Diabetic , Homeless & Sucilal

Steam hammer
By Steam hammer Latest Reply 2011-05-23 02:40:22 -0500
Started 2011-05-20 10:27:42 -0500

I have been a diabetic for 6 yrs and my wife & I been living it a homeless shelter since the end of Nov. we found out on friday 13th that we have to leave the shelter and no place to go but the streets. Ever since then we have been looking for other shelters and can't find any that will take both of us.WE will be married 21 yrs in june and I can't under stand why she stays with me she deservies a lot better than me.Our lives has been really hard the whole time we've been married,I have attemped sucide one time ever since that friday I have had a lot of sucidal thoughts. help111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111

29 replies

tabby9146 2011-05-21 17:57:40 -0500 Report

so sorry for what you all are going through, so much good advice already, all I can add is that I am praying for you.

frustated 2011-05-21 14:55:42 -0500 Report

i know what you feel like i was once there. i had three children and abusive husband who when i had just had surgery threw us out and we went into a shelter. i turned to god and asked him what do you want from me? i was going to a community college but had to drop out cause of my health then a lady went to the shelter to do hair cuts and we got to talking. she had told me about some apartments that were based on 30 percent of your income. i said really how does that work she said i really dont know but i got the name and i went there and i applied they said there was a waiting list i said ok it will probably be 3-4 months i said ok what else was i doing then within a month they called me and said my apt was ready i had to turn the electric on so i went to some churches and they helped me with the money and then i started cleaning houses, selling cookie platters doing whatever in took for me to make a better life for my three daughters. thanks to god he showed me that i could and would survive and live the life i made it. now my oldest is married and has four wonderful girls. My second finished college and is married to a chef. and my youngest is graduating this week from high school and continuing college for radiaoligist.so see you can do it if you found a way to reach out to this community you can reach a little bit further to give your wife that beautiful life you say she deserves.

Dr Gary
Dr GaryCA 2011-05-21 11:31:58 -0500 Report


You have received some good advice and support from other members here on DC. I am so sorry to hear that you are going through this right now. I would emphasize with the shelter that you have no where else to go and ask them to help make a referral to you for some additional assistance. I don't know that they can just push you out if you don't have another alternative. I would recommend contacting your department of social services. And as Harlen suggested, you may want to consider reporting to your local ER.

I wish I knew what else to recommend for you. My thoughts are with you.


Harlen 2011-05-20 19:06:35 -0500 Report

Hello and welcome frend
If I was in your spot I would go to the ER and tell them you feel that your going to do yourself harm or may be to others and you need help
This will put you at the top of the lit after a short stey at the Hospital they will set you up with ins and a place to stey and you can get ssi to help with cash
How do I know this will work
My step son was having the same prob and thats what I had him do he is now all set with everything he deeds.
I hope things go wbetter for you

RAYT721 2011-05-20 16:26:07 -0500 Report

My parents disowned me and threw me out of the house on my 18th birthday… no home, no job, no money. It wasn't something that I did just as your situation is not something that YOU did. Things have ways of working out and I know you may have heard that time and time again, I can honestly tell you that it's true. I understand the emotional, physical and financial strains. They seem to come and hit us over and over again. Perhaps this is your time for getting out of the vicious cycle.

My advice besides contacting local churches and other shelters would be contact the United Way Services in your community. Do not be so proud as to not reach out to help yourself and your loving wife. From what you're saying your wife DOES deserve to have someone like you because you sound like a pretty resilient person and while you may feel down now, there can be changes from the challenges. However, you will have to reach out for help. Help cannot find you.

Please get yourself in for counseling to discuss the suicidal thoughts, depression, and an action plan to overcome the obstacles facing you. The United Way (and/or Suicide Hotline in your area) should be able to help.

We all have great purpose in life … don't give up before you find yours.

