Is that the only way to look at it? Watch out for all-or-nothing thinking.

Dr Gary
By Dr GaryCA Latest Reply 2015-10-07 21:43:53 -0500
Started 2011-09-18 16:37:00 -0500

If you are looking for a surefire way to beat up on yourself, I can’t recommend a better one than all-or-nothing thinking. The best way to define what that means is through a couple of examples:

“I knew I shouldn’t have eaten that dessert. I’m never going to get my diet on track. This is terrible. (And I may as well have another one since I’ve blown my diet.)”

“I thought he was going to call me to get together, but it looks like he’s not going to. Now my weekend is ruined.”

“I set a goal of getting exercise three times a week. The week is over and I haven’t exercised once. Now I feel awful. Why bother to try?”

“We always check in with each other at least twice a day. It’s perfect for me. In fact it’s the only thing that I can count on in my life.”

As you read through these examples of all-or-nothing thinking, did any words jump out at you? Here are a few hints: never, ruined, awful, perfect, always, and only. What these words have in common is that they don’t leave a lot of room for alternate ways of viewing a situation. Instead, they are ways of saying that a situation has to be one way or the other, all or nothing, one extreme or the other.

If you find yourself using words like these when things don’t go the way you expected them to, you may be caught up in all-or-nothing thinking.

All-or-nothing thinking means that your self-talk is focused on extremes. If it’s not this way, then it must be that way. If it doesn’t look like this, then it has to be that. It is self-talk that doesn’t allow for looking at a situation from different perspectives. It is focused on the black and white at each end of the spectrum but prevents you from seeing the shades of gray that might fall in between.

Now, if you are standing in the middle of the street and a car is coming toward you, all-or-nothing thinking is probably the best response. Don’t think twice – get out of the way. But in day-to-day life, all-or-nothing thinking pretty much works against you.

Think about it this way. Hand-in-hand with all-or-nothing thinking is telling yourself that you have to be perfect, the first time, and every time. That life has to be one way and can’t be any other way. And that other people need to be a certain way, too. That’s not a recipe for failure, but it’s a recipe to feel like you failed, and that others have, when in reality that’s not the case. Keep in mind that your perception can feel a whole like reality, even if it’s not. Who wants to live that way?

If you have found yourself caught up in all-or-nothing thinking, you probably already know the consequences. Feeling like a failure. Feeling hopeless. Turning a tiny setback into something much bigger. Feeling that other people are always going to disappoint you.

And then what? All-or-nothing thinking can lead to a defeatist attitude, and emotions like anxiety and depression. Feeling panic. Giving up on your self-care. Assuming you can’t make improvements. Stress that can negatively impact your health.

It’s only human to indulge in some all-or-nothing thinking from time to time. But it’s also possible to do something about it.

First, recognize when you are caught up in all-or-nothing thinking. Take a look at your self-talk. If you hear any of those all-or-nothing words – ruined, impossible, always, never – sound the alarm that you have wandered into the land of extremes.

Consider the shades of gray. Sure, it’s not what I wanted or expected. Or, it looks like what’s happening is just what I was afraid would happen. But take a step back and look at the situation through another lens. Ask yourself: What are other ways to look at this situation? One slip-up on your diet doesn’t have to mean that you are doomed to poor eating. Not receiving the phone call you had wanted doesn’t mean that you can’t find something else to do over the weekend. Missing a week of exercise doesn’t mean that you can’t exercise today. And deciding that something is perfect doesn’t meant that life could still be good if there was a variation in the routine.

In other words, ask yourself: What’s the middle ground here?

Argue with yourself. Once you move your attention to the shades of gray, have a little argument with yourself. Surround that all-or-nothing voice with alternate voices. Use some tough love, use a little humor, use lots of compassion. The idea here is to talk yourself out of the extreme and into a perspective that promotes your self-care and optimistic outlook. Don’t let that all-or-nothing voice off the hook!

Turn your self-talk around. Once you have spent some time focused on the gray area and come up with an alternate perspective, try some new self-talk. Here are some examples:

I can enjoy something that’s not perfect.

I can love someone for their good qualities and for what sometimes annoys me about them.

I can live with variations in routine even though I didn’t choose them.

I can fall off my (diet, exercise) horse but pick myself up, dust myself off, get back on that horse, and get going again.

If I make a mistake, that doesn’t mean I am a failure. The same goes for other people.

