Why is it that we can be closer to ur DC friends than family?

By tinkerbell54 Latest Reply 2015-01-17 18:50:30 -0600
Started 2013-12-20 07:45:14 -0600

it is funny since I have been apart of the DC I feel closer to my DC friends than my own family. This Christmas My brother will visit me & give a gift to my 17 yr old daughter Rain. & He "NEVER" gives me a Christmas gift. But I give him a gift every year. Last Christmas I made handmade blanket for him & his "NEW" wife Sara.This Christmas I made him a Handmade scraf. & I made for Sara a handmade purse. It is shame I cant pick my family like I can pick my friends on DC. Ruth Tinkerbell54 PS: Why is it that family seems to be closer when the is death in the family or they "NEED" someone to pray for them.

Tags: family

3 replies

RebDee 2015-01-17 18:50:30 -0600 Report

Its easier to talk to someone when you are practically anonymous. We make up our names, don't really tell anything about ourselves. So it is easy to talk and make friends with DC strangers. It is guilt and love that brings families together at a time of death of a loved one.
After my husband died, my son stopped coming to visit me. I have seen him at funerals of family members and happy occasions hosted by other family members, but he never visits me. So last year, I decided that he is no longer a member of my family and therefore I don't have to stress over why he is not visiting me. I am civil to him when I see him but I don't care to associate with someone who is an ungrateful brat. He has been my son since he was 11 years old and he is now 44.

Stuart1966 2014-02-13 20:48:22 -0600 Report

If you live in the SAME @)*#(@__&@# "diabetic mud" (up to my eyebrows) every single day which I do, there is a host of stuff Ill never need to explain to you… solely because you live there too…

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2013-12-23 12:15:31 -0600 Report

Families can be complex groups. They are made up of individuals who have their own issues. If your family was not close knit when you were growing up, you can't expect them to be close knit as adults.

If your brother has never given you a gift, why continue to give them or expect them from him? Of all the gifts you have given him that are handmade, have you ever seen him use them? If not, he may not appreciate or liked the gift you gave him. Not everyone likes handmade gifts. This year, keep the scar and donate it to a person who is homeless and give your brother a card. Some people will give a gift to a child before they give one to an adult. Ask your brother why he never gives you a gift. If he says you are an adult and shouldn't expect one or if he says he would rather give one to his niece, or that he can't afford gifts for everyone and chose your child, don't be upset with him because of his answer. For all you know he could be upset with you over something that happened years ago and he might not like you. Talking to him could solve some problems you may or may not know you have.

You also have to look at yourself and how they treat you. If you are a constant complainer, a whiner, always need someone to listen to your complaints, have no sense of humor, are overly religious, always talk about your religion, your medical problems and all the other problems in your life, you may be turning people off. If you are always critical of them, opinionated and turn every conversation back to yourself, that also turns them off. Sometimes changing your self may be the way to get people to love or like you.

I avoid all relatives who whine and complain, have no sense of humor or are overly religous because they get on my nerves. They tend to suck the fun out of our family gatherings. I have a very large extended family. We come together for funerals, weddings if invited, family dinners, game nights or just sitting around talking and having fun.

Even with friends, you have to choose them wisely because not everyone is your friend. People regardless if they are friends or family will like or love you for their own reasons. You can't expect people to love or like you because you are related to them. You have to have something in common with your friends and family. At the end of the day, no matter what you do, people still may not love or like you and that is something you have to live with because the only person you can change is you.