Non family support

george allshouse
By george allshouse Latest Reply 2013-11-07 13:45:44 -0600
Started 2013-09-29 00:24:35 -0500

Has anyone with a family members who are not supportive of you and make fun of you to the point of felling not want to live and not to take the shots? Well my family are always doing that I just wish they would stop and help me but I all alone


22 replies

Young1s
Young1s 2013-10-05 00:16:37 -0500 Report

This is a sad truth that I really don't get. So, because my condition isn't immediantly life threatening, it doesn't warrant the concern. Makes me mad. My hubby used to be the same way. He used to make jokes like " Oh man, I'm so full, I feel like I'm getting the betes." Really!?! I had to have a serious talk with him about that. Not to mention that it is now a regular thing where I check his levels at least once a month. He loaths the finger pricks and understands now that having to do that 3-4 times a day is no laughing matter. The fact is unchecked attention is the reason people die from this sucky disease all the time. How about giving us the appreciation for putting up with it. Giving us a pat on the back for maintaining when for the most part the world doesn't function on our particular diets. A kudos would be nice, just every once in a while. Until then, just try to continue to educate those in your life that can't quite get it. If nothing else, this annoyance teaches you patience. With yourself and others. We are certainly here for you. Hang in there.

tracyMCS
tracyMCS 2013-10-03 11:05:10 -0500 Report

george, dont let them get you down, i know how you feel…if they wont help you then as you said to me..look to those of us on this site to help you and im sure there is a support system here for you..ive found one here and ill be your friend and help you, i have two ears ill listen and to eyes ill read..

Stuart1966
Stuart1966 2013-10-03 09:58:51 -0500 Report

The issue is THEIRS not yours.

They possess ZERO power, their comments inserting themselves in our lives, "control" the disease. Far easier to insert themselves, make comments with no value. Control is a simplistic thing for those who only watch. For those in this mud upto our eyebrows, we know better intimately.

WHISTLING LOUDLY… pointing my thumb over my shoulder as if hitchhiking to the hundreds of thousands of us playing with this dragon, many who want a chance at your thread.

How are they making fun of you George? Your diabetic elders and peers insist you make fun of yourself. Laughter is a good answer to despair.

What does one diabetic say to another…

HI-LOW

Come on, George how are they making fun???

Young1s
Young1s 2013-10-05 00:46:55 -0500 Report

Yes Stuart. You are right. Sometimes making fun of a situation helps you to deal. I love to laugh so comes natural to me. Hope George can find his laughter point as well. Also love that you're not defining this monster as a disease. I think when we define it, it becomes a thing. A thing that seams unsurpassible. Not true for any of us. I just consider it my daily annoyance that I have to deal with. Like my hubby, my children (now that they are all teens and above), my in-laws…lol, can go on but won't. Too funny. I kid but still, I think you know what I mean.

joemonzo08
joemonzo08 2013-10-02 21:51:39 -0500 Report

Ignore them, move on, and realize that other people can be more supportive. As soon as I found I had type 1 diabetes a few months ago and found out how expensive my long lasting insulin was the first thing my dad said was, and he just found out I had it too, can he do without it or do a generic brand. My mom keeps thinking lose weight and it will go away and that I'm faking when my sugars are sporadic on my mood swings or the way it makes my body feel. Stay on this site, move on from them and find people who care. Shit add me and message me haha.

Young1s
Young1s 2013-10-05 00:40:26 -0500 Report

That's the thing too! How the heck do you FAKE diabetes. The hubby finally came around but my brother is still on the fence with me and my mom. In the meantime, my mom's mom and 2 of her sister have passed from diabetic complications. Not to mention her twin brother has lost toes because of them. Just saying, and I know you all understand, this is more real than it gets it's worth. More needs to be done.

Ky Lake Dave
Ky Lake Dave 2013-10-02 07:32:26 -0500 Report

A couple of decades ago, I had some family members that I just had to cut loose from my life. They were a constant negative drag on my life and barred the door to happiness. It was the healthiest thing I have done. Once I evicted them from my life, I flourished. I have slowly let them return but on my terms and I will never allow them to dictate my self worth or happiness again. Take control of your life. Do not sit in the passenger seat of your own life.You are the driver.

