I s*ck at being diabetic

By rickbond1973 Latest Reply 2011-12-15 16:56:43 -0600
Started 2011-12-01 09:25:50 -0600

Hi all…I'm starting to think I should make this discussion area my homepage and my first stop every day. I was diagnosed with type 2 this past … March? I'm 38, married, 2 boys (Connor is just over 4 and Brendan is almost 2). I'm a computer technician, non-active musician with no time for anything other than being a dad and homeowner.

I really don't recall what my numbers were when diagnosed…nor do I recall my a1c. I did pretty good (IMO) at first and went from mid 200's/low 400's to mid 100's/mid 200's in a relatively short time. However…I'm slacking hardcore. I was put on 1k Metformin 2x daily and told to shoot for…60g carbs per meal with 15g snacks in between. I was good at testing for a while…at this point…I test like once every few days…have had the same 4 Metformin pills in my bottle for a month…I really s*ck at this.

I'm reading some of the discussions here and some of them are encouraging, and others are scary as hell. About an hour ago I was ready to get up and go to Dunkin Donuts for a coffee (and yes, probably a donut). I noticed my head felt a little weird, so I tested and showed 428. I'm now down to 3 Metformins in the bottle. I really gotta get back on track with this. I have no desire to lose limbs, which are already numb and lacking feeling at times, but that's been going on longer than my diagnosis so I don't know how related it is.

It's tough going from eating whatever, whenever, how-much-ever for X number of years and then then BOOM, having to change it all. Seems overwhelming to try to figure out what foods do what to me.

Not sure I'm looking for input…advice…to be scared the hell out of some more…I don't know. Felt like posting. It's bothersome to me that I'm doing horribly at this, but I know I have to do something. I'm past due for blood labs with my doc…mostly because I know I've slacked so much that the labs will more than likely be horrible.

I don't know…if you made it this far…go you!! ;-) Thanks for reading. Guess I had to get this out somewhere. Now, sadly, I'm off to get my coffee and TRY to pass on the donut.

62 replies

watson4042 2011-12-12 14:24:49 -0600 Report

if you won't take care of yourself because it's the right thing to do; do it for your wife and 2 small children, they need their father and husband. but most of all you deserve it so take care of yourself. and come to this site and we'll give you ALL the support and encouragement you want.

nd3jmom 2011-12-10 20:15:03 -0600 Report

Hello… I'm new to the board and was scanning through the topics and yours caught my eye. I was diagnosed 11 years ago this month. Let me give you an idea what this disease can do to you.

I'm a 39 y.o. mom of three boys. My lack of care (on the part of incompetent doctors) in the beginning has earned me a one way ticket into the worse diabetes can do to you. In 11 years, I have gone from being a functioning working adult to a disabled medical mess. I have peripheral neuropathy in my feet, legs and hands. Severe neuropathy.. I use a cane to walk, because without it I fall and appear intoxicated. I used to type 60 w.p.m. and now use a pencil or hand pecking method to type. I used to have legible writing—not so much now. The physical stuff that has happened is bad but not as bad as the mental toll has taken on me with regards to my kids.

I have a 19 y.o., 12 y.o. and a 11 y.o. I can't participate in school functions (like walks for raising money, or classroom parties) because my body can't handle standing or sitting very long. I had to walk out of a school music performance of my son's because I was in too much pain to sit through it. I couldn't toss the football with my son, because I can no longer catch or throw the ball. Family vacations have to be to places that doesn't require me climbing stairs or walking long distances. How fair is that? I constantly feel like I burden my family because of my disability as a result of poor care first with the doctor and then me for giving up. I can no longer work, so the pressure for my husband to work long hours and in this economy keep his job upsets me because my only monetary support is a SSD check.

Currently my frustration lies in fighting with medical supply companies who won't ship my insulin pump supplies on time and medicare that won't pay the bills for what got me here in the first place because my test results aren't in their set guidelines. This is all stuff you don't want to deal with.

