Mom who needs some help!!

momwith juvie
By momwith juvie Latest Reply 2009-05-09 18:49:54 -0500
Started 2009-01-23 20:56:03 -0600

I am new here so i am so happy to find this site.
I am a mom with a 9 yr old son who has type 1 diabetes.He was diagnosed in 2002.I understand that it is always going to be a struggle to keep his sugars undercontrol and work with the carbs.I have more trouble with another problem.I want my son to understand he is a kid who should enjoy life and live it.he just dosnt want to.He lets his diabetes stop him.He dosnt want to go out and join groups or be apart of anything,afraid hes going to get and take long to heal or afraid his sugar might go to hig or to low.I'm at a lost on what to do.If you have any suggestion i would like to hear them.Thank you!!!

24 replies

cyncyn 2009-04-30 21:38:09 -0500 Report

As i keep saying,"this is a great bunch of people". when in need, everyone joins right in. the replies here, are so great and incouraging. what everyone has said, they are all incouraging. my youngest son felt like an outcast, when he was little, he suffered chronic asthma. he felt he couldn't join in with his friends. but with lots of education and support from us, he reached his full potential. he became the star player of his basketball team.
so get all the info you need, and give all the support you can, and your son too will reach his full potential!
good luck to you and him,

Bill Barnes
Bill Barnes 2009-05-09 18:49:54 -0500 Report

I am proud that those of us who have suffered so much in the pass and present have been able to incourage others with illness to get out and fight for life and to be able to fit in society better.Those who have strong bodies and don't get sick much look down on those who do get sick as freaks or sissies or outsiders. But when we sickly folk can overcome illness and accomplish certain goals in life we become the stronger for it. Everyday that I wake up and live another day I thank God and feel blessed for being allowed to enjoy another day on this beautiful earth. Yes,I am looking forward to seeing God in heaven. But if God wishes me to remain on earth a little longer this is fine too. Like to day my sister and I brought a dog house,food,harness,feeder and bucket for a neighbors dog. They are out of work and young and not taking care of this dog very well. We have been feeding this dog for some months now and may be taking it next week to get shots. This dog has gone from not being able to look you in the face to wagging his tail and playing and having general fun. What a great feeling to help one of Gods creatures. We feel great.
I have been taking my medacine lately as usual but my sugar has been staying high(around 145 to 185). I've been exercising etc. but I have gained some weight and have been stressing out some over credit cards etc. Does anyone have any ideas on how I can lower my sugars.

ali eletre
ali eletre 2009-04-30 10:51:54 -0500 Report

hi mom
your son has to play with friends and you must set with him and try to explane that he must live with sugger and do all the things as any kid do

John Crowley
John Crowley 2009-01-26 14:43:06 -0600 Report


I really understand what you're going through. My son was diagnosed at 8 years old. He is 16 now and is a well adjusted kid. But I do see in him a little of what you're describing. I look at it kind of like a fear of taking risks. And truthfully, I think it's a pretty natural reaction.

One day the poor kid was just doing normal kid things and the next his life is completely tied to a glucose meter, injections, and watching everything he eats. And by the way, if you don't do these things, you could die.

I think that would make anyone feel a little afraid of putting yourself in any kind of danger. "Something really bad happened in the past. What if something really terrible happened if I tried this or that?"

We've tried to help our son take on new things a little bit at a time. Fortunately for him, he absolutely loves competitive soccer. So he had that drive and we just helped him manage the diabetes issues that came up along the way.

I think one of the keys for any young diabetic to understand is that if your blood sugar is in good control, there is no limit to what you can do. Maybe you could help your son understand that it's true that if his blood sugar is running super high all the time, a serious injury *would* take a long time to heal. But if he's taking care of his diabetes the way you've taught him, he won't heal any slower than any other kid.

And as for highs and lows during an event, that solution is all about preparation. Just assure him that he doesn't need to worry, you'll always have what he needs to take care of a high or a low.

I hope that helps a little. It is a tough thing to know the right things to say at the right time. I wish you all the best.

John Crowley

2catty 2009-01-26 15:07:58 -0600 Report

You know, I remember back in the 5th grade their was a child that was new. They introduced him and told us that he was a diabetic and had to carry a source of sweets in case his sugar got low. The kid looked so scared, and us other kids was scared because we didn't want to hurt him. I remember that he had cookies, we told him I wish I had diabetes that way we could eat cookies in class too. Little did I know I would have diabetes later. I shouldn't have made that wish huh? Bottom line not only do the diabetics need to be educated but everyone does. I know that child had to feel like a outcast. And the kids didn't know how to handle it either. We were all scared. I hope that little boy growed up to be a healthy happy young man.

