Denial

bar59567
By bar59567 Latest Reply 2014-01-04 11:54:02 -0600
Started 2014-01-01 13:12:19 -0600

Why can't I get it through my head I have diabetes. I have a college degree and ran a school of 110 children. I had complete control over it but I can't do that with my diabetes. I just can't accept I have it and it will be 8 years January 7th. I also have had depression for 22 years maybe that has something to do with it, I don't know. But I'm tired of fighting myself everyday with it. I just wish it would go away.


12 replies

orourkebp
orourkebp 2014-01-04 06:49:58 -0600 Report

Denial, I hear exactly what you are saying. I've got 2 Master's degrees, yet I still have a difficult time accepting this. In my head I understand that I have been diagnosed with a disease. Took me over a year to tell my family. But aside from the occasional "are you taking your meds?", no one else seems to care much less support me. I accept that this is my issue and I will have to figure out how to deal with it.

I know that I have diabetes, but I certainly haven't accepted it yet. What I have done for my new year's resolution is to just take each day as it comes, not beat myself up when I fall and try to figure out how not to fall the next time.

bar59567
bar59567 2014-01-04 11:54:02 -0600 Report

Thank you! You know just how I feel. I'm going to use your new year resolution. Sometimes when I mess up I try to talk to my husband about it but all he does is get mad at me. He tells me since I'm not working my only job is to take care of myself. And he doesn't understand if he could quit drinking 30 years ago and hasn't had a drink since he doesn't know why I can't stick to my diet. All of this makes me want to eat more. You have to eat and go to the grocery store but you don't have to pick the right beer and go the the beer store. I just can't understand we're he's coming from. Wow all of that just came out I feel relieved! Lots of hugs!!! Barbara

ryxter
ryxter 2014-01-03 22:00:56 -0600 Report

I was only diagnosed two weeks ago and just being on this site has helped me accept an feel more in control. I'm just starting out and taking in the experiences and kind words people have offered here to heart and it helps me to feel better that I am not alone and though that I may never meet anyone form here, that there are people who are rooting for you.

I wish you the best and hope you find a path to controlling it, I believe you can ^_^

Jennieetch
Jennieetch 2014-01-03 10:14:21 -0600 Report

I'm in the same boat as far as the mind set if you ever need to talk. I get it. You're not trying to feel sorry for yourself but r trying to figure out how to deal with it emotionally. Well that's how I feel anyway. I'm new on here so I don't know if u can send a msg to just me but I'm here if u ever need a boost.

ladykia36
ladykia36 2014-01-02 18:01:04 -0600 Report

that post was meant for you denial.. don't get yourself down.. life is to short. enjoy it.. work on walking when you can or daily.. ride a bike.. live life. :-)

denipink57
denipink57 2014-01-02 08:09:20 -0600 Report

i think that if you could accept it you would feel a lot better. diabetes is not a life sentence. it can be controlled with diet and exercise. work hard to deal with your D and before you know it you won't even feel it anymore. if you do have to feel it day by day just focus on a good diet, exercise and taking your meds. that's really not that hard to do. all the best and hope your depression gets better. i get depressed too.

Gabby
GabbyPA 2014-01-01 14:48:05 -0600 Report

This is the perfect time of the year to make a commitment to getting past your denial. The fact that you are here tells me that you may not really be in denial as much as you have just fallen prey to apathy. They can be very close cousins. Depression doesn't help, but try not to use it as an excuse to just not care.

Set some little goals. Ones that you feel you can attain. Then let the feeling of accomplishment fuel your future goals. It won't always be smooth sailing, but we are here to help you along if you want.

dagger1234
dagger1234 2014-01-01 14:26:45 -0600 Report

Just because you are in control over something does not mean you will have control in every aspect of life. Try seeing your doctor again and ask questions, support groups online such as this site and other areas, and ask to set up a diabetic education. Write down questions ahead of time and ask away.

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2014-01-01 13:47:07 -0600 Report

Do you hae a Living Will, Life Insurance, made funeral arraingements, writte a will for your family and purchased a burial plot? These are the things you should be doing while you are in denial. Diabetes will kill you. It can cause you to lose your vision, limbs, cause kidney failure and a number of other things. If you have been in denial for 8 years you are allowing diabetes to slowly kill you.

I was taking a course to be certified as an Emergency Medical Techinician, in my Crisis Intervention class, a student told the instructor who had a Doctorate that once she got her degree she would be smarter than she was. He said the one thing a degree does not give you is common sense. She was stunned and didn't understand what he said.

If you don't accept that you are diabetic you are doing a great disservice to yourself and your body. Diabetes isn't going anywhere and denial will make it worse. You didn't say if you are Type1 or 2.

This is the first day of a new year. Go to your doctor and an Endocrinologist, ask for a referral to a nutritionist and attend a Diabetes Education class. Having a college degree doesn't matter, I have one also and have accomplished a lot. Diabetes does not care if you have a college degree, children, a spouse, friends, that you enjoy everything you do. You have got to accept this and if you need help getting over this, talk with a therapist. Diabetes can be controlled and once you accept the fact that you are a diabetic, fighting with yourself will end.

I enjoy my life, I have diabetes, it does not have me. I controll diabetes it does not control me. I do everything I want to do in life. Very good luck to you.

ladykia36
ladykia36 2014-01-02 18:00:07 -0600 Report

exactly… i have diabetes for 3 years now.. and was gestational before that while carrying my little girl. I do what I should and continue to walk etc. My only thing right now is hairloss .. but i'm going to see someone tomorrow. I'm not going to let this get to me. Why life is beautiful.. enjoy every day .. :-) don't let diabetes get ya down.

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