It's hard, I know. Watching carbs, popping pills, poking your fingers until they're so sore you don't want to do it anymore and in my case being attached to an unattractive pump is not the easiest thing to get used to. But it can and does get better. My diabetes is under control but it took a long time to get here. You can do it!!!

Young1s 2011-12-12 14:01:13 -0600 Report

So sorry for all that you are going through. Diabetes is really an unfair and unkind disease. Thank you for sharing your story and encouraging us all to do the right thing. Be blessed.

rickbond1973 2011-12-12 13:33:55 -0600 Report

Thank you very much for your response. Not to be taken the wrong way, but it is that kind of post that I intend will help kick my arse into gear in taking care of this. Thank you so much for sharing.

nd3jmom 2011-12-12 13:53:03 -0600 Report

I'm happy to share and I hope it does help you. It's no fun living this way, but if it will help someone to hear how this disease can eat you up and spit you out, then I'm more than happy to share!

troublemaker27 2011-12-09 15:49:57 -0600 Report

i don't like being diabetic can't eat the stuff i use to eat like candy,chips,pancakes and other things it makes me sick and dizzy

hillwalker 2011-12-08 19:01:14 -0600 Report

60 g carbs per meal check same here 15-30 grams snack once aday for me i skip it unless i do work out
exercise- do not use your wifes addiction to exercise as a guideline do any thing 15 min a day will help walking a half mile was where i started
take the kids (put em on a kid leash:))

nd3jmom 2011-12-10 20:16:48 -0600 Report

Or get a dog… We did and he forces me to walk for obvious reasons, lol. It helps me alot!

rickbond1973 2011-12-12 12:40:06 -0600 Report

I have 4 dogs actually, haha…though I also live in the sticks with 5 acres of land, so they pretty much run out the door and exercise (and relieve) themselves. I'd almost feel guilty trying to figure out which 1 (or 2) to take for the walk. lol

nd3jmom 2011-12-12 13:55:14 -0600 Report

I have two… but I have to take them separately because I walk with the cane. It's ok though… Twice the exercise!

Young1s 2011-12-12 12:47:22 -0600 Report

Just rotate days and/or times of the day. Or take them all at once. That would make for an exhilerating and interesting walk. Don't you think? ;)

Caroltoo 2011-12-10 20:24:40 -0600 Report

That does force you to get your exercise on a regular basis since the consequences of putting the dog off are very immediate

rickbond1973 2011-12-09 12:40:46 -0600 Report

I used to have part of that addiction myself, but I got out of it and then life got too busy to get back into it. The kids are a tough one…a kid leash would mean I go as fast as my almost 2 year old…which I don't really know how much that would benefit me. haha Not to mention their lack of concentra…OH LOOK A STICK!!! ;-)

hillwalker 2011-12-09 14:46:00 -0600 Report

so they get that from you——ummm donut——my friends used to joke i was channeling homer at times when the donut craving hit

Young1s 2011-12-09 12:47:52 -0600 Report

Hahahaha! Warning, it gets worse as they get older. Of course, mine are all teenagers now, so they could just be tuning me out. :)

shahe 2011-12-06 12:49:41 -0600 Report

Hi .. I just joined
accepting and trying to improve BS levels is the first step… it's doable
I have diabetes for 15 yrs now,I controlled with diet and excercise for 9 -10 yrs,now am on insulin
I would like to say that Yoga excercises and Breathing techniques help me
best excercise atleast for me is WALkING esp 30 min after food for 30 min ; dietwise portion control helps me indulge
Btw donut shoots up BS

Bugsy - 24241
Bugsy - 24241 2011-12-03 23:27:11 -0600 Report

Hi- this is my first time going through the site and it is amazing. So many people sharing. I really agree with you that this is the first place to go in the morning. I understand and relate to alot of what you are saying. Thank you for sharing and the honesty.

