By Mimiewal Latest Reply 2012-03-08 10:24:44 -0600
Started 2011-10-09 15:08:39 -0500

Can somebody tell me why is it that people who are not diabetics presume to tell me how to be a diabetic…what i should eat how i should eat when i should eat…it is so frustrating…oooh!!!

Tags: diabetes

149 replies

GabbyPA 2012-03-02 17:17:03 -0600 Report

It is, and while I do agree to the frustration, usually (and I know it is not always) they are trying to help. They want to be involved. Perhaps what you can do is assign them something to help you with.

Like for me, pasta is my down fall...well, okay, I have several, but I will use this one. I talked to the family and for now we are taking it out of the house. I had some to use up, and the other day my hubby said "I thought we weren't eating pasta?". That is helpful to me. I explained we have one more box of spaghetti to go, and it is out. But it was good for him to say so.

So if you give your "clueless" people a job to focus on that will guide them, help you and make some peace maybe.

Gambling 2012-03-01 18:47:53 -0600 Report

So you know my aunt lol Once she found out I am diabetic she called and started telling me what to eat and when to eat how to cook it . I was just shocked

Mimiewal 2012-03-02 12:24:32 -0600 Report

@ gambling this is exactly y I. Made this posting my sister and your uaunt are one in the same. With my sister though she won't allow u room to explain anything to her. That's why I said oooohh. Lol

jayabee52 2012-03-02 00:05:37 -0600 Report

did she know what she was talkin 'bout or was she just plain ignorant?

lacat87 2012-03-04 18:12:28 -0600 Report

love the way you get to the point. my family thinks i can't eat anything.

jayabee52 2012-03-04 18:21:22 -0600 Report

thank you LAcat! Are they TEACHABLE at all or just plain stupid? Ignorant can be fixed to a certain degree, stupid can't! LoL!

lacat87 2012-03-05 13:35:35 -0600 Report

They are teachable, just keep asking the same question over and over! But what does that tell you about them?

jayabee52 2012-03-06 19:55:04 -0600 Report

OH come on! Jigsaw, with a little thought and imagination (I know you got those "in spades") you could come up with an equivallent term.

jigsaw 2012-03-06 22:11:06 -0600 Report

Where's Brooklyn? Just kidding, I guess I'm really not that pure, I was born there. My parents moved out of there when I was three years old ! Now jayabee, being born and raised on a farm, is gonna think I'm a city slicker! Actually, that would be impossible. I morphed into a good ole southern boy living in NC. So now you can take me at my word! Wanna buy some coconuts and bitter melons Cheap ?

jigsaw 2012-03-07 07:45:33 -0600 Report

Well James, whatever we are, there is one thing I know for sure…When it comes to DC where paddling up the same river, climbing the some of the same mountains and offering a supportive hand to each other and all members for that matter!

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2012-03-01 14:38:59 -0600 Report

Mimi I tell the food police to mind their business or arrest me. Shuts them up because they realize it isn't their business. I don't let people get on my nerves unless I am in a situation where I can't immediately comment. When I am alone with them I will tell them what they did and what will happen if they do it again. People do not like being humiliated in public and I will humiliate them publicly if they openly criticize when I know they have no idea what I can or cannot eat.

It is like our mother always told us. It is impolite to count how many pieces of candy someone gives you and to eat what is on your plate and not worry about what someone else has on their plate.

Type1Lou 2012-03-01 11:55:32 -0600 Report

One day while eating lunch with a group of friends, a non-diabetic friend commented "Isn't that a lot of Peanut Butter?" My lunch is usually an apple, sliced, and slathered with all natural PB…about 37 grams of carb for a mid-sized apple with 4 tbsps of PB. Rather than snap back that it was fewer carbs than her sandwich and chips, I just agreed with her that it might be more PB than she wanted but it was ok for me. She was well-meaning even though it could be construed as a bit annoying. I control what I put in my mouth and take responsibility for what I eat.

