I'm so tired of Diabetes,

hellohaze
By hellohaze Latest Reply 2013-11-08 03:27:57 -0600
Started 2011-03-16 03:38:54 -0500

And I've only had it for 10 months. I'm tired of everything. I'm tired of my mood swings, of checking my sugar levels four times a day, of pricking my finger, of the sting after I inject my insulin, of the reaction from people who find out I was in a coma, of the different ways people treat me; as if I was a crippled person who was completely helpless that I needed help with everything. I hate everything about it. I hate it.
I hate the fact that it takes 5 years to get the right insulin pen that I need to stay alive, I hate that I have to watch what I eat, I hate that I have to watch everybody I'm around eat whatever they want, whenever they want and how they never have to poke their leg with a needle and shoot up their dose of insulin.
I feel like nobody in this town understands how I feel, what I feel, and why I feel the way I do. I swear; nobody does. I'm just so, so tired.

Had to vent a little.


25 replies

kgTrek
kgTrek 2013-11-08 04:27:57 -0500 Report

I hate it all also. I don't deny that I need my medications and my pills nd everything, but knowing what could happen is depressing. Diabetic neuropathy, diabetic ketoacidosis, coma. I was mad when I woke from that last one…so close. My parents are diabetif, I have friends who were diabetic. My mother is now a multiple stroke victim and my friend has died. Who wants to keep going through with the medicine knowing that death, an early death is the expected out come.

I'm sorry. I am venting as well. I am a diabtic and a major depressive as I think many diabetics may be. But I sometimes wish I could stop being diabetic, or just stop being.

Yogirajj
Yogirajj 2011-04-01 12:05:49 -0500 Report

When I started Shots, I loved it, because it was keeping me healthy and out of harms way. But after year+ of my body having some contact with a needle over 5,000 times, I really got sick of it, and it became a phycological and emotional issue.

I've grown to hate shot's so much so, that I decided to get the Animas pump; and i've been madly in-love ever since!!! It has changed my life so much for the better (exponentially).

I am also on the Dexcom 7+; which has also made my life much easier. Between my Dexcom and Animas, I can live a more safer diabetic life, with the least amount of stress.

inneedofhelp
inneedofhelp 2011-03-31 22:24:49 -0500 Report

Listen ok you are not alone, even the people who think that they are "healthy" can get diabeties. This disease doesn't know sex, race or gender, it goes after everyone and anyone. All you have to remember is stay head strong and you will see that you can overcome this disease each and everyday. You need to find "true" friends who will support you and give you the guidance you need. Good luck and remember you are not alone.

josem.urena72
josem.urena72 2011-03-23 11:03:56 -0500 Report

Hey… don't bash it!! It won't make it better.. Been dealing with mine for 30 years… I promise that it will get better in time.. Look into Pump Therapy.. For a young lady like yourself it will provide more freedom.. Trust me you will no longer hate the people eating yummy things around you..

spizale143
spizale143 2011-03-23 10:44:58 -0500 Report

Are you finish feeling sorry for yourself??? Now get over it because your condition ISN'T going away. Grow up and LIVE. I too got "tired" of the whole routine. I even told my husband before bedtime one night that I'm not taking any insulin and when I wake up tomorrow I WON'T be diabetic!! What a joke, my blood sugar was so high, I'm surprised I woke up! Sweetheart, You ARE NOT ALONE!
Maybe you need to change friends if they don't help you out. When you go to a party plan ahead. You can eat anything you want, just not in the quality that your friends are eating. Good luck.

nanaellen
nanaellen 2011-03-20 12:04:38 -0500 Report

Boy do I know THAT feeling!! Please don't EVER think your alone because your NOT!!! When I first found out 6 years ago I couldn't believe it either!! I went from nothing to 3 shots during the day and one at night! I absolutely HATE needles, I always have!! And everyone said oh you'll get used to it. Here I am 6 years later and guess what??!! STILL not used to it!! You said that your insulin stings?? What kind of insulin?? I take lantus at night and it used to sting me too! I talked to the Nurse Hotline and asked them if I was doing something wrong, and they told me well, they DID tell you to put the needle at a 45 degree angle right? NO they didn't!! She told me insulin is MEANT to be delivered just under the skin. If you go straight in you are breaking blood vessels and if you rub the injection site it will create a bruise! PLUS the biggest thing I can tell you about the sting is warm your insulin to at LEAST room temp. before injecting! Plus injecting slowly will help too!! It REALLY helps take the sting out of it!! Hope this helps you. And please don't give up it's GOTTA get better!!! And VENT VENT VENT if you have to cause we ALL understand!!

sherifawson
sherifawson 2011-03-17 11:21:47 -0500 Report

I've had Type 1 for 25 years. For about 20 of those years I was angry and resentful and thought it was extremely unfair. What changed for me was developing a system that I could do and still have a high quality of life. My system is easy enough to form a habit and now that the habit is formed it doesn't feel like it takes away from my lifestyle. Plus I get to feel good about taking care of my body and that keeps me motivated to stay with my system. Your system needs to be one that works in the same way for you and contains physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual remedies. My resentment remained strong as long as I was only treating my disease at the physical level. I hope this post will help.

hellohaze
hellohaze 2011-03-17 13:18:26 -0500 Report

Thank you! When I was first diagnosed, I didn't really think anything of it. I was kind of in denial about the whole thing. And, after a while I became okay with it. It's just some days I get down, I want to do everything I used to and be who I used to me. But, I remember that I'm still that same person. I just have to be more careful about my choices and take really good care of my body. I'm working on a system, still. But, hopefully I get it down. :)

sherifawson
sherifawson 2011-03-17 14:41:55 -0500 Report

Awesome. I know you are and it seems you are working patiently. It's great to have this community to support us.