valentine lady
valentine lady 2011-12-03 20:25:58 -0600 Report

Dear Rickbond; I've read through some of the threads of your discussion and reread your opening discussion. Might I ask, how you doing on 180 carbs daily plus 45 more for snacks. That's a fair assestment wouldn't you say. The normal for most men are 125 carbs to maintain their weight, a day. So how are yours working for you? We each have our own body index. As for me to loose weight I keep mine at 75 to 100 carbs daily and I've lost 30#'s in 9 weeks. My nutritionist put me on that. Are you seeing an Endocrynologist or an Internal Medication Dr. Let me suggest an Endocrynologist for your team. And before I close, please stay away from doughnut houses. Their just to hard to risist one, why try and torture yourself. Remember, your son's are watching you and they both have a good chance of becoming diabetics too. One of my son's followed me, my other is pre-diabetic. What you do now may have a lasting affect on them and they sound pretty important to you. You vent anytime you choose here. That's what we're for, to support and listen and try to help. I just know how much help I was, not much I'm afraid, but my heart is in the right place. But please remember, STAY AWAY FROM DOUGHNUT HOUSES !!! ;-) Valentine Lady

rickbond1973 2011-12-04 06:31:14 -0600 Report

I am apparently going to have to go back through my notes from the dietician/educator as at this point I'm wondering if the 60g was correct. Honestly the only people I have seen thus far is my PCP, a dietician and a db educator. I need to have bloodworm done soon and will talk to my PCP about these other doctors then. Thank you for that info. As for the donut houses…I go for the coffee…when I'm weak is the problem. I usually try to go through the drive thru window because it's quick and I only need to convince myself NO DONUT while I'm ordering. If I go IN for the coffee… I stand in line, waiting, looking at the donuts…that's usually when I fail that test. Thanks so much for all the responses, as I certainly didn't expect such a response, if any.

Caroltoo 2011-12-04 08:29:41 -0600 Report

Rick: that is good planning. it enables you to better manage the temptations of the not healthy foods.

ccsp 2011-12-03 13:46:56 -0600 Report

I would suggest that you add a Naturopathic Doctor to your diabetes team. I take Metformin, like you, with a combination of natural supplements (from the ND). I also exercise (not as much as I want to) and making sure I include some weight training and cardio. Eat a handful of nuts at night to curb your appetite, at night, and help keep your blood sugars down in the morning. Seriously, add an ND that specializes in diabetes to your team.

rickbond1973 2011-12-03 16:34:38 -0600 Report

I know I really need to add some cardio…just rough to do with my life currently between work, commute, kids and my to do house list…

ccsp 2011-12-04 11:21:43 -0600 Report

Try doing some weights for about 20 minutes a day. Start light. Find a program on line. Turning fat into muscle is a BIG deal for us.

rickbond1973 2011-12-04 11:35:59 -0600 Report

My wife is a workout junky…we have quite a gym downstairs, so it's sad that I can't seem to find time to get down there…however with my youngest being almost two and oldest at 4…it's difficult to be able to get even on the treadmill for 30 minutes without having to tend to them. We have some selectable eight dumbbells down there…I have considered getting a set for upstairs…

Young1s 2011-12-06 14:13:53 -0600 Report

Or, you can dust off the old drumset and start whaling on that for a bit. When your wife and babies are out of the house of course. :)

MattyF 2011-12-02 09:35:23 -0600 Report

60 carbs per meal? 15 carbs for snacks? How does that work for you?

rickbond1973 2011-12-02 11:07:50 -0600 Report

Not really sure lately. Numbers were looking ok (better) for a while when I was at least TRYING to do the right thing…though I haven't been trying for a little while now. This morning I tested at 458, took a pill, last check was about 285…too much pasta lately too…

MattyF 2011-12-03 04:25:25 -0600 Report

I don't think I eat 60 carbs in an entire day. That's why I asked.

Caroltoo 2011-12-03 12:07:37 -0600 Report

One way is to learn to love the lower glycemic index fruit and vegetables that have many fewer carbs, but lots of fiber to keep you feeling full. Add a little protein and healthy fat, and you don't get as hungry as soon. It helps to stabilize some of the upward and downward swings that keep you feeling hunger every few hours. Regular exercise has some of the same effect w/r/t stabilization.