Overcoming your all-or-nothing thinking is a process. After all, it’s been hardwired into all of you through years and years of practice. But it’s possible to change it if you are willing to do some work while also being patient with yourself. So don’t get into an all-or-nothing mindset about your all-or-nothing thinking. Change requires retraining your mind to think differently so that you can look at things differently and, as a result, feel differently. Step by step, one day at a time.

Give up the extremes, choose a middle ground, and change the way you feel. Balance is everything!

78 replies

Ladykaye 2015-10-07 13:59:28 -0500 Report

I have just found this post and it is very timely for me. I was diagnosed with diabetes six months ago. I started on the medications, testing my blood sugar and trying to eat healthy and exercise. I also fell into a deep depression and lately have been having anxiety attacks. I felt to lost and helpless and so worried that I'd end up with the awful health issues that can happen to people with diabetes. I also have osteoarthritis and am desperately trying to lose weight so I can walk without pain. Sometimes I'm even afraid of eating at all. I try to watch my portions and my levels are good. In fact my latest A1C was 5.7 down from 6.6 when I was first diagnosed. Yet I still worry. Every little twinge or sensation I feel starts me to worrying about whether I am doing enough? I have read that diabetics should watch their carbs but I have to eat what the family eats. We are a family of five and we have a budget. I try to get enough fruits and veggies and keep my portions small and it does seem to be working. But after reading this post I realize that I am doing the best I can do. I have a hard time getting up in the morning but once I am up and about I do begin to feel better. Heck I've already done some housework today!!!

I also realize that stressing out over being diabetic is not good for me. There have been some major changes in my life in the past year and a half. I retired, quit smoking, and was diagnosed with diabetes and depression. And now I am searching for that balance and trying to just take it day by day, one step at a time.

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2015-10-07 21:43:53 -0500 Report

Hi Ladykaye,

Really nice to see you. And thanks for checking in here. I know it's hard to make all the lifestyle changes that diabetes requires, especially making diet changes. Especially hard when you have a family. But it sounds like you are taking good care of yourself and seeing the results of your labors in your A1C. Congratulations!

I understand the depression and anxiety you were feeling. Being diagnosed brings up a lot of emotions. I do hope you had lots of support during this time, and that you are still getting support. Being part of a community is a great way to feel supported, so I am so glad you are here!

Wow, you have made some major changes alright. Congratulations on quitting smoking. I know that wasn't easy. I suspect you are getting treatment for your depression. I hope so. You might also want to look into meeting with a counselor to give you some support in coping with all these changes in your life.

Great to hear from you. Take real good care of yourself and keep in touch with us. Don't go through this alone.


Kalisiin 2015-07-23 06:43:53 -0500 Report

Excellent post, as always, Dr. Gary!
I have an advantage with regards to this…one I am sure a few others have also had: I grew up in an alcoholic home, and so I spent YEARS in Alateen and Al-Anon. They teach you a lot of sideways thinking that you can use to deal with these feelings of failure, blaming yourself, and disappointment when you do not do what you think you ought…or others do not do/say what you think they should.

There's a lot to the Live and Let Live…One Day At A Time, and, of course, the Serenity Prayer. I am not a religious person myself, but one does not need to be religious to use the Serenity Prayer. One is taught in AlaTeen and Al-Anon to come to your own understanding about God…and for me, God is a personification of all our highest hopes, dreams and aspirations…which we humans seem so unable to achieve.

I came to learn that holding myself to that level at all times…was not reasonable…I am not God. I wouldn't even want to be. Because if there is one, then he has the larger view…and he can see us forever falling short of what he knows we are capable of. He must have the sadder view for this reason.
We, too, often know what we are capable of…and know we fall short…but that is the next lesson at AlaTeen…one of the hardest ones to learn: You have to learn to forgive YOURSELF! This is harder than it sounds.

This is not to say that I, or my fellow AlaTeen veterans do not struggle with this…certainly we do…but we have a really big toolbox. One of the best things you can do (and another thing learned in AlaTeen) is to have a buddy. One you can talk to…and can say ANYTHING to…and they will not judge you. You eventually must be willing to do the same for that person.

It's useful to have a buddy like this, because often, we are too close to a situation to be able to step back and see a different view. I hope all of this makes some sense..and helps people to fill their toolbox a little bit. Because we are all going to fall short from time to time, and others will disappoint us from time to time.

