tarnished halo?

By blindbluesmama Latest Reply 2011-03-28 10:14:50 -0500
Started 2011-03-22 09:55:22 -0500

Yesterday I didn't just get my halo dirty. I dipped it in red fruit punch and then let it dry. No, I did not drink red fruit punch. I spent five hours in the dentist chair and then went to chick filet and had a number 1 which is a fried chicken sandwich and waffle fries. I did have a diet doctor pepper. But of course, I had the angel on my shoulder going no don't do that, but they didn't make the chicken raps any more so I just decided to go with what I know. It was a terrible choice, as my blood sugar went up really really high. It was nearly 300. But the good news and the breakthrough is that I am mastering the art of getting back on the horse again. Ok, I fell and none too gracefully this time. But the rest of the night I had a low carb yogourt some fruit and cheese with four crackers… and my bedtime blood sugar was 127 I think. This morning it was 123. And then this morning at breakfast, I had two pieces of toast with butter on them and some yogourt. I was also going to have a peach but it's like my body is starting to sense when I've had enough carbs and go you know what, it might be a good idea to put back the peach for now. So next time… I'll just eat one slice of that yummy toast and then I can still have the peach which is good for me. I don't really have a good way to count carbs and I wouldn't anyway as it's just too much fuss and bother. I want this to be a lifestyle change, but I can see how stuff effects me after I eat it and it's like my body is doing its own counting. Where was that feature when I was dipping my halo in red fruit punch yesterday? Well I had woken up at three in the morning with leg pain, had a pain pill around six cuz I just couldn't deal with it, then they gassed nme up pretty good because they were worried about my blood pressure. So by that time I was just like, ok grrr. I'm tired and frustrated and I've had a head ache. There are times when you just need a little break. And even though we were at the mall I didn't get the cinamon covered almonds or cookies or dippin dots or anything like that. Of course, what I did get was bad enough. But having my trusty meter and being able to check my sugar is like having the cricket on my shoulder all the time. I see it go up and think well that was a bad choice now wasn't it… then I make adjustments. So my fbs is within safe levels, except for yesterday when it was 45. I'm still not convinced that was an accurate reading. I had no symptoms. I feel moer symptomatic now after I ate than I did yesterday morning. I am running a fever though. That's probably why. I would really like to know about other people's tarnished halo experiences. Not so much, oh poor me I made a horrible choice… although I know we all feel that way at times. More to the point, what you did later to recover. What choices did you make afterword? How did you deal with your guilt if you felt any? Did your kids or partner get involved, like did they yell at you for making a bad decision? How did you handle that? Mine fortunately were very ok with me. I could, in fact, take lessons from how they handled things. Ok, happy posting.

69 replies

Flustrated 2011-03-28 10:10:10 -0500 Report

I didn't mean to do this, (excuse,I know better) I thought I could have 3 eggo pancakes and increase humalog and everything would be o.k. Well no! I wound up with over 200 glucose reading and will have to walk dog to bring it down bef lunch. Yesterday I had 2 pancakes with 4 units of humalog and one hour later everything was o.k. I have to shape up. I put the stuff in me. Had a cup of homemade chili last night for supper and got up one o'clock in the morning with 70 blood sugar. I got panicky because I thought it would drop more during the night. I'm glad I am seeing a diabetic educator and will have a few questions for her. I don't want another shot that might cause be to drop lower. I get panicky at 70. Good luck to you.

Pynetree 2011-03-26 10:02:46 -0500 Report

Alas, my halo only held on with duct tape and wire. Only exercise I get is bending to retrieve it. Yesterday, after a reasonably healthy breakfast and lunch..My husband was getting a few JoJo's (Faux Oreo's from TraderJoes) for himself, dropped the box, cookies all over the floor…I raced the dog to get and eat 3 cookies…off the floor! I don't even eat them, clean, out of the box…and I popped 3 cookies in my mouth in mili-seconds! OMG! I'm telling myself that I saved the puppy from chocolate cookies, that might make him sick. That food dropped and picked up fast is clean enough to eat…you know, the 5 second rule. Also, the swift movement and bending were beneficial…EXERCISE! And that calories fell off as cookies rolled across floor…(in my direction, I might add!)
Only downside to this was finding out they are REALY good! As good, maybe even better than Oreos! So now I have to work them into my daily carb/sugar count…or figure out how to get hubby to drop them a lot…hhuum!

blindbluesmama 2011-03-26 10:22:41 -0500 Report

Thank you pinetree. Maybe I won't go to hell if I have a slice of pizza with Kaeli. but I still don't actually count. It gives me a head ache. I guestimate. Like, if I have a slice of pizza and a sugar free cup cake, I probably will eat like just a chicken breast and some begetables or something at dinner. I won't have a balanced day, no dairy or whatever, but I'm still trying to keep the halo firmly affixed to my head, or maybe firmly ascu, while remembering that even though I might have consumed too many carbs this week, the good outweighed the bad and I still managed to lose weight, and it's not the weekly or daily bs that counts, it's the bs over time, and my fbs is down and when I'm nice to my blood sugar then I don't get so many symptoms. So overall, the halo has some dirt on it, but it serviceable I think. The horse on the other hand, bucks too much and throws me to the ground. It's the horse's fault!!!! I'm going to shoot that horse. Well gotta do a ppbs to make sure that I chose wisely this morning. I'm a little late, but I don't think 20 minutes should make difference one way or the other.

