what did you expect from the site?

By highlandcitygirl Latest Reply 2009-02-09 20:01:26 -0600
Started 2009-01-28 11:24:18 -0600

i am curious, i have only been here since november. i found it by accident. what got me hooked right from the start was all the invites to be friends, i like having them. where is the post that tells me the site rules? have i been breaking them ? someone in charge please tell me what the rules are? i learn from other people and their experience. loneliness has been my play companion all my life. i am learning about diabetes as iam learning about friendship! is this not allowed?

30 replies

sexyswamprat 2009-01-31 19:20:55 -0600 Report

Other than the spot where John just posted some rules I'm curious as to where on the site the rules are readily available to everyone. I have yet to find a section stating all the rules. If there is one can someone please tell me where it is.

LadyDi - 26259Miller
LadyDi - 26259Miller 2009-01-31 19:45:17 -0600 Report

At the bottom of this page, see "Terms of Use".

Debe Pendice
Debe Pendice 2009-01-31 19:51:35 -0600 Report

Yes and privacy policy too

LadyDi - 26259Miller
LadyDi - 26259Miller 2009-01-31 20:40:22 -0600 Report

Every site has "Terms of Use" or something to that effect, usually found at the bottom of their home page. When you join you are, in effect, agreeing to these terms. You'll probably see sometimes that you actually must mark a box agreeing to the terms in order to be able to join a site. Sometimes they're just normal routine terms that are commonly seen, but occasionally there is more to them, so it pays to at least scan them before joining. They're always so dadburned long and involved that I doubt many people do read them - at least not in their entirety.

highlandcitygirl 2009-01-31 20:44:01 -0600 Report

you got that right, after just a little of that kind of talk , i get a headache! i am not joking! it really does make my head hurt. so sometimes i just stop reading.

sexyswamprat 2009-01-31 20:52:28 -0600 Report

I started to read the one for this site and stopped. I figure if I do something wrong SOMEONE will tell me about it.

momwith juvie
momwith juvie 2009-01-31 14:30:26 -0600 Report

I also found this site by accident .you are not alone.i am a mother who stays home and takes care of my kids.i love it.i also relize i have no personal life.i have a hard time making freinds so im glad i read you.hope to talk to you again

sparkysmom 2009-01-28 19:37:12 -0600 Report

I wanted to meet people who are going through what I am. I wanted to learn about my diabetes. I love the fellowship we enjoy here and most of us have broken a rule to two since being here. They don't jump on you when you do. A gentle reminder but no one gets too upset. Thank You John and Amy and all for starting this site.

Robert C. H.
Robert C. H. 2009-01-29 12:33:11 -0600 Report

I thank John & Amy too, But would like to Question The diabetes only topic. as I have written & responded to discussions I have found so many of our members share so many other ailments, some related to diabetes some not, but on the whole they affectour ability to treat our diabetes. Does that mean we are out of line with our discussions?I have Heart problems, an Ilestomy,And diabetes type 2 and they all conflict with each other on diet, Meds I can take, now I have been diagnosed with Panic attacks, and they have really given me trouble with controlling my diabetes,So I consider them all part of my health plan,and can't seperate them from my diabetes program

John Crowley
John Crowley 2009-01-29 12:41:08 -0600 Report

Of course, other health conditions—especially those that impact your diabetes treatments or symptoms—are an excellent topic to discuss here.

To clarify, we really don't want to censor any content (other than offensive, illegal, or commercial content). But at times, we may feel like there is too much content being added around non-diabetes topics. We may from time to time ask a member to try to focus more on diabetes topics to help us stay focused on the primary purpose of this website.

Robert C. H.
Robert C. H. 2009-02-02 13:48:06 -0600 Report

Thank you John, I was just trying To figure out if I was using the site wrong. I read a lot of the discussions and if I can't relate I just pass on them,but latly I have seen a lot of just fun type of discussions, which seem to bring out the not much fun responses

rbergman 2009-01-29 12:41:25 -0600 Report

I am a true newbie having only joined a few days ago, but I have come to rely on this site more than others for the information i seek and cannot find on my own. When i stumbled onto this site (as I have other sites) I felt it was different and unique because of the wide range of subjects discussed here but that it mainly focused on diabetes, but I also feel if something non-diabetic related is bothering me I could find comfort here as well, afterall stress over any subject still affects our diabetes too. I say BRAVO to the site and all the wonderful members I am already in contact with and the many more I look forward to being in contact with!