But living in today is a way to stay balanced. We used to talk all the time, in AlaTeen and Al-Anon…about people who lived with one foot in the future, the other in the past…and therefore spent all their time peeing all over today. Living in the past is a great way to do this. It is an easy trap to fall into. Likewise, living in the future has it's perils.

Remember, always, that tomorrow is another day, and another chance to "get it right" don't worry about the day just past…and don't worry about that tomorrow which is the fresh chance to get it right…tomorrow will come soon enough, and then it will be today…and THAT is the time to think about it!

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2015-07-25 11:40:25 -0500 Report

HI Kalislin,

Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts and wisdom here. I really appreciate hearing from you. And you said it so well.

I think that Al-Anon is just the most incredible organization. I often recommend that my clients get involved. And I am also a big believer in the Serenity Prayer, I say it often myself.

Forgiveness begins with forgiving ourselves, I totally agree. And I find that we often have the most trouble forgiving ourselves, and giving ourselves unconditional love. I am guilty of that myself.

I also agree on the importance of support. A busy who can listen without judging you, or telling you what to do. And yes, let's stay in the present. Life is now. It doesn't begin when we finally figure out the past, or get what we think we need to make ourselves happy. It's now.

Thank you so much. I really enjoyed reading your post. And I hope it gets lots of eyes.


MicNeil 2014-03-29 18:07:18 -0500 Report

A wonderful and timely post for me also. Am leaving a link on my desktop as a reminder. Thanks for taking the time to share this perspective.

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2014-03-30 21:21:53 -0500 Report

Hi! I am really glad to hear this was helpful to you. Thanks for letting me know. And stay in touch! Gary

GabbyPA 2013-10-08 19:32:20 -0500 Report

I am so flexible sometimes though I pass myself going...LOL. Sometimes I wish I was more all or nothing....I might get more done or stick to my goals better. But I do get your point. Beating ourselves up for not being perfect or expecting others to be is not healthy.

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2013-11-30 22:24:30 -0600 Report

Hi Gabby!

Very funny. I do the same thing sometimes, spread too thin to the point that I am at risk of spinning in place. Balance, setting priorities, setting limits, I am working on that, too. And yes, don't be too hard on yourself.

Hope all is well!


Starry20 2011-12-23 22:36:57 -0600 Report

I have planned that i would do 15 push ups (which isnt alot, but thats how many i can do the Right way..) and 100 sit ups at nite, everyday. And i did it for 3 days, but this morning i got busy wrapping presents and looking at what you said gave me hope, i will keep doin this!! I WILL!! haha… And my new years resolution is that im going to run a mile every weekend, when it isnt freezing tht is, to get into better shape… Wich i need to be, for basketball, volleyball and track

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2013-11-30 22:21:29 -0600 Report

Hey Starry,

Great to see you. And thanks for checking in here.

It's great to know this was helpful to you. Yes, take it one step at a time. Set realistic goals, and don't beat up on yourself when you veer off the path. That's how we succeed. And make it fun.


valentine lady
valentine lady 2011-11-18 14:00:54 -0600 Report

I loved your article. I learned a long time ago I lived in a black or white world. There was no room for gray in my life. After a lot of work, I changed that. I live in that gray world you spoke about and much happier for it. Just today at lunch I fell off my diet and had 3/4 cup of ice cream. It made me happy, everyone else was eating it and I just couldn't resist. Am I sorry for it…NO…I can make it up the rest of the day and tomorrow if that's what it takes. I think if we deprive ourselves to the point of I CAN'T STAND IT ANYMORE…then e really blow it. Being a diet or something in life. Thanks for such a wonderful post, I hope those that need it will learn from it. Valentine Lady P.S. I took a little with me as well.

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2013-11-30 22:18:21 -0600 Report

Hi valentine lady,

Thank you for your kind words. I am glad this was helpful to you!

I am all about shades of gray. And that means working with ourselves, and not against ourselves. Balance!

Glad you are here!


Judy(JP) 2011-09-28 08:41:41 -0500 Report

I love your post.. If only we could all think things through like this without beating ourselves up. I am attempting that with exercise. I have an issue with low blood sugar when I exercise (had this all my life even before Diabetes) and it tends to make me shy away from formal exercise -understandably. Going from 150 to 50 in 30 mins is not fun… So now my doctor and I have come up with a new plan. Exercise for 10 mins at a time more often. Sounds easy but still easy to blow off nonetheless. My new approach is right in line with your post. Good, Better, Best is my new way of looking at this. Good is 10 min of exercise (10 min is better than nothing) Better is two 10 min exercise sessions a day, Best is three 10 min exercise sessions a day. Of course if I was thinking all or nothing Best would be my only option (and I am that way!) so by breaking this down into categories I'm still getting the self praise but not a self defeating attitude. Now if I can just get over that Good is 'good enough' LOL

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2011-09-29 12:29:21 -0500 Report

Hi Judy!

