I'm proud of myself... but not very happy about it.

By blindbluesmama Latest Reply 2011-05-21 00:55:19 -0500
Started 2011-05-19 20:32:58 -0500

I am really proud of myself because I survived McDonalds. We went there twice. Once to get my daughter a happy meal and the second time after graduation to get something for my other daughter. Well the first time I I was feeling kind of hungry so I really had to think about it and I decided to get a salad. I got their asian salad which had some kind of sauce on it but it wasn't drowning in it. So that's what I had. I didn't put any extra dressing on it or anything. The second time we went through the drive through. I've been really hurting and I was just thinking man I'd sure love a grilled chicken sandwich and small fries. But I didn't even get anything. I didn't even steal a fry or anything. So I'm proud of myself. But I'm bummed because everything just smelled so good. I know supposed to feel happy because I resisted temptation and was kind to my body. You can take the food out of the diabetic I guess but you can't make him like it. What would really suck is if the salad was terrible for me anyway and my sugar was really high and I'd be thinking well shoot, might as well have had what I wanted anyway. Quarter pounder with fries and a large sweet tea. But the important thing is that I didn't do any of that. I managed to eat yet another salad. And it wasn't bad. Had chicken in it and baby spinach and peppers and some kind of beans or something. And mandarine oranges. Anyway, so I have to ask, what do you guys do when you want to treat yourself? How often do you allow for a treat? And please please don't say sparingly or once in a while. What kinds of treats do you have? When do you allow yourself to have them in your plan? Do you wait for your sugar to get a certain level? Do you rely on your meter to tell you when you can have a treat or not? Do you just skip them all together? I have already told you about my strategy for treats. Small small small treats. My biggest weakness is chips. I don't control myself well with those.; Anyway, I am really glad that I can say all this stuff to you. Thanks for listening to my weird posts. I really am proud of my self-control, in spite of being a little bummed too. I think it's important to address all the feelings you have.

7 replies

blindbluesmama 2011-05-21 00:55:19 -0500 Report

I feel better today and my bs is doing the same thing it did the last time, like when I first started and it was really high for a while and then suddenly one night I took it and it was 125 or something. It's done the same thing tonight. It's been doing its typical thing of being higher than it should and then suddenly tonight it just clicked back to a normal range. When I checked it it was 123. I of course, thought my meter had read wrong checked it again and it was 153 or something. I sm not sure whether my meter erred or if blood sugar just tends to just be different each time you take it. Usually, relying on past experience, when the meter is giving an error, it's like 26 or 58 or something. It's a really big and really obvious error. Not a 30 point difference. Maybe it was because I stuck the same finger that already had blood on it. What concerns me is if it's giving me that much error is it doing that all the time? Am I going to have to start sticking myself twice each time and comparing results? Screw that. There are just some things I won't do. I am sorry for my bad attitude yesterday. Going to a fast food place and not eating fast food is something to be proud of and I really am happy that I overcame temptation. I mean the good thing is that it's not like it was the last burger on the plannet. There will be many opportunities later… when I've lost some weight and my a1c is lower, for instance, to have a burger or something if I want it. But every time I say no is like going to eventually lead to a yess. I think. I exercised a little today but that's my biggest problem. I physically *can't* do very much at all. Forget an hour, 30 minutes, even 15 minutes sometimes. My legs always seem to just hurt. They hurt more when I'm trying to exercise. Yeah, here I go complaining again. I know. Everyone's always telling me how exercise is supposed to improve your mood, make you less tired and less depressed and all that. All it does is make me feel bad and bad about myself cuz I can't do more, and cranky and in pain. Anyone else have that problem? Hey that's okay though. I have the perfect solution. I find a local pool and take a daily swim. Now in the summer this is easy because there's a pool right down the street. However, in the winter it will be hard. The Y closed and quite frankly the $45 a month that it costs for most memberships tor gyms, is too much to have to deal with the inconvenience of cabs. My solution to that is to get a swim spa. They are expensive but it makes more sense. I will put it in its own separate building so that I can use it in the winter too. I am currently pricing spas and buildings. Sams club has a swim spa but I am not crazy about their buildings. Well they are more like those dome tent things. Anyone else have a swim spa and want to share their experiences?

Harlen 2011-05-20 19:36:29 -0500 Report

I cant eat any of the ?food? they have there
rather just have the cake with the same carbs lol lol
Keep up the great work
Best wishes

granniesophie 2011-05-19 20:44:00 -0500 Report

Ok, so sue me, once in a while I have a quarter pounder and fries! And it doesn't kill my sugar! Yeah, it goes up some, and it's higher in the morning, like 153, but then I get right back on the wagon and move on. My numbers are usually pretty darn good, so I cheat. Not often mind you, but enough so I don't feel totally deprived :)
Actually, I've never seen a 300 reading-the highest was a 274, and that was when I was on steriods for my neck. Didn't work, but boy was my house clean! I was like a hummingbird!
Anyway, I digress-don't beat yourself up if you fall off, just get back up and begin again the next day. Treats are fun, as with everything else, in moderation!

blindbluesmama 2011-05-20 06:53:47 -0500 Report

If my numbers were like yours, I'd probably not ask that question. But mine are much higher and things like stress or totm or whatever tend to make it go up. Right now I am doing good if I have a day where my sugar doesn't go above 200 but most days fasting is in the high hundreds, so you can imagine that days like the other day where I had those chips and wasn't very discressionary about them, my blood sugar went boyng.I just keep telling myself when my numbers are *consistantly down, I can maybe have a treat once in a while. But they aren't consistent. I think the antibiotics still aren't really working. My other challenge is to find some kind of exercise that counts as physical activity and doesn't require me to walk or ride a bike or basically do anything that hurts my poor old knees. It's not that I want to be a couch potato. Quite the contrary. I want to find some exercise that I can do when the pain gets really bad so I don't use that as an excuse.

edvel54 2011-05-19 20:39:16 -0500 Report

If you think McDonald's or any restaurant smells good…work at one for a while.

blindbluesmama 2011-05-20 07:11:44 -0500 Report

Hey I hear ya. I don't think they'd hire a blind person. I am feeling better today much less annoyed and much more glad I didn't do anything too bad aside from having a snack last night. But I still controled my portions. We shall see if my fb is ok. Yesterday it was 162. It's coming down, albeit slowly. I have faith that resisting temptation paid off. And if for whatever reason it didn't, well sometimes you get into a contest but don't win. No reason not to keep trying. My fb is 174 this morning. So knowing what I know, that it's going to spike like crazy, I will have to really choose carbs carefully. Fruit or toast instead of fruit *and* toast.

jayabee52 2011-05-20 19:29:56 -0500 Report

My fasting BG was 103 this morning and breakfast was a hard boiled egg, and a metamucil fiber drink. No toast, no fruit. I have been trying to control my BG#s with no insulin, and have done so pretty well for the past couple weeks.

Resisting temptation does pay off Michelle. Perhaps once you get your BG#s down to the normal range, then you might want to consider giving yourself a treat.

Because I have not had to "shoot" myself in the tummy I also have the benefit of the weight coming off. That is motivating to me now!

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