Pynetree 2011-03-26 11:17:02 -0500 Report

Guestimating is the way I count too. LOL! Just aiming for more good days than bad. Need the scale to keep moving lower, and the glucometor to stay fairly steady! Love and Luck!

blindbluesmama 2011-03-26 12:51:34 -0500 Report

Oh I guess it wasn't a typo. Read more carefully and found it to be a weird pronunciation thing with my screenb reader. Today I had a chicken filet, one of those ones from the freezer that's grilled and cooked. Only three grams of carbs and some cucumbers with salt on them.

Jim Edwards
Jim Edwards 2011-03-23 11:24:50 -0500 Report

What is this about falling and stumbling? I find as long as I am sitting on the ground, eating a milk choclate bar (Hershey's, of course) and dipping it into ice cream, I never fall or stumble! Really, I am improving as time goes on. Well, I am improving on my eating habits, but my A1C does not seem to respond as quick as I would like. I will confess, I am addicted to chocolate, but I can take a Hershey bar and I am almost to the point of only 1 square a day. So I get 8 servings out of the one bar. I always thought they scored them like that in case you had to share! LOL! I know my weight issue, about 100 pounds too many, is primarily from too many carbs. I love bread. For April, my birthday month, I am committed to a no "white" carbs, as much as possible. No white rice, no pizza :(, no subs, unless from Subway and then only a 6", no chips (no problem), no pretzels (I come from Philly originally, this is a problem), I have already 98% eliminated any stops at fast food joints. Let's see, what are my other carb sins?
Well, cereal, but everything there is wholegrain. I shoot for 40g of fiber a day and start my day with about 20 from cereal.
Next is to increase my exercise. Okay, that is going to be tough. You see the pictures of the guru's, all slim and perfect pictures of health, with a smile on their face. I won't ever get there, but maybe a few extra walks with the doggies will work as long as the back and knee holds up. A very quick ice fall took a negative toll on those 2 components of my system. Okay, back to work, break is over.

jayabee52 2011-03-23 22:50:49 -0500 Report

Well, Jim, I guess that for April, white chocolate is off your menu?

Jim Edwards
Jim Edwards 2011-03-24 10:08:52 -0500 Report

Are you nuts? Don't you know that for the 2 weeks before Easter and for the 2 weeks after Easter (so you can get the stuff on sale) that white chocolate has no carbs/sugars AND it helps to lower your A1C by 2 points if you eat at least 1/2 pound a day? If not, come to WV, where all your dreams come true! Okay, maybe I had a little too much chocolate! Actually I just got back from a root canal, I think I need some chocolate!

Jim Edwards
Jim Edwards 2011-03-25 10:11:26 -0500 Report

I am having a hard time finding the soild white chocolate this year. Only have found the hollow stuff. I think the Taliban has taken over the white chocolate industry. Diabetics everywhere need to unite and take back the chocolate factories!

blindbluesmama 2011-03-23 13:16:46 -0500 Report

haha. I know what you mean about the exercise. I hate it too. But I like going for walks in the fresh air. Ok, so I'm not huffing and puffing and dripping sweat when I'm done, but I feel tired and I moved my muscles and got winded a few times. I figure that's good. I know I was really addicted to cokes but now I can actually make a 12 pack of coke 0 last whole week. Wow. It's amazing what a life-threatening disease will do for your motivation. Basically cokes will kill me. Suddenly I have no desire to drink them. I do still love chocolate however. Andc it will kill me too but I wasn't eating chocolate on a regular basis so it's a little easier not to miss. Also I know there's sugar free stuff out there that's just as good. I do miss the cokes though even though I am not *craving them. Coke 0 is okay but you can still taste the diet sweeteners.

Jim Edwards
Jim Edwards 2011-03-24 10:14:12 -0500 Report

I am 56 or 57 and the older I get the worse the weight takes its toll on me, not only with the diabetes, but also with my knee & hip joints. I do inject nightly, but I may have to stop as summer is coming up and I won't be able to wear my thong with the bruising! Go ahead ROTF and L :)

Pynetree 2011-03-26 14:07:58 -0500 Report

ROTF is not an option for me…as getting up would be a major problem, most likely involving several strong helpers…But, Laughing…I'm good with that…partaking often, as I do chocolate.(which is why I've had to rule out ROTF!)