I'm with Matty and consider 60 carbs a high day for me.

rickbond1973 2011-12-03 16:32:57 -0600 Report

Is there a place online (silly question) I can go to familiarize myself with said fruits and veggies? Oh…did I mention my love of bagels? Lol tried the weight watchers due to lower carbs but it was like eating cardboard. When I was told t shoot for 60g carbs I figured that allowed me my morning bagel. ;-)

Caroltoo 2011-12-03 17:55:16 -0600 Report

There are a number of listings if you google "glycemic index". Another thought is to google "glycemic load" which gives you the index of a typical serving size … probably even more useful than the simple index. My copies are both in books I have, so no help there.

Young1s 2011-12-03 16:57:58 -0600 Report

You've found another food that I can't seem to give up. I used to have to settle for half a bagel, when I eat them, to cut down on the carbs. But then I found Thomas' makes Bagel Thins. It is basically the same as eating a half of a bagel, but because it looks like a whole one, my mind is able to fool my stomach. Uncanny but true.

blindbluesmama 2011-12-12 15:23:28 -0600 Report

Ok, I've beenr eading this discussion for a little bit now and i have to say, Riock, the first step is admitting you're mad, frustrated, whatever.. Too often we stuff our feelings down try to pretend they don't exist. The second step is to get unstuck. Now, I'm sorry but I have no idea how many carbs I eat in a day. But when I've been bad, my fasting is 150 or around there. This is just lately. Most of the time fasting is 130 or so. I keep forgetting my night dose of met forman and cinamon caps. I take two vitamins instead of one in thge morning. I also exercise two hours a day. Every day. I spent a bunch of money and did the one thing I know I would stick to, built a swim spa in my back yard and put a house around it. It's taken a few weeks to get to the point of doing two hours aday and admittedly I take massage breaks in between activities. For instance, I row a while then I have a rest then I do my jogging which I still have to go easy with because I hurt my foot a few weeks ago. I read this artical about planning exercise and it said I shouldn't let my sugar get below 100. I'm thinking, why? I thought the whole point was that you were supposed to get your sugar as normal as possible. So I'm like ok as long as I'm not feeling crappy I'm okay. I guess I should take a break sometimes. But IO heard on the news somewhere you're supposed to get a half hour of exeercise every day. So I figured if a half hour is good then two hours is better, especially since I still have to take it real easy on the jogging and walking. But seriously it's not like I play to be out there for two hours. It's just that by the time I get through with everything it ends up being about that. I just try to exercise every day because I'm afraid that if I take a break I won't want to go back. As for the eating right. I know there are lots of times when I can pass up temptation, but sometimes I can't and many times I eat stuff that it would probably be better for me not to eat. I just try to stick to two or three meals a day. But there are some days where I'm just hungry and there are days when I just go ahead and have what I want to have. The only thing I can say I totally cut out forever is regular soda. I guess I would say just start by making small changes. Just work on changing one habit at a time. I have to agree about the bagels. I tried the skinny ones and they were okay. But then I ended up losing my taste for them all together because they didn't have much flavor being all skinny. Now I eat the nature's own whole grain bread which only has 14 carbs per slice. It is better than the skinny bread which doesn't come in whole grain and doesn't have a lot of flavor. So start small. Don't throw out all the little treats all at once or you'lkl never stick to it. Just limit. I carried around some sugar free candy for a while in my purse so that when I got really tempted for a sweet I could just have one of those. If your fasting is 400 the first thing would be to start working on bring your fasting down which probably means that yes you will have to cut out some treats. Just remember Rome wasn't built in a day. If you stress when you do a no-no, it makes it that much harder because stress is kind of like a domino effect. You eat the bad thing… you freak out… you check your sugar and it's 1000… you freak out some more, then you hang your head and go well I messed up this much so I might as well just do it right and eat another piece of pie or whatever… have a few beers whatever. Now, when I eat a no-no, I go out and exercise a little while. And of course I try to stay away from the no-nos. It's really hard when you have kids and a husband who loves to eat. There's always doughnuts around and cookies and I get mad at him. I tell him that would be like me buying several kinds of liquor and telling him he couldn't drink it and leaving it in plain sight. He doesn't need to be eating this crap anyway. I'm sorry. Most of it tastes really good but his mom and brother is diabetic. But just try telling him that and all hell breaks loose. I just wish my dh would be more considerate of me. I keep telling him just go to the bakery and eat a doughnut or something. Don't bring a box of them in the house and then worry when I eat some. I haven't… yet… not today anyway. But if I got to hurting or stressed out about something I might just have one. Another trick I do is to remind myself of the stuff I did right. Like how this weekend I admitted I wanted a small oreo blast from chick filet but since I had a sandwich and waffle fries, I passed it up. Of course, I neglected to add that Sunday I saw a container of apple cookies and had me a couple. But I pass it up more than I give in and so it all works out somehow. You will be okay. Just work on it a little at a time. You're not gonna be perfect over night. You might want to try the lean cousine or the healthy choice dinners. Worthers original sugar free butter scotch candy is good and also the pecan delights. But don't eat too much or you'll get a case of the quick step. I'll leave you on that little humorous note.

