Diabetic Connect Is Not is Here For Competing

By Latest Reply 2009-05-17 21:02:59 -0500
Started 2008-11-24 09:36:01 -0600

You know I did take this away and do not know how it is in top rated. Must be a mistake, but the message is clear; We do not need to compete, we need to enjoy the site, contribute, learn and meet friends, read news articles, videos show reactions to others' who post in a different way. There are all types of useful ways to enjoy this site, without trying to take control of it. You do not just simply posts that someone else posted for an ego power lift; Post things that you really need or offer to the site.

57 replies

alwaystryin 2009-05-17 21:02:59 -0500 Report

Please allow me to understand this discussion. There is an element in the Diabetic and non-Diabetic community, that *thinks* that being engaged, and active in being a Diabetic is some sort of competition.

That is the ONE THING that brought me to, and has kept me as a (proud) Member of the DiabeticConnect Family.

And no one can show this needed mentality more than Mr. Crowell, as he has shown by not only his dedication to this Site, but keep in mind that, oh yea, HE, just as all, non-D and D's alike, have a life outside of being Diabetic.

So as *we* can not please all the people all the time, at least allow all, to have the option of exploring all aspects.

Thomas R. Moore

G Thomas
G Thomas 2009-01-04 21:24:52 -0600 Report

Hello Everyone!
Funny this subject should come up. Edie was talking about something similar last evening. Sorta, she spoke of there being so many of us that we can't keep up with our friend or discussion. She mention a section for those that have left this world and I subjested John take a peek at coming up with some close to Edie's idea or/and a place where those that have to leave us like Cheish did can say goodbye. I really have meet nice people here and would hate to lose any of you. We are a group of loving and caring people. Sure we air out our dirty laundry also. I for one like not only getting info on my condition but someone might actually keep me from doing something stupid otherwise. I appreciate every little thing that is contributed to me. And for the record I didn't even realize that we had a point system for months. I saw the numbers but I really did'nt know the system. I have grown here and John and Morris and a few others Toma too have help me to be a little more efficent on my computor. I am a very seerious person sometimes to serious. Ans at times I might sound a bit gruff. I have alway been called that due to me saying exactly what I feel. It is relaxing to be straight forward and truthful. At my old job which was at Goodwill here in Melbourne,FL. I always got wrote up for not dealing with people like children. People that have disabilities are very funny. They want to be treated equal. Not like children and I felt that if they need a baby sitter then we sure hire one cause if I gave an assignment I expected it done in a timely fashion. Like everyone else. So I hell the same tone around. In other words, We are adults. We are going to have attitudes that need ajusting every now and then. But, we don't have to be everyones punching bag. We are humans and we need love to. And that is what this is all about. Giving to those that need us. If someone is getting to personal then deal with them. And if you chose to remain out of a discussion that to is your choice. Thinga I don't want to be part of I am a duck with. (rolls off my back) Other things like this just makes me a normal person. I speak what I feel is right. It doesn't have to be. But, Its out of me. There are people on this sight that will not get into a discussion if I am in it. They will answer everyone but me. He, needs prayer not, brow beating. So, you see ladies we are many with much to learn. And guys of course.

2009-01-04 19:38:06 -0600 Report

I guess with over 52 replies and I don't know how many views that this discussion is not really helpful to readers. I am not sure what I did wrong, but I must have done something right to get so many viewers; any advice? How can I make this better?

Debe Pendice
Debe Pendice 2008-12-19 07:55:07 -0600 Report

I have been really enjoying this site. The discussions have been interesting and informative to me. I have learned so much and really appreciate everyone who has been contribuating and helping in educating people here looking for help and support. Thanks again…Debe

2008-12-30 16:33:13 -0600 Report

It really appearss to me that the site is shaping up and looking good again. I am happy to see that; a little fun is ok. but spending half the day to get to the issues is ridiculous. Thanks. Claudia

LadyDi - 26259Miller
LadyDi - 26259Miller 2008-12-30 16:47:52 -0600 Report

I withdrew for a brief period, because of some of the discussions and comments. I did read the discussions every few days, but did not log in or comment. I do believe that the topics and comments have improved, and that there is some very helpful information and support being offered now. Hope it stays that way, because it's badly needed.

LadyDi - 26259Miller
LadyDi - 26259Miller 2008-12-30 19:12:18 -0600 Report

Your so sweet. Thanks. I enjoy being back and perhaps adding a little help and encouragement now and then…and receiving it, of course. This year is about shot, but we have another new year of opportunities about to open up.

