Did my Dr really just say that?!?

By Mrs.Sweet Latest Reply 2012-11-10 00:47:44 -0600
Started 2012-10-03 18:41:42 -0500

I'm type two. Yes I'm a plus size women for fact I'm 338 pounds. Since being told in April of this year that I have diabetes I have lost 70 pounds! So I have made many changes and it's working. I'd also like to add that EVERYONE in my family hadst diabetes, so its also in my gene's.
Today at the Dr office. First she was running two hours behide! But I waited cause I knew we had to talk about my diabetes and lab work. I've had a really bad few days. So me being mad for three days then mad cause she had me waiting for so long my BP was up. The Dr told yelled at me cause my BP was high! Then while we was talking about my diabetes she told me " your fat, your over weight, if you didn't eat like a pig you wouldn't have caused yourself to have diabetes." Yes that really came out of her mouth! Well I wasn't to nice back to her. Then when I got home I called Medicare and told them what happened.

63 replies

Anonymous 2012-11-10 00:05:34 -0600 Report

thats why i never seen a endo doctor anymore about my diabetes im sick of the lecture they dont give to **** about you they just want there huge pay check they bearly work for and they yell at you like really wtf do you care you only knew me for a few years and bearly see me i haven seen a endo doctor in to years and everytime my blood is high which its always 450 or more they wanna hospitalise me and when i say no they get pissed

jayabee52 2012-11-10 00:38:13 -0600 Report

with a Blood Glucose reading of 450+ why do you say no? Do you have a death wish or something (like my newly Dx'd girlfriend)?

Anonymous 2012-11-10 00:47:44 -0600 Report

I dont know why i just ben to a few endo docs and im sick of getin yelled at let me live my life how i want to and im sick of the lecture i caint controll it sorry i tried very hard lots of times

Melode 2012-11-09 19:06:02 -0600 Report

I'm glad you found a new doctor! I hope this one will work out for you. You can also try to look up doctor ratings before you go see a new doctor, so you know more about their practice habits and such. You can read about doctor ratings here http://bit.ly/Wgcy7b . Best of luck!

locarbarbie 2012-10-10 11:11:20 -0500 Report

It never fails to amaze me how insensitive and downright ignorant people can be regarding weight. Someone who would never walk up to some one and say,"gee, you sure are ugly!", somehow has no problem pointing out that someone is overweight. The general public has no idea of how much willpower someone who is overweight actually has. I have probably lost well over 500 pounds over the course of my life, in increments…not all at once, lol. I have wondered also, which came first…diabetes or weight? I am convinced that I had weight issues for years prior to being diagnosed BECAUSE of my immune system going wacky and leading to my diabetic diagnosis, not that I caused it by overeating. I have always had to work three times as hard to keep my weight under control, not saying it can not be done. You are to be congratulated, not insulted by some sanctimonious, holier than thou, professional #%*^, uh, jerk in a white coat! I have tried to come up with some snappy reply, but they are all pretty profane and nasty! I give you credit for being a lady and not stooping to her level.

Nana_anna 2012-10-09 09:56:14 -0500 Report

No, no Dr. in the world has a right to yell at a patient. They can be concerned and get annoyed with us. But not to that extent! They should take into consideration that you've lost 70 lb all ready. They should know better than to get patients upset enough to make their blood pressure go sky high. This really irritates me. Give me your Dr. number?? I will chew them out for you! That is redicoulous! I do hope you are calmed down now really.

TsalagiLenape 2012-10-08 12:20:05 -0500 Report

That is totally unacceptable. Its unprofessional and its amazing you have lost the weight. Yes you may be genetically disposed to get diabetes but you are improving it. Next time you go to your doctor's office make sure to stress to your doctor how its hard to be patient while the doctor who is super busy and behind is late and you have to wait during that time so you dont lose your place to see the doctor. That these very things is upsetting and nerve wracking hence it will spike your blood pressure. As for the comments I would remind your doctor would you like someone saying this nonsense to your relative even if its true its rude and lowers the doctors I.Q. SO no worries ok? You did great! Keep on finding positive reasons to keep moving forward. Hugs

doggier 2012-10-07 22:59:56 -0500 Report

I am so sorry this doctor did you like that. That person should not even be a doctor!!!!!!!! People come in all shapes and sizes. This will never change. There will always be plus size, medium, and small size people in the world. And all different size people get all different types of diseases. That doctor has the problem. You keep up the fight to stay healthy. Don't let anybody make you feel bad.