Debe Pendice
Debe Pendice 2009-01-29 12:42:54 -0600 Report

I personally think what they are trying to convey is this is a diabetic site. yes you are right in discussion your problems and medications and such with your diabetic troubles. But alot of these discussions are getting out of hand with just "fun" topics that have nothing to do with diabetes. I agree it is fun to destress with such cheerful topic once in a while. But I feel they think these "fun" topics are taking over the real reason for this site. Diabetes…Just my personal take of this…Debe

LadyDi - 26259Miller
LadyDi - 26259Miller 2009-01-29 15:54:32 -0600 Report

My view as well. Not long after joining I left because of some of the discussions and posts that I felt were inappropriate for a medical site. I have no problems with discussing other health issues, or an occasional chuckle or two. In my opinion, however, some of the topics have been just silly.

In any event, I decided to return to the site because I had made friends in the short time I had been here, and because I found the medical information and discussions useful and enlightening. I also like the personal side - encouraging and supporting others.

When I decided to come back, I decided that I would avoid those topics that didn't appeal to me and join in a few of the more frivilous ones briefly from time to time. That has worked for me. But I do believe that some things could be best handled in other ways (messaging). For social comments and such I think other sites are better suited (i.e. FaceBook, MySpace, using IM, etc.).

I think the rules John shared are all good ones. They've been very liberal with the enforcement of the "rules", and I don't think their intent is to drive anyone away, but to keep the site informative and worthwhile. After all, when we joined we joined because it was a site where we could obtain good information on diabetes. I don't think any of us joined simply for the social aspects.

If we're just thoughtful and reasonable with what we post, we can continue to be a site that people seek out for valuable information, support and encouragement. Let's not get all in a huff and say we're leaving, etc. We've all "broken the rules" I imagine - or many of us have. Let's just keep in mind the real purpose and intent for which the site was set up. Thanks, John, for clearing things up.

Anonymous 2009-01-31 09:26:44 -0600 Report

How many times are we going to be scolded like children on this site.
There are many issues and problems we deal with in our diabetic life, I do not see how a little humor and chit chat is wrong. I enjoy reading what people are able to do and how they are dealing with this disease and others. But I do not need to come to this site or any site and be scolded like I was the only one that has done something wrong.
We have all "broken the rules", so like Lady Di did it is my time to take a break, since my non diabetic comments are wrong and break the rules.

LadyDi - 26259Miller
LadyDi - 26259Miller 2009-01-31 14:11:30 -0600 Report

Again, I don't think all "non diabetic" comments are out of place, and I don't think that was what John was saying either, altho I don't want to speak for him. I enjoy the friendly chit chat and comments - the digs at each other within a discussion, etc. I have enjoyed and taken part in several "off topic" conversations. Like John said a while back, the "off topic" discussions just need to be an occasional thing. If you enjoy the friends you've made on here and feel the information, support and encouragement you receive is good, then the site has achieved its purpose, in my opinion. If you need to take a break occasionally, that's good too. The "off topics" don't bother me anywhere near as much as the bickering and negativity that appears at times.

GabbyPA 2009-01-28 17:23:53 -0600 Report

What I expect from the site is like sitting around the table with a bunch of my friends.
We have a common illness that we want to deal with, but to be so singularly dimensional is unrealistic on any relationship. We chat, we goof off, we get serious. We share our fears and our triumphs and sometimes we just have to complain. But the commonality of diabetes is our thread that binds us.

So I expect that here I can find people to understand where I am coming from. People who can encourage me to not give up and kick my butt when I need that too. What I expect is for all of us at the table to respect eachother and do our best to be in their shoes. I don't understand many of the things my friends go thru, but I am still here to listen and help if they want it. I expect that they will do the same for me.

The thing that I expect most is that we come as friends and leave as friends. That we will disagree and even clique, but when I come back to the table next time, I still want to see friends there, waiting for me.

Sheryl 2009-01-28 18:41:17 -0600 Report

Why don't you add a 'mixed bag' topic…there people can post outside the 'informational' part of the site.
Kind of a place to get off topic without causing problems to the 'diabetic' topics.

