Confused, Overwhlemed, but Mostly Lonely

By Jenellsaphid Latest Reply 2013-06-26 04:04:46 -0500
Started 2013-06-14 05:51:12 -0500

Hello. I just stumbled across this site looking for someone to talk to. My story is much of the same of many others on the Internet. I'm 22 and have had type 1 since I was four. It was fine until I hit grade 11/12, and I just got sick of everything and essentially threw caution to the wind. I never stopped injections but I did stop testing and ate a lot of what I shouldn't have.

I'm done being rebellious and I'd like to get myself back on track. However, my childhood doctor dropped my case more or less when I turned 18, and my current GP and I just don't have a relationship for lack of better words. I don't trust the guy and try to avoid him as much as possible. There's a clinic here but I don't have much contact with them either and the few times I have been in I usually left more confused than when I entered.

Since it's been so long and things change so fast with treatment options and technology, I'm feeling very overwhelmed - as if I was brand new at this. I don't know anyone else with diabetes and I don't feel like I have any support from my community or care team as an individual instead of a statistic that has to be paid for and catalogued.

I guess what I really wanted is just to write somewhere that others would understand, and maybe find someone my age who could be my friend regardless of where they are in the world. If anyone has anything at all to offer though in way of advice or encouragement, it would be very much appreciated. Thanks for reading this either way.

7 replies

Maggielynne 2013-06-16 13:32:20 -0500 Report

I'm sorry you feel all alone but glad you found a place to talk about your feelings. I'm43,yes older then you but can relate to everything from taking a break in doing my FS to not liking my Dr.
I found the strength to tell that Dr. What I thought of her insensitive ways and got a new one. I love him. He is kind , patient and is up on all the new treatments. Now that I have a dr I trust I am back to doing the right things for myself.
Maybe you can start there. Get a new Dr. Once I had one who believed in me I started to believe in myself. I still have some tough days but they are getting fewer.
This site is a wonderful safe place to get the support you need . I'm glad your here.

Type1PastryChef 2013-06-16 04:00:00 -0500 Report

I completely understand your pain! I'm 27 was diagnosed when I was 15. As I've grown I have moved many times and had no clue who to go to. The thing that has worked the best for me is research the best hospital in your area, then see who they think are the top choices from that. Use the Internet!! Take thoughts top places and doctors names and google them. You can personal reviews on the office and the doctor and decided whats the best fit for you.

giraffe320 2013-06-15 22:22:17 -0500 Report

Janell, I am not ur age actually I am 63 (female).
First - give yourself a hug for reaching out. U know people have no idea what a child goes through with this diagnosis - then trying to get through those teen years when everything takes on a whole different meaning with peer pressure and just trying to be a teenager - so give yourself another hug! As far as our age difference goes - when I was ur age an older friend told me that I reached this age I would still have that part of my teen years in my brain and she was right - I still have a great time and I am so fortunate to work around younger men and women your age. I just wanted to get that out there so that when
U saw my age u wouldn't be to quick to think what does this old lady have to say.
The other responder was correct get an endocrinologist also some hospitals have diabetic programs with lots of info -
Most importantly Janell - be good to yourself - I'm not talking about all the medical and food stuff but give yourself permission to read a good book- I know young people are not aware of this but Library's are still around. Go to a museum - alone or with a friend / try doing something different for YOU! Give your self credit for just being you and love yourself. Good Luck my Dear! Lol. Giraffe320

Set apart
Set apart 2013-06-15 16:18:32 -0500 Report

Like Lou I've only been at this for almost 2 years now as a T1. I give individuals like you a lot of credit, for living with D for so long. I think all you need is to get on DC which you are already on the right track. Start checking those BG readings first thing while fasting and before meals and 2 hours after. Keep away from from the foods which you know will make you spike, watch those carbs. Stay low glycemic with fruits,i do good with small portions of apples, berries, and sometimes pears. Stress is my biggest downfall am changing jobs now, so exercising keeps my numbers stable most of the time. I have my highs and my lows, but I try to go on, I keep ,myself busy with reading, taking care of my flowers. You know more than me,i am sure of that, one thing I've learned is that I won't let this control my life, it is part of who I am, but it does not make the WHOLE me! Take care! Living life, happy, mostly healthy, one day at a time! :-)

Type1Lou 2013-06-15 13:03:36 -0500 Report

You may wish to consider seeing an endocrinologist for help in managing your Type 1 diabetes. I developed my Type 1 at age 27 so didn't have to deal with it in childhood and adolescence like you did and am so happy that I did not develop it until later in life…those early years were tough enough! Since moving to Florida in the early 2000's, my PCP had been following my diabetes but I became increasingly uncomfortable with his handling of it and finally sought a referral to an endo in 2010 after a disastrous hypo while on vacation landed me in the hospital. I believe that endo saved my life. (My unease with my PCP's handling was validated since the endo reduced my Lantus dosage and re-educated me about mealtime insulin and a sliding scale. In 2011, I began to use an insulin pump, which I had always resisted. I love it and am kicking myself for not using one sooner. An endocrinologist specializes in treatments of diseases like diabetes and may be more in the know about how to treat it. Diabetes also has a large self-management component and you need to feel confident with your medical team since they will guide you about the decisions you need to make to gain control. Congratulations on making the decision to start taking care of yourself and welcome to DC. It's a great site with lots of info and support!

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