blindbluesmama 2011-12-12 16:16:56 -0600 Report

Btw, funny you should say that. That's exactly what I told my dr when I saw him last and he asked me how my diabetes was going. I told him that I s*ck at being diabetic. He laughed at me. He thanked me for being honest. Then I got my swim spa finally up and running and have had a blast. I still s*ck just maybe not as bad. I still enjoy treats but now I eat more fruit because I'm not so scared as I was when I first got diagnosed. I figure fruit is better than doughnuts. Now that I can take met forman I don't have to work as hard. But of course, that's not saying I don't have to work. I still do, and I still work hard, but now I just worry a lot less. Then as I said I make small changes. When I go out, for instance, I don't get dessert any more. That was hard because for me, going out is a treat all by itself. There's a lot of good sugar free ice cream out there. Clondike is good and also the pecan delights from Rustle Stovers. The malls usually have candy places that make excellent sugar free candies. We also found a sugar free pecan pie at the bakery that only had 24 carbs a slic. I'm sure those who are better at eating good are going Oh my goodness that's a lot of carbs… but considering that a lot of the sugar free pies were 60 per slice… I was quite excited. It was very good also. I just thought of a line from a song called God bless the child. You can help yourself, but don't take too much. It's a good rule of thumb. Have *SOME* of what you want, but only some and not all. Maybe at first only have a treat once a week or something. Better still find other ways to reward yourself that don't involve food. Remember my first statement and take all I say with a grain of salt. I do s*ck at being diabetic. So I'm walkin this walk right along with you. We all are. When I used to do the lots of protein and few carbs, I found I liked smoked salmon and cheese. There are lots of good flavors of smoked salmon. Ok I'm really done now. Please let me know about your changes. Oh yeah, McDonalds has a really ood oatmeal thing with apples and rasins in it. It's probably not the best thing but it's better than the saucage biscuit and hashbrowns I would usually get. Sometimes you get in situations where you have to choose the lesser of two evils, and when that fails, jump in the pool and grab the row bars.

rickbond1973 2011-12-14 12:30:39 -0600 Report

Glad to see I'm not the only one that's weak for food. :-) Really though..thank you for adding that to this topic that I can't believe has grown so large. I did make little changes early on, some that I stuck with. Went from 2 slices of bread for lunch every day (turkey and cheese in-between of course) to the deli thins. Little less filling, but I think it's more mental really. Just switched to bagel thins, away from regular, full sized bagels (half'ish the carbs)…changed to greek yogurt just because I heard it was better for me…stuck with that, though that one is hard at times. The real change I need is exercise…going from none to some. Your post below about exercise…I used to cycle quite a bit and loved it. Unfortunately life got in the way and I've been away from it for 4/5 years now. Tried to get back into it a few years ago, pulling my son (only one at the time) behind my bike in a kid trailer, but had some head issues (not sure if related to D or not) that kept me from it. Really want to try again in the spring…