2009-01-01 08:25:54 -0600 Report

So glad you are back, Lady Di and that you agree that the site is changing for the better. With good friends and good discussions how could it be anything else. Claudia

LadyDi - 26259Miller
LadyDi - 26259Miller 2009-01-01 09:13:14 -0600 Report

Thanks, Claudia. I certainly do enjoy all of your posts and find them helpful and encouraging. There are some wonderfully warm and caring people on this site, and you are certainly one of them. Thanks for your long distance friendship!

2008-12-17 05:37:49 -0600 Report

Apparently some of you are right there are some negative reactions to this post as well as possitive. SO I decided to continue for a while and see where it goes. Thanks for the support

2008-12-19 07:22:52 -0600 Report

Well, I do not know if you agree, but I can definitely see some good posts coming forward, and much more informative and helpful, and a few fun ones like, I believe it is, Rich157, just trying to remember so you can read it. 62 years of type 1, I think that is the name, close, anyway read it and ask him for more, he has some great discussions that are a delight, and uplifting to read, so thanks Rich. Claudia

2008-12-16 05:57:17 -0600 Report

I guess because everyone who has posted replies understands the reason for this one, even though I had deleted it a while ago; It was helpful, because It was reopened

Debe Pendice
Debe Pendice 2008-12-16 06:03:42 -0600 Report

I feel now with all the recent old discussions telling all the new friends to go thru all the discussions for later dates it has helped a little. I know everyone can't get through all the past discussion in a day. But if you aren't busy it is something to check out. I have learned alot from the past discussion. So, I would suggest if you have extra time on your hands it is of your own interest to read and enjoy…Debe

2008-12-16 07:26:38 -0600 Report

I think we started this at the same time, but yes you are right, and I am back stronger than ever to help make this site what everyone wants and needs,After I had deleted so many posts, I have had people ask me why, that they were helpful to them. So some have been reopened, and for those of you who have read my posts and left such replies, thanks friends for all your support. I am coming out of this depression because of all of you. luv:->)Claudia

Anonymous 2008-12-08 18:04:51 -0600 Report

If this was not helpful, how come it got so many views and replies, there has to be something here, for them good or bad.

Goddess 2008-12-04 07:24:01 -0600 Report

At least some of us care enough about to say good things to them.

2008-12-06 07:06:34 -0600 Report

There is such a thing as "Too Much of A Good Thing Can Be Bad," and I am not saying that to upset you Diane, I have always tried to be your friend. I am just hoping that you know that what seems to be happening is new people are looking at the site, and only seeing chit chat first, feel they aren't going to learn anything here. I know because I invited my family and friends and was very surprised that they did not want to join this site for that reason, and just went elsewhere; I wanted to give them a chance to see and learn what I was learning, but you have to look back months and months to find those relevant discusssions. So yes, while it is nice to say goodmorning; once a day is good; or birthday, once a month is good. and to tell the truth giving such information over the web is not all that safe; especial for computer hackers. Sorry, Diane, I would like us to be friends again, let's true to make peace and compromise with the discussions. Claudia

2008-12-08 06:49:16 -0600 Report

No-one here should have to compete for friends because everyone offers to be your friend, and yes there are clicks here like everywhere else, where certain people tend to read certain posts, and new ones as they come out in order weed out who you discuss with, and if you want to still respond to a discussion from someone you don't often read, but they come up with something of interest, you are also welcome to reply.

2008-12-08 18:03:06 -0600 Report

And I try very hard to care about everyone I talk to, but everyone reaches their limit, after trying to apologize from very first thing I posted that i thought might have hurt someones feelings, and I kept sending them with no response, which shows to me that they don't care enough about hurting other people, and I am not going to beat myself worrying anymore.

Debe Pendice
Debe Pendice 2008-12-04 07:17:52 -0600 Report

I love the discussions. I do try to respond once and if I feel I could add to a comment or question some has, I do. I love learning all I can on diabetes and love hearing all responses. But so do become chat sessions and that fine, I will steer clear. I don't feel its wrong. I just would like a section on this site for Chat. If I want to cjat I will got to that section , see whats up to chat about not referring to diabetic infor and talk to them. I see no wrong with that. I try to understand that people spend the wole day on here and thats fine. I myself spend at least an hour morning,then noon and night. If I'm up all night I pop on here and there. This is a place for some people to reach out to others that don't see many and have someone to talk to. Thats great, but the need a section on this site to do this. I to like discussions on family traditions, birthdays etc, but I mainly like the diabetic discussions best. That is why I'm here. But after I go through the diabetic dissussions I would probably go to the chat to see whats up. Its not that I wouldn't repy to those, I probably would . Be that is not my main concern. But this is freedom of speech…Debe

