husband newly diagnosed

october13
By october13 Latest Reply 2011-06-09 13:00:37 -0500
Started 2011-06-09 11:59:14 -0500

husband just diagnosed a moth ago. he was told he was pre diabetic 2+ years ago and did nothing about about. didnt exercise regularly, didnt eat right etc. his mother is even diabetic and was frequently reminding him to change to avoid. I am so angy that he let himself get to this point. We have 5 kids and it scares me to death that something will happen. It has made his cardiac labs thru the roof also. He is my best friend and I am supporting him/always will. I have changed cooking, given him space when needed..trying not to be the diabetic police! yet inside I am petrified, scared of the future, worried about things that could happen…anything that would not have us together for another 25 years as we always planned. I cry in my office at work so that i am calm at home. I can't share with my family members because he doesn't want to tell anyone except me/kids. He has never been able to finish anything he started. Right now I think he is enjoying the fodd tracking on Excel, making fun little spreadsheets etc, exercising with the guys from work, getting a nw monitor etc…but it won't last..he always goes back to old habits. He's lost and gained 50 lbs 3 times! Then what? I know this is his disease but iti is afamily problem. I know I need to stop whining and be thankful its not cancer or something worse. He is still with me and I want to keep it that way. But it is just sooo hard to be positive and not scared.


1 reply

jayabee52
jayabee52 2011-06-09 13:00:37 -0500 Report

Well, October13, the good news is that you CAN live a long and healthy life together even though he has diabetes ("DM"). The bad news is that hubby has to WANT to control it, because he is the only one who really can.

Perhaps you can sit him down and tell him how much you love him and how you want him around to be with you for a long time in the future. You might want to tell him how much his behaviors scare you.

Unfortunately often people (men and women) go into denial over DM and sometimes burn out and don't follow the best practices of self care. I did both (denial and burn out) and now suffer with painful, disabling and potentially deadly complications. Only at this late time in my life am I getting a real handle on controlling my DM.

If you could convince your hubby to spend some time with us here on DC it may be helpful to you both. I wish I had DC available to me when I was first Dx'd. I would hope that I would be smart enough to realize that I needed what is offered here: information, support, and caring by people who walk the walk of trying to control our DM daily.

My prayers are with you, your husband, and your family.

James

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