blindbluesmama 2011-12-14 13:07:41 -0600 Report

Ok, here's a reality check for you rick. Well, let me first say that there will probably be a time, two three months from now when it's really cold and I get off the exercise kick for a while and have to have someone give me a reality check. I am blind. So it isn't always easy to find exercise that I like! I can't stand treadmills though most blind people go well the treadmill is my best friend. I just want to cry when I see one of those things. Also I broke my leg while pregnant eight years ago. No nine this January. I went from no arthritis to traumatic whatever it's called arthritis in one day just like that, so that sometimes just going to the bathroom was painful. There were days where bed was the best place to be. I was told I need to exercise. But I couldn't because it was all tooooooo painful. Even walking killed me. That was only a few months ago. My attitude was sadly, kind of like, well who cares. Lots of people ought to exercise and don't. Well, then I got dumb diabetes. That was enough. I tried to walk. Walking was not getting it for several reasons. I didn't feel I could travel independently. Well I could have if I'd worked a little harder probably. My daughters sometimes wanted to and sometimes didn't. Then sometimes I didn't walk when they did. So I needed something I could do independently. So I purchased a swim spa. I decided that I wanted to exercise even when it was cold outside so it's enclosed. Yes, it's expensive. But the payoff has been worth it. I have only missed maybe six days since we opened it in October. A couple from just being sick and a few because of my foot and one or two because I figured I should probably have days where I don't exercise oince in a while. I've gone from 30 minutes to two hours give or take. I guess I'm just saying ok, maybe you can't purchase a swim spa. But keep trying and find something that works. For goodness sake. Go to the mall and walk while listening to carolers sing. Remember every little bit of movement counts. For a while before I got the spa and before the leg pain got real bad, I laid on the floor and did leg lifts and situps. Everyone is going to find something different that works for them. Oh yeah I'm a musician too. In a band called the horrible thing. We are working toward getting our first paying gig. It's hard with kids and school and all that. I play piano and sax and play at guitar and drums and would like to learn bass. I think I could do it.

rickbond1973 2011-12-15 15:27:05 -0600 Report

Good luck with the music thing. I miss it. Played hundreds of gigs on a regular basis between probably 2001/2002 until I quit my last band in 2006. No time at the moment with house, kids, work, commuting…I will say that gigging out was probably the best workout I got for those years. Lugging equipment in, out and the 4 hour gig in between. That's a good list for instruments. I've been drumming since I was about 14 (38 now), started picking up guitar (mostly acoustic) and started singing in my last band. I think a two man acoustic rock duo may be my next gig…with some treadmill and spinning action mixed in if I can. ;-)

blindbluesmama 2011-12-15 16:56:43 -0600 Report

I read someone's reply about a naturopathic doctor. I live in Arkansas. I don't think there is such a thing. It would be ni e since I take cinamon caps along with the mf. I was taking neem but ran out. So far exercise is really best. And woe to me if I miss a day as I did today. Didn't sleep well last night and have been in a fog all day and my sugar is high so missing a day, no matter what that expert said, is not a good idea. But come to think of it, I am feeling a little feverish. It's probably nothing but my eyes are all dried out and I feel tired and yucky.

rickbond1973 2011-12-05 07:22:56 -0600 Report

Day 1 of Market Basket Bagel Slims, Everything flavor. Half the carbs of the bagels I was eating. Not too bad…it'll work. Also already switched, some time ago, to Market Basket Deli Thins for my sandwiches…

SCLWKR 2011-12-12 14:45:12 -0600 Report

I love love love these bagel slims! The everything flavor is yummy! So tasty toasted with a bit of beanut butter all warm and melty for breakfast!! They make great sandwiches and are delicious with butter for a snack.

rickbond1973 2011-12-03 19:53:57 -0600 Report

Thanks for the glycemic info…and pcyoung…can't believe I didn't think of that…my wife uses those to make sandwiches…will have to take a peek. Thanks.

