Teenagers - and friends

Eggos_sis
By Eggos_sis Latest Reply 2008-08-01 08:51:39 -0500
Started 2008-05-15 11:41:33 -0500

So, my little sis, age 17, is a super cool person. But she wants to be so normal that she doesn't take care of her diabetes when she is around friends. I have tried so hard to get her to explain to them how important it is or to try to find friends that will understand that she has to take care of it - but unfortunately, she refuses. Any suggestions????


14 replies

DiabetesDiva
DiabetesDiva 2008-08-01 08:51:39 -0500 Report

I remember when my niece & nephew were teenagers. Of course we could not tell them anything. I remember being the same way. She probably does not realize how serious Diabetes is. Maybe joining an online group for Teens would be a good starting point. Sometimes it's easier saying things online. I have adult friends who have not told certain people in their life because they blame themselves for diabetes. She may be surprised how many famous young people have Diabetes.

She's lucky to have such a loving and supportive sister.

Good luck-

Kate

rj
rj 2008-07-31 08:36:53 -0500 Report

I have been trying to talk to my 14 year old about the frustrations of diabetes and the benefit of eating right and exercise to help avoid and or prolong him getting diabetes…being it on both sides of my family I have type 2 and also on his Mom's side. I had him sit down with me in here today…And low and behold here is this discussion…just wanted to say thanks for a great discussion AGAIN!!! If you can get family on this site too I recommend it… I believe after looking at some of our woes in here he realizes his PRIVELAGE of good health maybe something will stick. Thanks again you guys and gals

Frustrated mom
Frustrated mom 2008-07-31 08:06:41 -0500 Report

As a Mom with a 16 yr old with type 1 I can tell you that I understand where you are coming from, my son use to be like that with his friends, but I sat him down and told him that if he wanted to go place and hang out with his friends then he would have to tell them about his diabetes. At first I think that he was scared, scared that they would think that he was weird, but after he told them, they understood and even wanted to know more about it. It is so hard on teenager, because they do not want to be different. Don't be to hard on her, she will get through this. If she is willing she may want to talk to a counselor (just to get her through the rough times). Good Luck!!!!

Melissa Dawn
Melissa Dawn 2008-07-23 12:53:41 -0500 Report

Hello! I can understand a teenagers desire to fit in, but as someone who made it safely through the teen years with diabetes, I would say it's probably not going to be as big a deal as her friends think. I never was afraid to tell my friends what I could or could not do because of my diabetes, and never once did any of them act bothered. Tell her to give her friends a little more credit. Chances are, it won't be as big a deal to them as she's worrying that it will. She can still go with them wherever they go, she just needs to watch that she doesn't join in on the food fests.

And, as already stated, if after telling her friends what she needs to do they really do have a problem with it — get some new friends. Friends who would have you ignore your health to be one of the crowd aren't worth the effort.

diabeticmidfielder
diabeticmidfielder 2008-07-23 02:17:02 -0500 Report

Ok, as a teenager with diabetes I'm going to be a little more frank and harsh on this one than everyone else has. If your sister is afraid that her friends will think she's weird or won't like her anymore because of diabetes—she needs to get new friends. This is no longer a diabetes problem, but a friend problem. Last time I checked, friends like you for who you are, not because they think you're cool, or because you seem perfectly normal. Your little sister can't control the fact that she has diabetes, but she MUST control her diabetes if she wants to live a long, healthy, prosperous life. If hanging with her current friends prevents her from doing that, then it's time to meet some new people.

Again, I'm sorry for how frank and harsh I am being, but like I said, your friends should not care about your diabetes, and if they do, then they certainly aren't fit to be your friends.

kdroberts
kdroberts 2008-07-23 02:35:36 -0500 Report

I'm no teenager but I think this is spot on, maybe even a little light.

Real friends won't only not care if you have to do something different to stay healthy but will encourage and help you do it. Maybe if they don't fully understand they will try to help in ways that aren't really that helpful or they will be over cautious at first, but the point is, they try. Pretty soon it will be so normal that they won't even think twice about it.

It sounds like the OPs sister hasn't really talked to them about her diabetes. She may be surprised by what happens if she does.

Ginacaps
Ginacaps 2008-05-20 06:31:40 -0500 Report

It sounds to me like your little sis is in denial. A common thing amongst adolescents with diabetes. As if being a teen is hard enough add diabetes and it gets even harder. The best thing to do is to reassure her that she is NORMAL and she just has to do extra things to keep herself healthy. If she feels uncomfortable in front of her friends maybe its because she never explained to them about diabetes and that she needs to check her blood and take insulin. Maybe you can help her tell them and help them understand.

jupton1
jupton1 2008-05-15 13:56:20 -0500 Report

I think Your sister needs to no she is normal.Maby talking to a L.I.S.W. would help her cope..Dont ever give up on her & stand by her all the way..Ill say a prayer for You both,best of luck..John

Eggos_sis
Eggos_sis 2008-05-16 04:30:49 -0500 Report

Thanks for your reply. I do try to let her know that she is completely normal, but she feels that testing and taking her insulin when friends are around makes her un-normal. Trust me - I will NEVER give up on her! She is an awesome kid - she just needs to realize that herself! Well - thanks for the support- by the way - what is lisw?