Anonymous 2012-03-01 08:04:28 -0600 Report

WOW! I finally sat down and read through these posts and found exactly what I thought I would. Yes, people who don't understand the disease can be annoying at times, however, deep down, they are just acting out of concern for their loved ones. Reading into these posts, it appears that THOSE are the ones that actually DO know that someone with Diabetes is NOT supposed to eat "cookies, sugar, agave nectar, honey, etc, etc, etc." Everyone gets so defensive when they're told that they're doing something wrong, when, in fact, they ARE doing something wrong! I have watched friends and neighbors get amputation after amputation of toes, knowing damn right well that the next thing is a below the knee amputation and they just keep right on eating CRAP! I've finally gotten to the point that if they don't care, why should I? But the next time someone chastizes you for eating something you shouldn't, maybe actuially considering that, HEY, I really shouldn't be eating that would do you better than to get bent out of shape at the person that points it out to you!

Just Joyce
Just Joyce 2012-03-01 14:28:24 -0600 Report

People have the right to eat whatever they want regardless if they are diabetic or not. They also have the responsibility to take care of themselves. I am not responsible for anyone but myself. If I know someone is diabetic and they sit down and eat half a cake, I don't care nor am I going to say anything. If they don't care that what they are eating isn't good for them, who am I to tell them?

I worked with a non meat eater who complained and criticized all of us for eating meat. At lunch she made ugly faces, stuck her finger down her throat or gagged. Everyone told her she was being rude. On a bad day for me I reached my breaking point and told her, one more gesture or comment about any of us eating meat, I will shove your plate down your throat and follow it up with this burger. She never said another word about eating meat.

Self appointed food police can drive you crazy. People who do this are ill-mannered. I don't need people telling me I can't eat this or that. The one thing I don't mind is my friends and family warning me if a food has nuts in it. They will tell me not to eat it because of the nuts or if the food was prepared with a nut based oil. I have a cousin who makes bbq meatballs and adds grape jelly. He will tell me if he has added it because he knows I am allergic to grapes.

I also am not going to encourage them to keep telling me I shouldn't eat this or that. If someone says I should not eat something because I am diabetic I will tell them when what goes into my mouth starts to cause a problem with your health and weight, let me know otherwise mind your business. If your BG is in good shape and you can have a cookie or a few chips enjoy them and tell the food police to butt out. I am not going to let them ruin my meal.

Set apart
Set apart 2012-03-02 06:03:15 -0600 Report

I see others sometimes usually not knowing what to say around mealtime to me, I did have an individual who once said to eat a can of peaches when I was low. She is a T2 and I know she has had several strokes, has retinopathy, and last week suffered from another stroke, now she has a pacemaker. What happened with her, was it lack of education, and no one taught her or her family? I don't know, but I feel bad, we know our bodies, I have learned so much here, I do worry as my calories and food intake are decreasing, I eat based in my BG readings. I am now at about 1000 calories a day, still eat some quinoa, breads, etc, but very little. My meals usually are now below 30g of carbs. People just don't know about D and sometimes I have found out in an annoying way they are trying to help!

dietcherry 2012-03-01 11:24:56 -0600 Report

I was diagnosed T1 at 13 and quit sucrose at 17. I am now 43 and have no complications of D. I also observe other healthy eating habits, but I know kicking sucrose to the curb all those years ago has certainly contributed to my success managing D. For me, it works :)

Type1Lou 2012-03-01 11:58:33 -0600 Report

Yes Renee! The responsibility for what we ingest lies entirely with us and we ultimately reap either the benefits or the consequences. Drastically cutting the carbs has helped me gain better control and stave off the worsening of complications.

hannelou 2012-03-03 18:30:02 -0600 Report

I can cut out most carbs …but I am hooked on thick brown bread …with or without seeds…It is my undoing , coz I eat it all the time …anyone else with same problem ?, and what is the best way to give it up ????? SO , SO difficult …

Type1Lou 2012-03-04 11:59:26 -0600 Report

Bread is one of my favorite foods. I especially liked the dark Russian rye with the little black seeds. I rarely eat bread anymore and when I do it is one THIN slice. I used to love to bake bread and pastries. I don't do that anymore except for special occasions. It's not easy giving up the foods you love but the better BG control was worth it in my opinion.

jayabee52 2012-03-03 18:35:25 -0600 Report

I had been hooked on breads of all kinds for quite some time. Last year I did an "experement" of cutting off ALL grain products. It was an experement so if I slipped up I didn't fail, the experement failed. I have maintained that experement now for a year with great results. Sometimes it is how we think about things which help us most.

