together…go figure! What my hubby resents is that I can eat all the fats I want (e.g. cheeses) while not having to worry about my cholesterol or triglycerides because they always come back in good range. I've found through the years that's it's wise to pick the battles that matter most and let the other stuff slide.

jayabee52 2014-04-24 22:08:03 -0500 Report

I agree Kay, we CAN be real boors from time to time (and some of us all the time). but what ya gonna do? Can't live with them. and it is illegal to shoot them! LoL!

Type1Lou 2014-04-26 10:50:35 -0500 Report

While Kaydoo's significant other may be a "boor", he could also be a boar (pig) or a bore (yawn)…don't you just love the English language!

dagger1234 2014-04-24 18:04:05 -0500 Report

*hugs* my bf is the same way, there are times where he's sweet and considerate and asks me what we should eat and then there's times when he doesn't seem to care about me but himself. Let him know how you feel and see if he changed. Now a days I'll just buy food and eat that or eat in moderation if the food isn't heathy. U do what u gotta do to survive.

jayabee52 2014-04-24 13:23:35 -0500 Report

OH Poopsie, I am so sorry you went through that.

You don't need to be a fighter, just learn how to assertively communicate with folks. It is a learned skill. This article from Psych central gives you a taste of this ~ http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2010/02...

Or you could use another strategy for communication in giving him "I messages". You can find suggestions for sending I messages here ~ http://www.beyondintractability.org/essay/I-m...

To do either of these you may well want to see a therapist and work on either, or both forms of communication.

Sometimes it depends on how one approaches a person as to the response one gets. It would be interesting to me to get a "verbatim" of what the discussion was from the time you brought up the subject with him until he called you a jerk and left the house.

I am wondering if you had the diabetes when your BF met you, or whether you developed the diabetes somewhere along the way? Sometimes if the latter, it takes a significant other some time to wrap one's head around the fact that you have it, and that this changes your relationship somehow.

God's best to you
James Baker

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