kdroberts 2008-11-25 08:00:09 -0600 Report

I'll keep it short but I agree that there are people who try to compete and "be the best" and the older the site gets, the less useful diabetes information is posted and the more social networking type of thing is being posted along with subjects put into the wrong categories (just look at "site feedback" and see hundreds of posts that are nothing to do with site feedback) and it gets harder and harder to find posts on subjects you want to read or know about. It does seem that it's morphing slowly from a diabetes help, support and informational site to something more on the lines of myspace or facebook with a loose tie in to diabetes.

On the points side of thing. Even though they are meaningless you get more and different colored stars. Some people feel if they have to have one more or different colored stars to everyone else they are superior.

Anonymous 2008-11-25 09:30:32 -0600 Report

Thank you KD as I am getting tried of some of the posts that are being put up and have NOTHING to do with Diabetes.

2008-11-25 11:49:15 -0600 Report

That is all exactly what I meant. We need to get this site back on the road. It is alright to have a few fun sites, and interaction with friends, but not when every single site posted takes up half your day to read, and replied. And start out today with only looking and posting info I need. Like the one I posted about Diabetes First, But no one has acknowledged it I guess. Again; Thanks Lilmarm & Jim

2008-12-04 06:49:06 -0600 Report

It is also very important for the newcombers to actually see posts about the illness when they first come in. I have learned through people that I invited that they think the site is not informative enough, and is a chat fest; that is because what they see in the first three pages of discussions or so, everyone saying hi, talking to their friends, and so on, and then they are rated 100% so that only tells you how useful a discussion is; well, yeah they are useful, but, not to someone to see when they first come on.

Amy Tenderich
Amy Tenderich 2008-11-25 00:26:28 -0600 Report

Hi Everybody,

I'm really surprised by this discussion thread, considering that the folks at Alliance Health (creators of the Diabetic Connect site) haven't even decided themselves yet exactly what the points will be used for.

I know it's human nature to want to "get ahead," but really -- this site is for chatting and learning and support.

(btw, if you really want to win stuff, I am hosting an actual contest with lots of prizes over at my site right now:



2008-11-25 06:40:41 -0600 Report

I think your idea is great; give the competitive people something to win. It seems like people want to be noticed more and more, and in the process get more points. I do not know what is so important myself, but it seems some people are using this site for self satisfaction more than information. You can have fun and relaxing threads, but get back to the reason we are here, Diabetes First, that is what is satisfying to read and learn about. We need more discussions about the illness.

GabbyPA 2008-11-25 07:05:31 -0600 Report

I think because this illness is so far reaching, beyond testing and injections, that as some of us have grown with the site, we have posted many of those things in past discussions. Now we are looking into other avenus of our general health. When I have a questions that I need answered, I search thru the old posts first to see if what I need is in there. There is a lot of great stuff here, you just have to look for it sometimes.

Bertlette 2008-11-24 23:31:25 -0600 Report

Hello to everybody out there in diabetic land, I have met some wonderful people out there, It may be a few people out there who think it's necessary to compete with other's. I personally felt very welcome with the one's invited me to become their friend as well as the one's I invited into my heart. They have giving me very good advise, especially since I was just diagnoised this past April. If you guy's did not discuss the diabetic medicine Metformin, I still probably would have been shakey and very sick, I talk to my primary care doctor and he suggested that I take the met. as well as my injectiable insulin.

I truly thank you all, I have to say being on this site and having someone out here going threw many of the same ailments, and having people to vent my problems with is a great feeling.

Caring & Sharing,

anitamusser 2008-11-24 20:19:51 -0600 Report

I want to say that i post my numbers daily because it helps me to see how i am doing. My numbers have been high a lot the past few days and after posting my numbers and what i am eating someone noticed that i was probably eating too much bread. I appreciated that comment and was grateful for the help. That is what this site is all about, helping each other control our diabetes and not let diabetes control us. I log on the site several times a day to see if there are any new discussions, to see if i have anything in my inbox, to lift my spirits, to occupy myself when i am bored at home, to read the news articles. Those are some of the reasons i log on multiple times a day, not for points. If so many people are not interested in the points then why not ask management to take the points thing off?

sparkysmom 2008-11-24 19:12:21 -0600 Report

I could care less about the points. I just read and reply and ask for friends as I see fit. Maybe they should have more categories. I do enjoy the motivational stuff too. Lets suggest more cats to John and see what he says. That is a good idea lilmarm.