dietcherry 2012-03-01 12:29:56 -0600 Report

Bless your sweet heart Lou! Im pulling for you!
I slowly weaned myself of wheat since discovering I am gluten-intolerant, so there is a big gaping carb-hole in my diet! lol
I picked up a box of quinoa and its still in my cabinet untouched 6 months later! I guess Im pretty much low-carb myself now but once I got away from carbs for awhile I acclimated and dont really miss them :)

Caroltoo 2012-03-01 13:41:11 -0600 Report

It took a while to get used to it, but that's where I am too. On the rare days when I do want more carbs, I have a couple comfort foods (mac and cheese and chicken fettuchini) that I've adapted so that there is enough protein to help manage my BG response and avoid the gluten.

dietcherry 2012-03-01 17:30:12 -0600 Report

Hello Carol! Now thats funny that youre the one who got me wanting to try the quinoa and now you dont eat it either?! lol I will make it at some point; Armourer has got me wanting to try it with scrambled eggs!! But jeez Met has killed my appetite! Its a real suppressant and I can see why people lose weight on it FAST! I added up how many calories I choked down yesterday and it came to 585-Yikes!

hannelou 2012-03-03 18:34:42 -0600 Report

Hi , dietcherry …what is MET ? which killed your appetite …are you talking about Metformin ? I take 2.000 daily and it does noyhing for me . xx

dietcherry 2012-03-04 11:21:37 -0600 Report

Yes! Although I am aT1 and must have insulin, more and more Drs. are putting their T1 patients on Metformin to overcome the insulin resistence some of us develop after years of D. I just have no appetite hannelou and this side effect hasnt abated after 5 weeks of being on 500 mg. once daily. This is not to say my appetite wont eventually return; Im giving it time to work and my system to adjust. :)

hannelou 2012-03-04 11:55:42 -0600 Report

I don't get it . I take 1000 mg twice daily and frankly it doesn't do anything for me …still put on weight , still crave for food , especially carbs (bread mostly ). I am insulin resistant and my consultant wants me on Victosa by the end of the month when I see the diabetic nurse .My blood HbA1c was 9.1% last wk …she wants to see it between 6 and 7 % at the very least…yesterday I decided to start a veggie raw diet , with the exception of steel-cut porridge and berries in the morning and raw fish every other day or 3 times weekly…so I shall follow URI ELKAIM I have spent a lot of time reading what he has to say and it makes a lot of sense . I am type 2 since about 34 yrs ago…have heart problems and gallstones + a handfull of other complaints and frankly I am eating myself to the grave even though I touch no sugar , haven't even got any for my visitors . BTW Uri is a holistic nutritionist …I'll be killing myself very soon anyway (due to all my problems related to diabetes- you want to see the state of my legs) so , I am trying what seems to make sense. I'll be grateful for any comments , especially if you have tried raw food . I know it is not very tasty …nor is 5 insulin injections per day , soon to be 6 when I start Victosa. xx

dietcherry 2012-03-04 13:18:01 -0600 Report

Oh and I just wanted to add: I know very little about Met but have read here time and again that it works as as an appetite suppressant for some; others, not so much.

dietcherry 2012-03-04 13:12:58 -0600 Report

Hannelou Im sorry that you struggle so with blood sugar control! I dont want to advocate prescription meds for anyone; sometimes they are a necessity tho. Try the Victoza and it may help you where the Met has not.

I know you already know this, but I just want to express my concern about the importance of getting your A1c down! You will feel so much better and it will help slow down or even reverse complications. Question: have you seen a dietician yet?

I havent tried a raw foods diet. My diet constantly evolves; Im forever adding things and eliminating other things. I believe there is always room for improvement and I am open to trying new things and/or theories in the interest of better health.

I currently, and for some time, have followed the Blood Type diet. According to this plan, I should eat more protein than most. Ive never been a big meat eater so there was a period of acclimation and I must use protein powder to get my recommended intake. Its not that I dont like the taste of meat, its psychological in nature, so making these changes has been challenging!

Please see a dietician if you havent already; take a good look at what you are eating and how much, and be honest with yourself! You know if you need to imporve on things and make baby steps in getting to where you need to be! I wish you much love and success :)

Caroltoo 2012-03-01 18:28:19 -0600 Report

Wow, that is a low calorie count!

