Emotional commitment to health

By vanrainey Latest Reply 2011-05-25 10:49:54 -0500
Started 2011-05-23 23:06:57 -0500

I was attending a class through Kaiser for those who are exploring bariatric surgery and part of that process was determining the level of commitment needed to take such a drastic step. To determine the level of commitment we were asked what are our core values and how does revealing those personal objectives in life impact the consideration of such a step.

The exercise surprised me in that It felt like I had forgotten or failed to fully recognize the fact that I had been ignoring much of what is important to me at a very deep level. The difficulties of the economy and trying to cope with unemployment had taken its toll in causing me to run on autopilot with regard to my health. The problem was that my autopilot was taking far off the course towards those things that I hold most dear. I had fallen into bad habits and excused the lapses both consciously and unconsciously. Consciously I could see how disrupted patterns of daily activities arising from the need to respond to the urgency of looking for work had compromised my ability to properly discipline my eating and exercise habits. Unconsciously, estrangement from my family and hiding out due to the effect on my pride and confidence had slowly eaten away at me until my poor health aligned with my poor self image.

In taking a renewed approach to my diabetes, I have found myself feeling more positive and enthusiastic about improving my health. Yet, until this morning I did not recognize how far I had strayed from the core values that have always guided me. My dilemma is that I have been hiding so long that I am uncertain how to find my way back to myself and my family. My wife and I talked about counseling tonight and that feels like it has some potential.

However, I am yearning for some connection with others that may help listen and possibly guide me in dealing with some of these emotional issues. I have never belonged to a chat or discussion group before, but in looking at some of the discussions, I am wondering if this might prove to be a means for that support. I don't know if there is a less public means for creating and maintaining such connections rather than holding a discussion like this one.

If someone could help me understand how I might reach out and gain some support in this area, I would greatly appreciate it.

4 replies

Graylin Bee
Graylin Bee 2011-05-25 10:49:54 -0500 Report

This last year or so while I was unemployed I found a great amount of unexpected help at the county workforce center. They offer workshops and one on one help. One of the greatest benefits was talking and listening to others searching for jobs. My self esteem was pretty low. Lost my job due to health crisis. Lost myself in losing my old home, old job, new health issues that wouldn't go away, new (old city - moved back to were I had grown up). Plus husband had lost his job and due to continuing problem from an incomplete spinal cord injury has had difficulty finding a full time permanent position. It is easy to find yourself in the vicous cycle of poor self image, poor healt, poor choices. But actually talking with people at the workforce center in similar boats helped.
The support here as helped as much. There is not the same face to face and eye to eye contact. There is still the heart to heart contact. Some people like the open discussions in this forum. Others use the messaging between friends feature that is available.
During the last year my husband and I have had the support of two freinds who are ministers and counselors. They were present at all 3 of my operations last year. Plus we have met with them unofficial a few times just for general sanity moments. Knowing they are a phone call, e-mail and face book chat away helped greatly.

Jeannie Holmes
Jeannie Holmes 2011-05-24 15:08:49 -0500 Report

Welcome to DC. This is a great site for support. I have been pretty close to where you are at. It's really hard to change the habits you have developed. I have been working on that this past year. It's a slow process!! Coming on this site and discussing things with everyone is the best thing you can do. You will get encourgment and love from everyone here. HUGS

cheetah1976 2011-05-24 13:42:41 -0500 Report

I did have the lap band done and it is an emotional rollar coaster with me. You can change everything over night. Try changing one habit at a time. One week try to drink more water , the next try taking a 20 minute walk, ect. If you need someone to talk to I would be glad to share my experience with daibeties, obesity, and surgery.

Te Ja
Te Ja 2011-05-24 13:26:27 -0500 Report

I really do not know if I can you any advise, but I would be more than happy to listen and be a friend as you find your way.