Caroltoo 2011-12-03 20:00:38 -0600 Report

Let me know if you have any trouble locating it and I'll dig around here and see if I can find my book for reference. I think the GI is in Dr. Whittaker's Reversing Diabetes (good book incidentally, in depth info on supplimentation, diet, and exercise—so much so that you really need to pick and choose what you use) and the GI Load is a book by that name.

Young1s 2011-12-02 11:33:44 -0600 Report

I am a big pasta person too. Don't think I'll ever be able to give it up, so I buy whole grain pastas. The brand I buy now is a wheat pasta and the total carbs is alot less than regular white pastas. So there is a way to have your pasta and eat it too, you just have to read the labels. Of course, this is true for all foods we want to eat.

rickbond1973 2011-12-02 12:00:07 -0600 Report

Yea…the D educator I met with showed me a box of Dreamfields pasta as a D friendly pasta…thanks to my wifes unrelenting, own sickness (which is, she works out like a maniac!!) we were already eating that. :-) I also, however, have a portions issue to resolve. Guess I can kinda' see how I ended up here…couple decades of pounding on my pancreas and it's not happy…

GabbyPA 2011-12-02 09:19:24 -0600 Report

The magic of coming here every day is that it makes me feel somehow accountable more. When I am not on the site, I am not doing well with my diabetes. Sad, but true. So you may have hit it right on the head. We all struggle with similar stuff and that is why it is so great here. We get it. We've been there and we usually can help you find your way out of the pit.

So here's your rope....visit every day. I think you will find it very helpful.

pixsidust 2011-12-02 09:26:58 -0600 Report

I felt that way with weight watchers because they would weigh us in. I had to get a loss so I was more careful. I guess the site is sort of like the Diabetes Watchers connect

GabbyPA 2011-12-02 09:35:25 -0600 Report

LOL, yep. It is funny how we won't do things for ourselves, but we will work hard to not be embarrassed or let others down. We really need to change that, but what ever works for now is good as long as it gets us going in the right direction.

Mickey/CCHT 2011-12-01 22:47:49 -0600 Report

I'm with you, I'm here ALL the time! It has been such a big help in dealing with D. Just doing what you did, posting this, helps get it out so you can look at it in a different light. It's one of the miraculous things here. That and the people!

I know how you feel somewhat. When I was diagnosed a little over a year ago, I was in total denial. I had just lost my mom, and I just couldn't deal. I took the meds the doc gave me, but she never told me to test or anything. So I just went about doing what I wanted to. Then my body gave me a wake up call! It put me in a positions of thinking, okay, what is it that I want? Do I want to continue on the path I was walking that would lead to (eventually) lost digits, limbs, eyesight and then death. Or did I want to fight this, start feeling better and be around for my daughter and the rest of my family. I decided that I was making changes, because I don't want to miss out on my nieces and nephews and my daughter.

With that said, it has not been easy. But I'm human so I am not perfect, but I will continue to fight. I am a warrior in this. I might lose a battle here and there, but I'm going to win this war! So that has been my mind set. When I stress and break down and drink a can of pop at work, I don't freak out. I just make sure to drink tons of water and try and figure out how to avoid that trigger in the future.

I have to say it has been an interesting couple of months, but have seen a marked improvement in how I feel. Not a 100%, but working on it! Plus since the whole lifestyle change I have lost 15lbs when I checked last(about a week ago).

So I pray you find that inner strength in yourself to fight and be an example to your children that they will be able to look up too, and be able to have their father in their lives. Was that a low blow? Well, you know what they say about war…!

I will pray for you. And know that we are all here for you, whether you need knowledge, support and or just to vent. It's all good.