Bill Barnes
Bill Barnes 2009-01-28 09:33:59 -0600 Report

Hi everybody. I had encephalitis and polio and gout when I was younger. And yes I had to take things very easy. I had to set on the side lines when kids were playing baseball etc. because I could not take a chance on breaking a frail leg or arm. Snd of course no one wanted to have a crippled kid on their team. When I was 45 years old I was told I had diabeties. I thought I was going to die. Then after a while I was busy with life,working long hours at work etc,and didn't pay a lot of attention to my dicease. I then saw a story on the internet which described the problems one can get if he does not take care of this dicease. I was totally scared. You can loose your feet,have heart attacks etc. I then found a good indocraine doctor who just happened to have diabeties as well. Bad for him but good for me. And he knew my doctor whom I am seeing now. They are very good doctors. I now take very good care of my sugars,eat well and get plenty of exercise. Exercise-exercise-exerciseis the kee to beating diabeties.
I am 59 years old. And even with all my disabilities I still go out and walk everyday. In the last five months I have cut and split by hand 6 cords of oak wood. Yes I have to stop often and rest and set because of severe pain in my hips from polio,but I enjoy cutting wood. I have been cutting wood since I was thirteen years old. The very next day that I was out of the hospital I stood in snow up to my waste and helped my father cut wood. My a1c for the pass twelve months has been a 6. This is perfect. So my point is get your kids out and let them exercise. Swimming is an excellent exercise. If you get your doctor to write a prescription the insurance will pay for most of the cost.
Also for anyone who has pain in their feet(called nurapathy),there is a treatment for this problem which willy works. I had this problem several years ago and happened to see an advertiseman which showed an operation for this. The surgeon will go in different parts of your feet and legs and arms and hands,depending where the problem exists.
He then cleans the fatty tissue which has gathered around the nerves. This allows the flow of blood back to these nerves ending the pain. I had the pain in my feet so bad I could not hardly walk. But now I am just fine. The pain was gone in twenty four hours or less. No pain from the operations either. The doctor in Charlottesville,Virginia was a perfectionist and learned to do this at John Hopkins. His name is Dr. Desabatos.A very good caring doctor.

2catty 2009-01-28 09:54:10 -0600 Report

I have never heard of that procedure, very interesting. Especially since I am newly diagnosed with neuropathy. Reading your post is very incouraging. But it is official, I am Lazy with a capital L. I exercise but jeez I complain when I do. I gotta get it in gear. I am inspired I am gonna get even more exercise. Thank you for sharing your heartwarming story. It is very helpful.

Bill Barnes
Bill Barnes 2009-04-07 07:29:45 -0500 Report

I am glad I was able to help you and inspire you. Your son is very important to you and he a life time ahead of him. He can not set and let life leap a head of him. He can't afford to not exercise. Swimmimg is a very great exercise. Have your son join a local in door pool. Allow him to go at least three or four times a week for at least an hour each time. Then check his blood to see if it is low or normal. At first it may get a little low. But you will soon know what to feed him before goes swimming so his blood won't get too low. This is what I did when I went swimming. The sugars will eventually level off normally as his body gets use to the exercise. You should go swimming and exercise as well.

2009-01-26 07:14:16 -0600 Report

I can only imagine how you must feel. Everyone posted some great information for you above. It's hard enough being an adult with Type 1, dealing with the shots., etc. I'm sure your son doesn't understand why he takes shots every single day and his friends don't. I pray he will get out and be a kid. I will keep you and your son in my prayers! Take care, Angie

Melissa Dawn
Melissa Dawn 2009-01-24 22:07:15 -0600 Report

Does your son have any interaction with other diabetics? When I was young, my parents sent me to a weekend long camp for diabetics. It wasn't their usual way, and it sounded odd.. I remember very little, but I do remember feeling less… alone. Diabetes is a disease that makes you different. You have to think more about what you eat, what your actions will do to your blood sugar… really, about everything that comes so naturally for other diabetics. Its hard sometimes not to let that worry take over. Knowing there where other diabetics around… particularly healthy ones, helped.

To your son I add this message:
As an person whose lived with diabetes for most of their life, don't worry quite so much. Worry adds to the highs. You've gotta live life. There is plenty of fun to be had. Go out and enjoy it. If you do that, the diabetes doesn't win. Promise.

