Stress factors: Family

By TsalagiLenape Latest Reply 2014-06-20 11:54:17 -0500
Started 2011-12-08 06:58:21 -0600

I know what my main stress factors is in my life. The crap my family believes I should take care, deal with and etc for them. They are the major stress factors in my life. If I was bold enough, I would tell them. Yet I know it would go thru one ear and out the other. So I am doing the best I can coping with it til I can finish school and then get a job. After that, I dont care really. I am doing my best to find the silver lining behing everything. They treat me like crap with no respect. Yet DEMAND it and I had best do as they say or its Chaos H*ll here for me. Sort of like getting punished for NOT doing as they DEMAND. Then they threaten me in various ways. Well guess what people? I aint doing what you DEMAND nor when and etc. Its not my screw ups that is my priority. My life is my PRIOTY! My health, happiness and moving forward. They talk of what I should do and etc. Mainly its for their benefit. Well I am not doing it. They arent my parents. Besides my mother is dead! Yes I know my mistakes and have apologized for them. Its up to those who I offended to accept the apology. If they dont its on them not me anymore. Their emergency isnt my prioty. Now going to let them find out what happens when you do X Y Z and PDQ for I am done. I am going to find my life, make it happen, make myself better and happier for me. I dont want love if it comes with demands and lack of respect. I dont want a family if there are strings that they can pull and expect me to jump thru their loops and etc like at a circus. I dont want chaos nor anything else from them. Now they will learn. For I am bound and determined to do what I must for me. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. How much longer can I hold on? As long as it takes. Of course if someone threatens my life and ends up killing me cause of whatever that I cant change. Yet I can make sure not to aggravigate or upset that person(s). They dont realize when I start my new life, I am leaving them behind. They want to be there, then you will do so on my terms for my health and happiness. Get over yourself and be happy. That is what I have done and now moving on.

10 replies

Chevy Vega
Chevy Vega 2014-06-20 11:54:17 -0500 Report

There are two types of family, for the most part; police officers, and people who couldn't care less about your problem. :)

funnygirl98 2014-06-20 09:41:02 -0500 Report

I know exactly how u feel. My family does the same to me and I have also learned to let go of mostly everyone who has made my life a living h!@##. I have made friends new and old that are more of a family to me than my biological family is. This is one of the major reasons I joined this community I need ppl who will support me for me and not what they can get out of it for themselves. I hope ur stress is much better now that u have learned to move on and living for urself. U should feel proud of ur accomplishments… WTG;-D

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2011-12-11 22:21:25 -0600 Report


I felt sad when I read your post. You have enough to deal with in life, and you deserve the support of your family. I hope that you are putting your health first and taking the best possible are of yourself. I suspect that you have already tried to talk to your family members and let them know how their behavior affects you. Have you? Sometimes it just takes time for them to finally get how they are affecting you, other times it is a losing battle, I know.

Just wanted to let you know that I am thinking about you.

Hang in there, and stay in touch.


TsalagiLenape 2011-12-17 07:02:36 -0600 Report

The family has been told I dont like repeating myself. Maybe if the worst case scenario happens they will see what they have done.Only thing is that I wont go there not for them or anyone. SO that ticks them off. Oh well get over yourself is my idea. Doing what I must til I get where I want to be.

annesmith 2011-12-12 00:43:46 -0600 Report

Hi…this is Anne. I have a question: I am extremely stressed by the modern day economy. I owe on my taxes from last year and this year—-I have never been late before. NOW, HOW does a person deal with the stress of what is going to come down on them for being late on taxes…I am embarassed, ashamed. I work 2 jobs—-STRESS is not the word for what I am feeling. My blood sugar fell too low this morning—when I am very stressed, I fall low about half the time, or I go seriously high the other half of the time. Sorry to sound negative…I am normally a positive thinking person, but I am beyond stressed about my taxes—I fell behind because between my 2 jobs, I am barely over poverty line—-good GOD…the forms—I lost 2 of them, I work 63 hours a week, then I had gone to another tax place that only did them partially right. I am so DARNED TIRED of this type of stress. I'm surprised I have not lost sleep over this…glad I have not. I honestly feel like my wages will be garnished, but I have gone over and over it in my mind…the won't just go in and garnish my wages all of a sudden..I will have all the forms, my payments, etc done by mid January , but, I have this BIG FEAR my boss will find out at work…I think she already knows…OH, boy…I keep having paranoid feelings, like someone is going to knock on my door and arrest me—-they won't do that—I already asked my tax man——he said that only happens if a person owes 10,000 or more in back taxes—I don't. I just can't stop THINKING about it——tomorrow I meet with my tax man in the evening. He's nice. I know you have been a great help to us on this site—-I'm just so darned nervous—who wouldn't be? I have worked out a newer financial plan so this never happens again, but they can still audit me..I think, in that case , I'll be receiving bad bad BAD letters from the IRS soon—-write me back if you have time—-sincerely, ANNE

TsalagiLenape 2011-12-17 07:04:02 -0600 Report

Well first go to H and R Block for your taxes to be done. Next make a budget to fix your late taxes on your house. It will work out. It may be tight but it will work out. Good Luck

Teresa Rose
Teresa Rose 2011-12-08 08:14:44 -0600 Report

When my husband & I first got married I was 16 & he was 18. We got married because I was pregnant.( We have been married for 35 yrs. now) anyway, when we first got married our families wanted to run our life. They thought because we were young that we were stupid. We could never make them happy no matter what. My husband couldn't find work in Indiana where we lived so he had a sister that lived in Texas. She & her husband helped my husband get a job at the refinery where his sister's husband worked. We moved to Borger Texas up in the PanHandle. Our famlies were so mad that we were moving to Texas. They called us & cussed us out. Even after all these years there are family members that don't like my husband to this day for taking me to Texas. We lived there through my pregnacy. 6 months. I was 3months when we moved there. After we were there a short time my husbands sister & husband thought they could run our life too. My husband was working with his brother in law and we had our own place. Again , family caused my husband to lose his job. My husband & I had to steal food to eat. It was really bad. My husband walked the streets everyday looking for a job. He bugged this hometown lumber Co. until they finally gave him a job. We saved enough money & got a car & then we went back to Indiana. I had the baby the day after we got back from Texas. A few years later after putting up with more family crap & even having them try to take our kids from us we moved to Victoria, Texas down by the gulf of Mexico. We lived there away from any family for many years. It was the best thing we ever did. Instead of our families being supportive they tore us down all the time. They all could have made our lifes so much better but all they could do was look down on us. We have been married 35yrs. now, have raised 4 children and now have 4 grandchildren and have learned from our family treating us bad to not ever treat our children like we were treated. We are always supportive and caring. We don't tear them down, we build them up…You are a strong person and you are going to do well in your life. Don't ever let family tear you down. You are better than that. Hold your head high and be proud of who you are. - Teresa Rose

pixsidust 2011-12-11 22:45:42 -0600 Report

When did you become a christian in the midst of all that? I am so glad your marriage lasted with so many odds against you! I am sorry you went through all that

TsalagiLenape 2011-12-08 22:25:02 -0600 Report

Wow I agree family should help not hinder or bear ill will towards family members. Yet as you see that I wont allow them to dictate to me nor will I let them influence me to something I wont do. Hugs Thank you for the kind words! You are totally awesome!

pixsidust 2011-12-11 22:41:43 -0600 Report

I know your ex thinks he knows it all. Who else the father in law too? You know you are in my heart.

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