Jim Edwards
Jim Edwards 2011-03-23 14:31:29 -0500 Report

I am down to about 2 liters of soda a year. Once I got off of it, I was okay. It took about 3 months because of the sugar & caffine, but now, I will have it more for an upset stomach (or something to mix with my chocolate bar!) I found it easier to go no soda than the diet stuff. I found that aspertaime gave me headaches. So, my primary drink is water, followed by iced tea sweetened with Splenda or Stevia (or chocolate!)

blindbluesmama 2011-03-25 14:53:44 -0500 Report

Chocolate is good. I haven't touched the stuff except for one time when I thought my bs was really low. I thought it was a meter error which is gonna happen when you're not getting enough blood into the test strip. But then the next time it was low like that I tested again and twice it gave me a low reading. That time I didn't eat any chocolate, just ahd breakfast and tested again and it was normal. Well normal for me.

GabbyPA 2011-03-28 07:02:38 -0500 Report

Chocolate is not a good choice to bring up low levels....you will have to find another "reason" to eat chocolate. LOL It has too much fat in it to raise your levels quickly as required if you are having a low. You need to eat something more like a hard candy or since we are in the easter mode...jelly beans.

Sidehack 2011-03-23 06:26:18 -0500 Report

You're human! You will fall and stumble; you'll pig-out then regret it. The trick is to not beat yourself up; but to realize what you have to do and get back into a healthy frame of mind.

blindbluesmama 2011-03-23 13:35:06 -0500 Report

Well the pigging out part I've got down. But I don't really feel any regret for doing it. I guess maybe I need to work on that. I have no conscience when it comes to food.

AuntieBear 2011-03-23 00:28:50 -0500 Report

If I got an actual bruise for everytime I fell off the "get healthy horse" I would be the colour fo grape soda from head to toe and every body part in between! What keeps me going is the knowledge that if I keep getting back on the "get healthy horse" I might just get to the point that I stay on it longer and longer each time.

squog master
squog master 2011-03-24 00:46:43 -0500 Report

I'm so short that while on the horse I get nose bleeds from the height. So, I have to fall off once in a while so I don't bleed to death. LOL =}

blindbluesmama 2011-03-25 15:18:07 -0500 Report

Well I am not short. It must be my notorious bad balance that's the problem. When I started this discussion I thought this was one little oops. Unfortunately it wasn't. It was nothing too awful one at a time… but let's just say because we were so busy this week, I just had several different falls. It was more like one very long and protratcted fall. Or maybe a fell with a few struggles to get back up, hang on, whatever. But in the process, we learned that we can make healthier choices for next time. For instance, George's giros, of course has, what else, giros. but they also have… giro salad which cuts out the carbs and has veggies. So next time I'll get a giro salad and that eliminates the fries altogether. I did have a few of those, but was that was the day I had no strips so I don't think I checked it that day. I also learned that when eating at the chinese buffett, I actually can survive without all the fried stuff. And at the purple cow I learned that their grilled chicken saesar is really delicious. Their fruit cup is tasty too. I also learned that my fiance shouldn't say things at the beginning of the meal like "You're doing good so maybe we'll share a dessert and then change his mind because he thinks it would be better not to. I used to get really irritated about that before, now it's worse. So I just told him not to tell me stuff like that at the beginning of a meal if he's not going to stick to it. I'm st9ill myffed about not getting to share a sunday. The stupid things I get mad about. I mean, honestly, that fruit cup was delicious. It was sweet and all that and I ate pretty good yesterday. But it doesn't matter. I wanted ice cream. Not just ice cream but forbidden ice cream. The logical side of me is like get over it. I'm totally aware that I'm being irrashional. I'm aware that I have a lot of feelings I'm still dealing with and some of them are misplased. Anyway, when it got to be dinner time, that was the bottom of my fall, I hope. And so I was worried because my blood sugar was really high when I checked and so I had a little meltdown. I was not happy with myself. So Darrell, in his infinite wisdom, says, You're going to drive yourself crazy worrying about this. I'm just like what? Well you're crying. Yeah I'm crying. I've been juggling for twi weeks now and my arms are getting tired. My fingers are constantly sore. So great, I'm upset and you are making me worry now that I might go crazy. It was just a few tears, not hysterrics. When it comes to tears, it's better out than in. So today I have been nothing but nice to my blood sugar.

squog master
squog master 2011-03-25 18:12:09 -0500 Report

I have to be careful w/chinese food as I'm allergic to soy. I always get my foods with white sauce instead of brown. The dumbest thing is that I grew up with rice & soy sauce at every meal, even if dinner was pasta, cause Dad was filipino.

