I've been diabetic since I was 13 and am turning 23 this year. I am finally coming to terms with diabetes after almost a decade, but I hope it's not to late. I can honestly admit I've never taken care of myself, completely omitting blood tests and shots all together and only really paying attention to my health for short periods of time. My history includes more DKA hospitalizations than I can count on one hand and a ferocious will to not care. I went to the eye doctor last month and he pointed out a spot hemorrhage which he said will go away with good care and should not worry, but for the first time ever I am am faced, no matter how small, the first real evident long term complication of poor control. Blood tests confirm I have no liver or kidney damage yet, which is a huge relief. That eye appointment really got me thinking and since then I have been, for the first time, been making an honest effort to do good. I use a DEXCOM glucose monitor so I can see the trends of my sugars around the clock and be alerted when I come out of range. I am finding it hard to find a balance which I am embarrassed to say since I've had almost half my life to figure this all out. I know so much about diabetes, but I've just been stubborn. I am finally confronting all of these fears for the first time on top of concerns for my health I've never felt. I am hoping it's not to late to turn it around, that I haven't permanently damaged my body in my prolonged ignorance, and that I can finally take this seriously because I can no longer deny that diabetes will harm me if I ignore it any longer. How do you guys do this, so religiously? Are you fearful?
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