This is my first day here and I need help! In a nutshell, I'm a wreck and this will be the most honest I've ever been.
I've been a Type I diabetic since 1987 and have never been a very complaint patient.
In 2005 I had my first heart attack, complete with the placement of 2 stents.
In 2006 I had my second heart attack, a blood clot between the two stents.
In 2008 I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer and won
In 2010 I had a 3rd stent placed
Also, I've been battling my thyroid since I was 16 years old, along with a myriad of other things that tend to keep me on my toes…lol.
The dumbest thing of all is that I smoke and I'm overweight. I'm well aware that I'm an idiot and I do want/need to change, yet I lack the energy to do so.
I want to know if anyone else out there has ever hit rock bottom like I have and what did you do about it? I feel so very out of control and truly hate myself. I know I'm killing myself one day at a time, yet that doesn't seem to be enough to motivate me. I've been divorced for a year, so on one hand I really want to go out there and enjoy being single…on the other hand, I just don't care. It seems as if I've been fighting (health wise) for so long, and I just don't want to anymore.
Thoughts? Opinions? Advice?? All are welcome…let me have it. Thank you in advance for your replies. :)
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