Dating Diabetes

allison975
By allison975 Latest Reply 2011-12-11 01:13:49 -0600
Started 2011-11-11 00:10:25 -0600

So I recently met this guy who has type 1 diabetes. He's cute funny and just all around adorable. We like alot of the same things too! Today he told me he liked me and I obliviously like him too but the only thing holding me back is that we both have type 1 and I didn't know if that would make things weird or not. So I was just going to ask and see if there are any diabetic couples out there and if so what's it like to be in love and have the same disease?


40 replies

meter readers of void
meter readers of void 2011-12-11 01:13:49 -0600 Report

seems like you would have a better understanding toward each other than most, could be a wonderful building block to a beautiful temple , the gut feeling will let you know

connorthediabetic
connorthediabetic 2011-12-10 22:51:12 -0600 Report

i have been with my diabetic girlfriend for 3 years

jayabee52
jayabee52 2011-12-11 00:33:31 -0600 Report

Howdy Connor WELCOME to DiabeticConnect. Sorry you qualify for inclusion in our "little" family!

How is it working our between you two?

I married a lady with diabetes and she was very understanding of my medical challenges as she had a few of them herself.

My first wife just didn't understand and divorced me a few years after my Dx.
(but the fault wasn't entirely hers as I had a rough few years after Dx).

Blessings to you and yours

James

allison975
allison975 2011-11-15 14:55:48 -0600 Report

Thanks guys for your help and support! We have our first date this Friday! Wish me luck!!:)

allrosie1
allrosie1 2011-11-14 13:20:49 -0600 Report

Be happy that you have someone who completely understands where you are coming from and doesn't freak out when you have a hypoglycemic reaction. I think it would be a good thing to have a Diabetic partner. Could possibly help you both keep on track. You're young so don't put too much emphasis on it. You could be my age and single and it is not fun!!

roshy
roshy 2011-11-14 07:35:55 -0600 Report

i absolutly envey you and your new relationship with your type one friend!! i think there is every possiblity that the relationship will be based on understanding, acceptance and care!! i wish i had a type one boyfriend to share my hypos and hospital appointments with!!
I can see the potential in struggles though!!! what if he robs your last glucose sweet !! i can see the fights begin already!

Best of luck!! if things dont work out at least you both have a friendship with good understanding surrounding the condition!! that in itself is very meaningful and something to hold on to.

Mickey/CCHT
Mickey/CCHT 2011-11-12 20:52:17 -0600 Report

AHHHH, young love! With you being so young i can understand were you might feel it's weird. As a teenager you have so many things going on as you learn and grow into the adult you want to be, and having something like diabetes makes you different from your friends. Well, being different is just part of life and something we all deal with. I would think having a good friend in the same boat with you would be helpful in your situation as he would totally get were you are coming from when you are having a bad day, IF you really like him, this is just another connection you have with him. If anything I would think it would tighten that bond and you could support each other.
I wish you the best of luck with this. We are here if you need us! Just shout out! Blessings to you, Mickey

Old-n-Grey-n-Wiser
Old-n-Grey-n-Wiser 2011-11-12 14:24:58 -0600 Report

Allison, I see from your profile that you are just 13, so you have many years of dating ahead of you, so don't judge anyone any different than you want yourself judged, how would you feel if someone said they did not want to hang with you because are a diabetic.

Old-n-Grey

allison975
allison975 2011-11-12 15:07:05 -0600 Report

No I'm not saying that I'm not going to like him if he's diabetic we are already great friends I was just asking what it was like to date someone when you both have diabetes

Old-n-Grey-n-Wiser
Old-n-Grey-n-Wiser 2011-11-12 15:19:14 -0600 Report

is there a difference, like saying you both have the same colored hair

Tom

allison975
allison975 2011-11-12 16:01:16 -0600 Report

Well there's a huge difference between having the same hair color and having the same disease that you have forever

allison975
allison975 2011-11-13 00:28:03 -0600 Report

l didn't say that diabetes is the only disease in the world nor did i say that its a horrible disease I didn't say anything close to that I'm just saying having diabetes together is bigger than having the same hair color

jayabee52
jayabee52 2011-11-12 02:35:19 -0600 Report

Howdy Allison, WELCOME to Diabetic Connect!

My 2nd marriage was to a lady who had diabetes and many other "medical challenges". My first wife dumped me in part because of my diabetes. My "bride", Jem was very understanding about my diabetes and I about her needs, She was ideal for me. (we were both T2) Too bad the passed from this life too way early.

No I don't think it would make things wierd. In fact I believe it may bond you together on another level.

Diabetes is not like heart disease (which my Jem had and from which she probably died). If each of you takes care of yourselves you can live a long and healthy life with diabetes. Richard 157, is a member here and he is 77 (I think) and has had T1 for 60 + years, Just recently he has gotten his first diabetes complication.

Should you each take good care and control of your Diabetes, you can live long and compliction free lives.