Maybe you can juggle 1 handed for a while & that will let 1 arm rest then switch & let the other arm rest. :)

I jus got a recipe for ice cream my niece did with kids at a pre-school she worked at yrs ago. every kid "churns" their own I'm going to try it tonight using Splenda & FF milk. The way you churn is by shaking the ingredients in a baggie so you also get some exercise making it. I'll let you know how it goes.

squog master
squog master 2011-03-26 13:31:11 -0500 Report

It worked very well. Was yummy and just enough for a snack. Easy too. Posted the recipe in the recipe section under snacks, desserts & under 10 carbs.

blindbluesmama 2011-03-23 02:44:48 -0500 Report

That makes me feel so much better. I seem to bne having a run of stumbles and falls lately. Not surprising. BNut each time, I do something a little different. Today we ate out at chinese buffet. I know. But Darrell tried to choose foods that were more or less nice. Lots of meat, a little noodles, some veggies. At the end he got me some fresh fruit. I think that I could still see plate when he set it in front of me, so I know that even if I may not have made the best choices, I controled my portions well. I only had two things that I was really thinking that in a perfect world I wouldn't have had, several strips of peanut butter chicken which are about the size and shape of an actual finger so kind of small and one crab wonton. I wasn't going to eat it but Darrell was like you can have one small bad thing He tries to be a realist and sometimes he says things on the lines of that sometimes worrying too much is just as bad as not worrying enough about this thing. It's like this. There's going to be times when socially I'm *required to go out with friends, with family. I can't just lock myself in the closet with a lean cousine dinner and a piece of fruit and hope that everyone leaves me alone. But I can skip the egg roles and the crab rolls and the fried whatcha madoodles and the yummy desserts. Which I did all that. And what about my post perandial thing? It was about average *for me* after a meal. It doesn't matter what I eat, it seems that that stays around 240 after meals but is lower other times of the day. So anyway, I did some exercise when I checked my blood sugar, and in the interest of ecucating myself, I checked my bs again and it was 194. The doctor said I shouldn't worry about the blood sugars, like not to freak when the numbers go up like that. From what I understand, this is like an education process. It doesn't mean necessarily that i'm doing bad, but you know, there's always room for improvement. And what he made it sound like is when I start to lose weight, my blood sugar will come down, and as long as I keep controling my portions and keep exercising that will start to happen. I have already lost weight since two weeks ago. I was up around 216 and now I am 209. So my self-assignment is that I am going to stop going Oh no every time I do a post perandial and it's very high. I will not beat myself up or tell myself I'm a bad diabetic. I will do some exercise or just eat something different next meal. I'm going to do this one meal at a time and some meals will be better than other. It's not the high blood sugar for a few minutes that will lose me a limb anyway. It's the continous and uncontroled high blood sugar. Like if I decided that I should start drinking diet sodas, eating handfulls of crackers and chips at night and buying big cases of cookies like we used to do, that would be making a choice to have something cut off. But I am eating a lot better. And this is how my self-talk goes. Tomorrow, I will have one slice of toast instead of two… if I even have toast. I may have something else. I am going to look at this like I do every diet I start. There's no such thing as a bad food. That's right. No such thing as a bad food. But there are, unfortunately some foods that we eat too much of . Just like if you fill a glass full of water and you fill it too full it runs over. Or if you put sugar in your gas tank your car explodes. Or maybe a better example is dish soap. If you put a small amount of dish soap in your sink and turn on the water you get nice bubbles and you can wash your dishes. But put too much and the bubbles go everywhere and you've got a big mess. I kind of look at food the same way. Treats are god. But they have to *stay* treats and not constants. Before I was constantly eating stuff that should only be eaten once in a while, all the time. I guess I'll know I'm doing better when I feel guilty about a raisin bran muffin. Right now I'm like, I wouldn't feel guilty about that. I'd call that a smart choice cuz the raisins are packed with vitamins and the bran will make you go. Win win. Now a chocolate chip cookie, that I'd feel guilty about. But my sugar isn't so great still and I'm still learning how to ride the horse, let alone stay on. I guess comparing my guilty pleasures to the guilty pleasures of other is probably not such a good thing in retrospect. We all have different pleasure receptors in our brains, and like I say we are at different places. I'm going wow, that girl that said her blood sugar was high at 170, I thought she was doing great considering mine is 240 sometimes after a post perandial. Sometimes higher. But see, I'm not at the same place as that person. That's like feeling bad because I can't swim like Michael felps when I haven't ever practiced or trained. It's like feeling guilty because I can't play the guitar like Eric Claptin. I've got to be where I am. And right now a 240 ppbs is better than one that's 285 or 290. Of course, a 168 is better. My target is 140. That's what the doc said to shoot for. I don't know if I'll ever get there. I would have to live on maybe one thing at a meal instead of three. Breakfast, yogourt. Lunch half a sandwich. Dinner salad. I'd be wanting to eat people by this point. Right now I've decided that three things on my plate is enough usually And one or maybe two things at a snack. Cheese and crackers or handful of mixed nuts or a yogourt. Whatever. Anyway I had a lot of fun tonight with my friends. It's amazing how much less thirsty I am. And the doc said that's also good that my symptoms are better. He said that is one sign that I am improving even if my ppbs is not where I want it to be. That's why he said don't worry about it so much, just take it in stride. But anyway, I exercised in my resistance chair. I love that thing when I don't really feel like walking. And I had the radio on xm love. So then Darrell and I did a kind of demo of one of his songs and that was really cool. The only reason I'm not sleeping is because my legs are a little achy. But still much better than they were a few weeks ago. And because I've been having a strange problem the last few nights. I am fine all during the day but late at night i start to feel very sick. My body aches and it feels like a cold coming on. I feel like I have fever but when I check with the thermometer it says it's normal. And I ache and feel like crap. Then I wake up in the morning and i don't feel like crap any more. Well, going to check other replies now. I hope this helps someone or at the least was amusing.