Nice to meet you!

Yes, taking that step back and thinking things through -- and asking is there yet another way of looking at this? -- could certainly save us all from a lot of pain and frustration. It's just human nature to jump to the nearest extreme. But we can gently remind ourselves that we can still have something, even if it is not all that we think we need or want. And sometimes our eyes are too big for our stomachs anyway.

Your exercise plan is a great place to put that thinking to work. Make it helpful and fun, and not a way to be hard on yourself, or to talk yourself into completely letting yourself off the hook.

It was great to hear from you! I hope you are having a great day!


Caliafiosgram62 2011-09-27 17:54:04 -0500 Report

Murphy's law seems to follow me around all the time. No matter how much I plan to do something a certain way, it never ends up that way. You just have to be willing to change horses in mid-stream and ride.

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2011-09-27 18:24:01 -0500 Report

Brilliant! Absolutely. We always have to be flexible -- that is one of the keys to happiness. And sometimes those unexpected changes lead to new possibilities!

grandmaducky 2011-09-19 16:39:58 -0500 Report

i guess i do okay we had a rather trying day at work i was just laughting at all the stuff my co worker looked at me like i was nuts but i choose to go with the flow and not let all of it bother me and we did get it all fixed and done on time i just enjoyed it more than she did i am still laughting at it i would rather laught than let it get to me

Dixiemom 2011-09-24 14:05:49 -0500 Report


Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2011-09-25 18:18:03 -0500 Report

Humor is a great way to react to the events of life that could easily turn into frustrations or worse. Laugh and the anger and frustration can't find a way to take hold.

grandmaducky 2011-09-24 21:28:29 -0500 Report

i wonder if diabetes makes us off balance because i have fallen too my hubby just tells me i need to learn how to walk i am glad i didn't get hurt hope you were hurt either

jayabee52 2011-09-25 06:44:34 -0500 Report

I am what I call "balance challenged" too. But mine is from 3 ministrokes (TIAs) I had in 2005. The TIAs were probably diabetes related, but up until then (from 1995 to 2005 I really had no problems with balance. In fact as a CNA I had to have excellent balance to transfer patients from bed to wheelchair to easy chair. When my balance got bad, I dropped my first patient. I'd been doing it since 1993, and hadn't ever dropped a patient.

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2011-09-20 15:09:56 -0500 Report


Humor goes along way toward getting things into perspective. That is a great technique to use. The more stressed out your are, the less able your brain is function effectively. Keep you wit -- and your wits -- about you!


Jim Edwards
Jim Edwards 2011-09-19 15:37:24 -0500 Report

Wisdom with a laugh! Thanks! I will always think that you are the best, most of the time! You have shot a few arrows through my heart, so I know I am going to be dead forever or live and never die again. I argue with myself all the time. The good part is that I always win the argument and the bad part is that I always lose the argument. alright, enough. I have to go back and read it all again! Thanks, Jim

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2011-09-20 15:04:39 -0500 Report

Hi Jim,

This is great. Thanks a lot. I am glad that you are at least winning the argument part of the time. And on those times when you lose, at least nobody has to know but you.

I hoe the week is going well so far!


Pynetree 2011-09-19 09:54:19 -0500 Report

Dr.Gary, I've said this before…You are posting this for ME, at exactly the right time!.
The latest example is On 9/1 we learned that our 27 yr. old daughter…who moved back home last November, has been assigned to a position in another state, she has to report 9/26. And I immedietly said"there is NO WAY" ,"Not enough time","we can't possibly get everything ready", "How can they expect you to move your whole LIFE that far, that fast?" Every single thought on this great opportunity for her, in my mind, was an absolute "Never".
And my bloodsugar jumped a few points, my sleeping became erratic, and now after 2 weeks of this poor sleeping, eating, and poor control of my healthy life style..I am feeling the effects!
And it's affecting my Husband and Daughter too.
Working on Positive thinking now. I can do this…we can do this…it is a GOOD thing.