Blessings to you and yours

James

Heather44118
Heather44118 2011-11-11 20:34:56 -0600 Report

im not happy that my husband and I are both diabetic but it sure makes things easier. and we help keep each other on track. but we also do not lecture each other if one of us lets say has a cookie then so be it. we don't say wow do you really think you need that cookie… we make meals together. I have a very strict diet because I have other health concers. so we work together to make food that is safe for me to eat and enjoyable for the family. hope this helps

allison975
allison975 2011-11-12 02:13:29 -0600 Report

So you don't like it you just deal?? I'm confused

Caroltoo
Caroltoo 2011-11-12 11:49:51 -0600 Report

Another piece of Heather's message is that when one of you makes a choice the other doesn't like (a cookie), that you can still be supportive because you understand the problem AND you can be accepting because you know the other person needs your support.

It's not carte blanche to go do what he/she wants, it's just that because we understand the desire for that cookie can be overwhelming and we all give in occasionally. Then we have to get back on track and move on with life.

Friendships and relationships are a lot of exciting things, but the bedrock of a successful one is being able to give unconditional support of each other, encouragement to do better, but not judgement of the occasional slip.

Type1Lou
Type1Lou 2011-11-12 09:43:59 -0600 Report

I think what Heather was saying is that no one is happy to have diabetes but given that they both have it, it makes it easier to deal with day-to-day living if your partner is dealing with the same issues you're dealing with.

Type1Lou
Type1Lou 2011-11-14 10:13:08 -0600 Report

I think Allison's youth and life experience contributed to her confusion. Lordy, I wouldn't want to be 13 again!…and I didn't have diabetes at that time. It took me well into my 20's and 30's to feel comfortable in my own skin…by then, I was diabetic. And you're right, we do deal with it. Best wishes to you and your family this Thanksgiving!
Hugs, Lou

allrosie1
allrosie1 2011-11-14 13:27:33 -0600 Report

Allison and All,
I had it at 13 and it was so very trying!! Some kids treat you like a freak and others are cool with it. It is so hard with all of the new hormones flying around AND diabetes. I think dating someone with diabetes would have helped at that age. Dating has always been hard for me but having the Diabetes in common would help. I'm 53 now and still doing both!!

MoeGig
MoeGig 2011-11-11 19:41:26 -0600 Report

Like anything else, the more you have in common, the better the odds of success. Now if your friend has a very different philosophy of "taking care of him/herself", then that could be a problem; but if both of you want to live a long and healthy life and both are determined to follow the rules, then it could be really great…and re-enforce the relationship..other things being equal. (I always have to ad that disclaimer..:>)

RebC
RebC 2011-11-11 16:23:45 -0600 Report

I think it would be wonderful to have someone who understands you so completely. When I was first diagnosed and I told my husband my BG was 548 (I was in tears at the time) he looked at me, a little confused (probably because I was in tears), and asked "So…Is that bad?" LOL

pixsidust
pixsidust 2011-11-11 15:19:59 -0600 Report

How great it is to have someone who won't be eating candy, cookies and junk you can not have right in front of you! I think its even better to have someone who is on the same menu plan as yourself. It will make life easier for you both!

Caroltoo
Caroltoo 2011-11-11 13:51:06 -0600 Report

Allison: you could be a lot of support for each other. It's good to have someone who has similar interests as a friend and sharing the experience of diabetis could enrich your friendship.

Type1Lou
Type1Lou 2011-11-11 13:30:30 -0600 Report

I would think that it would be a win-win for both of you since you each can appreciate the difficulties of living with diabetes and help each other with it. Where it might be cause for concern would be the increased risk to any offspring you might wish to have…but it might be too early in the relationship to consider that. I'm with Gabby that you should cultivate love when it crosses your path. My first marriage failed but it was before I became diabetic. I have a loving and supportive husband now and want to better manage my diabetes to enjoy my retirement and grow old with him.

Gabby
GabbyPA 2011-11-11 09:29:56 -0600 Report

My hubby is not diabetic, so I cannot answer your question from that point. But I tell you, there are times when I wish we shared that in common because I would not have to have the temptations of his junk food and we could have common goals. I guess my only fear with both being type 1 would be lows at night and if you both had them...maybe a service dog would be a good addition to the mix?

Love should know no bounds. My husband is in a wheelchair. I met him years after his accident. We can't always choose who we fall in love with. You just learn to adapt to the challenges and appreciate the strengths that are shared.

Caroltoo
Caroltoo 2011-11-11 11:27:29 -0600 Report

Gabby: how very, very true. If we are blessed to love and be loved, we take the wheelchairs and stresses that come with health issues. My spouse is now in a wheelchair, has Alzheimer's, cancer, heart and lung issues, but I've loved him for 35 years and won't stop now. Our lives are different because of these issues, but have also been enriched by us searching for the solutions to living well with these issues. Carol

VAlexys
VAlexys 2011-11-12 01:28:12 -0600 Report

I am too married to a Non-diabetic. And one of the biggest arguments we ever had was me trying to explain to him why when i shop, there are things that I buy strictly for myself. I am a type-1 diabetic who is on an insulin pump, so I can pretty much eat just about anything I want to with in reason. And for this reason, my husband still does not understand why I buy some foods seperately.

Caroltoo
Caroltoo 2011-11-12 02:30:19 -0600 Report

VAlexys: I am continually thankful for the sweet way in which Wayne has supported me through our 35 year relationship. Not to say we haven't had our misunderstandings and hurts, just that, in the end, we both want the best for each other and actively seek to encourage it's happening.

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