sparkysmom 2008-11-25 09:34:57 -0600 Report

Not sure if this is the place to put this… I come to this site for information on diabetes. I also come to this site for encouragement on down days and to met people who understand those downs. It is both an educational and a networking site for me. Isn't it possible for it to be both? Maybe just a few more categories for those of us who also want to network with other diabetics. It has helped me to come here and talk with people who understand what I am going through. I have both Facebook , My space and infield parking,but I can't tell people there what I am going through on any given day. They just don't understand. Everybody here does. I guess what I'm saying is right or wrong this site serves a dual purpose for me. Please don't change that. Maybe the powers that be could just rearrange things a little. (Ex programmer here and I know that would be a lot of work) . I'll shut up now.

vgarrison 2008-11-25 11:46:18 -0600 Report

I agree,

I come here to meet other diabetics as well as get information…thats some of the best parts of this site..


caspersmama 2008-11-24 10:32:37 -0600 Report

I do know what you are saying and now I will say my opinion. One of the things that annoys me is that when you join here you are bombarded with friend invites. I did not know anyone so I accepted all of them. Then I got all kinds of mass mailings and it became a problem. That has since been fixed. But now unless I have read a post or talked to you in some way, I now ignore the friend invites I get. If this seems rude I am sorry. There are some of you that are on my friends list but I bet alot are not. Not because of any reason just because I am not in the numbers game. If I want to invite you I will, only if I know you. I have been on here awhile and just did some the other day that I post with everyday.
With that being said I want to make another comment. I agree with the posts about this site has become alot of high school drama. We are all in this together and the site should be about helping each other obtain the best we can be with our health. Not to compete, not to judge, not to get big activity numbers. Somewhere along the line, since I have been here, we have lost sight of that. There are alot of post lately about leaving, staying or going to. I feel, just make the decision and do it. Do not make a big deal about it. Either leave, go or stay. I am very sorry if this has offended anyone but these are my opinions. If you disagree or agree, I am sure you will post about it.

sexyswamprat 2008-11-24 10:52:34 -0600 Report

When I signed up for the site I was one that sent a mass mail. I'm sure you recall the issue that we had. I do wish that there had been something to read letting me know some of the things that would happen when you do certain things on the site. Like, when you send a mass mail everyone that you send it to is going to get all the responces that are intended just for you. This was a bad way to start off on the site. But could have been a voided had there been alittle more info on using the site. Anyways, I am glad that we were able to fix the problem and know that we have talked a few times I did send you a friend request and it was accepted. I must admitt that in the beginning I was just adding friends and sending invites just to get points. Happy to say I no longer participate in that activity. I mean really, I am I ever gonna send messages to all 500 something that are on my list. I don't thinks so. I do as you do know. If I have talked with you on one subject or another I will send a invite. It works out so musch better. And I apoliges for my "tone" and the way I choose to handle our issue. It was rude of me and not called for at all.

caspersmama 2008-11-24 11:02:00 -0600 Report

I have since forgotten all about it being you until you just mentioned it. I was just making a point did not mean only you. I enjoy your posts and your name. Your friend, ilvtony20

vgarrison 2008-11-24 10:53:11 -0600 Report

unfortunetly there are going to be times when not all of us agree…that is the way it works in a "real life" family, so I'm sure it's going to happen on here again as well. The best and worst is the fact that we are all so very different. Some of us are white, black, brown, gay, straight, christian, catholic, methodist, lutheran, agnostic, athiest, or wiccan. Because of this diversity we will get more perspectives, but on the flip side because of this we will also not all agree on all of the subjects. The only thing we can do is try to get our opinions worded as to not hurt or infuriate another person. Just think to yourself, if this was geared towards me would this offend me, if the answer is yes, then reword and rephrase, and try again.

Blessed Be

2008-11-24 10:57:19 -0600 Report

That is one of my big points. I do not see enough posts and discussions about the actual illness, but I am learning that some new people have been starting with some great contributions, and some of my older friends seem to be following them, too. and maybe that is the best way to handle it. Move on to newer and better information. Lately I have had to look back months for what I need. Often times ending up asking a question someone else did because could not find it. Friends:->0

caspersmama 2008-11-24 11:06:22 -0600 Report

Exactly, I think the motivation/emotions section is where most of the post are coming from these days. We need to get back to the actual subjects. Especially since the holidays are coming up and some, probably me too, are going to have questions, problems and things come up to discuss. This will be my first holiday season in 4 years without insulin. I know things are going to come up I will need help with.

vgarrison 2008-11-24 11:46:57 -0600 Report

I'm so happy for you, but its gotta be scary as well…I'm sure you will do great, you are one strong woman!!!