draco59 2012-10-07 14:45:22 -0500 Report

First of all, that's a great job you've done, keep up the good work…I have the same problems, I'm also a type 2,over weight(close to 350) and hypertensive.. second is your Dr. an Endocrinologist???? Until March of this year, I was seen a Cardiologist and a Generalist only. In March my Cardiologist sent me to an Endocrinologist, first thing he was take in off my BS meds and put me on Victoza. I've lost about 50 lbs… I've been big, fat most of my life, had BP problems since high school… the Endocrinologist ran an Aldosterone Rennin level, and it was sky high, which is the main reason for my HP, but my weight didn't help it though… He put me on Spironolactone, now I'm half my BP meds. Just my opinion, your doctor should not be talking to you like that and if she no an Endocrinologist and even if she is, I'd be looking for a new Dr.
Good luck…

Mimiewal 2012-10-07 17:24:33 -0500 Report

yes That particular doctor is an Endocrinologist! and I totally agree that he shouldnt have said anything like that to me. But ever since he has shown great dicipline since I addresssed it.

MsCakes 2012-10-07 17:58:55 -0500 Report

I hope you stand up fpr yourself, if you do stay with this doctor, tell her how her words made you feel. If you decide to leave, I could't blame you. That was just rude and wrong. i wish you the best of luck.

hawk1962 2012-10-07 10:57:52 -0500 Report

Next time your comeback to this could be…I know I am fat and it didn't take me eight years of college and a doctor's degree to figure that out thank you very much! NOW what I need from you is you're expertise NOT your opinions and
rudeness! OR…I can tell I am fat and you need to learn how to tell time!

jayabee52 2012-10-07 14:10:07 -0500 Report

I believe it was Eleanor Roosevelt who said "Nobody can No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."

so don't give her your consent even within yourself!

Anonymous 2012-10-07 08:45:49 -0500 Report

sorry to hear your doctor put you down like that .nobody deserves to be talked to this way.you had the right to be mean back towards her.i don't blame for handling the way you did,someone needs to stand to her and let have it like you did good for you.

Type1Lou 2012-10-06 12:50:40 -0500 Report

Sounds like a lose-lose situation for both of you. We do hold our doctors to a higher standard and she was clearly out of line in her approach. Congratulations on your weight loss! Your stress undoubtedly increased your BP and contributed to your reaction. Perhaps your doctor was also stressed because she was running so far behind…still, not an excuse for her treatment of you. Hopefully you are continuing to take the steps needed to get to a healthy weight and properly manage your diabetes. Your doctor can guide you in the steps you need to take but only you can take the actions you need to better manage your condition. The past is past. You have diabetes now. What will you do/continue to do to manage your diabets?

watson4042 2012-10-06 11:34:38 -0500 Report

good for you…fight back! i'd also take that rudeness up with and management in the office, possibly another doctor with more authority. but at least, you need to tell your doctor that you won't tolerate abusive language.

Mimiewal 2012-10-06 10:20:44 -0500 Report

I am so sorry that was said to you! actually I am appauld! But I totally understand how you felt. I have an diabetes specialist that did that to me. My daughter is a type 1 diabetic & he was seeing us both at the same time. Imagine my embarrassment when he told me all these problems that you are having is because you are Fat! (said with full emphasis) I was shocked and my feelings were really hurt. & also this was our first visit in his office. So the next office visit oh yes I went back to him on purpose because 1. I am not a quitter and 2 I refuse to be bullied & degraded by anyone.
so I decided the next office visit I will tell him exactly how this mad me feel. & when I did he apologized immediately & now we are fine. so I am telling you this to encourage you, Talk to her & let her know what she said was 1 not professional, &2 you didnt appreciate her talking to you like that. You will feel better. & God bless you.