Oh, I eat quinoa when I want some carbs in place of rice in a dish, but I don't use anywhere as much as I would have pre-D. I also use fewer potatoes in stews for the same reason. I'm just generally eating fewer carb.

I just had lunch on my favorite g-f Fettuccini Alfredo (Gluten Free Cafe) to which I added 4 ounces of cooked chicken, some steamed broccoli, and onions and red bell pepper cooked in EVOO. Then I split my 400 calorie dish which had probably grown to 600 in two and had a carb managable chicken fettuccini for lunch and a bowl for this evening or tomorrow.

My other comfort food is DeBoles g-f rice penne pasta to which I add a simple white sauce (1T oil — EVOO or coconut, 1T almond flour, and 1/2 cup organic 1% milk) just loaded with onions sauteed in EVOO and then grated cheddar or colby cheese. Makes a yummy gluten free mac and cheese.

I still use the g-f quinoa and rice spaghetti, and then cook my own vegetable and meat rich sauce.

dietcherry 2012-03-01 19:29:37 -0600 Report

Sounds like youre not eating many calories either but I remember you saying you wanted to lose weight. As active as I am, I need way more calories then what Im getting!!!

Caroltoo 2012-03-01 19:38:25 -0600 Report

You sure do! I probably get most of my calories through the meat and oil portions of my diet. My nutritional ID is a protein type, so I'm heavy into the meats. Had to teach myself to like fish, though I do enjoy seafood lots, but there aren't many calories there. I also use olive oil and avocado plentifully, along with walnuts and almond, so those add up. Do you like any of those things?

I think I'm in the 1200-1500 range and walk 3 miles a day, plus pushing Wayne around. He and the chair are 260 pounds, so that's quite a bit of upper body work out. I occasionally take him in the chair out for a jog with me. He loves to go over and feed the ducks.

dietcherry 2012-03-01 21:36:34 -0600 Report

Your blood type you mean? I mostly follow our O diet, now more than ever. I eat walnuts everyday, I like almonds, and I use olive and coconut oils. I refuse to stay on this no-calorie diet forever; I will either keel over or kick the Met! lol

Caroltoo 2012-03-02 00:33:05 -0600 Report

Nutritional type: in this case it was protein, carbohydrate, or mixed. The "protein" classification includes protein and fat as the major part of the diet with carbs at only about 16-20% of the calories.

dietcherry 2012-03-02 08:15:42 -0600 Report

What does that mean Carol "nutritional type" or nutritional ID. Not familiar with these expressions. Do they come from a diet of some sort?

Caroltoo 2012-03-03 06:04:11 -0600 Report

I started a discussion Friday which includes a link to the test which does the Nutritional - Typing. Essentially it is a typing based on how your body digests foods and which is better for you. Sounds like it tries to get to the same general information that the blood typing does. Why don't you try it and see if you see any similarities. It's been years since I've read the one on blood types and don't recall the details.

Young1s 2012-03-01 18:00:20 -0600 Report

Yikes is right!! That just a 1/3 of the daily recommendation for most women. I hope you get your appetite soon because that's not good at all.

dietcherry 2012-03-01 18:13:46 -0600 Report

Right?!! I feel good cuz Im eating good stuff but if this continues Im going to waste away!! My Endo is talking about increasing the Met too! I dont know if that will compound the problem or not! ?????

Young1s 2012-03-02 08:31:30 -0600 Report

Hard to tell. Is this your first increase or second? Because as with me, and from what I've heard from others, the doctor will increase the dosage after an initial adjustment period. When I was taking the Met, I was on 500mg 1x daily, then after about a week or so, was instructed to take it 2x a day. But as I said in your previous discussion I had the opposite effect (constipation) with the Met, didn't like that.

dietcherry 2012-03-02 08:37:37 -0600 Report

Morning! This will be the first increase if we choose to go that route, which my Endo wants to. Me not so sure. Since Im on insulin anyway I can just go back to a larger dose again and discontinue Met. We only started me on it to test his theory that I am insulin resistant. I know Ive told everyone all this already so just bear with me please! I need to get back with him and show him my numbers so he can make a decision. Ive been lax in doing that :(

Young1s 2012-03-02 09:37:24 -0600 Report

Of course the only way to know is to try. If it's still not working for you after a while, at least you can go back to the way you were doing things. But for how long is the problem and the question, right?