squog master
squog master 2011-03-22 22:48:21 -0500 Report

What is this!? The Ides of March? :) No, that's 3/15. There's been a lot of falling of the horse today.

I had to do my A1c test today. But also had to get my back xrayed for pain I've had for the passed 12 days. I took my meds with me. After the blood work I ate my snack (PB pretzels & OJ) as I waited for the xrays so I could take my meds that I need to take w/food. before I took the meds they took me for the xrays. So, then of course the meds went out of mind due to the painfulness of the xrays, laying on a hard table having to manuver into place. By the time I was done it was 10:30 & I was hungry as all get out. I knew the snack was no longer in my stomach so I needed to eat again anyway to take the meds. I went to Cracker Barrel & had eggs, turkey sausage, hash browns, biscuits, & grits. So now it's 11:45.

I had a dr appt with the hernia surgeon in that area at 1pm. Went to pick up a new heating pad to use up some time. Went to the appt. Wound is coming along down to penny/dime size now. but from all the events of the day & in & out of the car now I'm hurting like a fiend. To top things off I've been experiencing stomach pains where all I want to do is curl up in bed & wait for them to subside. Most likely from the predisone. But there is no rhyme or reason as to when they come. AM, PM, empty belly, full belly, doesn't matter. So they started while I was in the pharmacy. They can last 15mins to a few hours.

I knew when I got home I needed to take my 2nd set of meds some involving having food in my stomach again but all I wanted to do is crawl into bed and curl up like a shrimp. So, I stop on the way home & pick up a Tasty Kake to eat as soon as I get home so I don't have to figure out what else to eat. I get home approx 2pm. throw the cake & meds down my throat & crawl into bed & curl up. Finally some relief! Sigh…

Later I had my proteins for dinner. What did I have? Shrimp!:D

blindbluesmama 2011-03-23 02:50:01 -0500 Report

Lol. That sucks that you're hurting so bad and all that. I'm not laughing about that. But just at the way you posted. It was amusing. What's a tasty cake? Are they good? Oh I have a trick I thought of myself for when I want to eat something sweet like ice cream or something I know is bad. I just think of a food I don't like. Broccoli and cheese or eggs or canned green beans or liver and instantly like magic the craving goes away.

squog master
squog master 2011-03-23 04:51:02 -0500 Report

A friend of mine would say, "That sucks for you!" The laugh is all in the telling.

Tasty Kakes are a brand of snack cakes & pies sold only in a small area of the country, for freshness, basically the Philly area. They are the best, bar none. The cakes are always moist. And they have so many varieties. Oooops! Started to drool there. :)

Green Beans! Now, I use to hate green beans. For the entire hilarious story go to the discussion "what are your favorite bad foods". See my reply on March 11th. It'll give you another laugh.

And speaking about laughing, Once my potassium level dropped due to a med I was taking for allergies and I had vertigo from fluid in my ears at the time. When the potassium drops I get cramps in weird places. So it's the middle of the night and the cramps start. I bolt up in bed and the room starts spinning. I let it subside & cramping badly, I make my way to the frig for my OJ which is my quick fix as it is high in Potassium and absorbs into the body the quickest. Being single, I forgo the glass & I start chugging the OJ right from the carton. I tilt the carton back so far the room starts spinning again! Luckily I didn't spill any OJ or fall down. Cramping still I get a glass so I don't have to tilt my head back so far. I manage to get the OJ into me & make my way back to bed. As I laid there I just started laughing at the ludicrousness of the situation. I laughed so hard I got tears in my eyes.