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2013-09-30 20:57:37 -0500 Report

George, don't let that get you down. I think it is bad that your family doesn't support you. I think there are times people are mean to others out of ignorance, fear or both. They may not know or understand diabetes and could fear they could get it. To make themselves feel better, they are taking it out on you.

Diabetes doesn't care who has it however, once you get it, only you can take care of it. Find a way to ignore them and more importantly talk to your doctor. For some people depression can be a problem and if your family is behaving the way they are, this could cause you to be depressed. Talk to your doctor about possilby speaking with a therapist for a few sessions to help you learn how to deal with the frustrations you are going through because of them. If possible have one of them go to the doctors with you and maybe the doctor can explain to them what diabetes is and how their behavior can effect you and your diabetes.

I learned to be self supporting. I don't want my family supporting me with my disease in any way. For instance my sister is off this week and we were in the grocery store. She was looking for something for our breakfast. She loves bagels and said we can have bagels for breakfast. I said I can't eat them. She didn't get any. I tried to talk her into getting them but she wouldn't. I have repeatedly told her to not buy something she can eat because I can't have any. This is why I don't want support. I don't want anyone obligated to being supportive of me because they are my family or my friends. Take care and stand strong.

Young1s
Young1s 2013-10-05 00:34:50 -0500 Report

I here ya Joyce but as you know, I am the main cook in the house. So when things go bad in my diet, it's usually because of me. But I agree with you and the others. Need be talk to the doc. And excellent idea of having someone go with to hear it first hand. Sometimes we can't articulate it the way that a professional can.

kittiebittie
kittiebittie 2013-09-30 17:05:57 -0500 Report

People make fun of things they don't understand. Are they aware of what it is, how it works? Maybe try to teach them. If not, don't let it dig in to you. (easier said then done. . .I know.)

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2013-09-29 21:59:10 -0500 Report

Hi George,

Nice to see you, my friend.

I am sorry to hear you fmaily is not supportive. It's not easy to be a diabetic, and support can make the road a whole lot easier to travel.

Here is a link to an article I wrote awhile back:

http://www.diabeticconnect.com/diabetes-information-articles/general/227-chronic-communication-tips-for-dealing-with-unsupportive-family

It sounds like you are feeling pretty down. Have you let your doctor know how you are feeling? This would be a really important discussion to have. It is not uncommon for people living with diabetes to also experience some depression. Your doctor could evaluate you for depression and make a recommendation for treatment.

It would also be a good idea to reach out to a mental health professional. But if you don't know of any resources, your doctor may be able to help you. So start there.

And stay in touch with us, my friend. You are not alone!

Gary

maelito
maelito 2013-09-29 17:43:47 -0500 Report

Hy my name is ismael and I just found out that I'm a type 2 diabetic any advise will be appreciated thank you :)

Young1s
Young1s 2013-10-05 00:28:42 -0500 Report

My advise is to become very knowlegeable about this and become good friends with your doc. And know that just because your doc is the expert, your doc is not you. If you feel a certain way about the advise he/she gives, know that you are the ultimate decider. Also come here to converse with like minded people but know that we aren't experts. Just folks that are tredging through as well. Good luck to you and hope to see you again soon.

shirl63
shirl63 2013-09-29 14:26:37 -0500 Report

am so sorry to see that george, but you are not alone. there are many people here than can give you alot of support and will not laugh at you :)

george allshouse
george allshouse 2013-09-29 01:19:18 -0500 Report

I don't think I can I wish I didn't have this it makes me feel like I'm cursed and it's all my fault for getting it

Gabby
GabbyPA 2013-09-30 09:41:58 -0500 Report

Diabetes is pretty indiscriminate. The choices we make along the way don't always add the the problem, but the choices we make after certainly can help us in the future.

Sherelle112
Sherelle112 2013-09-29 01:00:01 -0500 Report

You are not alone!! It's sad that you don't have support from your family, but you can also do this without them!!!! Don't let ANYONE make you feel like you don't want to live!! God put you here for a reason and you also have diabetes for a reason. Continue to do what's right & take your shots & most of all LIVE YOUR LIFE TO THE FULLEST!!! Everyday that we wake up is a blessing bc someone didnt wake up. Learn to see the beauty in this life! We only live once so we can't let others keep us from our dreams!!
Good luck to you!!!

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