Hiding Sugar Product for Holiday Baking; Who is to Blame

By Anonymous Latest Reply 2008-11-29 09:43:29 -0600
Started 2008-11-26 07:28:26 -0600

I am a caretaker, and some of you know me, but for some others' I would like to remain anonymous If possible. I went out and just bought one bag of chocale chips (so far) for holiday baking. I thought I hid them well; I have really run out of all possible hiding places used in the past; even the washer, my bedroom drawers and closets; barbecue grill; because he always says if I buy sweets, I must be trying to kill him; but he must have chocalate radar, cause he finds it and eats it, then is proud he was able to stop before finishing whole bag. I guess that is a good thing, cause before he would have, but, I do not want to be an enabler to sweets; yet sometimes I need to make a cake for a birthday or something; If we have that here, I get rid of what is left. I do not do this often, anymore, and haven't even had my typical desserts for company around because of this. I do not know what to do, short of no sweets for anyone, anytime, and that does not to seem to be quite fair. I do not want to hurt him, he is hurting me,too, by eating this. I do not want him to harm himself or possibly worse, I love him and plan on keeping him around a very long time. What should or can I do?

11 replies

caspersmama 2008-11-29 09:43:29 -0600 Report

Ok here is my comment on this. My hubby is a big snacker. I buy him cookies, cakes, pies and other snack items. I am the diabetic. But I do not eat them, because I buy my own healthier snacks. It has been that way for years. He puts his in a special cabinet just for him and I put mine in my cabinet. They are not side by side. But luckily I do not like most of his snacks. But I am now in the best control I have ever been and I want to stay that way. I am loosing weight, I am feeling a whole lot better and I know the complications is I do not eat right. So for me it is not a big deal. I just want to be around for my grandkids. So utlimately it is the diabetic's decision to cheat or be in control. the caregiver can only do so much.

GabbyPA 2008-11-28 17:46:21 -0600 Report

Here is the way I see it. I know that for myself if it is in the house, I am putting myself on temptations doorstep. Now I am the one in charge of the grocery shopping, so I can only smack my own hand if I indulge where I am better off not. But it is always my choice, and I am an adult and I cannot blame anyone but myself if I choose to eat things I know I should not. There are some things that I just know I cannot "moderate", so I don't touch. You can only do so much. The rest is up to him.

I like what Taylin said. He is an adult, you have to trust him to do what he should. It is he who is "killing" himself, not you. Don't feel guilty.

I also bake for the holidays and gift giving and I don't "diet" my gift giving goodies. I do choose more carefully what I make, and if I make things I don't care for so much, temptation is dropped a LOT. (Like everyone LOVES my banana bread, but for some reason, I don't like it. I make a LOT of banana bread LOL)

I also bake savory items as well as sweet. No one needs all that sugar, so a loaf of veggie bread or herb bread is always a nice gift to share.

The other thing I do is put my baking items all in one place in plain view so that no one opens them or eats them. Those are mine for baking, not for snacking. Bake as soon as you can, and get them wrapped up and ready for giving. Then if he touches, you can be really mad for two reasons, and maybe he will stop. LOL!!

enigmalady777 2008-11-28 16:46:09 -0600 Report

I am assuming that the person you are the caretaker for is your husband, presumably an adult, not a child.

If it is an adult, then I agree that as an adult he should be responsible for his own choices.

I do not have a caretaker - I am the "caretaker" of many in my household, yet I am the diabetic in my family. I try to steer clear of things I know I should not eat, however, I will on occasion buy things for my family. I make the conscious decision not to partake in them myself or risk having a high blood sugar and all it's consequences.

Keep in mind that I do treat myself once in a while - Thanksgiving, for example, I allowed myself a small serving of stuffing and a slice of pumpkin pie - I also dosed my insulin accordingly.

The more one makes things "forbidden" the more one tends to want it.

Most diabetic adults have the necessary knowledge in order to make the right choices for themselves. Until they exercise that choice, they are held hostage by their own feelings of deprivation, and in turn are refusing to take responsibility for their own health outcome.

DonnaAnn 2008-11-28 04:24:59 -0600 Report

My question is this? why by it in the first place? Buy diabetic chocolate. Or buy fruit. I too love my chocolate, but buy it in small quanities that are diabetic. Trail mix is a good substite for me. I find the dried fruit is sweet enough to calm my cravings.
Why bring it in the house? Buy it on your way home and have a candy bar for yourself in the car. This way, you can have it and it is not a temptation in the house for him.

2008-11-28 06:24:28 -0600 Report

oh, I know you, I don't normally keep it in the house, but I shop for at least two weeks at a time, and I wanted to make a gift for my cousin of choc chip cookies for her birthday. CHeap and easy, oh well; I tried. thanks for the post; luv:->)lilmarm52

DonnaAnn 2008-11-28 16:25:51 -0600 Report

Cool ! you know me!! well hope things work out for you.

2008-11-28 16:31:31 -0600 Report

Thanks, Donna Ann, I did not even make a desert for THanksgiving; only my homemade sugar free banana bread, or pumpkin bread. I package the turkey for more healthy means. 5-3lb bags. Pretty good,and mostly white meat.:->)Claudia

Taylin 2008-11-27 10:21:08 -0600 Report

Treat him like the adult he is. It's is his choice to eat too much chocolate or sweets. Don't hide them. Let him take the responsibilty as to who is "killing" him. It's all portion control. He can have appropriate sweets in moderation.


Avera 2008-11-26 22:33:24 -0600 Report


I too have a "chocolate" radar. Just remember that there are some awesome ways to eat chocolate and other sweets the low carb way. Go to the recipe section on here and look some of them up. You said that you bake. Start fixing very low carb desserts for him. Also, go to some of the low carb sites online that sell very low carb chocolate treats and buy him a few. Most of the time, a diabetic is satisfied with something like this. LOL If you take the sugar-free tag off and hide that,,,he will never know.

Anonymous 2008-11-26 10:17:03 -0600 Report

Sounds like he needs to step up to the plate and take care of himself. You can't be someone's caretaker and guardian if they don't want to do what they need to do to manage their own illness. Sounds like he needs some 'tough love' to snap him out of his denial.

Just an opinion