God Bless you and your family, Mickey

blindbluesmama 2011-12-12 18:57:59 -0600 Report

I like your post and must say taht even though I haven't been on the sight lately I have been doing better all the time. But I find it's good to read things that help me realize that I'm not the only one who kind of s*cks at being diabetic but that we are all in the place of fighting for our lives. And we are all making changes in how we used to do things. I do that trick of drinking a lot of water too when I eat something I shouldn't. And I have lost weight as well but I think I am putting on muscle so it doesn't show on the scales, but since I've been exercising my legs don't hurt all the time and I'm not taking all that pain medicine. I actually had been doing hydro codone because it was strong and it was cutting through the pain and now I have gone back to tramidol. It's not as strong and I've only had to use it once.

Caroltoo 2011-12-12 19:07:21 -0600 Report

Sounds like progress. Pat yourself on the back for me. Seriously, it's great you can acknowledge your progress and celebrate it.

blindbluesmama 2011-12-14 11:36:46 -0600 Report

Exercise exercise exercise. Hate to exercise, find something that you love doing and get an mp3 player that you can put lots of music on. And I mean it about finding something that you love doing. It really makes all the difference. and I think everyone loves some sort of physical activity. For me, it's water aerobics. What kind of exercise do you love? Really think about this. I don't want to know what kinds of exercise you do because you feel you must, or what kinds of exercise your doctor perscribed. I want to know what you *love* to do. For me, water is the only thing that works. There are moments where certain exsercises are hard and I hate to do them, but I make Darrell take that cover off the pool every day so I can do my two hours. Yes, two hours, even though if anyone suggested two exhours on land I would moan and groan and find reasons not to do it.

rickbond1973 2011-12-01 13:06:08 -0600 Report

These replies are yet more of why I should probably make this site my first stop every day. Thanks for the replies…and I lucked out…work got too busy for me to leave for the coffee and death ring…

jayabee52 2011-12-02 10:39:51 -0600 Report

I do almost every day! And I've been coming here for 3 + years, and really love what goes on here with people and encoragements.

I highkly recommend doing the same.

(PS there's a freind request waiting for you. Please accept!)

Blessings to you and yours


Caroltoo 2011-12-01 13:43:10 -0600 Report

Good point, Rick and pc. DC really does help to keep us on track and more accountable to ourselves and others, but ultimately to ourselves for our own health. It's a good place to pop in for a reminder any time of day.

Young1s 2011-12-01 13:36:23 -0600 Report

This is my first, last and in between stops. Of course, I am unemployed (or a stay at home mom, in the sense that I am a mom that stays home) so I can get away with that kind of thing.

TsalagiLenape 2011-12-01 12:22:05 -0600 Report

Hey just like Lou said its a choice. Look at all the health reasons why you want to do this. Start it as part of your everyday regime like brushing your teeth. You are now in training of a new life. Do you want it better or worse? Your choice there. I want better for myself and anyone I know or care about. Hence tis a choice. Yet when I get my cycle as women do and stressed out beyond belief I suck at this worse than you. ok? Needless to say I lost 60 pounds kept it off for a few years and wham got diabetes. Now I am working on keeping track of myself what I am doing and what I need to implement more often than not. So that is your choice. Besides you want to raise your children and one day have grandchildren right? Do it for them! Hugs

Type1Lou 2011-12-01 12:12:26 -0600 Report

Dealing (or not) with our diabetes reminds me of that ad that said "Pay me now or pay me later". I was diagnosed at age 27 and am now 62. In the early years, I was pretty casual about my diet and control. I now have neuropathy and the beginnings of retinopathy. I realy started tightening my control 6 or 7 years ago after reading Dr Richard Bernstein's "Diabetes Solution". I'm hoping to keep blindness and kidney failure at bay by better controlling my diabetes and blood sugar levels but, no doubt about it, it is a constant struggle. One side effect of high, uncontrolled BG's in men is impotence. Only you can implement the changes you need. If you make the right choices, your quality of life will be better and you'll be around longer to see your sons grow up. Is that donut really worth the price you'll pay down the road?

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