Sometimes all you can do is laugh. :D

I have 3 sayings:
1. I don't smoke, I don't drink, I just do drugs.
2. I have to be going to Heaven cause it's been H**l here on Earth.
3. With all my scars, surgeries, broken bones, & ailments, if I tried to leave my body to science it would be returned "Damaged Goods"

MewElla 2011-03-23 08:05:33 -0500 Report

Speaking about laughing…this broke me up…you have a terrific sense of humor and great attitude…I loved this one…

blindbluesmama 2011-03-23 13:22:51 -0500 Report

Me too. This is funny stuff. I love your sense of humor. I could just see you all dizzy drinking oj. I'll have to remember that trick about ok when I have real bad cramps like last night. I did not get a lot of sleep. And now, I ran out of strips but didn't realize I was low. More to the point, I did see I was low just didn't realize how low. Everyone keeps asking if I have insurance to buy these and I don't but luckily they aren't too expensive I guess.

squog master
squog master 2011-03-23 20:18:15 -0500 Report

The vertigo incident happened about 5-6 yrs ago & until this very minute I never thought that I should have used a straw. DUH! :D

krystalm 2011-03-22 20:30:51 -0500 Report

its hard to eat exactly like we are supposed to all the time. and ur right the carb counting really gets frustrating. no one is perfect!

GabbyPA 2011-03-22 20:06:53 -0500 Report

My momma always told me that my halo was held up by my horns. If my guilt trip was on something so "small" I would be thrilled. Mine usually ends up because of a chocolate bar or fish and chips...we all fall down and get those halos a bit tarnished. I have lots of polish if you want to borrow some.

blindbluesmama 2011-03-23 02:55:38 -0500 Report

I am learning that diabetes isn't the big fear thing that it seems at first. I mean yes should take it seriously and do our very best and try earnestly to eat healthy every single day and not slack off. But also that lightning isn't going to strike when I stray. It's kind of like being a Christian. Or any religion. The higher power knows what's best for us but we don't always make the best choices. But the trick is to try try try and then try even harder. It's not like before when you went on a diet and got sick of it and just went for ice cream and didn't stop till you were licking the bottom of the carton. We must walk this healthy path for the whole rest of our lives and try not to step off in the grass or trip on a crack or run into a parked car. We must use our canes and our upper arms when necessary. We must ask for assistance and not be too proud. And we must be independent enough to do it our own way. At least I think that is how this song is supposed to go.

moora 2011-03-22 18:12:04 -0500 Report

I lost it today too. After work my daughter and I went to Dunkin Donut to get coffee and I felt like I am hungry and wanted to have their muffin. My daughter kept saying that I am going to regret it. But, I didn;t listen to her and took Bran raisan muffin. of course after an hour I felt guilty and went to the gym with my daughter and worked out for 45 minutes. Still my sugar was 191 after two hours. The guilt is still there, hopefully, I will listen to my daughter next time.

blindbluesmama 2011-03-23 03:06:16 -0500 Report

You have a beautiful name. I hope you are no longer feeling guilty. I have an idea though. Perhaps you should next time have some protein in your purse for a time when you get the muffin craving. Eat a handful of nuts with the muffin. Maybe they make peanut butter in little containers to go or something. I don't know, anybody else got any ideas for portable and yummy protein? I mean, Lady Gaga's raw meat dress was interesting but I don't recommend we all start carrying bacon or steaks in our purses. Although I have heard that can be a man magnet. Forget cinamon. Just carry bacon. No seriously. There has to be something that actually tastes like something that I would want to put in my mouth that is portable and high in protein. Nuts are good as I said, and also soy nuts and ostrich sticks. They look like beef sticks or slim jims but are much leaner and better for you but kind of expensive.Maybe you could get one of those baby bell cheeses. I love those things and the size is just right. One cheese is one serving. I am not sure if they make reduced fat. I don't do reduced fat most of the time. I just eat smaller servings of the stuff that is regular fat. I don't trim fat yet either, but that is one thing I know I will have to start doing if my cholesteral is too high. But I have cut back a lot of my red meat so figure what I get to have I should enjoy. But I've gone from rib-eyes to new york strips. So I'm reducing the size anyway. On this healthy road, some of us walk a bit more slowly and reluctantly than others. Just wait I'll catch up.