Boshred 2011-05-20 16:19:18 -0500 Report

Unfortunately a sad reflection on the US where people in desperate situations have 2 rely on charity! Herr in the Uk things are not perfect but at least we have the welfare state. I have been a type 1 diabetic since I was a child and I have always had the support of the NHS with no worries about health insurance, etc. Best of lick

GabbyPA 2011-05-20 15:30:39 -0500 Report

She stays with you because she loves you and sees an end to this only as you are together. I have been keeping you in my thoughts. It is always darkest before the dawn, I wish there was more I could do.

Jim Edwards
Jim Edwards 2011-05-20 14:29:13 -0500 Report

Hello Steam Hammer, I do not know what to say. I/we have never been rich, but homelessness has never knocked at our door. We provide different support to 3 older people, one that has no family left. She is 85. I have never worn the shoes you are wearing, and hope I never have to do so. Pursue every avenue that you can, churches, community groups, government. I know it is tiring and you feel already beat. I understand that many of the shelters will take only women. only men, or, if they do accept both, then you are separated anyway. I know that has to do with money and space. When you married, you married for the better and for the worse of times. Stay true to your wife in body, mind and spirit. You are in your late 40's with a long list of ailments, so, I know your struggles are on many fronts. There are things that you and your wife can do for yourselves. The first one is that, whenever you can, eat healthy. I have volunteered at shelters and I know many of the foods are carb laden. You need the meat, cheese and vegetables and do your best to stay away from potatoes, pasta, white rice and white bread. This will reduce your carb intake and help with your weight and energy levels. I found that eating less carbs and eating more protein helped my no only drop 20 pounds, but I have been able to reduce my depression medicine in half. I will keep you in my prayers, Jim

Graylin Bee
Graylin Bee 2011-05-20 13:40:00 -0500 Report

So very sorry you are facing this awful problem. Have been on the edge of homeless for over 16 months. My relatives have thankfully kept a roof over our heads. But it has been week to week for most of that time. In our county the food stamp agency, the division of unemployment and the workforce center tell us they can offer emergency assistance if we ever are homeless. I don't know what type of help they would provide. They have each given us lists of area resources for food banks, shelters, and other services.
Are there any agencies in your area that would help since you have been suicidal. That seems to fail into an emergency category. You mention you can't find a shelter that would take both of you, does that mean that at the very least for a short time you could both have a place at two different locations. That sounds better than both of you living on the street.

Steam hammer
Steam hammer 2011-05-20 13:54:48 -0500 Report

Thanks for the info but my wife is to scared to live on the streets less well us live ing sepertly for a while we have discussed it and it would be better for her if we stay together . I fell less of a man because I can't provide for her, I have filled for my disabilty and she have bn unemployed for 2 yrs

Graylin Bee
Graylin Bee 2011-05-20 13:59:24 -0500 Report

I understand, my mind just freezes up at the thought of being on the street. Everytime the room rent is due I have panic attacks. I have seen where some of the homeless people live in our area who aren't in a shelter.

oldbuttercup 2011-05-20 13:25:14 -0500 Report

There are many great suggestions below and I pray one of them will work.
Here are two more.
Write or visit a local politician.
Contact a local TV station.
May god Bless You and Your Family.

spitfirelady 2011-05-20 17:19:31 -0500 Report

TV station is a great suggestion! They will also possibly have connections. Also, Local Public Health office, the local hospital that has a social services department..

DJackwon 2011-05-20 13:04:07 -0500 Report

Have a couple of suggestions. I too am disabled and in 2007, lived in a homeless shelter in NH. If not collecting a retirement pension or disability I would continue to work with your lawyer, as long as there is enough medical documentation, your case should come up and with a lawyer as I had, I won, and recieved the back pay. If you are a Veteran, check with them they may have some suggestions.

I lived in the shelter with my family for 7 mos, then was able to get into a program called transitional housing. You should have a case worker at your shelter able to assist you in where to apply for low income housing or section 8, or even transitional housing. My family lived in transitional housing for 1 year, then we were able to gain modified income housing.