Nick1962 2012-10-05 12:12:13 -0500 Report

Sounds to me like your doctor probably felt like he/she had to make an impression on you and this was a last ditch effort. Some folks throw tact (and in some cases common sense) out the window to make a point. My doctor was/is quite the opposite – never made any issue of my obesity. At worst, if I complained of something, he might work in a “because of your weight” or something benign like that. I really didn’t take weight loss seriously because it seemed he didn’t worry too much about it either. So somewhere between your doctor and mine, there has to be the right one who will treat you with some degree of respect and compassion.
I found mine in my chiropractor. Early on she told me “I can treat you and get you feeling better, but if you continue with your weight and habits, it will only be temporary. I’ll still treat you, but you’ll still feel bad AND you’ll be making my boat payments.” I’m still with her, but I don’t own any part of her boat.

Almost forgot - congrats on all the weight you've dumped so far! I know that has to feel good.

BabyFroggee 2012-10-05 12:08:43 -0500 Report

I'm excited that you have lost all that weight! It is so hard to do and many blessings to you on your continued loss of weight! That is a milestone in itself!!!

It seems that dr's nowadays are less considerate of a patients feelings. I have one of those and am working to change my doctor. Let them have it right back. I've had to do that many a time with this one.

He has went as far as giving my 88 year old mother a letter to withdraw services to her if she doesn't come see him every 3 months. She's 88 with arthritis and COPD. She feels fine, mantains regular visits that she feels she needs and takes her medication and oxygen every day. She finds it more stressful to go see him when she feels perfectly fine and when she does ask for help because she knows there is something wrong, he blows her off and says it's a virus. Last time he did that she ended up in the hospital for a week with colitus.

In a nutshell, you know your body and how it reacts to stresses. I can understand why your bp was up, mine certainly would be. She had no reason to talk to you that way. I'm glad you reported her and hopefully that will take her down a notch. Many Blessings to you. Yvonne

jayabee52 2012-10-05 06:30:06 -0500 Report

I'm sure you all have seen the response with which the reporter replied to the hurtful comment made by a viewer. If you have not yet here it is ~


Kudos to her.

I pray your complaint to medicare was heard. Perhaps a complaint with your state's certification board for Drs would also be in order.

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2012-10-05 21:02:29 -0500 Report

I saw that on the news the other morning and was glad the reporter did what she did. Some people think they have a right to be as abusive as possible to anyone.

When I worked at the hospital, I managed the mail room and telephone operators. I went to work on afternoon and a nurse met me at the door to complain about an operator. I asked her to put it in writing. I went back to talk to the operator only to find she had left early. I was talking to the operator on duty when a security guard walked in and proceeded to call me every fat name she could think of. The thing is this was the first day of work at the hospital for this woman and I had never seen her before. My co-worker and I looked at each other and she said to her, you just signed your own death certificate. When the woman ran out of names to call me, I looked at her and said "I may be fat and I may be able to die thin. You on the other hand are an ugly person and unless you change which I doubt, you will die an ugly person" and put her out of the office. I picked up the phone, called my boss and told him either he gets rid of her or I will. Needless to say that was not only her last day at the hospital but also her last day working for the Security Company. When they came in with a replacement officer, she came crying to me and apologized. I simply said good-bye have a nice life and get out of my office. She didn't think what she was doing was wrong until she had to face the consequences of her behavior.

Set apart
Set apart 2012-10-05 06:14:18 -0500 Report

Congrats on your weight loss! I am so sorry your doctor treated you like this! I am glad you took the steps you did in reporting this kind of behavior! It never ceases to amaze me that individuals in certain professions are there for the money, convenience, etc…, yet have no people skills. You did nothing wrong in fact your doctor should be praising you, Drs are supposed to want to take care of others, after all isn't that why the chose this particular profession? Not all, but find another who has people skills! () hug!