- Melissa

2catty 2009-01-24 22:11:28 -0600 Report

Yes I have heard of some wonderful camps for children. They really need to expand to more areas. I live in the mountains which is a tourist area that has a lot of camps just not one for diabetics. I wish one could be started. Maybe if I get the class going I could mention this and see what happens.

Melissa Dawn
Melissa Dawn 2009-01-25 16:41:01 -0600 Report

Check with the ADA — I think they are the ones that sponsored the camps for my area. Perhaps you can put it in their heads to do one out by you.

momwith juvie
momwith juvie 2009-01-26 14:17:15 -0600 Report

THANK YOU.Yes my son goes to camp every summer,i actully send him to is for him the other is for all of us.there are no other type 1 in his school ,i think that is why he feels alone.he main worry is if he gets hurt it will take him a long time to heal.i have told him that it is ok.

LadyDi - 26259Miller
LadyDi - 26259Miller 2009-01-24 19:18:28 -0600 Report

This is a forum for parents of children with diabetes. There is one there for teens and children as well. Hope you find something there that will be helpful.


2catty 2009-01-24 21:00:42 -0600 Report

I think it would be great if there was some support groups available to parents of children and teens and for adults for that much. I am sure their is but not enough. Especially in Rural areas. It is a shame. I am trying to organize one for the county I live in through the health dept. Wish me luck.

Richard157 2009-01-24 21:34:55 -0600 Report

Here is, perhaps, the best site for parents of diabetic children. There is a support group and chat room there.

This on is for teens:

2catty 2009-01-24 22:08:31 -0600 Report

This is great Richard. This will help those who cannot out. I trying however to start a class the will give others a chance to meet others and become friends and diabetic buddies. Children can see they are not alone and form friendships. Also to share some resource ideas and a diabetic recipe and cooking class. With the help of a certified nutritionist. I think this will be great for my community.

LadyDi - 26259Miller
LadyDi - 26259Miller 2009-01-23 22:43:43 -0600 Report

I hope that his doctor has talked with him and assured him that he can still lead his life playing and enjoying the same things other kids enjoy. A good doctor would do that from the start.

If you could get him into a group of other children who are dealing with diabetes, I'll bet that would encourage him too. You don't say he's actually experienced anything with the other kids that would cause him to feel that way, or that he's had any "spells", etc., while out playing. If he has, then I'm sure this is the biggest reason for his fears. If he could talk with other diabetics who have successfully gone on with their lives - especially young people (perhaps a teen that he could look up to), that might help.

As he matures he probably will more readily accept his diabetes and better understand his limitations and his possibilities. I have not looked, but I feel sure there must be books on childhood diabetes at the library.

Other than those things, just loving him and encouraging him and helping to feel safe - doing what you can to make him feel "normal" - is the best you can do. I wish you success and pray he can overcome this. You didn't say how he was before the diagnosis (outgoing? shy?), but it could be that some of this is just his personality.

Richard157 2009-01-23 21:29:31 -0600 Report

Hello there, welcome to our community! Your son's fears sound very familiar. I was diagnosed when I was 6 in 1945. I was entirely dependent on my mother back when there was almost nothing known about diabetes. They took me to 4 doctors before one recognized my symptoms. I did not play with kids in school. I sat and watched. Your son might be like that. You have so much available to you now and you can put him on the right path to good control. If I were you I would not push him into doing things that he does not want to do. Let nature take its course. If he studies and makes good grades and he has good control of his diabetes that will be great. The other things can come later when he is ready. This is the way I would have handled one of my sons if either of them had been diabetic like me.

I have been diabetic for 63 years now and I am very healthy. You son might appreciate hearing that. He can have a long, healthy and happy life with your help and good control. Good luck to both of you!


2009-01-23 23:31:52 -0600 Report

Richard, when I read the opening message in this discussion I thought of you and thought 'Richard will address this' and lo and behold the next one was you… :) I've read your stories and that's why I thought of you. Maybe her son should read your stories and what you've accomplished in your life… :) Inspiration to me!


2catty 2009-01-24 16:19:31 -0600 Report

Well first I agree with Richard. He can teach us all. Secondly if I was you I would try to seek out a way to introduce him to other children and adults that is going through and has went through the same thing. He probably feels isolated and very confused and sad about his condition. When I was diagnoses I went on a emotional rollercoaster. I cried, I kicked I was mad at me, I was mad at the world. I denied then I accepted. I think we all go through this. It is why I come here. To relate. Good luck with your son. If you need us we are here.

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