Thank you!

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2011-09-19 22:00:15 -0500 Report

Hi Pynetree,

Thank you. Glad to hear from you and also glad that this was helpful!

Congratulations to your daughter, but I can certainly understand how hard this is for you. Not only the stres of the move, but the lso having your daughter move. That is a lot all at once.

It's a good time for positive thinking. I will send some more posiie thoughts your way.

I hope you are taking good care of yourself! Keep us posted on how you are doing.


AuntieM234 2011-09-19 10:32:21 -0500 Report

I'm praying for a healthy resolution for you, friend. Take deep breaths, close your eyes and think good thoughts. Imagine how happy your daughter will be in her new place. Listen to yourself … It IS a good thing! Sending love and best wishes your way. ;-) Mara

MewElla 2011-09-19 09:16:21 -0500 Report

I like your post and I know for certain that my "self-talk" can either make me or break me…I just have to make the right choice…and this is an ongoing life process.

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2011-09-19 21:56:29 -0500 Report

Hi MewElla,

You are absolutely right. And believe me, it is a lifelong process. But worth the time and attention.

Hope you are doing well!


100 Acre Woods
100 Acre Woods 2011-09-18 21:20:47 -0500 Report

Thank you for the example! While I don't expect perfection in others. I appreciate you teaching me how I to understand the imperfections in myself.

Dixiemom 2011-09-24 14:12:41 -0500 Report

A quote from an old country & western song. "Oh Lord it's hard to be humble when you're perfect in every way. To know me is to love me, I keep getting better each day." Wish I coould remember the rest of it. Just a little more

Abby888 2011-09-18 18:16:47 -0500 Report

Thanks for your post. I am definitely guilty of "all-or-nothing" thinking. I try to tell myself that I don't have to be perfect but that's how I've always been. Thankfully I have family and friends that remind me that I am doing a good job with both my healthy eating and exercising.

Jim Edwards
Jim Edwards 2011-09-21 15:32:09 -0500 Report

I wish you would all be perfect like me. It would make things a lot simpler! I am either perfect all of the time or none of the time, it just depends.

Dixiemom 2011-09-24 14:15:31 -0500 Report

Now Jim, I should have quoted that song It's good to have a sense of humor. I'm so glad my kids all have one. At times, when we're all together, it does sound like we are a tad bit twisted.

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2011-09-18 20:08:18 -0500 Report

Hi Abby,

A lot of us have that all-or-nothing thinking ingrained in us, not to mention the need to be perfect. Glad to hear that you have a fan club that reminds you of how well you are doing, which it sounds like you are. That's great.

Thanks for checking in!


MrsCDogg 2011-09-18 17:42:18 -0500 Report

Great post! I have very few absolutes in my little world. I live in a world of shades of gray and not too many black and white things. All or nothing does not work for me, never has.

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2011-09-18 20:05:32 -0500 Report


I am striving to be the same way. I constantly remind myself of those shades of gray. It makes for a lot less drama.


TsalagiLenape 2011-09-18 17:15:51 -0500 Report

Very good post. Loved the way it expresses most people or those who may think like that. I know my family usually does! Hence sometimes I do so as well. Yet then I step back and reflect. Realize I cant do what they do. Only do what I can for myself. Yet love the way you have put it in here to stop. Rethink Retrain and Use the New info to help yourself. Great! Thank you

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2011-09-18 20:03:37 -0500 Report


I really appreciate this, thanks. Glad this was helpful. I think that we pick up a lot of our thinking from our families, this is learned behavior. But we can recognize what we are doing and decide to live our llives differently, begnning with changing our thinking!

Have a great week,


Samsons Mom
Samsons Mom 2011-09-19 18:41:29 -0500 Report

I just started on this site today. It was a great way to start because I have a real difficulty with this type of thinking with myself. I know this type of thing intellectually, but emotionally, I don't seem to go very easy on myself. It was great to read the posts and realize there's lots of others with the same issues and the desire to just take one day at a time! It really is one choice at a time, one thought, one desire and it's ok to be good to myself! I think I will enjoy this site.

Jim Edwards
Jim Edwards 2011-09-21 15:34:09 -0500 Report

Hello SM! Welcome to DC! I hope you enjoy it, contribute to it and learn from it. Now Dr. Gary doesn't usually or always give into such long epistles, but his words are usually, never, or always full of wisdom!