dietcherry 2012-03-02 14:05:20 -0600 Report

I am going ro ride it out a while longer and see if my appetite comes back; and I will accept an increase of Met if my Endo thinks I should. But heres the rub: is Met just killing my appetite to the extent that, because Im eating MUCH less, its only giving the illusion of sensitizing my cells to insulin??? I cant know until my appetite returns, if it even will. Sigh…

jigsaw 2012-03-01 18:38:35 -0600 Report

My appetite was somewhat suppressed when I first started on Met. After awhile, the loss of appetite subsided. Apparently, my body adjusted. It did take quite some time though.
Currently, I am 6' tall and I weigh 45 lbs ! Could this be some sort of denial ? (-; Explanation: could this mean the Met is still suppressing my appetite?

dietcherry 2012-03-01 19:28:07 -0600 Report

How much do you weigh? I think you typo-ed Al!
I refilled my prescription today so Ive been on 500 mg. Met for 30 days. First I had the stomach upset which appeared to go away after the first week (I think I had the stomach flu earlier this week when I complained of stomach distress). Now Im just not hungry! My Endo did cut my insulin dose in half too so of course thats going to play a role. I dont think about food at all and force myself to eat. I dont think I will be on Met much longer!

jigsaw 2012-03-03 17:42:41 -0600 Report

I am 6' and 200lbs of solid muscle…at least I was about 20 years ago! I'm still 6' foot though!!!

jayabee52 2012-03-03 18:12:55 -0600 Report

maybe not 6' anymore, Al, as your spine compresses a bit over the years, especially as one loses muscle tone. Not by much but it does a bit of compressing over the years.

jigsaw 2012-03-03 18:29:13 -0600 Report

Ok, ya got me! I'm really 5'11" as of the most recent measurement. One inch of reality has given me a yard of depression! Who do I turn to now? Eh! Maybe I'll just call myself the incredible shrinking man, and smile again!!!

Type1Lou 2012-03-04 17:48:56 -0600 Report

My husband claims his chest size is the same it was when he was 20 years old…it's just gotten lower. (he'll be 70 this year)

jigsaw 2012-03-04 19:04:59 -0600 Report

Personally, I don't think his chest is that much lower, I suspect he's wearing his pants much higher! Take a closer look and see for yourself.

jayabee52 2012-03-04 19:37:11 -0600 Report

as long as he doesn't get the "tire disease" —- that's when "de belly dunlop over de belt" SO BAD!

jigsaw 2012-03-02 05:25:40 -0600 Report

I didn't experience appetite suppression to that extent. Many people can't tolerate the side effects of Met. I did have my share of difficult times with it, but cutting the dose helped.
Hopefully, there is an alternative for you if the Met does't work out.

jigsaw 2012-03-02 08:33:32 -0600 Report

Actually, it was recommended to me by my RD and gastroenterologist for other reasons. A side benefit appeared to be better bg contol. That would be great if it helps you also.

Armourer 2012-03-01 12:43:59 -0600 Report

I'm not gluten-intolerant, just don't process it well (bread, pasta, etc.). I do fine without the carbs as in BG is controlled so much better. Quinoa is the only carb I intake, do well if I add it to my scrambled eggs or pepper salad, but turn it into powder for making pancakes and my BG spikes big time! Just use quinoa as one would rice. It has no taste on its own, but takes on the flavors it is cooked with.

dietcherry 2012-03-01 13:25:47 -0600 Report

Thank you sweets! That sounds delish and so its like tofu in absorbing the flavor of what its cooked with?

Mimiewal 2012-03-01 10:21:39 -0600 Report

I think u have the wrong idea here…this was about non diabetics opinions specifically my sister who thinks she knows more about my condition than I do! No defense here just continued annoiance!

jayabee52 2012-03-01 10:35:42 -0600 Report

Yet that sister loves you and is spouting their advice (even though it is ignorant) out of love and concern for you. Perhaps in situations like that the best course of action is to give that sister a hug and say "Thank you for your love and concern" and then send that sister here to DC to learn about diabetes (yes there are folks here who are here to learn about a loved-one's condition, and what they can/cannot eat). Ask her to come here and learn about diabetes WITH you!

Mimiewal 2012-03-01 10:40:19 -0600 Report

no not like that this particular one is just a know it all Wish. Love was a motivation but so not the case

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