wrmjw1
wrmjw1 2011-03-17 10:04:06 -0500 Report

I understand what youre going through. Ive only had diabetes for a few months and Im sick and tired of all of it. The whole thing just makes me upset. The sad fact is that I knew that I was going to get it, it was only a question of when. I have to watch my family eat what they want and I cant,for example yesterday was my sisters birthday and everybody was just eating all sorts of stuff, and I couldnt because my sugar was high before I went to her house. Instead of checking my sugar four times a day( which is impossible for me) I just check it in the morning and right before dinner and at night before I go to bed. Thats only 3 times, its not a real solution but its a start. The lunch time area, I usually just go by how I feel, if I feel alright I'll eat something light, if my sugars too high then I just eat something like a granola bar. The main point is that youre not alone in hating diabetes.

hellohaze
hellohaze 2011-03-17 13:23:57 -0500 Report

Oooh, yes. I definately know how you feel about the birthday party eating. I had my sister's party just right after Christmas, and everybody was chowing down on cake, ice cream, candy; everything I can't have. I think I just had a tiny, tiiny little piece of cake, and half a scoop of ice cream. I know it's hard at first, it's a huge, dramatic change in your life that kind of stops you dead in your tracks of where you're going at first, but after a while it gets better. I know my first months of diabetes was hard. I gave myself my day time dosage at night on accident and had to eat 4 meals worth of food (it sounds kind of awesome, but it really, really wasn't, haha.) Plus, I was diagnosed right before I graduated, and right before summer. It gets better. :)

Saintsboy
Saintsboy 2011-03-17 01:11:19 -0500 Report

Hi. I've been a diabetic myself for almost 17 years now. During my experience as a diabetic, I get tired of it myself. But now, I'm on the insulin pump, and it helps me. I, myself do hope that there will be a cure for diabetes one day for everyone.

hellohaze
hellohaze 2011-03-17 13:26:20 -0500 Report

Oh, yeah. My friend and I always say we're going to find that cure. And, currently they're working on a cure. I just hope it's soon. I've heard a lot about the pump! I just got switched to the pens, which I love a whole lot more than shots.

realsis77
realsis77 2011-03-16 14:24:21 -0500 Report

Hi ! I've had diabetes for seven months now. Its so tough sometimes. Having to bring syringes to bbqs! The shots were the hardest to get used to. I'm getting much better at them now. Sometimes I get mad that the first thing I have to do when I get up is take a shot! Trust me, I know how you feel!

hellohaze
hellohaze 2011-03-17 00:56:37 -0500 Report

Hello! I'm surely getting used to it, it's just one of those dramatic changes. I definately know what you're talking about when you have to bring syringes to BBQs. Recently, I got switched to insulin pens! Which I definately recommend. They really help when I'm at work, or in class, or even out of town and I need to eat. I don't have to worry about keeping them cold the whole time, and I feel they're a lot easier to use. Thank you!:)

jayabee52
jayabee52 2011-03-16 11:39:54 -0500 Report

Vent to your heart's content. We can take it here! We know what it's like. We've been there ourselves.

hellohaze
hellohaze 2011-03-17 01:04:41 -0500 Report

Thanks! I'm glad I found some way to communicate with people who know where I'm coming from. Usually when I talk about these things with people, they act like it's a foreign language, haha.

jeffrey9127
jeffrey9127 2011-03-16 09:45:08 -0500 Report

At times I feel as you do about having Diabetes. It is not pleasant going through the things that you are going through, but these are the things we must do to stay healthy with this disease. Even though I can sometimes get upset at having Diabetes, I remember that I have a great family, and friends who are on my side. Remember, the injections, BS testing, and eating right, will help you live a long heathy life. Try to embrace life, and know that living with Diabetes is part of it. Good luck to you.

hellohaze
hellohaze 2011-03-17 00:59:50 -0500 Report

Thank you so much! It is hard, and I usually don't let myself get so down about it. When I start to, though, I always remember all of my family and friends who support me and push me to always live life no matter what life throws at me.

sherifawson
sherifawson 2011-03-17 11:28:24 -0500 Report

It's a huge mental shift to get use to the fact. It takes years. I cried and my two-year-old son cried with me. He didn't understand why his mom was so sad. It's a journey, so they say. We have it for some reason. There is something for us to learn here I think.

hellohaze
hellohaze 2011-03-17 13:30:41 -0500 Report

Oh, definately. At first I felt like I took life before diabetes forgranted, I could eat what I wanted, when I wanted. I could go out with friends and not worry about getting low all the time. So many things. But after a while I thought more about it, and even though I have diatetes, it doesn't mean I've lost my life.

Gabby
GabbyPA 2011-03-16 09:23:12 -0500 Report

I have been on that wagon a few times myself. I get an attitude when I really "want" something that is just doesn't matter because my levels are high anyway. I get defeated. It is all part of the mood swing and if I can make myself realize that, I can stop it. But sometimes I just don't care and I am not insulin dependent like you are. So I imagine your frustration is huge.

Then I stop and look at my family and all the things I want to accomplish. I see the places I have not gone to yet and the pity party will end. Everyone has a different thing that will help them crawl out of the frustration. For me it is those things. You will have other things that help. Venting is a good place to start. =0)

hellohaze
hellohaze 2011-03-17 01:03:18 -0500 Report

Thank you! I definately know where you're coming from. My boyfriend and I go grocery shopping and get everything I can eat, and 3 things I shouldn't. Mostly incase my blood sugars are low, but a little bit for my cravings for something sweet every now and then.

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