Samsons Mom
Samsons Mom 2011-09-21 19:01:27 -0500 Report

Jim, it sounds like Dr. Gary is a lot like all of us!!! And, I'm sure he appreciates your assessment of it :) or, not! or, maybe…

jayabee52 2011-09-19 19:25:04 -0500 Report

Howdy Samson's Mom! WELCOME to DC ! I have been on DC about 3 years and the reason for that is the people here are so postitve and nice, but will give you some tough love when it is needed. The information is also wonderful because most everyone here is walking the same walk with diabetes that I walk. Most of it is practical information that we can use

Praying that we'll see you around for quite a while.


Samsons Mom
Samsons Mom 2011-09-21 18:59:45 -0500 Report

Hi Jame and Jim, I appreciate the welcome! I think I will enjoy the site; it's fun to talk to people that are going through some of the same things I am…and some different things! Dr. Gary sounds like he cares a lot; that's really great! It's always nice to know people care about each other. There's not enough of that these days! I look forward to talking with all of you. Claudia

Samsons Mom
Samsons Mom 2011-09-19 20:10:07 -0500 Report

Thanks, James. I really am just now accepting the fact that I have diabetes. I've had it for 3 years and really haven't wanted to talk about it! I don't know why, but I felt like some kind of failure because I got it. I know…"stinkin' thinkin'! But, now I've accepted it and am much more free to discuss it and not keep it a "secret". I have been fortunate to keep my A1c at 6.4 and I'm hoping to really get serious about regular exercise. I think this site will be good for me and keep me more grounded where my diabetes is concerned. I can tend to be one of those people that thinks if I ignore something it will go away! But, as a nurse, I know that's not so with diabetes! Thanks for the welcome!

Dixiemom 2011-09-24 14:20:21 -0500 Report

Welcome Samson's Mom, I hope you enjoy your experience here on DC. As has been said before, we all share the same problem and it's good to be able to talk to someone with the same problem. Glad you joined our happy group.

Samsons Mom
Samsons Mom 2011-09-24 20:08:21 -0500 Report

Thanks Dixiemom! I'm going to have to get into the habit of checking this site like I do FB and my email. It is nice to talk to people that are in different phases of the same thing! When I read the different posts, I can relate to so many of them. It makes me feel like I'm in good company! Thanks for the greeting!

MEGriff1950 2011-09-18 17:08:25 -0500 Report

Stinking thinking…All or nothing. Wow Dr. Gary I really needed that post right now. Such a wonderful reminder that we do not have to be perfectionists, we are all too human. I am very hard on myself and it is true this sets me up for feeling defeated.I will stop now or my post will be just as long. Two thumbs up and many heartfelt thanks,
God bless,

lorene1212 2011-09-18 21:09:05 -0500 Report

Mary, I told you you are a wonderful friend and person. I will keep telling you that too! Our thoughts can lead to disaster for us at times and we all do this you are not alone. When you posted that post that was just another way for others to see who Mary is. Most all of them like you more now for it. Very proud of you very proud. Your doing great honey. Keep it up and keep moving girl cant believe the things that you are doing under your circumstances.

Love you sweetie.

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2011-09-18 20:01:30 -0500 Report

Hi Mary,

Stinking thinking is right. I am glad that this was helpful to you! Thanks for letting me know, and for your kind words!

I hope your week gets off to a good start!


jayabee52 2011-09-18 16:43:45 -0500 Report

I tend to sometimes get into that all or nothing thinking, But I USED to be a LOT worse. I've mellowed a bit over the years. Thanks for this very helpful post!

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2011-09-18 20:00:13 -0500 Report

You are welcome. You know, I was thinking the same thing about myself. As I have gotten older, I have learned not to get so riled up, basically. I wish I had been more like this when I was in my 20's. I guess that is why they say youth is wasted on the young!

Nice to hear from you. Take care!

jayabee52 2011-09-18 20:04:12 -0500 Report

to coin a phrase! LoL!

lorene1212 2011-09-18 21:11:00 -0500 Report

I love your phrases jayabee (Frank)!!!You have so many of them too!
Have a wonderful evening and sweet dreams.

Pynetree 2011-09-19 09:34:06 -0500 Report

Ha! I thought the "I love your phrases Jayabee (Frank)" meant that Jayabee's statements were frank…and I agree with that…James' Post are right on point, good research to back up his facts, any never strong-arms anyone with his opinions!