I am very aware of how I feel, physically, and emotionally, this week, and how much work I have to do for this weekend, feeling like this. It all looks so impossible; I have only today-early saturday morning to do all I need to do, without much help. Mostly, because my own way of doing things. I always have to re-do, or clean up after someone who tries to do it for me. I have gotten curtains and throw rugs through the wash, and also shower curtains; trying to freshen the air indoors and elliminate the smells of smoke.I do this often, it includes washing blinds, walls, curtains, shampooing carpets, and all the other cleaning, last minute shopping (with no car, because my husband hit a deer saturday after work with his motorcyle,that he would much rather take to work, now matter what the weather,so he has my car)no-one to help it as far as the store goes, and my husband gets home late, and I am going to really have to push myself to go then; when usually, I am in the wheel chair by mid day, from pain and lack of use of my back and legs.) So first thing this morning I need encouragement to shampoo carpets; so they will dry before he comes home; then also shampoo the furniture; that is my fault cause of me, we have two, very loveable pekes; a father and son; used to have eleven after last breed; we kept two. Anyway, their hair sheds bad this time of year; hence, vacuum and shampoo furniture, also. I am also putting off seeing the multiple sceloris specialist until after this party. I need to do this first, before tackling this new illness; which, obviously has affected my life about a year now, but because of my pacemaker, took that long to diagnose, so I just found out a week ago. I will put that off, and now face the task ahead.MY DAUGHTER, Her 25th birthday and Graduation party!!!!!
I so need to do something special for her, for myself, because she has took on the job of my care at the early, early age of 4, and by 7 she knew exactly what to do and how to do it; taking time away from herself and her needs, and cared for me up until I married Jim 5 years ago, next week. Now she has problems letting go of that responsibility; so therefore; she is one special daughter and she needs to feel that, from ME
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