cavie2 2011-03-22 19:46:56 -0500 Report

I find if I slip up on what I eat, a 20 minute cardio workout can bring my blood sugar count down. Any other type of exercise does nothing for it. Hope this helps

blindbluesmama 2011-03-23 03:16:00 -0500 Report

Ug. I want to find a cardio workout that is good doesn't bore me to tears and actually makes me feel better when I'm done. So far the only thing I've found is walking. Gotta get Darrell to teach me a route that I can do any time around the neighborhood by myself. I don't want to have to depend on others or I'll never do it. But I don't do exercise bikes, have been told not to do the eliptical and I don't run. Mostly too much stress on my poor knees which have no carteledge. Well not my left anyway. I want to ge tthat swim spa. But I'm determined that if I get it I'm going to install it in such a way that I will be able to use it all year. Swimming is the only thing that makes me feel better when I'm done and is cardio yet relaxing at the same time. Mom says I should get a reclining bike and I surely would but I know that I'll use it for a week or two and then realize that it's just a bike and that it bores me to tears because it doesn't move. It just sits there and doesn't go anywhere and I'm still sitting there in the house pushing the pedals and it's not fun it's exercise which is work. Swimming now, that's fun.

blindbluesmama 2011-03-22 18:55:04 -0500 Report

Be careful… guilt can be addictive. It's better to not feel guilty for what you can't change and just move forward and do better. Does that make sense? Guilt can be a tool, but like anything, if overused, it can be trap. Too much guilt then you get depressed. It was good that you went and worked out. VBery proactive.

jayabee52 2011-03-22 18:30:46 -0500 Report

But then again, we don't like our spouses, children, relatives, or significant others becoming our "Diabetes police." Often in situations like that I get my hackles up and go ahead and do it just because "they can't tell ME what to do!" *grumble grumble*.

But we all slip up sometimes, and as Ray said below those who say they don't are liars.

Go easy on yourself. Get back in the battle for the control of your diabetes. It's not the end of the world, or of you if you slipped a bit. What would be even worse would be to say "what the H, I blew it, so now it's open season on the muffins from now on". That would REALLY be bad.

Cut yourself some slack, please on this one.

Anonymous 2011-03-23 03:23:27 -0500 Report

You think like me. *grin* I love support but don't like anyone going you'd better not eat that, or do this, or whatever. Case in point, Mom when she found out I had DM goes, no sugar at all ever until your numbers come down and avoid restaurants. Well I've done pretty good on the former but have been to three restaurants in the past few days. But was only truly rebelious at one of them. The others, I think I did well controling the size of the food I ate at least if not necessarily the content. I keep reminding myself that despite my need for polish I am still doing much better than I was two weeks ago. Etc. Etc. Second verse, same as the first.

RAYT721 2011-03-22 17:51:22 -0500 Report

I believe that eight out of ten people have indulged in bad behavior at least once in their lives and the other two are liars.

Beating ourselves up for being human doesn't really accomplish much. You can and should sometimes "live a little" … but be sure to pick yourself up and dust yourself off and move forward. You can vow NEVER to do something like that again but, seriously, you will. It's okay to be bad… maybe not THAT bad, but you can be a little bad now and then. The problem comes when people treat themselves and then takes on the attitude that they are failures and go on to do worse things. Forgive yourself and get back on the horse and ride.

I've done some stupid things (food and non-food related) in my life as a diabetic and before I was diabetic. We're only human! It's is important to love ourselves for both our sane and insane traits.

Now, where did I hide that chocolate cream puff?

blindbluesmama 2011-03-23 03:26:27 -0500 Report

You win the award for most humorous post. I really can't sleep tonight. I hurt all over and just feel nasty. I am pretty sufe that since I haven't eaten anything since six or so, it's not a blood sugar thing since it was on the way down after I exercised. I suppose it could be this uti or something. I don't know but whatever it is is seriously cramping my style.

Harlen 2011-03-22 16:15:46 -0500 Report

I know how it is and it was the chick not the cheesecake factory lol
Your still shiny to me
Keep working on it you will get there
Best wishes

jayabee52 2011-03-22 13:41:45 -0500 Report

One of the things I have done in times past when I fell off the horse, is exactly what you have done. I came on DC and confessed my transgressions. I received comfort, forgiveness, support, and occasionally a well needed kick in the pants from many who have been there, done that..

I got back on the horse and rode it until the next time I ended up in the dust. I'm glad your body is adapting to your condition. Sometimes your body "knows" when your mind doesn't want to.

blindbluesmama 2011-03-22 15:30:14 -0500 Report

Well, I try to, at night before I go to sleep think good positive thoughts about healing and being healthy and my body knowing what to do what to eat and when. I try very hard to listen to my body and not my mind… I.E. brain wakes up in the middle of the night and goes hmmm time for a little something… then I'm like ok but if you do that it's that much longer til you can have some breakfast. You know, the fsting bs thing. That's usually no that's always enough to send me straight back to sleep.