annesmith 2012-10-05 02:15:39 -0500 Report

First off, when she said you CAUSED yourself to have diabetes, that's a huge red flag. The AUDACITY. I'm so sorry to capitalize my letters, but, the audacity. I'd have gotten up immediately and told her " DON'T say I got diabetes on purpose", then I'd have been so angry I'd never come back. Congratulations on your huge weight loss! I once signed on with a doctor that said on his first visit with me " I'll warn you right now..I warn all my patients…I do NOT like diabetes, and there is very little excuse for it. " I said " Wait a minute..what do you mean by that?" He said " You heard me right…I despise this illness, and ALL of my diabetic patients are REQUIRED to do bike marathons and go strictly vegetarian, no ifs, ands, or buts." I paused, took it all in. I gave him a chance to further introduce himself. He took the diagnosis I had from an excellent internist and said " You know what I think of this?" I said "What?" He said " It's not true..you are PRE diabetic." HA! I said " If that were the case, that'd be great, but it just is not true. I told him my numbers to more than prove it. He refused to listen to me at all. I got up and said " Just forget everything, then..this is ridiculous." He said " WELL, if you want to continue to live your life in DENIAL, as if you are a diabetic, then it's your choice!!! ANNE

red flower lady
red flower lady 2012-10-05 00:20:12 -0500 Report

If things went as you said, then I would report them to the medical board, BBB. I would call my insurance company as well as change drs, and even go so far as to charge the dr for the time you were left waiting.

I would have also explained that my BP was higher then normal due to the wait time as well as the bad days. Remind her that you are well aware of being so overweight, but that you have also lost 70 lbs which is awsome!!

GabbyPA 2012-10-04 20:22:16 -0500 Report

Wow, it amazes me how doctors can be like that. I don't care if they think it. I don't even care if they would have a civil conversation about it, but that kind of rudeness has to leave her sleepless. Maybe she too was just having a really, really bad day?

Mrs.Sweet 2012-10-05 15:44:55 -0500 Report

Yes she was having a rotten day, she was running very behide from what the staff said then she had said that she was on pain due to a tooth falling out. I have made a complaint to my health care company just for her being so rude. Also looking for a new Dr. Thank you all of you.

GabbyPA 2012-10-08 09:45:29 -0500 Report

It isn't fair, but sometimes we just happen to be the straw that breaks the camels back. She should have apologized to you. If not, I would certainly move on, but let her know why. She cannot change if she is not aware, so you really should let her know why you are leaving her practice.

Libra1969 2012-10-04 11:13:30 -0500 Report

pretty sure if my doc talked to me like that, it would be time to find a new one. That is totally uncalled for not to mention unprofessional. Wow!! Hope that you gave that doctor a good piece of your mind

CJ55 2012-10-04 10:16:32 -0500 Report

OMG!! I am soooo sorry that this happened to you. I am overweight as well and I have had doctors say some cruel things to me as well. yes, I know I am overweight, yes I know I need to exercise more and eat better. I don't need to hear this everytime I see my doctors. Some Doctors just think they are god and can say what ever the he** they want to, to their patients. Well, what if they didn't have "us" patients, then they wouldn't have a darn job would they. I had a bad run in with a doctor of mine in the past, as of right now, he is NO longer practicing medicine. I did my research on him, spoke to other patients of his, god a lot of the same feedback, then presented my case to him actually. He pretty much told me to go to hatti and back and I said we shall just see. That letter I wrote was published in the local newspaper and to the medical borad and many others. He got his day he deserved. It was well worth my time and effort to hurt him. He had hurt many people who trusted him. I am very glad I did. So, please speak out, if you don't like how you are being treated by your physician or the staff members, let others know and do something about it. Our world has too many bullies out there hurting good kind hearted people. Good Luck…

MAYS 2012-10-04 10:12:55 -0500 Report

If you are not satisfied with the treatment that you are receiving from your doctor, or feel that your doctor is being judgemental and verbally abusive to you, i suggest that you consider seeing another doctor, the added stress of dealing with someone that you do not want to deal with is (for whatever the reason) simply put, not worth it.

pontufex 2012-10-04 09:26:00 -0500 Report

I like people who speak there minds, especially doctors, BUT I don't like it when they don't think before they open their mouths. It surprises me that some of the most ignorant, simple minded people I know have college degrees.
It astounds me how it's okay to insult, humiliate, mock, degrade, and downplay over-weight people, and what's worse is that these idiots are the same people crying out for the quality of everyone…hypocrites!

I'm glad to see you didn't just set there and take it, but I would also suggest you call your states medical licensing board and inform them of this doctors unethical treatment of you.