I didn't mean to attach this to Gabbys reply and it won't let me delete it…sorry Gabby…didn't mean to step over your conversation…lol

highlandcitygirl 2009-01-28 15:56:03 -0600 Report

i guess i should have asked what does the site expect of the site members. okay i have read the rules and i think i understand most of them. i am somewhat dense in some areas and need help understanding. is it alright to have a friendly comraderie with our fellow site members, is it alright to talk about things bothering us, is it okay to ask for prayer, is it okay to lift each other up?
what i am saying is, being ill or trying to stay healthy is a hard job. sometimes i just need to hear what others are going through , so that i will be comforted in knowing that someone understands me and cares because their going through it too! i am not trying to be a wise acre, i just want to do right for the site as well as myself.

John Crowley
John Crowley 2009-01-28 16:53:08 -0600 Report

Of course, it is OK to be friendly with each other.

I did not list the rules to try to come down on anyone. I like the friendly nature of the site. We do, however, want to stay balanced. If the site becomes only about friendship and chatting about jokes or non-diabetes-related topics, then we just become like MySpace or something like that.

So we do want to emphasize that the main reason for this site to exist is to share advice and information to help each other deal with diabetes. But of course, being friendly and chatting with each other is fine as long as it's balanced.

We're working on some new features that will hopefully help balance this whole issue.

highlandcitygirl 2009-01-28 17:04:59 -0600 Report

thank you john, your a real prince! sometimes this old girl needs a little reassurance. i really like to be on this site and didn't want to do anything wrong! i don't remember the rules when i first joined, it was my first time on the computer, i'll use that as my excuse, okay?

John Crowley
John Crowley 2009-01-28 15:37:11 -0600 Report

I'm so glad that you found us here and have enjoyed the site.

As for rules, we do have them. They are listed in the Terms of Use. http://www.diabeticconnect.com/terms-of-use

The most important rules about what to post are listed in this paragraph:

You shall not upload, email, post or transmit to, or distribute or otherwise publish through the DiabeticConnect.com Web site any material which:

(i) disrupts the normal flow of dialogue and/or exchange on the Site, including posting or otherwise transmitting material that is not related to the subject at issue or otherwise restricts or inhibits any other user from using and enjoying the DiabeticConnect.com Web site;

(ii) is unlawful, threatening, abusive, libelous, defamatory, obscene, vulgar, offensive, harassing, hateful, embarrassing, pornographic, profane, sexually explicit, or indecent;

(iii) constitutes or encourages conduct that would constitute a criminal offense, potentially give rise to civil liability (including claims of defamation and/or libel), or otherwise violate the local, state, or national laws of any country;

(iv) violates, plagiarizes, or infringes the rights of third parties including, without limitation, copyright, trademark, patent, rights of privacy or publicity, trade secrets, or any other proprietary right;

(v) contains a virus, worm, Trojan horse, or other harmful component;

(vi) contains any information, software, or other material of a commercial nature;

(vii) contains solicitations or advertisements of any kind;

(viii) constitutes or contains false or misleading indication of origin or statement of fact; or

(ix) contains chain letters or pyramid schemes.

Anonymous 2009-01-28 16:06:01 -0600 Report

Well I stand corrected. I quess most of us have broken alot of these rules. And I am one of them. Oh well. I will stop posting all together. See you guys.

John Crowley
John Crowley 2009-01-28 16:58:13 -0600 Report

I'm sorry you took it that way. I posted the rules to show that we have made the rules available from the start.

Obviously, this is a new venture for all of us. We're learning as we go. We do want the site to be primarily about diabetes. But please don't feel like we're saying that if you've ever posted something that is not related to diabetes that you should be kicked off the site.

We're just trying to keep things balanced. That's all.

caragypsy 2009-01-28 15:01:31 -0600 Report

I fould the site by accident in November too. I have fould a lot of good info but I love to invite people to be friends too.
I too am a lonely person.

Anonymous 2009-01-28 11:37:36 -0600 Report

Personally, I think you have done nothing wrong. I like this site because I can get info on my diabetes and ask questions about it. But I also can get to know people like me that are dealing with my same issues that are not diabetic related. I like the discussions that are about quotes, jokes and yesterday I had a problem with my computer and get alot of advice. While it may not be about diabetes, my computer is a big part of my life and I need it. So somehow it is realted to diabetes because it is my lifeline to keep my sanity. So for me, the non diabetic discussions do not bother me. I like them. What I do not like is having to weed through all the old discussions that are being brought back up, and going through it and it is just a one word post. But that is me. So highland you have done nothing wrong. I like your posts and do not feel bad about them.

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