2008-11-24 19:46:16 -0600 Report

I see that the problem with discussion sites and the fact that this is used the most; is because of limitations of choices. I suggested; physician. Dealing with other illness too. Lady's Issues, Mens' issue. We need to get new categories for we need. I guess we should make some more suggestions right to John.

sexyswamprat 2008-11-24 10:30:18 -0600 Report

I am not sure that I agree that people are posting things to compete with one another or to gain points. I think as long as your are not offending anyone it is your choice to use the site as you wish. To post what you wish, even if others don't think it is useful. I don't remember reading any rules or regulatations when I joined the site, do you? Should it really matter to others how many points one has? Or how many friends one has. In my opinion, until health alliance or whoever controls this site decides that it is time for rules or guidelines, and makes them available for EVERYONE to read, people can post and do as they wish without others telling or making them feel that they are wrong in do so. This is just one persons opinion. And just a reminder, everything on this site is strictly voluntary. You do have a choice to view or not view, to post or not post.

2008-11-24 10:51:31 -0600 Report

I agree to that also; I am just trying to say that there is less actual discussions about stuff we really need to learn, and more that seem like just for please/self-satifaction. I feel you are truly one of my friends and do not want to anger you, so I thought I would explain. :->0 Claudia

vgarrison 2008-11-24 10:24:25 -0600 Report

I know I log on here several times a day, but it has nothing to do with the points…if I have commented on something and am waiting for a reply then I'll log on, when i see the reply I'll comment again…thats the great thing about this site, is the back and forth. By that I don't mean the bickering…there is a way to have a normal mature debate without nit picking and hurting peoples feelings…


GabbyPA 2008-11-24 10:05:17 -0600 Report

I know for myself, the points don't mean much. I have certain people that I love to learn from and the ones that I don't get as much from. Everyone has a part and we just have to manuver around the ones that just don't meet our specific needs.

It is frustrating to have one word comments added that don't really help, but I am not the point police, so I just ignore it. There will always be competitive people, and when they earn what they can, they will move on and the rest of us who use it for getting advice and sharing useful thoughts and information will keep on going.

So don't get too worried about the point thing...weed thru what you want and reply to what you feel is valuable. The rest will fall to the side.

2008-11-24 09:53:36 -0600 Report

I tend to agree with you on the competition 'mood' lately. I don't post my numbers daily or get too involved personally except for with a few because I feel the 'judgement' in the tone of some of the posts and the sniping at each other is a little out of hand. I personally am wondering if the new tone of the site is actually worth it and am considering just fading out and not responding anymore. This isn't a competition to see who had good numbers and who didn't or who is right and who is wrong, it's a site to get information and to help people and to meet friends that are going through the same things as you are. Everyone is entitled to their opinion and that's a fact of life but please remember when we post something that 'EVERYONE' is entitled to their opinion not just the person posting. Adios!!

highlandcitygirl 2008-11-24 10:09:06 -0600 Report

not sure myself what you are talking about, i personally thought posting our numbers was something to help us get an idea of where they are supposed to be, or a way to encourage someone,not so much to do better,but to hang in there. i know that because of my posting there i recieved a private letter encouraging me to talk to my doctor about certain issues. i am glad that they did!

sexyswamprat 2008-11-24 10:36:02 -0600 Report

Post of daily numbers was never intended to be a competion. And I don't believe the "tone" of the post is going that way either. I find it very useful to see what kind of numbers others are having. And offer encouragement when I choose to.

caspersmama 2008-11-24 10:40:14 -0600 Report

I knew there would be problems with this. Because when we were thinking about starting it, there were people that thought it would be a bad idea.

2008-11-24 10:45:55 -0600 Report

I think you misread; we are talking about points earned for posting, or one competing to outdo the other. It is ridiculous.

caspersmama 2008-11-24 10:58:15 -0600 Report

No Judy started talking about posting daily numbers and that is what I was saying that I knew it would cause a problem for some. The competing for activity numbers is ridiculous because there is no kind of reward pay off.

Dancehawk 2009-05-17 20:25:30 -0500 Report

Hi Judy! hugs!
I read your post here please do not fade, once in a while with every site we get a few bad apples and they tend to poof after a bit, bare with us here cause we need you.

huggles Catherine