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2012-10-04 12:08:13 -0500 Report

Pontufex we refer to those people as educated idiots. If you notice Common Sense isn't so common anymore. People mock, humiliate, insult and degrade people different from them because if makes them feel important. The worse are those who have lost a lot of weight, have a weight problem, those who smoked and stopped and those who are simply mean people. They have no control of anything in their lives so they take that out on others.

There are two things that cannot be taken from you, self respect and self esteem. You have to give those away. Once you do that and let others have control over your emotions and your life, you suffer for it. You basically are wearing a sign that says "Kick Me" or "Door Mat" on your forehead and back.

If you don't stand up and speak up when someone does something to you, they think it is okay to continue to mistreat you. I was happy when the TV Anchor responded to the person who e-mailed her about her weight. The fact of the matter is that people get more ignorant each day and they think it is okay to do mean and nasty things to others simply for their pleasure.

DeanaG 2012-10-04 09:18:47 -0500 Report

Gratz on the 70 pound loss!!! That is awesome and I know how hard that is to do!!
I would file complaints and write letters to every agency I could find, write a letter to the doctor and find another doctor as soon as possible.
Best of luck finding a caring doctor, they are out there. ;-)

s l k
s l k 2012-10-04 07:16:25 -0500 Report

I am so sorry that happened to you. I myself had some trouble finding an endocrinologist that treated me like a human. It's hard to comply when they won't consider your life when making a treatment plan. Unfortunately, I ended up nearly dead in the ER with BS of 700+ and very low potassium. Found the most amazing endo though and it makes me pro-active. It's also sad that she put you down - THAT in itself can cause a person to rebel. Good luck in your search for a great doctor, they are out there!

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2012-10-04 10:36:47 -0500 Report

Irregardless of how you are treated by your doctor. It should never be hard to comply when it comes to your health. Never ever put your health totally in the hands of your doctor you have to be an active participant because after all it is your health. You have to always remain vigilant when it comes to your own health. If you don't like the way you are treated, try to find another doctor and tolerate this person until you can. Always do what you can to take care of yourself. I am sorry to hear about what happened to you and I am glad you found a doctor who treated you like a person and not a dollar sign. I think some people who go into the medical field let their egos become larger than their compassion for the people they are treating and this makes it hard for the patient to want to come for a doctors visit.

s l k
s l k 2012-10-04 11:06:53 -0500 Report

I totally agree with the compasion thing…and there have been times in the 17 years since my diagnosis (many times) when my A1c was very close to a normal level…I make no excuses for putting things above my health, but I also have told my family and close friends that I am not about to let that happen again, and at this point, I plan every bite of food that goes in my mouth…and watch carefully. Thank you for your comments…

eristar 2012-10-04 06:08:55 -0500 Report

Wow, that is really terrible. What kind of bedside manner is that????? Good luck with your search for a new doc - you deserve better! And congratulations on that 70 pounds - believe me, I know how tough it is to lose weight!

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2012-10-03 23:12:21 -0500 Report

I would sue her and find a new doctor. If she is part of a medical group I would file a complaint. The last time a doctor told me that I said you really are not the sharpest knife in the drawer if you have your staff schedule pts for you when you know you do not come into the office till two hours later. Of course my BP is high I had to wait for you to come in and I am pissed completely off. He was never in the office on Wednesday till 11 but had his staff schedule patients to come in at 9 am. I never went back.

MAYS 2012-10-04 10:08:54 -0500 Report

A new doctor, yes, lawsuit, no.
That allegation (true or not) would be classified and dismissed as here say, unless those exact words were in a text form of some sort or heard by others…never easy to prove in a court of law.

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2012-10-04 10:30:51 -0500 Report

That is true but we don't know if anyone overheard the doctor.

MAYS 2012-10-04 11:39:02 -0500 Report

Very true, even if so most people would not want to give a statement saying so against their doctor out of fear.

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2012-10-04 11:45:03 -0500 Report

I agree with that also but there could be a patient willing if the doctor has done the same thing to them. At any rate she really needs another doctor.

Harlen 2012-10-03 19:08:12 -0500 Report

I would sue big time !!!
Thats just not right
Look for a new Doc the one you have will not be able to help you at all
Keep up the great work hun
Best wishes

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