It does take some reseach, but most states have some type of transitional assistance, even if going to the city or township you live in, to get help with 1st last and a deposit on a place you can afford. I hope this is helpful, having been there I know how hard it is, but you can make it out of there and off of the roller coaster. Be persistant, and advocate for your wife and self. You have to ask questions, check out resources, and maybe even need to relocate.

I wish you well and hope you find a place to settle in soon. Let me know if I can answer or help with any other questions regarding this. Perhaps if I knew your location I could do some research for you.

- Debbie -

Steam hammer
Steam hammer 2011-05-20 13:36:53 -0500 Report

we are staying at Salvation Army emergency shelter and they don't provide a housing but they told us it will be services so it is left up to us to find a place to go. we have bn approved 4 section 8 housing but they told us it will 8 mths to a yr wait. i have look every where on the interinate for transitional housing but they don't have any for married couples. We have even look into Atlanta everything wants to charge us $ 20 a day for both of us and if we take public transportation it would cost us $ 80 a month for both of us.

Trudie Ann
Trudie Ann 2011-05-20 15:11:03 -0500 Report

Steam Hammer, maybe you could get a letter from your doctor and your lawyer so you could maybe get them to put you on the top of the section 8 list due to medical problems? I don't know if it would work or not but it is worth a try.

kittenpurr1 2011-05-20 15:25:13 -0500 Report

Good answer, Trudie. Also, Sect 8 is in other towns, too- maybe they could call and explain your situation, contact a Senator of the state that represents disability, he may be able to get you in contact with the right people. Send him an email, it should only take him about 3 days to answer you. Best wishes.

Steam hammer
Steam hammer 2011-05-20 11:14:59 -0500 Report

I'm disable to work and my wife has been unemployed for 2 yrs and can't find a job i have filed for disabilty and have a lawyer fighting it ,so another words we have no money comming into be honest with you we want to get out of this town.

sNerTs1 2011-05-20 10:57:50 -0500 Report

I am incredibly sorry for your situation and if I lived closer to you by a few states, I would open my doors to you and your wife until you got back on your feet.

I know that you are seeking every possible angle and I am not sure what Georgia has to offer for help there so please forgive me if some suggestions are ones that you have already attempted … have you tried talking to an area hospital and seeing if there is anyway they could coordinate some help for you, considering your medical problems, they might be able to help. Have you talked to your clergy to see if there is anything they can do to help you out. I know around here, these things are available, I am just praying there is something available for you too.

I hope and pray to God that you do not do the latter, because life is just too precious. I hope that you find something and it works out for the two of you.

All I have are my prayers for you.

Hugs and Peace ~ Cheryl

Steam hammer
Steam hammer 2011-05-20 13:25:30 -0500 Report

We stay at a Salvation Army emergency shelter and they don't provide any services like a case worker so it's left up to us to find a place to go.

Trudie Ann
Trudie Ann 2011-05-20 11:04:15 -0500 Report

That was a great comment Cheryl.
OK listen up everyone help us here. We need more ideas so please everyone send Steam hammer your prayers and any advice to help him.

Trudie Ann
Trudie Ann 2011-05-20 10:54:03 -0500 Report

I hope that someone can come up with some good advice for you and your wife. I can only suggest maybe a local church can help, or even the local news paper. I am sure someone smarter than me can give you the advice you need. You have to keep trying and never give up. Trust in God, I know there is an answer. I'm sending you my prayers, best wishes and my love Dear Friend.
Love and Blessings

kittenpurr1 2011-05-20 15:28:08 -0500 Report

Churches, senator, other places like United Way, someone to help you with the calls, or emails. Are you a Veteran? At times,that helps.

Trudie Ann
Trudie Ann 2011-05-20 15:33:25 -0500 Report

Thank you, you have also had some good ideas. I truly hope that one of the ideas offered here helps him and his wife. DC is filled with lots of careing people. I LOVE YOU ALL