LennyDenny 2011-03-22 11:13:59 -0500 Report

You know yesterday must have been a bad day all around. I usually pack lunch, but yesterday I stood in front of the fridge and just didn't see anything that I wanted to take for lunch. So as you said I really diped the halo. there's a grocery store about 2 block from the office, to make a long story short I went to the deli counter and ordered 3 pieces of fried chicken with 4 fried potato wedges. The blood sugar went sky high (around 296) needless to say I like you spent the rest of the day punishing myself and eating very little. Today everything is back down to normal. That will be the last time in quite a while till I make that mistake again. We all need to learn our lessons every once in a while. Take care!!

blindbluesmama 2011-03-22 14:04:18 -0500 Report

I never look at it as punnishing myself. That will get you into a guilt trap. It's just like, ok I ate some stuff that kind of cut into my carb allowance for the day. I need to be a little bit more careful now and make some better choices. I personally don't want a lot of food policing in my life, but that's why I started this discussion. I like hearing about how others handle these situations. I think that the supportive stuff I've heard about partners or spouses is wonderful.

LennyDenny 2011-03-23 07:10:32 -0500 Report

I guess punishing may not be the right word, but with all the things I have going on in my life I can't afford to make to many slips like that. When I do, I try to remind myselft why I have the problems I have and then things can get back to what I might call normal. I can be my own worst enemy sometimes, I'm to self critical. But there are day I have to be. But when I do make those slips I enjoy them while I can.

jayabee52 2011-03-22 15:43:39 -0500 Report

If your fiancee is willing to deal with and help you to deal with your blindness and your DM, I would say he's a keeper. Over the years I've been on DC, I have read stories of wonderful, supportive spouses, and stories of what I call spouses from hell.

My first (now ex) wife told a college friend once she had dropped the Divorce bomb on me, "well he might just go off his meds again and get complications, and then I'd have to take care of him".

We have 3 sons together, and when I came to her (formerly our) house, she greeted me warmly, but when I was out of the room, my date returned to the kitchen to find her crying in the arms of her friend saying that she had been afraid that she'd never see me alive again.

There's another guy on DC who told us that his wife just walked away from him and divorced him soon after he got Dx'd. There are ladies whose hubbies refuse to stop eating ice cream and then waving their spoon in her face saying "Ha Ha! You can't have this!" Talk about cruel!

So it sounds like he's a keeper. But I guess you've already figured that out as you're getting married to him.

Bridgetsmom 2011-03-23 14:04:34 -0500 Report

I agree so hard to find someone who understands or wants to help you deal wih things going on in your life.I have been married for almost 29 years and my hubby has been there for me no matter what the situation,even when he did'nt understand it.The diabetes has been a little hard for him in that I will say I want something I know I should'nt have and he will say just a little wont hurt..Truth is maybe it will and maybe it won't.I have fallen off a few times and then beat myself up for failing,but I think we have to cut ourselves at least a little slack.This diabetes is hard enough without me beating myself up for slips.Besides I find that if i start over stressing it then I have higher numbers because Im stressing.
Hubby has stopped saying a little wont hurt after I fussed about him not knowing what he was talking about.Not one of my finer moments because I know he is just trying to help,he just isnt sure how.Thank God he is a patcient person.
I think there are people who can handle these things and others who can't…Hang onto the ones that can =)

realsis77 2011-03-22 11:02:31 -0500 Report

Hi.well the important thing is to jump back on the horse after you fall off! Its good that you made better choices after you fell! Yes I do have someone at home that plays the diabetic poliece for me! Its my husband. When I try to make bad choices he will stop me. Even when we are out or at a bbq he will say no your diabetic! Then I can't get away with it because everyone around hears him. Ha ha. So basically he makes sure I do my best.if I fall its when he's not looking. I'm on insulin so he will say you don't want an extra shot do you? He really tries to keep me on track. :)

squog master
squog master 2011-03-22 23:21:12 -0500 Report

I'm slightly allergic to chocolate. Straight up chocolate is worse than if it's an ingredient father down in the list. 1 day at my eldest brother's house for a Christmas party I decided to have a small square of brownies my niece made.
Well, I started coughing & sneezing because unknown to me she had big chunks of chocolate in the brownies.

6 weeks later the Eagles were in the Super Bowl & they had a Super Bowl party. As I walked in the door my S-I-L announced to the crowd, "DO NOT LET BO (my nickname) NEAR THE BROWNIES. WE ARE NOT TAKING HER TO THE HOSPITAL IF SHE HAS AN ALLERGIC REACTION DURING THIS GAME!" LOL :D

She was nice enough to make a vanilla SF cake for the Feb birthdays which included me.

LennyDenny 2011-03-22 11:24:25 -0500 Report

Hi. My wife is the same way and I'm glad, she keeps me on track. But at 5:30 in the morning I don't expect her to get up and watch when I make lunch. She knows that I will normally make good choices, I just slip once in a while. She also remindes me when I eat the right things, just a little to much.

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